estherhamalka

IMHO it’s better to wear a nice denim skirt then a black skirt that is too tight and the length is ” just just”.

Ok I know I’m going to get beaten up like I did in the other thread, but I must make my opinion heard. Here goes: I dont beleive in any of this nonsense about clothing “making” you frum or not. I don’t beleive that we should put on a show,we are who we are and thats that. I DO beleive that clothing should be modest and cover what needs to be covered, it shouldnt attract attention. As for jeans or a jean skirt, well thats just the material,I dont think it should matter. If you are a decent,G-d fearing Jew who does the best you can and you wear jeans,them I envy you. You are doing better then most. We shouldnt look at people differntly because of what they wear. We should learn to look INSIDE the person because thats what matters most. I dont think after 120, Hashem is going to say oh,he/she couldve gone into Olam Habah but because they wore denim I cannot allow them in. Its what you DO. Not what you wear. Granted,when you dress like a shlump,you may be tempted to act like one, thats a different argument. If I can manage to do what I need to do and so can my husband who wears jeans,goes to shuirim,davens w/a minyan and is a G-d fearing person, then I dont think it should count for or against anyone. (For the record, hubby only wears khakis,not jeans,just because he doesnt like how they feel-they are very rough,but he doesnt not wear them for “religious reasons”)

Speaking of khakis,thats also in the same ballgame as jeans no,because it also not “yeshivish”, no?

So I dont think it should matter what you look like on the outside. Aslong as your are tzanua,and not like measure for measure,like the skirt is right under the knee. Imean really in the taam of tznius. And a man doesnt have to be dressed in black and white either. He should liook like a yid,w/his yarmulka on,and he should look neat and presentable. I dont think denim by itself is untznius or unyeshivish.

ItsJustMyOp-I am not stifling my kids at all. They go over their friends houses all the time,that we joke that we could use a personal driver to chauffeur them back and forth to allthier play dates. My kids are allinvolvedin extra cirricular actinides,each one in things that he or she enjoys. So thank you for your concern that they are being stifled. I dont mind them going out to ” get air” at friends but THEY MUST COME HOME AT NIGHT. and that has been my belief thru out this thread-that mom and dad can-should-get out for a breath of air every so often,but they too SHOULD RETURN HOME. I’m not against alone time. I’m against parents leaving thier kids behind.

And mike- you know what,after thinking about it, I decided that,yes, I do think I am a better parent because I have never left my kids. I can proudly say that until they were each 3 years old and went toplaygroup,that my kids were at home by my side. I never ever left them.not for an appointment that I needed for myself at the dr,dentist etc. THEY ALWAYS WENT WITH ME. It was hard,yes,but they are mine and I love them and I would never leave them. When they got older I would leave them AT BEDTIME- in pjs,in bed,with a babysitter. And nit just any babysitter. People I knew very personally. When they got engaged,I’ve been known not to go anywhere for a while till I found a suitable replacement. I would never leave them with just any one.

So then in conclusion,you parents don’t compare to my devotion as a parent. There is nothing more to say.

Shevy I hope you go away to wherever it is you’re going,and I hope you can manage to enjoy it just a bit,and that your guilt that you should be feeling,doesn’t affect the time you have. I also hope for the sake of your children that your car or pkane or train gets you there and back safely,fir you kids. Personally,I wouldn’t really care if it didn’t.

Yes,that I have taken them there in the past,don’t know how soon I’m doing that again…anyway,I’m done with this topic. I’ve said my piece and I’m ready to move on ( :

Mike,are you related to charliehall?

This was a cute thread that made me smile ( :

Wow! I’m shocked. I have no words. If you want,you can pass this info to those 2 moms- there are 2 shops in flatbush,I know you’re in BP, but anyway,these 2 stores have pizza pies for 8$. These are full regular size pies that you would get anyplace else. The first which I have tried many times and is fine (not the greatest pizza,definitely not the worst,it’s fine) is Divine Bakery and they are located on McDonald ave. Right off of kings hwy. And their phone # is 347-554-8114. The only thing with this place is that since it’s more of a bakery they don’t always have pizza ready and you have to wait about ten minutes for your pie.

The second place I haven’t ever tried,I’ve just seen their advertisements,they are more of a bagel store and they are called Appetizer,or something like that. They are on the corner of coney island ave and ave j. Maybe these people wouldn’t mind to drive a bit out of thier areas to get good,cheap,kosher pizza.

Mike-the kids can stay at savtas,that’s not the problem. The problem occurs when parents leave their kids at savtas for an extended amount of time. Of course savta is the best babysitter in the world. But savta is not mommy. And kids need to be home with mommy. And daddy. Yes, I do look down on people who abandon their kids to the grandparents. It botheres me.I don’t think I’m off base. I think I’m actually very on base. I take my child rearing very seriously. No I’m not perfect,but i do the best I can. And going away without my kids is not doing the best you can. Sorry. No way. If husband and wife need to reconnect,they can go out for an evening. If that’s not enough then a night alone is more then enough. A week is way too much. Imagine your wife told you,mike.I’m going away for a week so I can recharge…would that seem fair to you?she will argue that she needs time away from you so she can get reenergized and be a better wife when she comes home, would you accept that? I think it’s ludicrous. You want to recharge then you shouldn’t have had so many children so fast and so close together. We are not in a contest or a race. The kids you had dint have t suffer being left at savtas cuz mom and dad are so over worked and over tired from them. I repeat- you had them,they didn’t ask to be born. Now do what you have to do. For shame.

Hey chanie- whoever said we put our marriage on hold? All i said is that we put our thoughts of recharging and reconnecting ON VACATIONon hold until the kids are married! We go out on “dates” pretty often,and that’s enough to keep us going. My idea of recharging and reconnecting is actually taking my whole family on a trip. I love seeing their faces when they get on a plane,or see Disney world or other experience other treats. THAT recharges me. THIER FACES.THE LOOK OF WONDER. I love it. I wouldn’t even enjoy going on a trip without them. If they can’t come,you know what? I’d rather stay home WITH them.

Personally,I’ve been married almost 15 years. I have 4 kids,the oldest is 13 and the youngest is 4. I have never,ever spent a night away from my kids,unless it was to give birth to a sibling or to stay in the hospital with one of the children who was sick from the time he was a few months old till not too long ago…

Anyway,I am not a believer that couples should abandon their kids for selfish reasons,such as a ” much needed break”. I understand mothers need a break,hey,I’m human and I say those words often,sk I will go out with my husband for dinner,or a walk or an ice cream. But we come back relatively fast. We don’t go and recharge for days! By all means,take a break,but not a week long one. These are your kids. All they have is you. They didn’t ask to be born. You chose to have them and now you are choosing to abandon them for selfish reasons.how will that make you feel?

Imagine your husband came home one day and said to you, Shevy,I love you so much,you are the world to me,but I am going to Florida, upstate or wherever,with such and such because I need to rest up and recharge so that I can be a better husband to you!

You would flip,rightfully so,because your husband belongs right here,next to you. So do parents belong right here at home with their children. Husbands or wives don’t have the luxury of just deciding to go on vacation alone just cuz they need a break. Why does a couple believe that it can just abandon the kids to have alone time?!

You want a vacation,by all means,go,but take everyone. You can hire a local babysitter when the kids are sleeping and have a night out for a couple of hours. Or you can have a date night once a week and get your alone time then.

I believe parents have no right to just go away without their kids. My parents never did it to me,and I will never do it to my children. Hashem gave you treasures and you are willing to just let go of them for a few days for your own selfish reasons? I am not really understanding the logic. And I am also quite shocked that none of the previous posters called you on this.

Hey! I want a subtitle too!! Can I have one?? Pleeeeese??

Why don’t you look in the Torah times or the other free weekly magazines that come out-not the tv vues,there are a couple of other ones,I’m just blanking on thier names. They usually have a section of gmachs,maybe the Esra magazine also,or I know I just saw a list not too long ago of all different gmach,it was a few pages long,and I don’t usually buy mags or newspapers so I’m pretty sure they were free publications…anyone know what I’m talking about?

You’re so optimistic,eclipse! I love it!

Mods- why was this thread allowed through and a couple weeks ago when I tried to post a similar question regarding the Shwekey show at the Beacon,it wasn’t allowed through? As I recall,I asked for details to make me feel like I was there since the tickets were above my budget….what’s up with the picking and choosing??

Shticky guy- I speak for myself-I am what I am! And I am NOT Joseph! I am me. Plain and simple.

Can’t speak for the others,though….

So now there’s a RuffRuff and a RuphRuph? Come on!

Psach lilbi-I only said that like yesterday!

Just no. Not proper or acceptable. Shows you are cheap. Now is not the time to be cheap. Now is when you want to impress. Don’t spend above your means but for me, a guy who used a coupon on a date would be a huge turn off. You will have your whole life to be frugal and clip coupons. Just don’t do it now!

Well said BP Totty. Spoken like a true totty!

Ma chovoso-I agree wholeheartedly,and then some.

Now what? This is absolutely ridiculous. We have been out of school,we need to shop,we haven’t been plowed not even once,you can’t even walk out there…I keep hoping we don’t have any emergencies cuz no one can get to us if we did. Hashem yishmor.