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Havesomeseiche-
There are other factors as well, such as planetary alignment, but the effect of other planets on our tides is very minor.
“Everything that can be invented has been invented.”
-Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. patent office, 1899 (proposing that the patent office be disbanded).
“I’m glad I’m not Brezhnev. Being the Russian leader in the Kremlin, you never know if someone’s tape-recording what you say”.
– Richard M. Nixon
“How about this for a headline for tomorrow’s paper? French fries.”
-James French (executed in the electric chair)
“I am loyal to my employer at all costs… please feel free to respond to my resume on my office voice mail.”
-On a cover letter
“Anything is possible if you don’t know what you’re talking about”.
-Green’s law of debate (hmmm… was Green a YW moderator?)
“Smile. Tomorrow will be worse.”
-Murphy’s philosophy
Joseph-
Thank you for your kind words.
My intention here is to defend an fine Bais Yakov that (for whatever reason) another poster is trying to do a hatchet job on, with distortions, inuendo, and outright untruths.
I feel responsible for doing so since it was my mention of the school in the first place that attracted the dishonest postings.
The “emes” part was my intention, but the kavod haTorah truthfully didn’t cross my mind (although in retrospect I agree that it applies to a Yeshiva or Bais Yakov).
Thanks as well for your assistance in the “Mishnayos” thread – I didn’t want to clutter that one up with extraneous comments.
jphone-
Your original post was quite clear in its intent.
Thank you for ensuring that no one else might misunderstand it.
The smoker who’s hopelessly hooked to his three-pack-a-day habbit started with a single cigarette.
Several of my classmates who ended up with the dangerous, expensive and smelly addiction started on Purim and/or to be “cool”.
If you never take that first puff, you will never be a smoker.
Many people will reject a shidduch with a smoker.
Your insurance premiums will be significantly higher.
Please – don’t start, even once, even on Purim.
The slanderous campaign of motzei shem rah (loshon hora, minus any truthfulness) that Moshejoe is waging against a fine Bais Yakov continues.
If you have shaiches to a school, you are not believable if you say anything positive about it.
Shaiches means:
Parents of students (past and present).
Siblings of students (past and present).
Grandparents of students (past and present).
Students themselves (past and present).
Teachers (past and present).
Rabeim (past and present).
Administrators (past and present).
Maintenance personnel (past and present).
Bus drivers (past and present).
Children of, grandchildren of, parents of, siblings of and spouses of teachers (past and present).
Children of, grandchildren of, parents of, siblings of and spouses of Rabeim (past and present).
Children of, grandchildren of, parents of, siblings of and spouses of Administrators (past and present).
Children of, grandchildren of, parents of, siblings of and spouses of Rabeim (past and present).
We can all see his agenda.
I neither know, nor am interested in, the reason for his vendetta.
If anyone is learning shmiras haloshon or hilchos loshon horah and needs a textbook example of motzei shem ra, by all means print out his posts.
Since it is for tachlis reasons, the offer extended by my wife and me to be contacted by Mommyoftwo stands.
B”H I have completed Bava Kama.
Please put me down for Bava Basra, bli neder.
There have been dozens of new posters (and even non-registrants) who joined solely for the purpose of learning mishnayos – yasher koachachem for the chizuk.
Has any thought been given to the logistics of siyum(im)?
Can completed mesechtos be tracked and indicated as “complete”?
May I propose mdlevine (the originator of of this thread) as a misayim?
Water, Water Everywhere: Answer
At the very beginning/end and in the very middle of the Hebrew month, right at chatzos (either day or night).
These are the times that the sun, earth, and moon most closely line up in a straight line, so the gravitational pulls of the sun and the moon work together to cause high tide.
What a kidush H-shem!
I can’t help contrasting the frenzied shopping hordes of Black Friday chapping flat-panel TVs vs. the the way varied and sundry posters and readers snapped up the mesechtos thruout the last two days, and thinking “Anu ratzim vehaim ratzim…”
Moderator-
A suggestion: when a duplicate request comes in, perhaps post underneath the later request something like “Mesechta already taken – please choose another” in bold lettering.
Tizku lemitzvos to YWN, MDLevine and all participants.
Thank you for your suggestion. We are currently in middle of doing that. Please standby.
My son (over bar mitzva) will learn Makos, bli neder.
??? ?????? ??? ??? ?????? ???? ???? ????? ????? ???? ???? ???
??????? ????
Water, Water Everywhere
Yankel, a U.S. Army Corps of Engineers employee, was assigned the task of reconstructing the New Orleans levees.
On what Hebrew calendar date(s) should Yankel take his measurements?
Why?
Time and Again solution:
1) 5 (that I came up with)
3)
Happy New Year:
jewishfeminist02-
not bad at all
Dr. Pepper-
Correct!
mdlevine-
Tizku lemitzvos.
Bli Neder, Bava Kama.
B”H R’ Gavriel Noach was able to be mikayim one last chesed for his aishes chayil – kavod hames.
H-shem Yikom Damam.
jewishfeminist02-
So far you’re doing well – keep going.
The carat character (^) is Shift+6 on most fonts. Alternately you can use the character map utility (on a windows pc).
(please take a few moments to say some tehilim for those in Mumbai)
I would not have posted here at this time if I had read of the situation in Mubai beforehand. Please take a few moments to say some tehilim.
How many ICOTs does it take to change a light bulb?
None – We can only try
How many gorillas does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but a lot of light bulbs.
How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but the bulb needs to really want to change.
They knew it would need to be changed.
How many fortune-tellers does it take to change a light bulb?
How many yekkes does it take to change a light bulb?
1.00000000
How many TWU union members does it take to change a light bulb?
None. That’s the electrician’s job.
How many YWN posters does it take to change a light bulb?
1) It depends how long the “How to change a light bulb” thread takes to get approved.
2) Is it tzniusdik to change a light bulb?
3) Make sure the light bulb has the correct hashgocha.
A boss and three employees were hiking in the woods and got lost.
They only had enough provisions for three people.
The boss said “To be equitable, I’ll ask three questions on the same subject. If each of you gets one right, I’ll go hungry. Otherwise, the person who misses his question does”.
The employees agreed.
“Ok,” said the boss, “which large ship struck an iceberg in 1912 and sank?”
“The Titanic” answered the first employee.
“Fine,” said the boss, “Next question – how many people were lost?”
“1,500” replied the second employee.
“Correct” said the boss.
He turned to the third employee “Now for your question – what were their names?”
Time and Again
There are two fuses glued to a concrete floor.
Each fuse will burn for exactly an hour.
You have one box of 100 matches.
1) How many different time intervals would you be able to accurately measure using the fuses and matches you were given?
2) What are the intervals?
3) How would you measure each of the intervals?
(each solution starts with two new fuses.)
Happy New Year
Using only the digits in the upcoming secular year (2 0 0 9) in their proper order come up with an equation that totals each number from 1 thru 10. Any mathematical expression and decimal points are allowed.
To get you started:
_
9 can’t be written with this font, so just use .9E(ndless) instead
5 = (2+0+0)+?9
(from a game magazine)
Nobody-
I never would have gotten it.
My next guess was going to be a “kick me” sign.
Dr. Pepper-
Some of us (me) had real problems with high school math.
I think you were (are?) a very good teacher because you are an excellent bal masbir.
Never having heard of Cramer’s Rule, I looked it up. In the case of
2x + y + z = 3
x + 2y + z = 0
I understand it except for this part:
|2 1 1|
D = | 1 -1 -1| = (-2)+(-1)+(2)
|1 2 1| -(-1)-(-4)-(1)=3
Where do the numbers used in “(-2)+(-1)+(2)-(-1)-(-4)-(1)” come from? (If this is an unreasonable question to ask “al regel achas”, please let me know – I don’t want to be an advantagist).
“Reb” can also stand for Rebetzin, which I assume is what you meant when addressing “anon for this”.
Nobody-
Engineered viruses, produced by a terrorist group?
(probably not, too klugey)
jewishfeminist02-
Shabbos is one of the most precious commodities we have.
Its value exceeds what the richest person on earth posesses.
For Bill Gates’s entire fortune – wealth beyond his wildest dreams for himself and future generations – the average Shomer Shabbos Jew would not strike a single match on Shabbos.
We unfortunately can’t change the world, and few of us are talented and dedicated enough to influence even a single person, but we must never be blase or accepting of chilul Shabbos.
The other issues discussed here are pittances compared to Shabbos. If not for a single instance of chilul Shabbos in the midbar, Moshiach would have been here thousands of years ago.
It is in many cases good to be open-minded, libertarian, and see things from others’ perspective. Shabbos is not one of them. Realizing that we can’t change people who are mechalel Shabbos doesn’t mean that we should accept with equanimity their chilul Shabbos.
The Queen of Persia-
Here’s a GPS on sale for a low price that’s loaded with features:
http://www.buy.com/retail/product.asp?sku=208429765
Pros: lots of features, including subscription-free real-time traffic, spoken street names, almost all buyers highly rated it.
Cons: refurb, only 90-day warranty, don’t know how good a name-brand Navigon is (my ignorance).
squeak-
I came up with eight, based on the following:
There are at least six separate people here (the children).
The relationships described are with each other (otherwise there would be at least six grandchildren).
Generation 1: Avrohom, a widower and Sorah, a widow
Generation 2: Yitzchok, Avrohom’s son who marries Rivka, Sorah’s daughter
Generation 3: Reuven, Shimon, Dina and Yehudis – Yitzchok and Rivka’s children.
a) one grandfather, one grandmother: Avrohom and Sorah
b) two fathers, two mothers: Avrohom, Yitzchok, Sorah and Rivka
c) six children: Yitzchok, Rivka, Reuven, Shimon, Dina and Yehudis
d) four grandchildren: Reuven, Shimon, Dina and Yehudis
e) two brothers: Reuven, Shimon
f) two sisters: Dina, Yehudis
g) three sons: Yitzchok, Reuven, Shimon
h) three daughters: Rivka, Dina, Yehudis
i) one father-in-law: Avrohom
j) one mother-in-law: Sorah
k) one daughter-in-law: Rivka
(this may be wrong, because by this cheshbon there should also be one son-in-law)
OK er.. ok
…so old I can tell you what dodo tasted like. It tasted like passenger pigeon.
…so old I remember when the man in the moon was a boy
…so old my first pair of tefilin was made from dinosaur hide
…so old I gave the big dipper a mazel tov when his little brother was born
“I can only try – you seem to have given up”
-Given up? Moi? Never! “We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender.”
(hmmm… maybe this belongs in the “quotes” thread)
squeak-
Both correct!
(c’mon now, you knew the “Bigger” one previously, didn’t you?)
bored@work-
You don’t seem “plain stupid” in the least.
You appear to be a baales chesed to a commendable degree.
Forgive me if I worded my thoughts in an overly strong manner, but I was expressing concern about the potential risk.
As is often the case with us older folk, when I was a young bochur I did not always practice what I now preach, and often gave lifts to frum people in Flatbush, Boro Park and the mountains. B”H there were never any problems, and the overwhelming likelihood is that you wouldn’t ever have any either. Nonetheless, it is important to recognize that that risk exists.
With the (hopefully) added wisdom of years, I am now saying what I suppose my parents would have said to me.
Also, there is clearly a difference between a woman giving a lift to other women or girls, or giving a ride to a man.
Of course that is not to say that no one should ever be offered a lift – a few years back my wife picked up a frum man who was being pursued by a group of shachorim.
My opinion on this is not halacha-based at all, but rather on keeping onseself safe – you may want to ask your parents their thoughts, rather than a rav.
The Big Question
The Bigger family consists of Father Bigger, Mother Bigger and Baby Bigger.
Father Bigger is two meters tall and weighs 15 stone.
Mother Bigger is 1/900 of a mile tall and weighs 54 kilo.
Baby Bigger is .7 yards tall and weighs 201 ounces.
Who is the biggest Bigger?
Oops!
Their are three errers in this item.
Study it carefully and see if you can find all three of them.
bored@work-
“U may think I am crazy but I feel if i want to do something good H-shem will help.”
A couple of years ago there were a two women in Williamsburg who were given rides by a chasidish-looking man who then attacked them.
In Eretz Yisroel, Arab terrorists sometimes get dressed as frum people – sometimes as chasidim – to lure victimes.
We have all heard of stories – possibly urban legends – about nochrim who travel in the catskills with a yarmulka because they know that free roadside assistance is available if they put it on.
I once had a couple of young frum boys, about 11 or 12, approach me while I was fueling at a gas station and ask for a ride. I gave them a quarter (I didn’t have a cell phone) and told them to call their parents and get their OK before I would do so, because 1) I wanted their parents to know that they approached a stranger for a ride and 2) I would not give them a ride without their parent’s haskama.
I implore you in the strongest possible terms NOT to give rides to people you don’t know.
Unless you know me…
-If you see me standing and waiting at a bus stop, please pass me by.
-If you see my children waiting at a city bus stop you do NOT have my permission to offer them a ride.
Chas v’sholom that with your good-hearted intentions you are taken advantage of by an evil individual in a way that can cause you and your family anguish for years to come.
…you sign your screen name at the bottom of a check
…you hear a good joke and audibly respond “LOL” instead of actually laughing
…you stay late at work to make up for all the time spent reading posts (true)
…when asked your name, it takes a minute to remember your real name instead of your screen name
…the sound that immediately follows havdala is the “click” of your computer’s switch as you check the latest posts
…six hours before havdala, you think “if I were in Israel, I could be posting”
…YWN is your homepage
…when you refer to certain names in conversation, no explanation is needed
…the only words that get you to shut down the computer are “I’m lighting candles”
…you won’t eat before davening, but you will check the latest posts
…you spend time responding to silly threads
anon for this-
feivel-
Correct!
Water’s temperature can only rise to the point where it becomes steam.
The greater the atmospheric pressure on the water’s surface, the hotter the water must be in order to change from a liquid to a gaseous state.
Compressing any gas sufficiently turns it into a liquid, be it oxygen, nitrogen, or water vapor.
The way a pressure cooker works is that by raising the pressure inside the pot it allows the water to reach a higher temperature and cook the food more quickly.
Conversely, lowering pressure lowers the boiling point as well.
Room-temperature water would boil away in a vacuum.
As Feivel pointed out, Denver would be a possible destination of Yankel’s since it has both a frum community and a high altitude (there is a marker on the capitol’s steps denoting exactly one mile above sea level).
Mexico City is another possibility that I can think of that has both of the above factors.
(I’m pretty sure Nepal doesn’t have a frum community)
You’ll be happy to know that by day 2, Yankel had adjusted the cooking time and was enjoying his customary gourmet breakfast.
Feivel- we miss your puzzles, especially since (I think) your halacha riddles inspired this thread.
I’m so disappointed!
I thought this thread’s title was “Traffic Agents Becoming Extinct”
havesomeseichel-
I too got a 99, but only when totaling two separate tests.
Dr. Pepper
Correct!
(at terms end, once the teacher passed Gauss, would you say his class was degaussed?)
Hard-Boiled Detection
Leah’s four sons were leaving home and moving to different cities.
Since they each enjoyed a hard-boiled egg for breakfast, the asked their mother for the recipe before they left.
On the first day following their move, Leah called them all to find out how things were going.
Reuven said “fine”.
Shimon said “great”.
Chaim said “fantastic”.
Yankel said “Could be better. My egg wasn’t fully cooked.”
Assuming all four followed Leah’s instructions verbatim, why was Yankel’s egg ruined?
The Frustrated Teacher
The fifth-grade math teacher wasn’t in the mood to give his planned lesson.
The class was in a restless mood and he just didn’t have the energy to to teach the prepared material and enforce discipline.
He decided to give himself a break by giving the class an exercise that would take up the entire scheduled hour, but would only take him a minute to assign and explain.
The problem he devised was simple – the students were to add every whole number from 1 thru 100.
About five minutes later, the teacher was sitting at his desk, mentally patting himself on the back for his ingenuity. Most of the students were sitting at their desks, deep in thought. A couple of the slower writers were still writing numbers on their papers.
One of the brighter boys raised his hand.
The teacher frowned in mild annoyance at the interruption of his “free” period.
“Yes?” he called on the student “do you need help?”
“No,” replied the student, “I finished, and the answer is …..”.
The teacher was shocked. “How did you add up all the numbers so quickly?”
The student expalined the simple but brilliant method he had used.
The teacher groaned to himself as he got up and walked to the blackboard.
He now had fifty minutes of class to teach.
1) What was the answer?
2) What was the student’s “trick”?
(I am sure this is an oldie, since I remember it from an SRA. If you already know the answer, “chap nischt”. If you know what an SRA was, you too may be an oldie:))
The Queen of Persia-
First the good news:
The features that you are looking for are very basic (except if you decide to go for real-time traffic) and should come in at well under your budgeted amount. Pretty much any GPS sold will do what you are asking for.
Now, the less good news:
I don’t know GPS models. Garmin and Magellan are the two biggest brands,and I they both make models that get good ratings. I personally got a very basic unit on sale over a year ago for $175, and they’ve come down quite a bit since then.
Your requirements of “SIMPLE, CLEAR & DEPENDABLE” make sense, and I would add audible in a relatively noisy car (if you have kids I need say no more), and easy to put in a purse or briefcase (to avoid theft).
I would use word-of-mouth from recent buyers, as well as online reviews in determining which model to get.
I can ask a couple of people who bought a GPS around Pesach-time and are happy with it what model they have, but that info is likely already outdated.
Any and all posters and lurkers who’ve recently purchased a GPS – here’s your opportunity to be helpful.
Here’s an idea –
How about if we use this thread to help each other find this week?
For example,
“Looking for a sale on the fuji f50 – please post info with ‘ICOT’ in the first line if you see anything.”
or
“Looking for a sale on any GPS less than $120 – please post info with ‘ICOT’ in the first line if you see anything.”
(No, I’m not looking for anything. Also, don’t do this as a substitute of your own research – that’s taking advantage of the good nature of others.)
Opinions?
dunno-
Here’s one: blackfridayhome.com
Year-around bargain-hunter sites, which will (I’m sure) also have BF info as the week progresses:
SJSinNYC mentioned one I’m not familiar with: slickdeals.net
Joseph brought up another point – the Monday following Thanksgiving is called “Cyber Monday” with many online specials available (largely electronics)
Googling “black friday” ads results in over twenty million hits, so this is just to get you started.
Info is updated on these sites as we get closer to Friday.
noitallmr-
This is very likely not nogeiah to you, but in the States many yeshivos are banning all cell phones except the “kosher phone”, which has no internet, photo or texting capability.
Some parents have gotten burned because they got their kids a phone, and then the phone couldn’t be teken to yeshiva.
On to your question…
I don’t have one myself, but my neighbor at work does, and he loves it.
It is a high-quality phone, music player, camera, and video player (he uses an Apple application to load videos).
It is also an internet appliance.
If you like tech toys, this is a very nice one.
A Few Black Friday Tips:
1) Plan ahead! Find out what’s on sale, at what times, and if you can buy it online. Different stores have different policies and sale-times.
2) Shop for a need – don’t go wild getting unnecessary stuff just because it’s on sale.
3) Read reviews both from pros and from average folks. All cameras, PCs, etc. are not created equal. There is much more to electronics than megapixels, megabytes and so forth.
4) If you’re planning on getting electronics, toys, or other pricey stuff for Chanuka gifts, you may want to buy it now.
5) A GPS makes a great gift for someone who doesn’t have one (and isn’t a complete technophobe).
Dr. Pepper-
Pick the one that you like best (if any):
1) Sorry Dr., but that answer grades “incomplete”
2) Now say that ten times fast
3) I’m NOT chipping in to replace your worn-out keyboard
4) I think the eleventh zero on line 5071 should be a nine. Please double check.
5) Anybody could’ve done that. Let’s see you say it backwards.
6) This actually makes more sense than most extra-long posts.
7) YWN’s server now needs a new batch of 0’s and 1’s delivered.
(Did you ever read “The Code Book”? I think you’d enjoy it.)
havesomeseichel-
22/7 is a very close approximation, but it’s not correct.
Dr. Pepper-
Correct!
OK, for your next assignment, list all remaining digits of this well-known geometric number: 3.14159….
What’s Next?
(this one is a little obscure, and is math-based)
6,7,6
3,9,9
4,5,2
8,2,?