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Charlie – “It means you blame robbery victims for being robbed.”
Rubbish – It’s the unions who are the biggest theives.
“No, the recession ended in June 2009. Do you even know what the definition of a recession is?”
Yup, it’s definitely over. Obama has created a depression. He angered the moderate Arabs, so Saudi Arabia won’t fill in for lack of Libyan oil. Soon you won’t be able to afford to buy bread. Also, he has created so many jobs with his economic stimulus package, that there is only 10% unemployment. BTW, there was even less of a % when Bush was in office – the creator of our recession. But Obama has taken us out of the recession!
PBA – I love it. And I wouldn’t be surprised if half of it was true. The last decent repub pres was Reagan. And the last decent dem pres was LBJ.
LemonySnicket – Why in the world do you want to smoke? Go visit a cancer ward in a hospital and ask how many pipe smokers are there.
If you don’t find any, then you can smoke. You only see what’s in front of you -the Taavah, not the future misery of cancer and other horrible diseases.
notedaskan – If you want vapor, use a Nettie pot or a vaporizer.
Of course a hookah is just another way of inhaling the poison of tobacco. You can use it on Purim, but just Purim.
Charlie – He has to break the unions because they are breaking the taxpayer. Do you even know what that means? We are in a recession, if we ever want to dream about pulling out, we need strong leadership like over there. Everyone likes our governor here in NJ and I don’t know why. He doesn’t have the guts to do what the Wisconsin gov. is doing, so therefore we have the highest property taxes in the whole country.
“In public safety agencies, it is essential to have generous early retirement, lest you have 59 year old firefighters with heart disease trying to carry you out of a burning building, and 59 year old police officers with heart disease trying to subdue a criminal who is resisting arrest. The early retirement is for the good of the agency.”
Another outrageous comment. Your wifes’ a doc -I think she should retire now. I wouldn’t want a doc having a heart attack when they are in the middle of dealing with an emergency.
Let the unhealthy public servants stop going to donut shops and start exercising. The cops should be required to Walk the beat. The FF’s should actually exercise instead of eating and watching TV during their downtime.
cb 1 – I feel young, but some people would call me middle age.
” even when you are IN the marriage, you may be clueless as to how your spouse really thinks or feels.”
This could be in the marriage, but once one decides to get divorced, believe you me, the spouse knows exactly how the other thinks and feels!
notedaskan – It depends what you put inside. If it’s Pot or Hashish a lot would argue it’s good for you. 😉
If it’s tobacco, all tobacco is dangerous. Even if you say pipe smoking a little won’t cause mouth cancer, but it can’t be better than second-hand smoke, which they have proven dangerous to people’s health!
“whoever isn’t a party to their marriage shouldn’t have an opinion.”
So true! In my case, a few people convinced my wife to divorce me. I’m almost 100% sure that it would have never happenned without them.
binahyeseira – “Health – yes. i understand your point, but my point was: how would you know what they look like without make-up – most girls try to look their best when going on a date.”
By going out with someone you met without a date. Eg.- classmate, neighbor, anywhere that’s a casual situation. I know, some people will never go out of their house without makeup, but in these cases you can usually tell. It’s not possible to cover up totally.
guy-ocho – Go to your PCP. Meds work!
Mytake – My child – in our day and age, even when someone does something basic right, it’s praiseworthy!
ZK – I’m talking about someone in our day and age, not from years ago.
Pashuteh Yid – You are so wrong. They have to be accredited in order for the gov. to give them education money. Did you ever learn in a yeshiva that’s not your YU type? If not, why are you commenting about regular yeshivos?
Mod 80 – So then we have two new medical practioners here. Join the club. I bet the two together don’t equal my age.
Everyone has them. They can be normal or they can be pathological. If they happen quite often or they are accompanied by symptoms go to your PCP or a cardiologist. If you feel very faint, like you’re about to pass out, seek emergency care.
binahyeseira -“health: what man wants a girl naturally beautiful (without the makeup)?”
Don’t know what everyone else wants -that’s what I want.
The makeup that women put on, 99% of the time, is for the rest of the world. Very few women put on makeup at the time the husbands’ are supposed to arrive home. I did a driving job once to pick up a married man up at the airport from an overseas trip. I brought him home and lo and behold, the wife greeted him with a shaitel and makeup, in middle of the day. And no she wasn’t about to go out shopping or elsewhere. They weren’t newlyweds and had quite a few kids. I was very impressed.
ROB – It means simply the degree you get from Yeshiva. If you go to Lakewood or other yeshivos that take gov. money, they are officially colleges and give degrees. BTL is given after 4 years of yeshiva. Usually this degree means nothing in the goyishe world, but certain (or most) law schools will accept this as an undergraduate degree. This helps the yeshiva guy become a lawyer without having to get a regular undergrad degree. It didn’t help me at all to even lessen credits I needed in the sciences and this is with Touro. But there might be other things that the BTL helps for- maybe Accounting degrees or maybe getting a Masters in Education. Each program in college has their own requirements, sometimes yeshiva credits will count towards the degree and sometimes it won’t!
I don’t understand the women posters here. On other posts they have a discussion about painting their toes, fingers and they probably paint their faces too. If they themselves find themselves more attractive by painting themselves, why shouldn’t a man look for something that’s more attractive to him? They are willing to waste time and money to do themselves up and I’m not even talking about clothing, but all of a sudden if the male just wants a good-looking woman (just naturally without all the paint)
– he’s shallow!
MiI -” but have you ever dressed a sleeping child sitting in a chair”
When my kids lived with me, I don’t ever recall dressing them while sleeping, only undressing them. If this is a daily occurance, then there is a problem. Kids should wake up and then get dressed for the day.
“I end up leaning forward from the waist so I can see what I’m doing.”
Once you visualize it before you bend, just feel for it in the stoop position. DO NOT bend with your waist.
There are definitely activities that you shouldn’t be doing. Most activities can be done like described above; for the few that can’t, this is where your older kids and hubby come into play.
“perhaps if we went on a date looking for friendship instead of a trophy wife, we might end up finding something more.”
This is a very true statement. Look for someone similar to you in middos, haskafa, personality. Once you find that, you can look on your list for all your secondary issues.
There are critical limits in both directions. We in the medical field don’t like either. Don’t let yourself go to either extreme.
But I think -it’s much, much easier to treat a low than the high.
Each case is different and the OP should ask a shailah. The people posting here are just expressing their personal opinions. They aren’t experts. You aren’t even allowed to take legal action without permission from Bais Din. But if you want you can ask a lawyer right now, just in case the Bais Din will give you permission later on to seek relief in Court.
MiI – “I sat down on my son’s bed this morning to dress him and couldn’t get up after that. On Shabbos, I sat on the couch to read them a story and couldn’t get up. It’s easy to say not to bend or lift but life does have to go on.”
You can sit on a normal chair. You can bend and lift properly using your knees and keeping your back straight. It’s the easy way out to slouch on the couch and bend at the waist, but you pay for it. Most people I know take the easy out, but when there is a big weight gain like in pregnancy, you will suffer. The best policy is to train yourself to have proper posture all the time, so when you become pregnant you’re already used to doing the right thing. It’s never too late to change -no matter what the age!
Homeowner -What do you have to say regarding the following?
“If you’re going to work for yourself or the gov., go to any school that is good for you,(close, cheap, etc.) you don’t need the best”
“I shudder at the amount of debt involved, and I have not yet put down a seat deposit.”
“But (I speculate) if a former yeshiva guy goes to Columbia, he’s way ahead of an Ivy grad who goes to Fordham, and if he makes law review, he’s way ahead of an Ivy grad who’s at median.”
AZ – I don’t know why you hijacked this thread to talk about your obsession with the age gap. There are plenty of singles both male and female in their 30’s, 40’s and 50’s whom aren’t married. Why not? And at this age noone cares about age gap, except that the person can have kids.
MiI – I already addressed this:-
“Pain from sciatica often limits your activities. Here are some home treatments for sciatica:
* Do not bend, lift, or sit in a soft, low chair; your pain will get worse”
s2021 – Don’t make it that divorce is mostly the man’s fault. I don’t know what happenned in your case, but plenty of divorces are either both faults or just the woman is to blame!
cooljude – “i think u should just realize that this will pass and everyone has their issues.”
I think he can get over this now, even if he has to take meds!
Veltz Meshugener –
Why do you think you know it all? I’m not saying you don’t have the right to comment, but a lot of posters here are already in the field. You haven’t even started. One friend I know started working for himself. Another guy here couldn’t find a job working for others so he went for the LLM. I hope you plan on working for yourself or for the gov. because there doesn’t seem to be high paying jobs around. One of the points I think people were making was that it used to be getting into top law schools was almost a guarantee to get a good job. That’s not true anymore. So who cares if they accept BTL’s or not? If you’re going to work for yourself or the gov., go to any school that is good for you,(close, cheap, etc.) you don’t need the best. But one thing I’ll tell you -if an employer (looking for a lawyer) after you graduate has a choice between a BTL and regular undergraduate degree, which one do you think they’ll pick?
vicpr –
Why are you so against learning kollel guys? Did not having enough “materials” in your childhood bring you to this point?
The fact is it’s the style to say you want a learning guy. People are scared to break this trend because they might get stuck with “who knows what”. Don’t knock people because they think differently than you. Also, most people in Kollel aren’t living the pauper life like they used to. This is just my impression; and No, I’m not a kollel guy and really almost never learnt in kollel.
s2021- I don’t know why you should feel better, because that midnight snack you ate is probably over your calorie limit for the day!
MiI – “I actually don’t have back pain. The pain starts at the top of my hips and radiates down my thigh until just above my knee.”
What you probably have is sciatica, so all the above posts would apply.
This is from Medicine.net:
“What is sciatica?
Sciatica is pain in the lower extremity resulting from irritation of the sciatic nerve. The pain of sciatica is typically felt from the low back (lumbar area) to behind the thigh and radiating down below the knee. The sciatic nerve is the largest nerve in the body and begins from nerve roots in the lumbar spinal cord in the low back and extends through the buttock area to send nerve endings down the lower limb. The pain of sciatica is sometimes referred to as sciatic nerve pain.
What are causes of sciatica?
While sciatica is most commonly a result of a lumbar disc herniation directly pressing on the nerve, any cause of irritation or inflammation of the sciatic nerve can reproduce the symptoms of sciatica. This irritation of nerves as a result of an abnormal intervertebral disc is referred to as radiculopathy. Aside from a pinched nerve from a disc, other causes of sciatica include irritation of the nerve from adjacent bone, tumors, muscle, internal bleeding, infections, injury, and other causes. Sometimes sciatica can occur because of irritation of the sciatic nerve during pregnancy.
What are sciatica symptoms?
Sciatica causes pain, a burning sensation, numbness, or tingling radiating from the lower back and upper buttock down the back of the thigh to the back of the leg. The result is leg pain. Sometimes the pain radiates around the hip or buttock to feel like hip pain. While sciatica is often associated with lower back pain (lumbago), it can be present without low back pain. Severe sciatica can make walking difficult if not impossible. Sometimes the symptoms of sciatica are aggravated by walking or bending at the waist and relieved by lying down. The pain relief by changing positions can be partial or complete.”
From the Mayo Clinic website:
Back pain during pregnancy: 7 tips for relief
By Mayo Clinic staff
No. 1: Practice good posture
Stand up straight and tall.
Hold your chest high.
Keep your shoulders back and relaxed.
Don’t lock your knees.
Good posture also means sitting with care. Choose a chair that supports your back, or place a small pillow behind your lower back. Keep your upper back and neck comfortably straight. Consider propping your feet on a low stool.
No. 2: Get the right gear
Wear low-heeled shoes with good arch support. Wear maternity pants with a low, supportive waistband. You might also consider wearing a maternity support belt. Although research on the effectiveness of maternity support belts is limited, some women find the additional support helpful.
No. 3: Lift properly
When lifting a small object, squat down and lift with your legs. Don’t bend at the waist or lift with your back. It’s also important to know your limits. Ask for help if you need it.
No. 4: Sleep on your side
Sleep on your side, not your back. Keep one or both knees bent. It might also help to place one pillow between your knees and another under your abdomen, or use a full-length body pillow.
No. 5: Try heat, cold or massage
Use a heating pad to apply heat to your back, or alternate ice packs with heat. Rubbing your back also might help. Better yet, ask someone to rub your back for you or schedule a professional prenatal massage.
No. 6: Include physical activity in your daily routine
No. 7: Consider complementary therapies
Some research suggests that acupuncture can help relieve back pain during pregnancy. Chiropractic treatment seems to provide comfort for some women as well. If you’re considering a complementary therapy, discuss the options with your health care provider first. He or she may want to confirm that your back pain isn’t caused by an underlying condition.
Know when to consult your health care provider
However common, back pain during pregnancy isn’t something to ignore. Consult your health care provider if your back pain doesn’t respond to the self-care strategies described above. Medication such as acetaminophen (Tylenol, others) isn’t necessarily out of the question, but it’s important to check with your health care provider first.
PBA – “I would expect the moral of your story to be that bad marriage is always worse than no marriage.”
Of course it is. But do people get bad marriages because they settle on some Narishkeit? No, of course not.
Did you think I meant a frum person should marry a frei person?
Is this what I meant by settling?
You know what I mean by settling, eg.- he’s not such a masmid, he/she doesn’t make enough or have enough money, he’s/she’s a neb, he/she doesn’t dress the fanciest, latest style, he/she isn’t so good-looking, etc.
I could go on & on, but you get my drift!
Of course – “After 25, and especially after 30, after their being out in the world, singles have a mind of their own, and couldnt care less what parents say or want”
You don’t get my point. The adult that they have become is the result of their upbringing by family and friends. This has nothing to do with what kind of spouse that they claim they want.
A lot of these singles have bad attitudes in general, and in regards to marriage in particular. How many have the attutude -Nothing is good enough for me!?
From EmedicineHealth.com:
Sciatica Treatment
Self-Care at Home
Pain from sciatica often limits your activities. Here are some home treatments for sciatica:
* Do not bend, lift, or sit in a soft, low chair; your pain will get worse.
* Unless you are allergic or should not take them for other reasons (if you take a blood thinner such as Coumadin, for example), over-the-counter pain medicines such as acetaminophen (Tylenol), aspirin (Bufferin or Bayer Aspirin), or ibuprofen (Advil, Motrin IB) will probably help ease the pain.
* Try a cold pack to see if it helps the pain. If you don’t have a cold pack, use a large bag of frozen vegetables; it makes a good first aid cold pack. Or have someone close to you massage you in a triangular pattern with an ice cube over the sore areas. The person should move the ice cube if your skin gets too cold (this may melt several ice cubes).
o After the cold massages, try alternating with heat from an electric heating pad to see if it helps the pain. (Do not sleep with a heating pad on your back. It could cause a bad burn.)
o If you don’t have an electric heating pad, put a hand towel under hot water, wring it out, and place it on your back. Some physical therapy experts believe that moist heat penetrates more deeply and gives better relief of pain. (Do not use wet packs with your electric heating pad because electrical shock may result.)
* You may feel better lying on your back on a firm surface with a pillow under your knees. Another option is lying on your side with a pillow between your knees to keep your back straight. Also, you might find that a recliner chair is helpful.
* Take it easy, but do not lie in bed for longer than two days because this has been shown to actually worsen the condition. Do activities you are able to tolerate, and do not expect to feel better overnight.
Sciatica Medications
If you are suffering from sciatica, the doctor will almost certainly prescribe or give you some medication for the pain. If your pain is severe, you may need strong medicine such as a narcotic (Codeine, Vicodin, morphine) for relief.
Sciatica Surgery
If, despite doing everything you are instructed to do, the pain continues and your CT or MRI shows a problem with the disc or bone, you may need back surgery. This should not be performed until you have tried all other methods of treatment, and you should probably get at least two opinions before deciding on surgery as a last resort.
Other Therapy
* Physical therapy is often prescribed for sciatica.
* You may receive special instructions from your doctor on dealing with back pain. Some suggest complete bed rest — getting up only to go to the bathroom. Others suggest you sleep on the floor or put a board under your mattress for support. Some will tell you to use heat, others cold. You may also get information with pictures of back exercises and stretches you are expected to start when the pain improves. (These patient education sheets come from different sources and may have conflicting information.)
* Current research recommends that you stay active, within limits imposed by your pain. If you can avoid reinjuring yourself, you should try to stay at work. If the pain forces you to rest, do so, but avoid staying in bed just because you have back pain.
* If you are not improving after a week or 10 days, talk with your doctor about alternative therapies. Millions of people get some relief by visiting physical therapists, osteopaths, and chiropractors. Others find that relaxation techniques and acupuncture work for them.
* Studies have shown that exercise therapy is helpful to treat back pain that persists for more than a few weeks. Good exercises for sciatica include walking, yoga, Pilates, and other specialized exercise programs.
* Recent studies in Europe and Scotland show that injection of botulinum toxin (Botox) gives relief to many people suffering from long-term sciatica. There are, thus far, not enough cases or completed studies to make this more than an experimental procedure.
Follow-up
Common sense should tell you what to do.
* Continue the simple home care measures for easing the pain. Use pain medicines, both over the counter and those prescribed for you by your doctor.
* Avoid reinjuring yourself. Pain will be your guide. If you hurt too much, back off on what you are doing and rest. Go slowly, if necessary, but try to keep active.
* Using a cane or a crutch for support will be helpful until the pain is under control.
Sciatica Prevention
* Proper lifting techniques in keeping your back straight while bending your knees to pick up items often help avoid mechanical back problems.
* Keep flexibility and muscle tone by performing stretching exercises. These will help keep your back from bothering you. Maintaining your weight within your recommended limits for your height will go a long way to maintaining a healthy back as well.
From Medicine.Net:
“Does eating later in the day really cause you to gain weight? At what time of the day should I stop eating?”
Author: Betty Kovacs, MS, RD
Answer:
“It is possible to gain weight by eating later in the day, but not for the reason that most people think. You have a set number of calories that your body needs to maintain your current weight. If you stay within your calorie requirements, your weight will remain the same. When you take in more calories than your body needs, you gain weight. This will happen regardless of when you consume those calories. Let’s say that you can eat 2,000 calories a day and your weight remains the same. If you consumed extra calories at any time throughout the day, you will gain weight from those calories, not from the time of day that you consumed them. The reason that people say that we gain weight from eating at night is because most people consume a lot of calories at this time. Many studies have showed that people report that the hardest time of day for controlling their food intake is between dinner and bedtime. So, the reason you would gain from eating at this time is because you ate too many calories, not because your body doesn’t process them in the same way.
If you find that you are eating a lot in the evening, it may be beneficial to select a time to stop eating and to set a plan for what you will eat. Take a look at what time you have dinner and decide how much food is reasonable for you to have between then and bedtime. Select the food(s) that you will be allowed to have and when you will have them. The more that you plan ahead for this, the easier it will be to do.”
PBA – “Health: That is what I mean. That is why I don’t understand why you would be counseling people to settle.”
You obviously didn’t read my first post. Here it is: “When the single person is in their twenties, they shouldn’t settle for anything they don’t want; after that they should.”
You could have figured I got married in my twenties; but why let an opportunity to put someone else down pass?!?
Ofcourse – “Health, I dont think its family and friends. By the time the single is 30 the parents and friends are d i e i n g for the single to get married, in the cases I see. They’re tired of looking for Mr./Miss Perfect.”
Of course I couldn’t disagree more! It might not be overtly always, but the attitudes and Haskafahs that they have instilled in the single person have now permeated that guy/gal and that’s why they can’t settle. Therapists have ways to change people’s bad attitudes.
PBA – I’m divorced. And I did settle; if I knew how much I was truly settling I would have waited. I still hope to get remarried, even though I have kids.
whatrutalkingabt – “I dont think they’d really “rather stay single”. I think they keep hoping that the one they envisioned is just around the corner.”
I agree. The Yetzer Horah tells them this.
The reality is almost every person you go out with when you’re older, the next will not be as good as the one now. Stop fooling yourselves and take what you can get. This would be true for younger people also, except that a lot of people in their twenties haven’t grown up yet. So it’s still possible the next could be better. Once singles reach the stage of not changing anymore, what I said above applies!
To the OP – I agree; I think people just won’t settle and are Mevatel a Mitzva. This has become commonplace in our society.
When the single person is in their twenties, they shouldn’t settle for anything they don’t want; after that they should.
But what happens is- afterwards family and friends get involved. They say -you’re going to marry that -you Deserve much better! Unfortunately, the guy or gal doesn’t see the big picture. Then they listen to their family and friends. Eventually they become depressed and lose interest. This is all a Maasseh Soton. I believe the family and friends are going to give more of Din v Cheshbon than the actual person who didn’t get married.
Ctrl Alt Del -“Nursing home expereience is actually frowned upon by hospital administrators.”
Are you saying they would hire someone with no experience whatsoever, than someone with nursing home experience?
I don’t know what your impresssion of my comments are, but nursing has gone the way of computer programmers. It used to be when you got out of school if you were a programmer, you got a job. Not anymore; there are jobs, but they are hard to come by.
The same thing with nursing. But, I stand by all of my previous comments.
MR – “Posting on blogs is also women’s work. No its not”
Sure it is. Women post on blogs just like men. Women work in nursing just like men. If nursing is women’s work, so is blogging.
Also, blogging is Bitul Torah, Mr. Rose.
“it was very sad to see a young 3 year old boy coming in for stiches with the grandmother”
I think I should charge double for closing wounds on Purim, even though I don’t need to use Lidocaine because they feel no pain.
PBA – “I would certainly want to heavily supervise the drinking of anyone under 18.”
All bochurim should be supervised, even in their 20’s. Some married adults also need supervision. Usually it’s the wife, not his parents; she just has one more kid to watch on Purim.
I posted this months ago on the High Cholesterol topic: Reader’s Digest has a site called Change One. Here they help people lose or maintain their weight. They even have a section for diabetics. I don’t know how much they charge, but I trust these people for accuracy. Their recipes include all sorts of different types of food, not just veggies!
CF- Thanks.
Rebbitzen – I’d rather be called a yenta; my personality is so NOT “Macher” type!
PBA -“But I don’t see that as being the argument advanced here. I see people arguing that the entire mitzva is inappropriate to the extent it means drunkenness.”
I don’t agree with them, but I also don’t agree with people who hold it’s a Hefker Velt. Two wrongs don’t make a right. I’ve seen over the years many parents just throw in the towel and don’t know or care what goes on with their kids. If their kid is away in Yeshiva, they just assume someone is responsible for them. A lot of yeshivos- noone, not even Rebbeyim take responsibility for the bochurim. Parents must find out beforehand.
This could be the reason a lot of people are against getting drunk nowadays.