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ilovetheholylandParticipant
there is a dr. in manhattan by the name of dr. luis j arrone. he is a metabolic endocrinolgist, and deals with a diet plan along with meds to help with weight loss. he is tops in his field and may be hard getting an appointment with, and hes also extremely expensive, but im telling you, ITS WORTH IT!
ilovetheholylandParticipantmore of a loner 🙂 although i do enjoy a good party once in a blue…
ilovetheholylandParticipantwhat about for girls that are not stick skinny?
ilovetheholylandParticipantwiy
you are right. i should not have been painting them all with the same brush and i should give them the benefit of the doubt. but as i mentioned before, i saw it first hand and it just shocked me being that i never saw anything like this before. i come from a very large family, mostly boys and i just know that my brothers would never act like that.
also as i did mention in my OP, the guy was not a relative. he was close to the family that was making the simcha. i recall seeing him only ONCE before this shabbos. so there were no personal feelings involved. as a matter of fact, some of the guys that were being mean to the guy are cousins of mine. maybe thats why i was so shocked. being family and all, i would expect more from them…
ilovetheholylandParticipanti disagree.
and anyway, bad middos puts a mark on a person and his neshama. self esteem is an issue that he has to work on and overcome, it doesnt define him as a person.
ilovetheholylandParticipantmany people view the kosel as a tourist attraction forgetting what wall really represents. (i hate to say this, but many times the sem girls are no better. i’ve seen girls go to the kosel, talking on the phone, calling their families to go check them out on the kotel cam and then they wave madly…)
ilovetheholylandParticipanta little girl i know asked her mom, “mommy, right im 5 and 3 quarters?” her mother confirmed it. a few seconds later the littler brother said to his mother, “ma, right im 3 and a penny?” so cute!
ilovetheholylandParticipantpopa –
i let. believe me, i dont WANT these guys to have bad middos and im sorry if thats the way i came accross. it just made a really deep impression on me… id much rather it be an issue of self esteem.
ilovetheholylandParticipantcherry – i didnt read all the previous posts but what makes you think we’re not doing our part?
ilovetheholylandParticipantwhere do you live? i know that where i live, there are always places advertising to sell your gold and silver.
ilovetheholylandParticipant“these kids didn’t have bad middos, they had bad self esteem”
all ten guys from different families?!?!? maybe! i think it was the type that you had to be there and witness it first hand…
ilovetheholylandParticipant“we shouldn’t be so tough on others because we aren’t perfect either and while they may have a problem in one area, you may have a glaring problem in another and you wouldn’t want some guy writing a thread on a forum about a chisaron he saw in you.”
your 100% right. i dont mean to judge the guys. but there are certain things that everybody knows. let me show you how the conversation went.
SLOW GUY: “hey shmerel (no that was not the guys name…) whats up?”
SHMEREL:”everythings good, i didnt see you in so long (sarcastically) now could you please move out of my way?”
SG: “what? i didnt hear what you said”
SHMEREL: “the last five words i said were “MOVE OUT OF MY WAY”
exactly like that. and i dont think they were drunk but even if they were, chazzal say that when a person is drunk his true essence is seen. granted women are more sensetive then men, but there is something called mentchlichkeit and super sensetivity to those more unfortunate then we are. im sorry, but a person who could be so heartless and cruel does not have good middos in my books. yes, i do have my many chisronos but the way i see it this is not just a sensitivity…a somthing nice to do. were talking about treating another human being respectfully. (at the most, treating him like a regular person.) and if a person cannot excell in the middos of ben adam lachaveiro, i wonder how he can excell ben adam lamakom.
ilovetheholylandParticipantdont feel bad cooljude…i wanted one for a while and asked a few times…nothing ever came of it. im just not gonna beg!
ilovetheholylandParticipantme too? please?
ilovetheholylandParticipant“On a date, make sure you speak of people with various disabilities to see if there is compassion and empathy…. admiration or jokery.”
not sure if you were being serious or not, but its really a good idea!
ilovetheholylandParticipantgefen –
AMEN!!! and to all your kids too!
ilovetheholylandParticipant“…Wow!!! This is horrible!!! To think these boys are the age for shidduchim!!! I hope none of them are redt for my daughters!!!”
exactly why i named this thread “good middos!” everybody is always wants a guy with amazing middos. could be these guys are awesome guys in every other way, but i would NEVER date ANY of them!!! (not talking about the nice one of course…) the only problem is (which freaks me out,) is that on a date, you would NEVER be able to tell that they would say things like this.
ilovetheholylandParticipantpeter piper picked a pan of pickled peppers. if peter piper picked a pan of pickled peppers, where are the peppers that peter piper picked?
(somthing like that…)
ilovetheholylandParticipant“…If you personally know at least one of these “mean guys”, you should confront him in a nice way…”
im still killing myself that i didnt say something to them. although i dont really know if it wouldve helped. they are all older than me and they probably would not have taken it from me…
“…I took this counselor aside, and very quietly told her that if she ever made a remark like that again she would answer to me and she had no business working at HASC with that attitude…”
she deffinatly should NOT have been there with that attitude!
most of these ‘special’ people have hearts of GOLD and are so sincere in everything they say and do! they love everybody unconditonally and they never see peoples faults or weaknesses. all they want is to be loved back the same way! its really not so much to ask!!!!
ilovetheholylandParticipantmy brother posts occasionally, but i didnt know until i saw his SN here! (he uses the same SN on different blogs…)
ilovetheholylandParticipant“I thought of a suggestion for when someone asks what you’re looking for. You can always say, “If he wants to learn, I’m 100% behind him. If he wants to work, I’m also 100% behind him. I care more about who he is than what he does.”
haifa, thanx a mill! the perfect answer in the perfect amount of words! i guess im just not that articulate, but that really clarifies it. thanx!
ilovetheholylandParticipantgot this last night:
“you just graduated 12th grade right? and you have an older sister who came back from sem last year?” um..actually not, IM the one that is a year outta sem and my sis just graduated high school…
(should i take it as a compliment?)
ilovetheholylandParticipantoomis and yiddeshemishpacha,
I LOVE YOU GUYS!!! thanx for all your words of chizzuk!!! and this is a little embarrassing, but you should just know that many times if im feeling down about my sitch, i’ll reread a “chizzuk response” 🙂 so thanx!
ilovetheholylandParticipantNEVER EVER EVER BORED AT WORK!!!! the day that happens……
ilovetheholylandParticipant“and why would it be a “waste” for you to marry a learning boy if you dont have a preference?”
because i dont have a preferance, ppl feel like they have to “save” the really good learning guys for those who will appreciate it. and if i would even considar a working guy, i must not be able to appreciate a good learner. whatever, idk if im making much sense, just letting off steam…isnt that what this thread is for? 😉
ilovetheholylandParticipanthappy – thanx for the awesome poem!
yening yenta – i couldve written ur post. i feel EXACTLY the same way. but the thing with me is that im not STRICTLY looking for working. im open to either learning OR working. so then people tell me, “well no one is gonna set you up with a serious learning boy if you dont really want one” as if they are not gonna WASTE him on me. the thing is that if he is learning, i want him to learn because that is what he WANTS to do. not because everyone else is doing it, but because he thinks that its the right thing to do. but on the flipside, if he is working and has a strict seder, and is a mentch with good middos, and has all the qualities that will make him be the best husband and father, why is something wrong with that???? (also in my family there are both. learners and earners. and they all live amazing lives b”h). so sometimes i feel like this is an oxymoron. is it???
ilovetheholylandParticipantthanx a lot! any advice of what foods are good AND healthy would be appreciated….
ilovetheholylandParticipant“come one over to the Diabetes support group thread, i think you can find good advice there from us”
i did, and to be honest, it freaked me out. right now im PRE diabetic. what are the chances that it will really STAY that way? i do NOT want to get diabetes!!! like when drs. usually say these things to ppl, do they usually end up getting diabetes?
ilovetheholylandParticipantMAZAl TOV!!! such awesome news!! (i was really to lazy to log in now but when i saw ur news i just HAD to wish u mazal tov!) may you and ur chassan be zoche to build a baayis neeman with everything good!
ilovetheholylandParticipant“Ilove, I think you need to try some other shadchanim.”
yeah, i wish i knew WHO! although im from an AWESOME family, i dont have yichus, although we are comfortable and have what we need, we are not wealthy, and although i may be a pretty girl, im not skinny. so im not really shadchan material….any names of shadchanim who deal with people like me would be welcome 😉
ilovetheholylandParticipantsqueak
i totally hear where your coming from, but dont you think that going to visit these places is in a sense telling the hitler y”s “ha ha, look. you tried wiping us all out and ridding the world of the most beautiful nation. and what are we doing now? thriving! and coming to pray by the graves of our anscestors who you THOUGHT you succeeded with!!!”
thats the real reason why i want to go…
ilovetheholylandParticipantsprint. lg rumor touch.
June 27, 2011 10:31 pm at 10:31 pm in reply to: touring auschwitz, dachau, bergen belsen, etc #781251ilovetheholylandParticipantthanx everyone for ur responses and oppinions!
ilovetheholylandParticipantbecause Hashem doesnt want me to be yet. thats first. but also, im not a size 2. and people just run the other way.
ilovetheholylandParticipant“machshava is a hard subject to master in even a minor way.”
i dont think machshava is something that can ever really be “mastered”. i think it should be taught, it should be learned, and each individual can take what he needs from it according to the level that he is at. its not somthing that you can ever really finish learning.
ilovetheholylandParticipanti think it would depend on the teacher and on the girl. you can have a very passionate teacher teaching in depth to superficial girls and she wont get anywhere. you can also have a teacher barely touching on a subject yet if the girls are deep enough, they will take what they need from it.
June 26, 2011 11:01 pm at 11:01 pm in reply to: Any ideas for a good dinner on a George Forman? #781852ilovetheholylandParticipantmarinate veggies and grill em! tasty and healthy!
ilovetheholylandParticipantFIJI!!! love it and get it all the time. what do you think about bikeride from essie? is it like very little girlish?
ilovetheholylandParticipantmost girls high schools that i know of have machshava classes.
June 26, 2011 10:09 pm at 10:09 pm in reply to: The next Generation is here…with more chutzpah than ever! #781371ilovetheholylandParticipanti CONSTANTLY tell my mother how much i appreciate the way she raised me. i look at some of my friends and the way some of their mothers act with them and im floored! MOTHERS ARE NOT BEST FRIENDS!!!! unfortunately in todays day and age many people behave as if they are…
on the other hand, i recently had a discussion with my mother and i told her that when i i”h raise my own kids, there are some things that i would like to do differently then she did with me. she asked me what i meant, and i gave her a few examples. its not to say that i dont like what she did, just that in my home i”h i would want things a little different. she was totally fine with it.
your daughter may be appreciative of the things you did for her but just wanna do things differently in her own home.
June 26, 2011 10:01 pm at 10:01 pm in reply to: touring auschwitz, dachau, bergen belsen, etc #781244ilovetheholylandParticipantso you didnt get any holocaust appreciation from your tour? like, if i wanna really know and see what went on, would i be better off going to a holocaust museum and reading some books?
ilovetheholylandParticipanta coupla weeks ago i was on my way home from work and i needed to stop at the grocery for a minute. well, the car i parked next to was off, windows were open a little, and there were TWO kids in the car. TWO. and this was no mistake. this was intentional. there was a sleeping baby whos face was so red and flushed and sweaty, he looked like he would dehydrate any second if he wasnt already dehydrated, and there was an older child, about 4 years old who was awake, “watching” the baby. i was so livid, i stayed outside my car for a good 15 minutes watching the kids until the father came outside from doing his shopping. i didnt have the guts to say anything to him though…too bad.
ilovetheholylandParticipant“Can I have a better one?”
real brisker, before you ask for a better one, have pity on those of us who dont have ANY yet and cant think of “the perfect one…”
(mods, this IS a hint!)
June 23, 2011 9:01 pm at 9:01 pm in reply to: What is there for a family to do at Lake George, NY? #779915ilovetheholylandParticipant1)funspot – lasertag, rollerskating, go carting.
2)white water rafting – i went to a place called hudson river rafting
3)frankenstiens house of wax – scary for little kids
4)crandel park – perfect place for a picnic or just to chill
5)prospect mountain – really gorgeous views from the top
its really fun to also browse the village there, tons of gift shops.
ilovetheholylandParticipanti can only say that i think many people dont even know themselves what they want. i think they just hear what everybody else says, and they automatically want that. people dont realize that they have to really know themselves before they can start dating.
ilovetheholylandParticipanti love Eretz Yisrael and i feel a deep connection to it.
ilovetheholylandParticipant“…we ended up getting a Honda Oddyssey…”
shocking! you must be jewish! 🙂
ilovetheholylandParticipantrivky –
im assuming u mixed me up with toomuch00. i mean, u sound like a really nice girl and it would be an honor to know you, but i dont think i do…..
ilovetheholylandParticipant“some of them actually look like cavemen”
this guy i met certainly looked like a caveman! hes a freaken genious also….a really interesting guy. maybe hes ur friend!
ilovetheholylandParticipantposter – thanx. the names “sheyan” and “kiyara” totally slipped my mind and it was getting frustrating…
rivky – just walk down malchai yisrael/meah shearim. practically every other store has leather siddurim! and while ur there, make sure to go to ZISALEK!
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