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The level of dialogue here in the YWN CR is really outstanding. Every few weeks, there is some posting complaining that criticisim of other yidden by some participant or strong disagreement with a political view expressed by a well know rav is either lashon harah, mevazeh talmid chacom or apikorsus (or in some cases a trifecta of all three). By and large, the Mods seem to be trying to keep us on the high road without cutting off legitimate dissenting views. In many cases, there are facts and realities which some may regard as lashon harah but in reality must be stated and openly debated. Shutting down discussion in the name of avoiding someone else’s definition of “lashon horah” would substantially erode the valuie of this site.
Joseph….
Sadly, there are many yiddeshe “magazines”, “news outlets” etc. which hav a Rav on their mastheads and still barely rise to the level of “Daas Balebatim”…..having some rebbele on the staff is no guarantee of a higher level of journalistic compliance with shulchan aruch given that so many of the likely questions of lashon horah, mavazeh talmedei chachamims, tzinius,etc are nuanced.
In theory, every business has the potential to encounter issues of halacha but that doesn’t mean you need to pay some rebbe to set around during business hours in case you have a shaylah. Many food establishments have gone out of business, in part because of the high cost of keep a mashgiach on the payroll.. If a media company has some issue arise, send an email, text or just call your rav/posek and ask if some comment might be construed as lashon haroah or some photo might cross the line on matters of tziniu.
Does a real ben torah who shteigs all week, goes to mikvah every morning, foregoes a smart phone etc. but looks forward to several hours on Thursday nights at the local gourmet chulent venue with his chavrusah qualify as a “foodie”? This whole tread seems to imply there is a bright line test on both “ehrliche” and “foodie” defined to a large extent on when induling in certain earthly “pleasures” become “excessive”.
Too much angst about the ehrliche cousins or chashuve rabbonim who somehow cannot ever seem to get their acts together, and allow enough time for traffic et. al. so they can arrive on time. Better to delay hundreds of people, stress out th already stressed chasan/kalah etc. and just get started rather than c’v having to explain to cousin mordechai or some rebbele why you started without them. Answer is simple, as we bring down from chazal, “TIME WAITS FOR ON ONE”…
Sadly, putting the newspaper into a shaimos bin at the beis medrash may be the same as putting into the blue recycling bin at the curb. There have been so many recent episodes of bags of shaimos turning up near landfills, in abandoned rental trucks or simply strewn on the street.
If the Ebeshter did not want us to experience “pleasure” from ingesting great food separate from the physiological need for nutrition, why did he wire our nervous system and sensory organs so that such “pleasure ” messages get sent from mouth to brain???
For a younger couple (in their late teens) its probably better for the boy’s parents to meet their future daughter-in-law since boys of this age may be impulsive and would benefit from parental advice.. For boys in the 20s and 30s, maybe less important.
Having seen many chashuve rabbonim and poskim engaging in dinner events that were NOT tied directly to a seudas mitzvah and went far beyond what one might opine was necessary for sustenance, its fair to speculate that they were not worrying about risking their share of olam haboh or otherwise engaging in bitul torah by simply having a good meal.
Very fact specific….too many scheduled visits and overbooking in many cases simply as basic economics for small practices trying to meet “quotas” to cover their costs. Unscheduled emergency visits or patients with more complex issues add to the delays since their is no “free time” built into the schedule.
To DellEpson;
First of all yasher koach on Dell announcing this AM it will do a reverse merger with vM Ware, with the surviving company taking the Dell name so you may need to update your posting name.
Second, you are right on with respect to how much easier it is to maintain your yiddeshkeit while living in Zimbawe or Antarctica w/o having all the sinas chinam so pervasive within ostensibly “frum” communities as our day-to-day environment.
“You’re not supposed to understand chumash at your age the way you understood it at three. A primitive understanding of the avos should not serve as your yardstick for life…”
Actually, I am a great believer in the admonition from chazal that “everything you need to know in life, you learned in kindergarden”…….it also lends credence to the commonly encountered phenomena that “Your Gashmiyus Is My Ruchniyus” whether on food or any other indulgence that doesn’t involve shteiging 24×7Yehuda: Several GOP Congressman who were among the most strident opponents of voting rights for felons (which is primarily a STATE issue) are now themselves felons
Hey Charlie…..we now have Yosef and Binyamin (rather than Milhouse) to kick around…I remember a similar debate about 7 or 8 years ago about the wisdom of substituting the advice of a rav for that of a medical professional. Fake news then, fake news now….rabbonim paskin Halacha and give musar, doctors paskin diagnostic and treatment protocols.
Have fun lurking
[being a Foodie]… is a secular hedonistic expression which contradicts the mitzva of Kedoshim T’hiyue.”
As the resident expert in all forms of ” secular hedonistic expression” (at least from Joe’s perspective) I can assure you that we have had “foodies” among gadoylei yisroel for generations. We can even go back to the avos and remind ourselves that a certain “son” sought to gain favor with his father by exploiting his yearning for good food.
There are many “real” fruits (aka boreh peri h’aetz) at reasonable prices available in your local supermaket.,…the fixation on dried fruis to some extent is a residual of generations past when “fresh fruit” was not readily available in the winter months
Joe says that literacy in the English language shouldn’t be relevant to voting rights for the frum tzibur and they should be allowed to participte in selecting our public officials notwithstanding their inability to communicate in the English langauge and for many of them, making zero economic contribution to the economy. However, his hero, the Trumpkopf in Chief, has insisted we need to prioritize access to America to those who speak English, want to assimilate into our society and contribute to our economy. So I guess, Joe will be overjoyed if they start rounding up those in can’t speak English and refuse to work and start shipping them back to the Alte Heim so we can make room in Monsey,BP, Willy and Lakewood for some more productive Norwegians.
A tallis katan with tzitzis 70 cm THICKNESS would require a crane to lift since that is about the size of the heavy lines used by big ships to tie them to the docks….
If any Rav runs out of a chassanah screaming “pritzus” because the Chassan/Kalah sat next to one another in front of hundreds of guests at the chassanah, I think we all know who has a problem. (Hint: its not the chasson or the kalah or the photographer).
One good turn deserves anoher. Tell the azaz panim that each time he disrepects his in-laws, there will be a reduction in the “support check” for the next month. Perhaps give some money to your daughter on the side soe the kids don’t suffer but othrwise, no need to finance your own misery.
Greetings from the Greek Isles and a special shout out to Binyamin.
While I’m not sure if being called a “Hellenist” is sort of like being designatd an upscale apikores, I go back to a simple point that in matters of public health such as vaccination against highly infectious diseases, our primary sources of guidance are medical and public health professionals, not a rav or posek, no disrepect to the latter. If something about the medical advice we receive raises a red flag, than certainly discussing it with you R/P may be warranted and he may offer some useful guidance as to reconciling that advice with halacha. If the Rav himself is not also a medical professional, it was be malpractice for him to render medical opinions. We are not like the goyishe lunatics who refuse medical care, transfusions etc. because doing so might contradict their misguided notion of hashgacha paratis (i.e. if you are sick its (R’L) “God’s will” and seeking medical intervention is to disrupt “God’s” will. Even if you want to put yourself and your own family at risk by foregoing recommended vaccinantion s (with the concurrence of your R/P), you have zero right to project your foolishness on the rest of the Tzibur and place others at risk.Having said that, hoping all the CR family including UB) stays well and is up-to-date on the ir shots.
We are individuals, each in the imgage of the Ebeshter but projecting different values, strengths, and weaknesses. There is no reason for couples either to expect or aspire to have matching readings on eiher the bitachon or hishtadlus meters. We should individually aspire to be the best we can but not stress out our partners or being viewed as constantly giving musar on how the “other” can improve.
Student….you are 100 percent correct…its all a function of your situation, lifestyle, local minhagim and expectations. You can spend anywhere from $25-$100 pp depending on what you want (not what you need). You only need an aliyah on Thursday morning, two bottles of scotch, a few bottles of soda, and a takeout platter of bagels, cream cheese (and spluirge with lox)
From the bottom of the “bor”, the view is a bit blurry but Binyamin’s willingness to ignore the consensus of real medical experts and blindly substitute the advice of his Rav on the risks of vaccination is truly admirable…..just don’t bother sending your kids to school or coming in close contact with otherwise rational yidden who don’t go to their physician to paskin on the the kashruth of their local Chinese take out place or whether they can ingest the cute little bugs on the romaine in the Caesar salad. Wisdom is knowing from whom to seek knowledge on a particular subject. Since its now eruv Shabbos I can wish you a gutten Shabbos and stay healthy.
The WH just clarified that consistent with the President’s long-standing position, no work will begin on moving the Embassy to Yerushalayim until EY agrees to pays for the new Embassy building. He further conditioned the Embassy move on EY also agreeing to pay for the wall along the Mexican border and changing the name of Kind David hotel to the King Donald Hotel.
There are also frequent assertions here on various threads that the pre-War generation of gadolim in the alte heim were somehow on higher madragah than those of today. From there, it is presumed that the downward spiral implied by the concept of yeridas hadoros continues unabated and will not be remedied until z’man moishiach. Ultimately, we go back to the notion that there are objective standards through which one can measure the “gadlus” of the gadolim of today versus those of prior generations and the kedushah and spirituality of yidden today versus those of our grandparents in the alte heim.
Where does “Halacha” speak directly to vaccinations?? As a practical matter, what rational Rav would knowingly advise against getting a vaccination unless the consensus of public health officials would also advise against it? And if there was such advice against the consensus of medical experts, one should quickly find a new rav/posek who would not put him/her at risk.
iacisrmma….
Perhaps you can do a milchig stand-up Kiddush after davening for about $25/pp in Flatbush but thats NOT the frame of reference in the original question which implied the family was doing a full seated meal with music, photographer and simcha hall rental…. get real. They are not doing some quickie Kiddush catered by the Sisterhood or fish platters from some local takeout place (hopefully not sushi from Jin in Passaic)
We have been fortunate in our lifetimes to have had some of the greatest gadolei yisroel in generations share with us their daas torah and ahavas yisroel to an extent I cannot imagine was exceed in any prior generation. We still suffer from a level of sinas chinam that some would say is the biggest obstacle to z’man morishiach but its hard to imagine from a spiritual perspective we are on a downward trendline. Some will invoke the internet as the biggest contributor to moral decline but over the long term, I think this will be shown to have resulted in greater access to torah knowledge than any other single development in our history.
Not a simple yes/no question. An attorney may claim mental impairment, illness etc. consistent with advocacy on behalf of his client to the extent it would be exculpatory under the charges brought by the prosecutor or mitigate the charges or in sentencing. The procedural rules and ethical obligations of counsel are governed by the applicable federal or state laws in the proceeding, local bar rules, the circumstances in which he/she has assumed the representation (e.g. retained by the client, court appointment etc).
The “gashmisus versus ruchnius’ battle goes on virtually non-stop since every decision about “how much is too much” triggers a question of whether at the margin, additional expenditures don’t contribute to hidur mitzvah but rather are focused on “hidur those who are the simcha machers” (aka showing up in shul with a Calabrian esrog that cost several hundred dollars in a sterling silver box). There is no bright line test in terms of $$/person spent on a bar mitzvah any more so than having a chassidus charter a commercial jet to shlep over several hundred chassidim to join a rav at some simcha or on his vacation or advertising a “heimeshe peisach” at some incredibly expensive Florida hotel for a cost of $5,000 per family member. Its what you can afford and what makes you happy. Every dollar you spend for a simcha celebration beyond the minimum required to be yotzeh the mitzvah, at the margin, could feed some poor family or help some yesomim. But that’s not life.
To RebYIdd23
Obvious: POTUS
There is a growing trend today, even among frum families, for the woman to retain her name or use a hyphenated name, especially among women who pursue both families and a professional career. As another poster noted, there is NOTHING in hallacha that mandates adopting a husband’s name, even though that is the norm today among both yidden and goyim.
Binyan:
Actually, the name of the shevet was Shevet Joseph, not Shevet Yosef….after a lengthy review of CR postings here on YWN, the Ebeshter realized that it would be easier to just go with Joseph rather than suffering through 327 postings under 14 different aliases as to why Yosef had all sorts of negative implications (e.g. his initial treamtment of his brother when they arrived im mitzrayim)To Winnie: probably the former…unless you happen to be wishing it to some guy in chassidish lvush on Eastern Parkway waving a yellow flag and humming a new nigun for “Yechi”
Chazal bring down that it was dor ha’midbar that first started the minhag of renting simcha halls and having the Lipa Shmetzer of their generation perform at chassanas……Just about every generation of yidden has put its spin on the conduct of simchas and added to the minhagim which evolve over time. There is no “right” or “wrong” way for the chassn/kallah to arrive at the simcha hall….in India they arrive on an Elephant (not sure about yidden in India)….here in the NYC area, they may arrive in an Oddessy or SUV (if the kallah is wearing her hair up) but may have to walk the last block or two because all of the cars double and triple parked in front of the simcha hall.
” …..Presumably this is not such an issue in a Yeshiva Dorm…”
Hopefully you are correct but as a purely public health matter, the CDC strongly encourages the vaccination as do most state heath departments. There also are studies indicating transmission vectors via non-sexual but still “close” physical contacts which may very well be a concern in a yeshiva dorm where the bochurim “horse around” and engage in the same types of physical interactions as in any dorm. Also, there are very few side effects from meningococcal conjugate vaccine used to protect against bacterial meningitis. To my knowledge, there is no vaccine against the viral form of the disease.
more focused on the SPF rating on their sunblock than my knitting afghans…BTW, are yidden allowed to use an afghan if it is shatnes?
Perhaps say it with the understanding that you are wishing the other person will continue to have the z’chus to live in Yerushalayiim next year and the year after etc… also wish that the next year there will be less conflict and more tolerance of the multiple communities living in the City, each with different political and religious perspectives.
Binyamin….please don’t be so funny….I almost fell out of my rocking chair. You also misspelled “ameratzus”. On a more serious note, if you profile the names of many chazal over the centuries, you will discover that there are names that have as much nexus to torah as Gali, Ayit, Suki or any of the other dozen or so most popular names today in EY. If you are more comfortable with 12 variations on the avos and imahos, each ending in “LE” , that go for it. Mi kamocha yirsroel (or is that mi kamacha Yisroeleh?)
When I did my regional planning degree (at the Univ of Pennsylvania) back before the Civil War (or so it feels) the only recognized degrees were either MRP or MCP.. The new MURP degrees now offered by many universities are slightly much more focused on social issues and inner city economic development but its all labeling and marketing. If you go o the PAB website they list the degrees offered by over 200 public and private universities and the names of the degrees vary. You have to go to the individual schools’ website and read about their program focus. Most importantly, see if you can find some alumni in your city or area or ask for some email contacts from their alumni office. That will give you a much better idea of what kinds of jobs their graduates have actually pursued.
Much hatzlacha in whatever path you take.
Talking about apples and oranges….depends on your income, local minhagim (invite everyone in the shul for the luncheon or just to a “Kiddush” with lunch reserved for the family/friends, whether lunch is table service or buffet etc. For a formal lunch, the $30K estimate is not unreasonable for upscale kosher caterer with large family/friends invited. Obviously, the norm is much lower in NYC area…typical $7000-$10,000 max for buffet lunch in shul verus renting a simcha hall nearby.
Seeing yngerleit and even some of their rabbonim engaging in the disgust habit of smoking right outside of the doors of the yeshiva/beis medrash is a much greater chilul hashem than cannabis. The selective morality (aka getting drunk on purim is OK) is contradicted by the efforts in recent years to limit or eliminate excess drinking by most roshei yeshivos and askanim affiliated with various mosdos.
Uncle Benny…we agree….I might even consider Binyamin for my new pet parakeet
Stop trying to create Halacha where none exists…..naming children goes by the minhagim of the family…there is NO strict limits as all the above postings have noted that many well known rabbonim and askanim have names derived from other languages or are variations of goiyeshe names or modern ivrit. Unless we restrict names to those of men and women mentioned in torah and neveeim,, there is no significance to a “Zissel” than to Gal or Raffi
Daas Yachid says…”Any comparison to kiddush wine, a glass of wine with dinner, or even drunkenness on Purim and Simchas Torah, is so ridiculous as to make the motivation for the argument completely transparent”
Sorry, but on one said having a glass of wine for Kiddush or dinner should be assur (unless you don’t know what the word “moderation” means and if so, you have other issues. When you day there is no comparison between getting high on week and getting drunk on wine (“drunk” means beyond “moderation”), tell that to the parents of yungerleit killed by drunken drivers on Purim (or year round)….the number of traffic deaths attributed to cannabis (according to data from the CDC) is less than 1 percent (.003%) of those attributed to alcohol.
One really amazing outcome of a Goral ha/Gra was posted here in the CR about 7 years ago:
One dramatic instance of the use of the Gra Goral was in the identification of the bodies of 12 members of the Lamed Heh (the Convoy of 35, with the Hebrew letters lamed and heh being equivalent to the numbers 30 and 5, respectively ). The 35 fighters, members of the Haganah pre-state militia, were killed in January 1948, during the War of Independence, at the foot of the Arab village of Tzurif, during their attempt to reach the Etzion Bloc of Jewish settlements, south of Jerusalem. The bodies of the fighters were mutilated by the Arab attackers who killed them, and only in 1951 were the corpses gathered. By that time, it was possible to identify only 23 of the bodies conclusively.
The chief rabbi of Jerusalem at the time, Tzvi Pesach Frank, ruled that the identification of the remaining bodies would be determined by the Gra lottery, and the task was assigned to the revered Jerusalem sage Rabbi Aryeh Levin.
The identification took place in Levin’s beit midrash, in the presence of representatives of the bereaved parents. Twelve candles were lit, the Bible was opened at random seven times and Rabbi Levin ruled that as they stood in front of the remains of each of the fallen fighters, the last verse on the page had to include the name, or an allusion to the name, of each of those whom they were trying to identify. “How amazed everyone was when one of the verses that first appeared was ‘The earth is the Lord’s, and the fullness thereof; the world, and they that dwell therein,’ a verse that [in Hebrew] begins with the word ‘to the Lord,’” which is abbreviated in Hebrew with the initials lamed-heh. “Moreover, to everyone’s amazement, every page spoke unequivocally. In the first verse they reached there was a specific name that clearly identified one of the fallen … One after the other … the identity of the fallen was determined.” (Quoted in “A Tzaddik in Our Time: The Life of Rabbi Aryeh Levin,” by Simcha Raz, who also provides the official minutes of the lottery. ) While a lottery was often used for private matters, here the lottery was conducted for the purpose of a decision of great public significance.”
https://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/goral-hagra-what-do-you-know-about-it