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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were going camping. They pitched their tent under the stars and went to sleep. Sometime in the middle of the night Holmes woke Watson up and said: “Watson, look up at the stars and tell me, what do you see?”
Watson replied: “I see millions and millions of stars.”
Holmes said: “And what do you deduce from that?”
Watson replied: “Well, if there are millions of stars, and if even a few of those have planets, it’s quite likely there are some planets like earth out there. And if there are a few planets like earth out there, there might also be life.”
And Holmes said: “Watson, you idiot, it means that somebody stole our tent.”
Here are 2 Little Johnny Jokes I just found:
Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid. Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime — Little Johnny always takes the nickel.
One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor man takes him aside and says, “Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. Don’t you know that a dime is worth more than a nickel, even though the nickel’s bigger?”
Johnny grins and says, “Well, if I took the dime, they’d stop doing it, and so far I’ve made $20!”
Teacher: “Little Johnny, give me a sentence using the word, ‘geometry.'”
Little Johnny: “A little acorn grew and grew until it finally awoke one day and said, ‘Gee, I’m a tree.'”
Little Johnny’s teacher asks him to make a sentence using the following words: defeat, deduct, defense and detail.
Little Johnny says, “De feet of de duck went over de fence before de tail.”
Very Cute!!
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Thank you that was just what I wanted to hear now 🙂
Hi everybody 🙂
Jax- on the last page you wrote about a myth of mentos and coke, why don’t you try it? Take a new bottle of coke. Within the first 10 seconds after you open it drop in mento and see what happens. Be sure you do it in a place where yoy don’t mind a mess! Have fun!
OK I’ll let you guys in on a big secret- I’m not Houdini or Himelstein 🙁
I’m a regular female!
anybody else care to explain their name?
I love this thread but I think it’s time for updating. Can all the people who joined in the last month (or changed names) please explain their screen name?
BTW I chose mine ‘cuv my initials are hh.
There are 7 points on the crown of the Statue of Liberty representing the 7 continents.
I just checked it out- WOW…COOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A new, cute, fun indoor waterpark opened in a Hilton around an hour away from Lakewood. I’ve been there a monthe agao and we had a great time. Now I want to take my family there and I forgot what it’s called. Anyboby knows?
Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank.
In my house we are pretty into serving dessert. Here’s some of our favorites:
* take peanut butter and confectionary sugar. Mix in Kitchen Aid until it makes tiny balls. Put 3/4 of it into a pie crust. Then make an instant vanilla pudding and pour it over the crumbs. Then put on a layer of whip cream. On the top put the rest of the crumbs. Freeze, but defrost just a few minutes before serving.
* A scoop of vanilla ice cream with hot chocolate cake, hot apple pie, or hot chocolate fudge.
* Ice cram bonnets- we make this for a simcha because we make it in advance and it looks stunning. In a small candy bowl put in a scoop of your favorite vanilla ice cream. Heat up some chocolate. Use a medicine squirter and drizzle it over the ice cream. While the chocolate is still hot sprinkle a cruch (we use pistachio). Then you can stick in a presidor roll, a cookie, or a chocolate mold. (we serve it on chanuka awith a menorah cookie, by a bar mitzva with a tefillin shaped chocolate…)
* Any ice cream with a rice krispies crunch
If anything sounds exciting- let me know and I’ll post the recipies.
T
moish- the mention of a laffy taffy put me in the mood. Right now I’m eating a blue one and the joke is: What did the noodles say to the butter?
*Don’t try and butter me up*
Ha ha!
Detective h2 here! AOB was here since February 1, 2009 🙂
Hello!
moish: the longest word is really hard. It’s a medical term (what else) and I can’t even pronounce it- forget about memorizing the spelling. If ya really wanna know you gotta ask one off those genius geeks- jk- I just don’t know it!
Keep in mind it’s not only the long words that are good. For instance I once did floccinaucinihilipilification (the second to longest word in the dictionary)and it didn’t take to long to guess ‘cuz it’s basically easy letters!
It is assur to tear letters on Shabbos. It comes under the melacha of mochek. If it is for food- you can open a package (some poskim say different ways to do it) but never on letters. And about opening a book with words stamped on it: the mishna berura says says it perferable not to- but it’s not assur.
Right now I’m on a dell laptop and I really like it! I got it in September for $700. It was really $1000 but they were running a special for the first 100 people that bought compters for the new school year. I was #74. There was also $100 rebate. I suggest that if you’re not in a rsh for a new computer you should wait for good sales- I heard they’re gonna have good ones in early March.
I also recommend Dell because they have really awesome service. If anything breaks they will almost always fox it on the phone (and they have really nice representatives) if they can’t fox it they will send a repairman THE NEXT DAY! I have my computer for like 5 months- honestly I’m pretty rough with it- but they replaced the hard drive twice and the motherboard and fixed my computer 100s of times all free of charge!
Here’s acute joke I just heard;
An atheist teacher asked a Jewish student “If you can’t see your god- why do you believe in him?”
The student answered, “OK teacher, I can’t see your brains- that means you don’t have!”
ames- I’m talking about all bais yacovs in general and they strongly discourage make up really until 12th grade graduation pics (that’s already for shidduchim). Even then they onlt let certain stuff like lip gloss, light eye shadow… And you can’t wear lipstick, base, blush, eye liner…
syriansephardi: when I said assur I meant it’s a real big no-no!
ames: I’m not sure what school you’re referring to but in my school they never let you wear make up. A few weeks ago my grade had a Shabbos together and teacher gave a whole speech on how we may not wear evena drop of make up that Shabbos. She said we shouldn’t wear make up ’till we’re 25 (OK, she did exaggerate)! Another teacher (the one who taught us that pasuk in yishaya) said that the only reason someone should wear make up is for her husband or when dating so a girl my age should never put on make up. In short they do tell you not to wear even out of school.
When is says in the navi (yishaya) ??????? ????? one of the miforshim (I think rashi)says that it means winking, the DRASH is that it’s a VERY dark color BLUE!
Also it’s totally ASSUR to go to school wearing make up!
Thank you for the warm welcome, but how do you know I joined if I never even posted yet?