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Many people, besides saying “Hamakom Yenacheim” add on in yiddish “zahl du mehr nisht vissin fuhn kein tzahr, nar fuhn simchos”. Loosely translated, “you should know not further know from any “pain”, only from happy occasions” (as taught to me by my grandparents). Since Mrs. CTL does not know yiddish and it is more than 30 days after the petirah so “Hamakom Yenacheim” is not said, I gave her the yiddish saying. My aunt always tells me that “simchos” should be “smachot”.
T22T: First, I don’t know what the rules were in Slodbaka as to whether they had the same laws as the USA. Second, once the “Alter” was informed by R’ Aharon what was in the letters, R’ Reuvain was told to intercept any further letters, not read them. Three, after 120, you can go and ask the Alter from Slodbaka. Until then….
First..I wish tMrs. CTL (and the rest of the CTL Mishpacha) a “nechomah” upon the petirah of her mother. May she know of no more “tzahr” only smachot.
Second: To question #2…IMHO, since the nifteres chose the place for her burial, it would seem that she may not have wanted the other stone inscribed. As to question #1, if one of your children or grandchildren would want to name their child after her, would they use the Hebrew name or the Yiddish name? If the answer is the Hebrew name, then I would suggest putting the Hebrew name on the matzeivah.
There is no issur that I know of since robocalls for charitable organizations are exempt from “The Do Not Call” list. However, I too am annoyed by these calls and I hope that the organizations end this practice. One method might be that if you receive a robocall and a mailing from the same organization you can send back the envelope with a note stating “I received a robocall from your organization. I do not donate to organizations that resort to robocalls”.
thinker123: What does “karg” mean? I am also not sure what you mean by “not nice” especially with tefillin. I have had my tefillin checked a number of times since my bar-mitzvah, including the retzuos, and was never told that they were pasul or not mehudar. 3 or 4 years ago I noticed that the retzuos of my shel rosh was cracking and was told to replace them. I was told that my retzuos of the shel yad were kosher and just needed “blackening”. As for my tallis, i have replaced both my weekday and shabbos tallis twice since getting married.
Joseph: The sofer kept the retzuos so I do not know what he actually did with them but I would think they are shaimos. I still have the old talleisim.
GH: Nice synopsis.
My personal experience:
My original retzuos lasted almost 40 years before they had to be replaced. If there are cracks or they start to shrivel they should be checked by a sofer.
Talis – Shabbos tallis –if taken care of properly 20 -25 years. Weekday tallis 10 – 15 years.
those who are slain by a [Gentile] Government
Sometimes I wonder…..oh well. No there is no difference. A sheitel is a wig and a wig is a sheitel. The only context is yiddish / english.
I don’t live in Lakewood so I have nothing to say.
Joseph: I respectfully request that you put the “footnote” as a “header” so we know it’s not really your own question but a quote from Rav Miller.
Thank you.
Went to the 5 towns instead to celebrate a birthday. Sorry.
If you read biographies of gedolim, you will hear stories of how they were raised. Their parents didn’t know they would be a raising a “godol hador” but raised them with a deep appreciation for limod hatorah and a deep sense of being a “yorei shamayim”. It has been reported that Rebbetzin Karelitz (mother of the Chazon Ish) put yarmulkes on her sons from 8 days old and washed neigel vasser with them from the time they were 30 days old. They also say that she was makpid that the walls of her house not see her hair and would wash her hair for shabbos with others holding towels above her head.
I heard in the name of R’ Moshe that when he was 9 or 10, he learned the entire Mesechta Beitzah with his father on Shavuous and felt he had a very deep understanding of muktzeh from that learning.
On the other hand, R’ Yaakov Kaminetsky when learning in Sladboka brought home a younger talmid and when R’ Yaakov’s mother saw the boy asked “Who is he? The shechina is shining from his face”. The Bochur? R’ Aharon Kotler (who was a teenager at the time).
It is a well known story that R’ Aharon’s family kept writing letters to him telling him to leave the Yeshiva and go to University and study math. The Alter had Reb Reuvain Grozovsky intercept the letters.
joseph: Again, you are taking my examples and declaring the position of ONE of the spouses demanding the divorce when faced with adversity and the other spouse either not consenting or unable to consent. I am NOT talking about that type of situation. I am talking about where the couple, facing trying circumstances that have affected their marriage and not caused by a mistake of either spouse, and have been to a Rav and whatever counseling demanded by their state or country of residence.
As for how to achieve SHLOM BAYIS, I heard that R’ Chaim Ozer was asked about this and he answered that when he was married he and his wife divided the household responsibilities: he would handle all the ruchniyos decisions and his wife would handle all the gashmiyus decisions. He did not recall a time that either one of them violated this agreement.
joseph: Is it poor form or morals that one spouse cannot deal with the physical or emotional issue that the other spouse faces or even the financial issues that happens during the marriage? It may be but many of us have friends or relatives where this happened. Let’s try to talk in reality and not the “nirvana” that everyone wants to live in. We generally do not enter into marriage with thoughts of divorce. However, the OP and others keep talking about “mistakes” the spouses make and how to avoid them. Divorces can happen without either spouse making a mistake. If one wants to enter marriage without taking that into consideration they IMHO are doing themselves a disservice.
GH: Are you saying that my responses are not “intelligent”? I know that am not the “sharpest knife in the drawer but I am also not the dullest”. =D
Norene Gilletz (she is lives in Canada and has written a number of cookbooks) may be able to help you with what could be substituted for eggs, nuts and seeds in a recipe. Her website “gourmania” has her contact information.
CTL: Thanks for posting the recipe from your niece.
gotrump: Thanks for shouting but we are not the goyim with the “death do us part” as part of the wedding vows. Again, a husband and wife could avoid mistakes but unforeseen circumstances could cause issues that could lead to a divorce and that includes health and wealth. Don’t be so naive.
joseph: I see that the word “anyone” was a bad choice of words. It should have said “any couple has a right to a divorce”. I agree that a husband cannot give a “get” if the wife refuses to accept it and the husband cannot be forced without halachic cause to give one. My point was supposed be that divorces are not only caused by one of the parties making a mistake. Things happen that are unforeseen at the time of the shidduch/marriage that may have an effect. Also, while you are talking about a halachic divorce, a civil divorce can still be obtained. I do believe that in New York, the court needs to be advised when the “get” will be issued.
Fool me once shame on me, fool me twice shame on you……If you trust an Amazon employee that you don’t know….
joseph: The right to divorce? Anyone has the right to divorce. You don’t need a halachic reason although their are halchachic reasons when a divorce is commanded.
As for my scenario above. The couple discusses the situation with a Rav. The therapist is given written permission to discuss their patient with the Rav. Upon hearing everything the Rav decides divorce is the best road. Don’t tell me that the couple does not have the right to divorce.
IMHO, divorce can also happen without “major mistakes”. A person can develop a mental illness (e.g. depression) or physical illness and even with therapy the spouse has a hard time dealing with it.
Avram in MD: You are correct. Rabbi Dubov of Maitland, FL told me that they approached some farms as the milk they were receiving from the Northeast had a short shelf life.
ZD: See the Mishna Berurah 62:2 SK 3. Min hadin one can daven in any language but the mitzvah min hamuvchar is to daven in Loshon Hakodesh. However, in our times even mitzad hadin one should be mindful should not daven in any language but loshon hakodesh as many words cannot be translated well….
http://hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?req=49623&st=&pgnum=188
ctl: I took the question from the OP as the men were totally bareheaded; no hats or caps. I also remember a story about a lawyer who came into shul and started davening without a hat or cap. His fellow mispallelim were startled. He couldn’t figure out what was wrong until he realized that he was wearing his toupee, which he wore because they did not allow him to wear a kippah in the office.
DY: Even though I showed the words, I stated in english the only difference was the ches and chaf. Actually one has a “SIN” and the other a “SAMACH”.
My answer above is misleading. Simcha is from the shoresh SIN MEM CHES as in שָׂמֵֽחַ and the spelling is שִׂמְחָ֥ה.
Smicha comes from the shoresh of SAMACH MEM CHAF as in וְסָמַ֣ךְ. The first time we see someone receive “smicha” is Yehoshua from Moshe (Bamidbar 27: 23): וַיִּסְמֹ֧ךְ אֶת־יָדָ֛יו עָלָ֖יו וַיְצַוֵּ֑הוּ. I believe that YU on their CHAG HASMICHAH invitations spells it SAMACH MEM YUD CHAF HAY.
Joseph: I agree but with a caveat. Sephardim generally wear a kippah for davening and eating (from what I recall they are strict to wear a kippah when making brachot).
GH: I grew up in a Young Israel shul where many members were not observant and we needed to keep both kippot and talleisim in the hallway of the shul. As you stated, I never recall anybody being criticized for not having their own kippah or tallis.
To answer the OP, I stated they are likely less observant then those who always come to shul but out of respect (as T22T commented) will wear it for religious functions inside of a shul. The OP use of the word “minhag” is inappropriate for this situation.
It’s not a minhag. They are usually people who are not “observant”.
Depends why you are wearing it. I have heard that there are those who allow a man to wear a wedding band since it signals to others(especially non-jews) that you are married and should not be approached.
No. Simcha is spelled with a ches; smicha with a chaf.
וְהָיִ֖יתָ אַ֥ךְ שָׂמֵֽחַ
וְסָמַ֣ךְ יָד֔וֹ
Meno: We found that cutting out the “family mi shehbeyrach’s” curtailed the talking “bein gavra l’gavra”and led to better decorum, overall.
justasec: You wrote: “Then if you have those 2 also, you will have a successful marriage.”
I am sorry but middos tovos and yiras shamayim are not the only 2 ingredients to make a successful marriage. The most important 2? Probably but not the only 2.
To answer your question, maybe. If I go do you ant me to pick something up for you?
Shabbos davening in my shul averages 2 hours including the 10 – 15 minutes for the Rov’s drasha. We only recite a Mi Shehbeyrach for the “oleh aliya”.
One thing that can’t totally be controlled is “the leining is very slow”. A baal koreh can try to speed but if he is swallowing words or reading words baal peh to increase his speed nobody is yotzeh. I agree that some baalei kriah are “agonizingly slow”. However, I would like to give an analogy. You are driving and someone in the car is being a backseat driver: “slow down, speed up”. Do you listen or ignore it? As a bal koreh, I ignore such messages. I am in the driver’s seat and I can go as fast or as slow as I please, as long as the Rav and the gaboim are satisfied with my speed. One cannot lein the parsha like he his reading the names of the 10 sons of Haman.
Joseph: I have both CS and CY milk in my house, stored the same way and the CS milk is still good 3 – 4 days AFTER th last date of sale. That NEVER happens with any brand of CY milk.
gilda: Yes, there are an abundance of products, but not always the same quality.
and your point is?
GH: I don’t know of any of the owners who are complaining about the common name that a din torah is necessary.
southside: You wrote “Please confirm if this is true and if it applies to all locations of the above list…”. Since you are bumping a thread that is over a year old…who are you expecting to confirm this information? We are not a Kashrus organization. Please do your own research.
The original name of the one in Manhattan and Brooklyn was the full name Jerusalem II. Colloquially it became known as “J2”. I doubt highly that name was ever “trademarked” or “copyrighted” and therefore others used that name in other places.
Are you sure it is JII and not JIII? At one time the JII on Ave. J between E.13th and E.14th was related to the one on Ave. M and E.15 and the one in Manhattan; hence the same names.
it depends. Sometimes yes and sometimes no. Depends how well the salt is washed away during the kashering process.
Unfortunately there is no “perfect” prevention. Unforeseen events will have impacts that cannot be predicted during the dating (“shidduch”) process. The best advise is to daven, daven, daven.
Do you know that the bureau of incomplete statistics state that 4 out of 5…
rebyidd23: Are you sure? I’ve seen many of the responses on this website….not really sure if it’s English (or American).
Reminds me of the toilet seat debate. Look before you type!
A person needed to undergo surgery for a type of cancer. Two surgeons were suggested by his physician and he personally suggested Dr. “A”. The person conferred with an oncologist who told him that he should use Dr. “B” and would never send a patient to Dr. “A”. Not sure what to do he went to Rav Pam and asked which surgeon he should use. Rav Pam’s advice? Since the oncologist sees the patient after surgery he is the judge as to who is the better surgeon. Therefore he advised the person to use Dr. “B”.
DovidBT: Why can’t Rav A and Rav B discuss their differences and find a common halachic conclusion that’s mutually acceptable?
Because that is not the way halachah is decided when their is a machlokes between gedolim of the previous generation.
Let’s use the following example. Friday night, do you stand or sit for kiddush? See the Aruch Hashulchan Orech Chaim 271:24 .The Rambam holds one sits. The Arizal holds one stands.
http://hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?req=9101&st=&pgnum=94
The Shulchan Aruch 271:10 states that “V’OMER VAYECHULU MEUMAD VACHAR KACH OMER BOREI PRI HAGAFEN VACHAR KACH KIDDUSH. The RAMAH adds VEYACHOL LA’AMOD BSHAS KIDDUSH VEYOSER TOV LEYASHEIV
.http://hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?req=49625&st=&pgnum=94
So if you ask two LOR’s what to do, you will probably get two different answers. According to you, the two should get together and to a conclusion that is mutually acceptable. That though is not the case.I don’t have to agree with the decision of another LOR if he is basing his psak on the Ramah while the other LOR follows the Arizal.
DovidBT: Since there are certain materials that are used today that were not used 100 years ago and are questionable to some authorities if they require tzitzis or not. We have minimum standards….everyone agrees that wool begadim need tzitzes. Many stores sell “mesh” tzitzes. Not everyone agrees that this type of beged requires tzitzes….hence ask your LOR whether he allows it or not.
There is no question that is too small or too big for your LOR unless he tells you to otherwise. Many years ago, one of my children had a deep cut that a doctor in shul determined that stitches were required. I asked the Rav about walking to the hospital or being driven by a non-jew. His answer to me was you know the halachah. My response was that I was asking him as he was the LOR and had smicha and was able to pasken for me.
justsmile613: Refuah Shelaimah
tlik: If you notice I didn’t question what you said or your interpretations of the seforim you mentioned above. I misread what you wrote which was “חושך שבטו is the basis for any discussion about corporal punishment. That is a posuk in Mishlei. Can you finish that posuk without looking it up? Most mechanchim and menahalim can’t either. Let’s just stare at this first half of the posuk for a moment. Does it suggest hitting? That, my friend, is actually מגלה פנים בתורה שלא כהלכה.” I didn’t realize you were now quoting from Pirkei Avos.
I find that they taste differently.
Here’s the list of ingredients in Coke Zero Sugar:
Carbonated water, caramel color, phosphoric acid, aspartame, potassium benzoate, natural flavors, potassium citrate, acesulfame potassium, caffeine,
Diet Coke is missing two ingredients listed above: potassium citrate and acesulfame potassium. Acesulfame potassium is a calorie-free sugar substitute and potassium citrate is a common additive in beverages.