frumnlovinit

Ahhhhh the great debate learning vs. working boy!! As a post seminary and Bais Yaakov girl I do think that Torah learning is VERY important yet I do not look down upon someone who is working.

I think that there are many more aspects to a prospective shidduch other then is he learning or working.

There are the bein adam l’makom questions and there are the bein adam l’chavairo questions. For instance… Does he daven with a minyan 3 times a day? How does he treat is roommates/teachers/parents/siblings?

As other members have mentioned a boy could be learning all day every day yet lack crucial midos. While a boy who doesn’t necessarily have what it takes to sit and learn all day is out in the world making a parnassah while still maintaining a focus on his inner self. This definitely a debate that can go on for hours. But just like no 2 snowflakes are alike, no 2 people are alike so everyone needs to think about it for themselves. Girls, Think! Think, do I want a learning/ kollel boy because I truly admire what it means to sit and learn all day or do I want a learning/kollel boy because that’s what all my friends/neighbors are doing? Also do you know what it means to be in KOLLEL!?!?!

BTW- It is not an all or nothing kinda deal- what about the guys that learn half a day and then go to college/work the other half?