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yaakov doe: The Yated and Hamodia may have high standards when it comes to grammar, but their standards when it comes to content are lacking terribly.
2scents: I’m not talking about dancing, just seating. I’ve been to plenty of weddings with mixed seating. At most of them, they actually announce “The dancing will be starting momentarily, we ask all the men to please move to the appropriate side of the mechitza.”
What is wrong with mixed seating?
Can someone please tell me, in a nice and simple manner, what is wrong with mixed seating? What are people scared it can lead to?
R’ Breuer zt”l was in favor of mixed seating for people who were looking for shidduchim. I’ve been told this before, and a quick search just now found this:
Rabbi Aaron Rakefet of Jerusalem has similarly been quoted as saying that those who eat Sabbath meals in mixed company should celebrate their weddings the same way. He cites the “revered Rabbi Yosef Breuer” as saying that “young people should sit together at weddings [because] mitzvah goreret mitzvah [the fulfillment of one commandment leads to the fulfillment of another]. We want people to make shiduchim [matches]. We want boys and girls to meet. We want dates to come out of this [wedding].”
My brother once told me a story about someone whose parents pressured him a lot. I don’t remember who it was with exactly – it might have been R’ Shlomo Zalman zt”l.
This boy’s parents wanted him to be the next gadol. They pressured him to learn all day. No time for playing – only for learning. R’ Shlomo Zalman heard about it and was against it.
Sure enough, when the boy got older, he resented his parents for it, and went completely off the derech. When R’ Shlomo Zalman heard this, he said, “Kids need to play. If they doesn’t play when they’re young, they’ll play later.”
avhaben: I was told by multiple Rabbonim that R’ Dovid Feinstein had mixed seating at his wedding.
I was also told that many yeshiva dinners (including Telz, Chaim Berlin, and Torah V’Daas) had mixed seating in the 1960s.
R’ Moshe Feinstein had mixed seating when he married off his children.
The Litvishe Kiryas Yoelite: I don’t think it’s the women’s responsibility not to dance if men are nearby. It’s the responsibility of the men not to look.
I think t**t a f**r letter w**d is not s**h a bad thing. We h**e words t**t are g**d and s**e t**t are bad. Ultimately, it’s up to the u**r to decide how and for w**t each w**d is u**d.
There’s a picture from when R’ Shteinman and the Gerrer Rebbe came to the US about 12-13 years ago, of R’ Shteinman and R’ Shmuel standing over an open sefer with the Gerrer Rebbe a few feet behind them. My roommate from yeshiva was there at the time, and this is the story of that picture:
R’ Shmuel Berenbaum had a question on the Ayeles HaShachar. When R’ Shteinman and the Gerrer Rebbe came to the Mir Yeshiva, R’ Shmuel wanted to ask R’ Shteinman his question. The Gerrer Rebbe was a few minutes behind R’ Shteinman in getting into the beis medrash, and was standing a few feet behind them (among the Mirrer bochurim), listening to their discussion – and R’ Shmuel did not know he was there.
After a few minutes of listening, the Gerrer Rebbe leaned over a bit and tried to offer a solution to R’ Shmuel’s question. R’ Shmuel, without turning around, said (and please pardon my Yiddish!), “Yunger man, ich hub g’fregt fun der Rosh Yeshiva – nisht fun dir!”
Buy mint oil and some cotton balls. Soak some cotton balls in the oil and place them in every corner, and at intervals along the walls.
Mice naturally run along walls because of their poor eyesight. They also have a natural aversion to mint, and will avoid it.
I have friends who got rid of mice using this method. They claim it worked within days.
Tap:
1. An EA is limited to doing pension work. The traditional SOA/CAS paths allow you many more opportunities for work.
2. It really depends on the company. I used to work for a company that allowed me to telecommute on Fridays and in bad weather. Some companies let, others don’t. Keep in mind that it’s never viewed as the optimal thing to be doing, so if the company ever has layoffs, the telecommuters will likely be some of the first to be let go.
i said so: I have a Bachelor’s degree in Mathematics. I received credits for one year in yeshiva full time, then 3 more years of being in college and yeshiva.
pba: Are you planning on coming late and leaving early again?
shmoel: Many rabbonim disagree with you.
As for PBA, if you are a Rav, then I pity the members of your kehillah. You dared to preach such hatred just before Yom Kippur? You dare to attack R’ Tendler? You, even as a Rav, don’t even reach his ankles in your knowledge of halacha!
shmoel: That’s RABBI Tendler to you. Rabbi Tendler is one of the giants. He was consulted on medical issues by many big rabbonim, including his father in law, R’ Moshe Feinstein zt”l. R’ Moshe described him in glowing terms.
pba: I don’t have a reason. But I’m not on the level that he is, and neither are you. When a big Rav says he’s a malshin, then you can quote him. Until then, it’s not for you to decide. R’ Tendler knows way more Torah and Halachah than you do, and I’d take his opinion over yours any day.
If R’ Shteinman did something controversial, people would be falling over themselves trying to fit it into halachah. Why? Because they realize that he knows way more than they do, and that chances are, he’s right and they’re wrong. It’s the same thing with R’ Tendler.
pba: then you have even more issues than I originally thought.
pba: And who are you to call Rabbi Tendler a malshin?
nishtdayngesheft: RABBI Tendler is a huge talmud chacham, and it is not for you to judge him. Personally, I disagree with him as well. That doesn’t give me the right to insult and degrade him. I haven’t heard any big Rabbonim insult him. Who are you (or anyone else on this site) to insult him?
shein: The letter is also printed in the sefer from R’ Romi Cohen, which has glowing haskamos from many Rabbonim.
nishtdayngesheft: I know all about R’ Cohen. He was the mohel at my son’s bris. My point was in response to shlishi, to prove that metzitzah is for medical benefit. These are not my words, they’re the words of the Chassam Sofer.
The Chassam Sofer also wrote, “However, we have no dealing with hidden matters if there is at all even the slightest concern of a health hazard.”
In this case, many Rabbonim hold there is more than even a slight concern. They, however, realize that there are others who disagree.
R’ Tendler goes a step further. He holds it is full-on pikuach nefesh to do it, and that is why he came out so strongly against it. Not out of disrespect, but out of concern. He feels that he is literally saving lives.
A few points: The Gemara says metzitzah must be done. It does not say it must be done with the mouth. It just says there must be suction. We learn that it’s done by mouth because the Rema says that you spit out the blood into the dirt. (Not that the Rema is not cause enough to do it!)
As for the reasoning behind it, the OU writes the following on their website:
The Chatam Sofer went on to demonstrate that applying cumin powder is also listed in the Mishnah as something done even on Shabbat, yet no one argues that only cumin must be used as a salve for the area. Since the Talmudic era we have found more effective methods of achieving homeostasis and protecting the wound from infection, and this is why halachic authorities do not require the use of cumin alone. Similarly, contended the Chatam Sofer, based on the Mishnah, no one could argue that the mouth alone had to be used to suction the blood.
12. This letter was first printed in 1845 by Menachem Mendel Stern in the periodical Kochvei Yitzchak. It is quoted in a number of secondary sources, including Rabbi Rami Cohen, Bris Avraham HaKohen (New York, 1993), 192.”
When I was in yeshiva, someone once wrote the following on the board:
1. Ein haTorah niknis elah l’mi she’meimis atzmo ba’avurah
2. Chavrusah o misusa
Moral: Don’t learn with a chavrusah!
zahavasdad: I realized that I only wrote half of the truth earlier.
Sarah Schenirer married when she was young, and got divorced. Some say that her husband was not frum enough for her, so she asked for a divorce.
When she was older, she married R’ Yitzchok Landau, a grandson of the Tiferes Shlomo. She was only married to him for a few years before she died from cancer. She had no biological children.
Did he give her a letter that said, “Wud u amry me?” Is that what unofficially engaged means?
zahavasdad: that is incorrect. Sarah Schenirer got married, and divorced.
http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/911-memories
Here’s my post from that thread:
I was in a small yeshiva in Brooklyn. I had davened Shacharis and was walking to yeshiva. I was at a light when I noticed a large, dark cloud in the sky. I looked at it and realized it was smoke. I just thought there was a fire nearby – but then realized I couldn’t smell one. I walked to yeshiva and someone there with a radio told me what had just happened. We ran to a store on the corner, where the owner had put out a small TV to see the news. We watched for a bit, then went back to yeshiva. The Rebbe told us we would start seder as normal, but we should have in mind that our learning should be a merit to those in downtown Manhattan. We couldn’t concentrate on our learning very much, and the Rebbe noticed. He spoke about it for a few minutes, then told us that if anyone wanted to go be with their families, he understood. We went to the store again, and saw that the towers had collapsed.
I saw on the TV the smoke cloud that was enveloping the area. My father works near there, so I immediately tried calling him. There was no answer on his phone. I called my mother, and she told me that she’d spoken to him, and he was walking home over the Brooklyn Bridge. She asked me to go home and meet him, as she didn’t know what he’d be like. I went home, and found that my father was already there.
He told me that someone in our neighborhood worked in the WTC, and was missing. Another neighbor’s brother had been on one of the planes. I was friends with the son of one of them, and knew his father. To this day, thinking of it chokes me up.
The rest of the day? We stayed glued to the news, hoping to hear that the people we knew were found, that they were ok. Unfortunately, it was not to be.
Because tznius has gone overboard.
Last year, a few web sites posted videos of Selichos in the Carlebach shul. One site also posted old videos of when Shlomo was alive and leading the selichos.
A friend of mine told me he loves going there. He says the energy is amazing there, and he feels uplifted. I don’t understand it.
If you watch the videos of selichos in the Carlebach shul, they are singing and dancing much of the time. This is not what selichos are about! We shouldn’t be dancing, we should be crying! Is this how you approach Hashem for the Yomim Noraim, with dancing? We’re supposed to approach humbly, knowing that we did wrong. We should be terrified! How could people dance?
iced: It’s not some yodle. R’ Teitz is one of the biggest Rabbonim in America today, and is widely respected by other Rabbonim.
iced: Please don’t use Oz Vehadar Levusha as a source. As we discussed here not too long ago, many Rabbonim do not approve of that book.
Sam2: There’s a good chance it is. Like I said, I tried to post the name, but the mods wouldn’t allow it.
vochindik, I tried to post the name of the Rav, but the mods wouldn’t allow it.
oomis: What if you were in a community where women only covered to the tops of their elbows? I’ve been in a shul where I saw the wife of the Rav wearing sleeves that only went to the tops of her elbows, with most of the elbow uncovered. Oh, and the Rav is a very widely known and respected Rav. If I posted his name here, probably 90% of the posters would know who he is.
No soap radio!
Satan is a malach. It has no free will of its own, it can only do the job Hashem gives it. The job of the Satan is to get people to do wrong. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. The Ramban writes that it is because we have the choice to do bad that we can be rewarded for doing good. If we could only do good, then what is the big deal about it? It’s only when we can go either way, and we choose the good, that we can be rewarded for it.
Saying something is maaseh Satan doesn’t mean that Satan has independent powers. It simply is doing its job. Sometimes it tries to disguise things as good, when they really are bad. This was the Gra’s opinion on chassidus, and it’s the Satmar view on Zionism and Israel. It still comes from the Satan. It is just doing the job Hashem gave it.
Wait!!! I have it!!! Let’s just get Bill Gates to give billions of dollars to the yeshivos!!!
After all, if you’re assuming that people with money will fall in line with your ideas, why aim small? Shoot for the clouds!
Unfortunately, Edon was eliminated last night. I’ve read that the judges and other contestants commented that Edon had great manners, was humble, and was always generally nice to everyone around him.
This is a huge kiddush Hashem for Edon. He showed that a frum Jew, even in a situation where many others slip and fall, stayed true to his values, and did not allow it to change him.
mogold: I did not say anything against the Satmar Rebbe in my above post. I merely questioned the story, and also questioned the idea that the Rebbe is responsible for Jews being able to dress as Jews publicly in the US.
I personally know people whose parents were moser nefesh in the US in the 1920s and 1930s. True, they don’t wear a streimel, but they do wear a frock and a black hat.
I know plenty about streimels and when they are worn. I have many cousins who are chassidish, and know far more than you think. I am MO by choice, after growing up in a chareidi family.
As for making myself a laughingstock, honestly, the Satmar/Neturei Karta fanatics who post here are laughed at far more than I am, with their ridiculous posts about Israel.
What I’d like to know is how many people were more than just inspired. Did anyone on the CR actually go out and buy a new filter for their computer? Did anyone change the way they do things on their computer, and did the change last?
iced: Jews can openly be Jews here because of those who were here before WW2, who fought for it. They used to have to find new jobs every week because they refused to work on Shabbos. Some of them went to court to fight it. Eventually, people developed respect for them and their willingness to sacrifice for their religion.
The Satmar Rebbe confined himself to one area. Most Americans had no idea he existed. I wonder, why was he wearing a streimel if it wasn’t Shabbos? If it was Shabbos, how could his gabbai suggest he carry it?
mogold: First of all, Judaism does change – as the world changes, Judaism changes in order to keep to the Torah. Torah shebaal peh was written down because the world (and people in it) were changing.
Chassidus as a whole was a change – that’s why so many Rabbonim opposed it. As long as we stay within the rules, change is not a bad thing. Reform seeks to abolish the rules. They say the Torah was not written by Hashem. Obviously, frum Jews don’t believe that.
The Satmar Rebbe was a daas yochid. As for his “success”, let’s measure it now. 2 brothers, who fight over the dynasty. Why? Because of the money involved. It’s to the extent where on their father’s yartzeit, they can’t go to the cemetery at the same time. The last time they did, fighting broke out in the streets. Satmar chassidim are leaving Monroe and Williamsburg by the hundreds, not interested in living that lifestyle anymore. Some of their newer areas, such as in Monsey, have changed. They don’t hold to the strict standards that their grandparents did. They have changed.
On the whole, Satmar as R’ Yoel founded it is dying.
My shul only says it in the winter.
Health: I find it funny that you use Eilu v’eilu regarding military service, but refuse to acknowledge it regarding the existence of the state.
Once again, schar in this world does not necessarily mean having money. Someone can be completely broke in this world and still be receiving plenty of schar.
I’m sure that the beis din shel maalah took Shlomo’s tzedakah giving into account in his final din v’cheshbon – just as they took his inappropriate actions with women into account.
Englishman: you’re stretching to try and make this fit.
RoB: as I stated before, I’m not attacking his music or saying you shouldn’t listen to it. R’ Moshe zt”l paskened that it isn’t a problem, and that’s enough for me. Saying that he must be a good person because his music took hold so well doesn’t make sense – plenty of bad people had things that became popular as well.
Did he accomplish good? Yes, he did. But he also did a lot of bad things. All I’m saying is to actually look at the while picture, not just the parts that look good.
One guy once told me, “It’s Carlebach’s yartzeit this week! We should all try to live the way Shlomo did this week, because he lived his life on such a pure, high level!”
I responded that fine, I’ll go to this guy’s house and start kissing his wife, because that was what Shlomo did – and it was such a pure, high level! He wasn’t amused.
avhaben: Wrong! He said he disagreed with the government, but that he has nothing against the existence of the state itself.
rabbiofberlin: I have a relative who went to a Carlebach concert when she was young (this is going back close to 40 years). At the end of the show, Carlebach came up to her and tried to hug and kiss her. She refused and backed away from him, telling him, “I’m a frum girl, I don’t touch men!” He tried to persuade her to let him hug and kiss her, but she refused.
Hugging and kissing strange women is sinning with them. That was all I meant. Yes, there have been allegations of worse, but I haven’t heard any proof, so I’m not addressing those at all.
Carlebach was a hippie, not a Rabbi.