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“Y&P can you be a little clearer about what you are saying and why you are saying it?”
Because had he said Jews are the best and brilliant, he wouldnt have gotten anywhere near the reaction he did.
edited
GM1 (thanks for the recommendations ;-), and others, what specific brands (lasts longest) do u use for
lipstick,
lipliner,
concealer, and
face powder (I think loose powder probably works best for preserving makeup, is there something better than the MAC loose powder)?
TIA
1-What lipstick and technique is best for lips that literally drink the lipstick?
2-What foundation product and technique is best for skin that literally drinks the foundation?
Even before I go to sleep on Friday night, already my makeup almost disappears.
PuhLease, we all came from the same place, have bumps along the way, and we’ll all end up in the same place, whether we wear skirts or pants or both.
What is your feeling about the current situation in Israel, where our relatives’ lives there are in danger? Did your change of dress go hand in hand with any shift in loyalties to and concern for your relatives there?
Either way, take care of yourself, stay healthy and love your kids.
I have no fear for any OTD people.
Chut Hameshulash Lo Bimhaira Yenatek.
PuhLease
“and that includes my ex husband, who beat me, and continues to lay hands on my children in anger…….And, for a “rav” to state with clarity that I may have done something to “deserve” that, is also completely uncalled for, and does not deserve the title that his smicha paper is written on”.
No one can deny that!!! I think most would agree with you.
But, for every “Rav” like that, there are many who are totally different.
PuhLease,
Stay healthy.
Im not worried for you or any other OTD individual.
Theres the present and then there are future generations.
Chut Hameshulash Lo Bimhaira Yenatek.
PuhLease,
“I cannot respond fairly to your question, because I do not feel that my parents ever love/loved me….I was a status symbol. Nothing more, nothing less”.
I feel for you.
Sometime parents innocently, or not so innocently, make terrible mistakes with child rearing.
Please, for the benefit of those of us raising children, tell us what you’ve seen that parents dont grasp are important to do and not to do, if they want to communicate to their children that they love them. Perhaps you can give us a list of must do-s, and a list of must not do-s.
If, as a result, you lead to even one child feeling more loved, that would be really beautiful and a great contribution to society.
I am addressing the OTD people posting here, who feel their parents loved them:
Please tell me what is so enriching in your present life (if youre living moral lives and the “donts” of a frum life were not too much for you to bare, because youre living similarly now), that you knowingly are shortening your loving grieving parents’ lives?
And, BE HONEST, what do you miss about your Frum past? There has to be something, whether youre conscious of it and willing to admit it or not. BE HONEST.
There’s nothing like a good word. A gesture of appreciation for something you’ve done. Nothing beats feeling appreciated.
and
There’s nothing like a good sense of self (healthy self esteem). You take that with you wherever you go.
The little I know:
” …but until a case ends up there, I am not sure the awareness and recognition of the problem will be enough to save our children”.
Unfortunately the devastation caused by “being told by a person in a position of power, in very loud tones, for all nearby to hear, that you’re the lowest scum of the earth and that no one can be lower than you, and even public schools wouldnt want you and you should be on medication (all for NOT the most serious offenses by anyone’s standards)” is still not worthy of police intervention.
Thats part of the problem.
UNLESS AND UNTIL Askonim, powerful supporters of individual schools, do what they should do and pull the right strings.
The little I know:
“We have big leaks, losing too many children. How can we plug the leaks?”
Plug the leaks for sure, a crucial part of which would be to eliminate those in Chinuch, who clearly crush whatever is left of some kids’ self esteem, even if these Chinuch “professionals” do good for others at the same time.
How would you, and most, react to being told by a person in a position of power, in very loud tones, for all nearby to hear, that you’re the lowest scum of the earth and that no one can be lower than you, and even public schools wouldnt want you and you should be on medication (all for NOT the most serious offenses by anyone’s standards)?
I believe it would stay deeply embedded in your heart for life and seriously eliminate any chance EVER for love of Yiddishkeit.
If we allow this to continue, we truly deserve what we get.
The little I know:
“Our mainstream leaders are full of denial and completely blind to the neshamos of these children. They have turned a deaf ear to their cries. They will immorally defend the yeshivos for the persistent rejections imposed on these kids, and there is no yeshiva or community leader that will stand up to insist that the rejection and abusiveness (emotional and physical) must stop”.
How right you are!
I know of one principal of a girls High School in BP, who when he expels a girl, tells her that she is the lowest scum of the earth and that no one can be lower than her, and even public schools wouldnt want her and she should be on medication.
All this from someone who should be a role model. He’s the ideal recipe for kindling interest in Frumkeit. Many people, Rabbonim and Askonim included, are aware of this principal’s behavior and do nothing. No one has been forceful enough to see that this principal begs Mechila from the students he has done this to.
I wonder if boys schools have similar “role models”.
Theres one advantage to this sitch. Said principal is in his seventies and hopefully will retire soon, one way or another.
Theres one disadvantage to this sitch. Unless we take seriously the despicable behavior of principals and the effects, we will have many other young principals who savor the power to rebuke in this style and cause more damage than benefit to these Neshamas.
What do you think should be done with principals like those?
So you say to yourselves, who knows what prompted this principal’s reaction, the principal is human and therefore capable of making mistakes.
This mistake is too far-reaching and long lasting to allow it to recur.
“In an exclusive interview with motorists at the Rio Gas Station on 14th Avenue Corner 38th Street in Brooklyn, the motorist reported being on line after 11:00 pm at a gas station in the Boro Park Section of Brooklyn, when suddenly the cop that was monitoring the Gas Station announced on his Public Address System that there is no more gas, and that the vehicles on line should leave.
The attendant told Mr. Glick, as well as several other motorists to pull into the gas station, park on the side, shut the headlamps, and wait for the officer to leave, and then he will refuel them. They did and as soon as the officer left the attendant allowed them one by one, with headlamps turned off, to refuel at one pump, they all refueled without a problem.
Gestetner Updates got similar reports from different gas stations around the city.
Is this a game from Bloomberg to get additional Federal assistance? or is this just a way to cut overtime pay for the NYPD? both are possibilities, but this scandalous behavior must stop immediately”.
vochindik, “The main thing to daven for is that there be peace”.
Unfortunately, to some powerful inhabitants of this planet, the definition of Peace in the Middle East is seeing Israel in pieces.
Lets see what the newly re-elected big O does with his bechira.
WIY: “but for everyone else you gotta keep all of it to the best of your abilities”.
So you and I agree that different people, at different ages and points in their life, from different backgrounds, different families, the list of differences goes on, etc.. may not be able to observe all Halachos in the same manner.
A whole nation cant be poured into a mold to get identical resuts.
“Also make sure you are careful with the big ones like Shabbos, Kashrus, Taharas Hamishpacha, tzedaka…”
If life and death and good and bad were doled out based solely on our actions, we wouldnt deserve any reward for the good we do, because it would be self-serving.
What about Tzadik v’Ra lo and Rasha v’Tov lo?
Sometimes were urged to observe past our individual limits and at the end of the day, it lessens our observance and belief, not increases it.
Its like telling a child “Be good annd you’ll get your lolly”. How good is good enough? There are people who go mad hoping that if they continuously improve, their dreams will be realized and then they are not. This sometimes pushes them totally off, mentally and religiously. Not good.
Whoever thinks that there is no relation between the issue of difficulties in finding Shidduchim and the accompanying stress to families and singles, and the issue of kids going OTD should think again.
The poor and less connected are aching.