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Yes, the number is astounding. But I suspect that that is one more thing we have in common with the Catholic Church – we are seeing cases reported now that took place over a long time, ten to twenty years.
Your premise is that women don’t know how to drive, and that is the problem?
– – no, my premise is the concern for women working with men in close quarters, and traveling together in the small ambulance back and forth to the hospital. At the same time, the patients are more sensitive to who examines them. In all seriousness, this may work. A call goes out, woman or girl patient, a woman with medical training goes to the scene (of course whichever EMT arrives first will begin the evaluation) and after the exam and the patient is loaded to the ambulance, the woman EMT can leave.
Also, if we are concerned that the ambulance crew may hesitate to take a call on Shabbos if they are not going to return home, shouldn’t we also be concerned that a woman may not want to call Hatzala if she will be treated and examined by men? This is a very real situation. I know at least one young mother, with a high-risk pregnancy, and travelling from the Rockaways to a Manhattan hospital, who said if she went into labor on YomTov she planned to call a car service rather than Hatzala.
There are many women with medical training – why not allow women to be first responders, to examine and stabilize a woman patient, and let the men take over for transport to the hospital?
Century 21 has a good selection of linens and some housewares, at very good prices. (I haven’t checked the Brooklyn store)
Oops! I thought you said od Avenue I, another subway stop defaced.
imho, we are missing another opportunity. The numbers gap between young men and women isn’t really all that large. There are many young (and not so young) men that are fine human beings, but lacking in polish, social skills or confidence. They may make someone a fine husband, but they are a crummy date. How about starting an initiative to provide coaching and counseling?
Many of the finance websites, like smartmoney have social security calculators. The Wall Street Journal also has some good advice. Basically, if you live to a ripe old age you would do better collecting at age 70. (maximum benefits and no earnings deduction)
Any earnings, even after retirement, will increase the benefit you are eligible for. If your spouse also works, there are ways to use both benefits to your best advantage.
I also work among non-Jews, in an office setting. We are friendly, even sociable. When you add up the hours we spend there, compared to waking hours with family and friends, it is quite a lot. Friendly, but it ends when the business day is over. Lunch only with the same gender (except for a farewell luncheon for a retiring co-worker, very rare and with a group). Like I said, business hours only. If you feel more vulnerable, you can be strictly formal as needed.
There is an issue with paying excessive ransom, that may encourage more kidnappings. But at this time, the more important precedent may be that Gilad is returned alive and well. I do agree with this deal on one major point – one of ours is worth a thousand of theirs.
Part of being homesick is missing friends and family, and what may make it worse is feeling lonely. Does she have friends there? I was also there at that age, and the group was wonderful, but some of them stick to the friends from home and are not welcoming to new faces. Does she have family or people from home to connect to? (I can loan you a few) Many of the seminaries refer the girls to chessed opportunities, with families with small children. Talking to girls I know there, it seems that there are so many young married women originally from America. Wouldn’t it be a good idea to establish an alumni association for each of the American schools, TAG, Bais Yaakov, etc, to provide a support group for the girls from their neighborhood who come for seminary?
I have a friend who, after several years of dialysis, was told that her best chance for health and more years of life was a transplant. Two adult children were prospective donors. The daughter stepped forward, since she was childless after 10 years of marriage, and said “Why should my brother travel a long distance and leave his family to donate, this is my chance to give.” The transplant went well, the recipient felt better immediately, and the donor’s recovery was a little slower. (she did, after all, undergo some serious surgery.)
You can guess the punch line – a year later, the donor gave birth to a healthy baby boy. I’m not suggesting that the results are always this good, but it is a tremendous gift. It is entirely a personal decision, and if you decide to go ahead, it should be a brocha for you and your family.
ameswalker website has their own brand, and prices are good.
If a family member is OTD, we need to express our disapproval and disappointment, but with a friend or acquaintance, we can be more open-minded and welcoming.
I have several acquaintances who are from the former Soviet Union, with very little contact with yiddishkeit before they came here. Anyway, I tell them that Judaism is something that is their birthright, and they should make it a part of their life. I encourage them to light Shabbos candles, and make Shabbos special. Restrictions and limitations can follow later.
Here is an excerpt from the Star-K discussion:
All food must be fully cooked and placed in the oven before Shabbos. No food (cooked or non-cooked) may be placed in the oven on Shabbos to re-warm or cook. This is true regarding ovens, as well as warming drawers.
It is the opinion of Rabbi Heinemann that on Shabbos, for a thermostatically controlled oven that is running (as opposed to one shut off by timed bake), the door may be opened once at any time and all the food removed at that time. The oven may not be used any further for that Shabbos.
(btw, Itche, my oven also has a 12 hour cutoff. I turned it off so that I can leave the oven on over a Yom Tov.)
Note the name. I’ll admit to being middle-aged.
1.Most women look for a sheitel close in appearance to the way they look in the mirror.
2.The most unnatural look for an older face is a sheitel that is too dark. If we don’t choose to wear gray, a softer color hair is a lot more flattering.
Try these:
Mrs.Ploni is such a gossip – “Mrs.Ploni is so nice to me and is always interested in what I’m doing”
Zone out – don’t pay attention, and if you’re called on, say, “sorry, I didn’t hear what you were saying”
Change the subject. Mr.Ploni leaves his yard and sidewalk so messy. – “Did you notice that it’s starting to rain outside?”
How about a little empathy for your date? Think of him as a new friend, who is probably a little nervous and unsure of himself. Your job is to show some interest, ask a few questions, and make a stranger feel a little more comfortable.
For all the good reasons not to show affection in public, are we also careful about showing anger??
This person’s age matters a lot. It is a normal instinct for a child to deny raiding the cookie jar, wearing a crumb mustache. Can you find some examples of people who are trusted because they tell the truth, and point out how lying erodes trust and respect?
It seems that most of my generation are more religious than the way they were raised – think dress style, entertainment, mingling with the opposite gender, etc. The question is, how much of this is with deep thought and conviction, and how much are we following the crowd? I have become more deeply involved in yiddishkeit largely for the values, the traditions, the sense of history – not to mention rejecting the popular depraved culture. Some of the trends, such as ladies dressing mostly in black for a simcha, or walking into a hall through separate entrances, I do with a little less conviction.
I know of a few instances (one case in particular comes to mind) where one side declined the shidduch because of what they felt was a serious difference between the two parties. A year or two later, and a little more water under the bridge, and they did reconsider and things worked out beautifully. You need to move on and keep looking. If this shidduch is right for you, it will happen for you when the time is right.
Funny, isn’t it, how the current system of resumes and qualifications before dating can work against us. Weight is not just a number. A girl with a few extra pounds who knows how to dress and stands tall and proud can be very attractive, but a checklist with a dress size will rule her out. My husband and I met when a mutual acquaintance saw two people she thought could relate and would like each other. We compared notes later, after we were engaged, and realized that we had a few more friends in common, but we didn’t match each other’s stated requirements, so they never put us together.
Anyway, I have seen many overweight girls get married to fine young men. You have the advantage here – you will find someone who is looking for more than just ‘arm candy’. (someone to show off)
Baked sweet potato. Baby fingers. And if the heartburn is really bothering you, check whether you may be able to use Prilosec. It did appear on Pesach lists in the past. Acid indigestion can lead to ulcers, and that is a hazard.
Pesach, aside from matzo at the table, is (relatively) easy. Go for all the non-gebrocht potato starch products. This past year, some of these bakeries are marketing a year-round line of foods in the supermarkets labeled gluten-free.
The question is, not whether you will feel good about the kids being there, but whether you want to be the one to say no. The only time I put my foot down, was when my ex remarried for the 3rd or 4th time, and the wedding was out of town. I told my teenager, “you’re not taking off from school to go – it’s not like this is a once in a lifetime event.”
If you are so sure that she is not lying, then go ahead and give her the money. On the other hand, seeing panhandlers in the subway, a few dollars on each car, then moving on to the next – a crooked beggar can collect quite a lot in a few hours. I am not so bothered by requiring those collecting to have some documentation, as by the way I am becoming hardened and skeptical and find it so easy to say no.
Try googling the song title or whatever line you know. (and by the way, there is a website savethemusic.com, that has thousands of Jewish songs in audio format)
Isn’t there a bigger lesson in this? Time that is wasted or lost is lost forever.
Try eating your meals on a smaller plate. Makes less seem like more.
20 pounds by Pesach is very ambitious, and maybe just a little unhealthy. Be happy with whatever progress you make in the right direction.
It sounds like you are sure that this is not the right time. You should have two different answers – for friends who want to set you up – just “not at this time, maybe next year” for your mother – “I am interested in getting married, but I need to take care of /resolve these things first.” Hatzlocha rabah.
I remember 20-25 years ago hearing rumors about shadchanim who acquired school yearbooks to check out the girls. The one possible benefit of sending a picture is that the shadchan may connect more with a person, and remember who you are, rather than just a page of factoids. But a very small picture may work better, presenting a human face, with less to inspect and analyze.
A child has a meltdown in the supermarket. Give the child a minute or two to express his feelings, then change the subject. “let’s go pick out some breakfast cereal” or “help me find the graham crackers” We need that kind of treatment too. Acknowledge what you are feeling, and then get up and find something else to do. Take a walk out in the sunlight. Sunlight really helps. Examine what is bothering you, and do something. example – you’re not happy with the way you look – take out the clothes that look the best, and put them on. You don’t feel you have any friends – look around, find someone else who is alone, and start a conversation. Any small step makes you a little stronger, and a little less helpless. Last, I’ve had just a tiny sampling of what biochemical depression feels like. If you need meds, stick with them.
You can keep score in scrabble by giving each player a book, and moving a bookmark. The page number signifies the number of points. The home where I saw this done used scrabble primarily for Shabbos entertainment.
There are some in my own family (older generation) who married first cousins. There have also been times in the past, such as communities of conversos (hidden Jews) where cousins married to stay Jewish. What’s wrong with it?
1. Absolutely, someone should have offered you a seat.
2. I was horrified, a few years ago, in a Yerushalayim shul for Megillah where there were so few seats in the ezras nashim that there were more women standing than sitting. Still, those girls who were early enough to chop a seat did not offer to yield to the older women who were standing.
3. Once upon a time, I was shopping with a coworker lunchtime, and the clerk gave me the wrong change. I pointed out the error and she took care of it. My coworker asked, “Aren’t you angry? She tried to cheat you!” I have just as often had a clerk hand me too much change as too little. Bottom line is, I need to count the change every time. But for my own peace of mind, I’d rather assume there was no harm meant.
Brooding over what happened in the past only hurts you. Learn from it – be more sensitive to other’s needs, teach your own children better middos, and if you really need a seat, ask. Sometimes people are just too self-absorbed (or too intent on the davening?) to notice.
Yes, tell them. Not too far ahead of time, and you don’t need to use the word ‘vacation’, just ‘mommy and daddy will be taking a short trip.’ I’ve always had a feeling that our children have a better sense of time, based on landmarks. You can say something like ‘We’ll be away the rest of this week and one Shabbos and we’ll be back the day after Shabbos.’
Related topic – if there is no practical aspect relevant to our own lives, should we be discussing how other people choose to live?
Is the problem really the college education, or the ‘college experience?’ There are (at least) two ways to make it work – the Jewish colleges – YU, Stern, Touro, or night classes. I took night classes at a community college several years ago. The student mix there were not a very high class group, but they generally were several years older, held down a daytime job, and took the college very seriously. None of that fun and games stuff going on there. If a full-time daytime program looks like the way to go, our community is large enough and diverse enough that you should be able to find someone who has been there and can tell you what to expect.
Maybe there is a non-Jewish partner in the business? Whatever heter the store-owner relies on may not be good enough for you, but don’t be so quick to label someone else as a mechalel Shabbos.
Oh, yes! Take your money on a vacation – it won’t ever want to leave!
Try Daniel Silva and Alan Furst for decent thrillers and historical fiction.
Please scratch Rashi’s Daughters. They are an interesting read, but very (ahem) worldly and way to modern in attitude toward alternative lifestyles.
1- my browser of choice, Opera, cannot handle the new format. It freezes whenever I try to open YeshivaWorld. If I have to open a different browser window to view YeshivaWorld, I’ll be reading it a lot less often.
2- The new front page has a lot more information, but it is very very busy. I would prefer a heading with ‘Today’s top stories’ followed by all the rest. In any case, a date/time stamp on the stories would be a useful addition.