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I think you have opened an important topic. It touches many aspects in our everyday life. whether doing things, which, would never have been done years ago, saying, reading etc.
I think the one thing that can help us regain that sensitivity is learning, whether it is Chofetz Chaim on Loshon Horoh or Rav Falks sefer on Tzinuus,or Shabbos.
“the importance of a bris NOT being on time!”
This is the heading. I assure you every Bris is on time! – The right time being when the baby is strong and healthy.
Don’t dream of pushing it. There was a yellow baby who was rushed to hospital bec. the Mohel could not stop the bleeding. A shame he had listened to the father who wanted the bris on the 8th day.
I know around where I live it has become way out of hand with families having a catered meal. The “birthday” boy and his friends are really not interested! Are you looking for an activity for 3 year olds or for mixed ages? Keep it short, as young children have a short concentration span. Balloon games, or singing games are ideas I would suggest.
Sorry I can’t recommend any groups. Finding a support will definitely help her. I would strongly suggest the lady has a blood test to check her vitamin D levels. I know a few cases that were helped – Lady had very low levels of vitamin D (one of the signs is depression) and improved steadily when levels went up. Hatzlocho
I think over and above emails and texts are hand written notes and if and when possible phone calls.
It is time to lay this matter to rest,together with sheitlech etc. The noisemakers have done thier damadge. Even though the halocho has been again established to be true and the worms kosher, mant people are turned off eating many types of fish and as Rav Belsky writes in his original tshuva, they will be saying “Zocharni es Hadogo”. Someone is gonna give din vecheshbon for the mess and pain that he caused to so many yiden.
When looking at “strengthening relationships” having independent quality time definitely helps. It is not always possible. Make an effort to do something extra to please your spouse. Ideas: an encouraging text, special prepared lunch, loving note in portfolio or lunch,etc. I think its those little things that can make a difference.
When reading your post I thought of Haman. He wanted Vashti killed because otherwise wives will learn from her to disobey their husbands. B”H we have the Torah, and no way does it say or imply that women are objects. The Torah brings many examples of Great Women.
What are you trying to imply?
No, No, No, the worms are the same from Brias Hoilom. Monkeys are the same, elephants are the same and the worms are the same!
It had been maintained (by some Rabbonim) that herring was a clean fish. The Eida Cheraidis checked fresh, pickled and shmaltz and were all found to be infested. (My husband was there)
Don’t even consider it! – We have no new monkeys, no new giraffes, no new elephants, and NO NEW WORMS! Everything was created at shashis yemei bereishis.The Torah knew of this worm and says its Kosher.
It seems that the Rabbonim in Eretz Yisroel have had second thoughts. In Our History Great poskim have changed their minds later.
I know That our Rabbonim have had the above Rabbonims decisions confirmed.
Daas Yochid: The Rabbonim of Kedassia (London) spoke to Rav Wosner and Rav Karelitz.
One of the most amazing experiences I had was when we got stuck in a traffic jam on the way to Yerushalayim. It was Mincha time and as you know darkness falls very quickly in that area. Our driver stopped on the hard shoulder and called to the other cars “mincha”. Within minutes cars stopped on the hard shoulder and there were wellover 2 minyanim of men davening Mincha on the hard shoulder. It was so heartwarming to see the mix of – sefardim, chassidim, kuppa serugas etc. We were all Yidden there to serve the Ribbone Shel Oilom.
As of yesterday Rav Wosner, and Rav N. Kerelitz have rescinded on their Ossur. After having been explained the life cycle of the anisakis and having read the Teshuva of Rav Falk (Gateshead) they came to the decision that it is MUTAR!
Rebbetzin Braunstein z”l said that as men have the mitzva of Torah so we have the mitzvah of Tzinuus. Are we going to give it up so easily Chas Vesholom?? Also consider if our Imohos were to come to us now, would we feel happy with what we are wearing or would we be trying to shlep our skirts down a bit lower, want to change our tights, and maybe even our tops?
I have a house and am B”H happy with my “palace”. My neighbour on the other hand is building another floor and extending his house. Is he more wealthy? I don’t know, but I know there is something special about being satisfied with what one has.
We also have to remember to give Tzedoko happily.
After the tragedy of “Assurei Harukai Malchos” the Malochim asked Hashem Is this Torah? and This the reward?? Hashem told them to be quiet because to explain what looks to us as a tragedy Hashem said He would have to destroy the world…
I heard the following Moshol:
A king was going to make a royal international banquet. For this banquet he wanted a tailor to make him a very special suit. He sent his servants around the world to find material. Some servants found in a small village in the far east special material which was cool in Summer and warm in Winter and had a very beautiful shimmer.
It was so expensive and so rare they manage to buy just enough material for a suit.
The king was delighted with the material. He invited tailors from around the world to join a contest and the king would choose the best one to sew his suit. A Yid won the contest and began the huge job of sewing this special material into a suit suitable for the king.
He worked weeks on his project and the king was delighted with his new suit.
At the banquet the king happily received many compliments. The Yid got his pay and was delighted that he was so matzliach with his project.
People around could not take the compliments they saw the Yid getting. They went to the king with accusations against the Yid: True the Yid did a good job but he probably took some of the material for himself. They contnued accusing the Yid to the King until the king arrested the Yid. He was brought in front of the king for questioning and protested his innocence. He was adamant that he had not taken any material. The king told him if he will not admit he is going to be killed. The Yid davened to Hashem feeling his situation was a lost case. He suddenly got inspiration and asked the king to bring him the suit into the little room where he was being held. He painstakingly took apart the suit stitch by stitch. He brought the material to the King and asked that the material should be measured. It was found to be all there. He could no longer so the suit back together again but he had proved his point.
Our world is a beautiful suit… We really dont want Hashem to take apart the suit
Intelligent – I really hope for your sake that now a year later you have it easier getting up in the morning.Just some ideas:
Make your days exciting – Fill your days with enjoyable tasks.
Do something with a friend – learning, baking, exercise.
Chesed projects.
You can be there to help eldely neighbours.
When people rely on you and you take it on happily you will be eager to get up in the morning. Hatzlocho
GARBAGE – Please change your user name. No Jewish boy/girl man/lady ahould call themselves that. All of us are above that surely??
Try doing a jigsaw puzzle together with your kids. It’s great.
Depending on the child: Play a board game together, Go to the park, Do grocery shopping together, go swimming, Baking. The list is endless. As long as you make the child important when doing a chosen task you will have gained quality time.
It is a nice thing to do if no one else suffers through my actions
I have an English nephew who got polio from the polio vaccine. VERY important: The English give a live vaccine and most other countries give dead vaccine which is a lot safer. The only thing I would advise is to check the date of the vaccine before giving. It has happened (on 2 occassions that I know)that doctors have had out of date vaccines!!
Can anyone help me please: My grand – daughter aged 7 is coming to me for Pesach. She is not diabetic but has a glandular disease and may not have any sugar. Because of her age she cannot have any sugar substitutes. I would appreciate any cooking ideas, and recipes please.
Wow, you are so so right. The stupid remarks I have had to “endure” in the last 9 months while undergoing chemotherapy is beyond belief. If those people would have given a little thought before saying, it would have saved a lot of aggro.
I worked for many years with special needs young adults. We had a delightful boy who became brain damaged from falling off his bike and hitting his head.
I always insisted my sons wore a helmet. When my son went riding without a helmet I did not let him use the bike for a week. He never again went out without one.
Don’t chas vesholom come to a matzav when you feel guilty and say “If only I had insisted on the helmet!”
I can’t believe this discussion is taking place. We need to give Tzedoko without any considerations. How we treat people Hashem treats us. We surely dont want Hashem to use a fine tooth comb on us to consider if we are worthy of His goodness.
Goodness, I think there are 2 different issues here. Many teens that leave the fold are suffering post traumatic stress and as a result leave the fold. The cause is usually problems with parents & Rebbes/teachers. Most families will hide mental illness with whatever and however they can. Unfortunately often ending with marriages that break up. . .
Your message is great. I think it needs to be expanded to klal yisroel who individually are all unique with their own kishroinos. Every individual is needed to make up klal yisroel. Everyone needs to feel important and reminded that they have their special tuffkid in life and can make a difference.
Have you heard the story about the man ?
Have you heard the story about the man who brought peanut butter sandwiches to work everyday? He was always complaining. He hated peanut butter sandwiches he would tell his co-workers.
“I’m so tired of peanut butter sandwiches. And the white bread is always too soft.”
“Oh, no! Here it is again, another peanut butter sandwich,” he would say as he opened his lunch box.
His co-workers pitied him and assumed that his wife or someone where he lived always prepared the same sandwich, day after day.
One day, one of the men said, “Why don’t you ask your wife to make a different kind of sandwich?”
To which the man replied, “My wife? I don’t have a wife. I make my own lunches.”
The morale of this story is that so often we, ourselves, are repeating in our lives what is unpleasant and distasteful. Oftentimes habits have set in and we don’t even realize anymore that something unpleasant has been set in motion, not by a stranger, but by ourselves. For example, I was uncomfortable sitting at my computer in my home. Why? Simply because the chair was not the right height for me. It would catch my knees at a bad angle and they would ache a lot after working at the
computer.
One day, I realized that I had the power to sit at the computer with a different chair. Of course, on some level I knew that all along. But habitual patterns had set in and so I never thought about replacing it. It was probably even less on my mind, as my husband was perfectly content with the old chair.
Once I took back my power it took me less than a week to break my habit and buy a really comfortable office chair at a discount office supply house. I love my new chair. The seat can go up and down, even forward and backwards and my knees really thank me.
Take a look around your world and see how many peanut butter sandwiches you are eating!
A little boy came up to his mother in the kitchen one evening while she was fixing supper, and handed her a piece of paper that he had been writing on. After his Mom dried her hands on an apron, she read it, and this is what it said:
For cutting the grass: $5.00
For cleaning up my room this week: $1.00
For going to the store for you: $.50
Baby-sitting my kid brother while you went shopping: $.25
Taking out the garbage: $1.00
For getting a good report card: $5.00
For cleaning up and raking the yard: $2.00
Total owed: $14.75
Well, his mother looked at him standing there, and the boy could see the memories flashing through her mind. She picked up the pen, turned over the paper he’d written on, and this is what she wrote:
For the nine months I carried you while you were growing inside me:
No Charge
For all the nights that I’ve sat up with you, doctored and prayed for you:
No Charge
For all the trying times, and all the tears that you’ve caused through the years:
No Charge
For all the nights that were filled with dread, and for the worries I knew were ahead:
No Charge
For the toys, food, clothes, and even wiping your nose:
No Charge
Son, when you add it up, the cost of my love is:
No Charge.
When the boy finished reading what his mother had written, there were big tears in his eyes, and he looked straight at his mother and said, “Mom, I sure do love you.” And then he took the pen and in great big letters he wrote: “PAID IN FULL”.
clearheaded: See if you can buy an electric crepe maker.I got mine a few years ago. It was not expensive. I can make 6 crepes at a time (sitting down) in a matter of minutes!
The other short cut I use is to cook in foil containers. I use the extra heavy duty foil. I can cook 2 chickens in each container so I can cook chicken for YomTov – pack it away in the container (in the fridge or freezer)I can warm chicken in the container and then chuck the container when finished. I do the same for fish. It also eases fridge space. I definitely would not recommend it for year round as I know its not healthy but wow for Pesach it makes life in the kitchen so much easier!
Hatzlocho and have a great Yom Tov.
1. Go to an old age home and adopt one of the patients
2. Help a family with a special needs child and give parents some respite
3. Join a bikkur choilim rota and go visit the sick.
4. Are there any elderly people who live near you who could benefit from your visiting?
5. Go learn first aid
Good Luck. I think it is important for you, to find something to do that appeals to you so that you will enjoy your free time!
There is an elderly lady who lives here in England. She was in Aushwitz and worked by the ovens. She miraculously escaped and survived that terrible gehenim. She talks very little about her experiences. She does however impress the importance of eating melavah malkah. She says she could see on the remains of people who ate melavah malkah their luz bone survived.
LEARN TO LISTEN
Opportunity sometimes knocks very softly
I prefer that students (especially boys!) begin at an earlier age, which I explained to Robby. But Robby said that it had always been his mother’s dream to hear him play the piano. So I took him as a student. Well, Robby began with his piano lessons and from the beginning I thought it was a hopeless endeavour. As much as Robby tried, he lacked the sense of tone and basic rhythm needed to excel. But he dutifully reviewed his scales and some elementary pieces that I require all my students to learn.
Over the months he tried and tried while I listened and cringed and tried to encourage him. At the end of each weekly lesson he’d always say, “My mom’s going to hear me play some day.” But it seemed hopeless. He just did not have any inborn ability. I only knew his mother from a distance as she dropped Robby off or waited in her aged car to pick him up. She always waved and smiled but never stopped in. Then one day Robby stopped coming to our lessons. I thought about calling him but assumed, because of his lack of ability, that he had decided to pursue something else. I also was glad that he stopped coming. He was a bad advertisement for my teaching!
Several weeks later I mailed to the student’s homes a flyer on the upcoming recital. To my surprise Robby (who received a flyer) asked me if he could be in the recital. I told him that the recital was for current pupils and because he had dropped out he really did not qualify.
He said that his mom had been sick and unable to take him to piano lessons but he was still practicing. “Miss Hondorf…I’ve just got to play!” he insisted. I don’t know what led me to allow him to play in the recital.
Maybe it was his persistence or maybe it was something inside of me saying that it would be alright.
The night for the recital came. The high school gymnasium was packed with parents, friends and relatives. I put Robby up last in the program before I was to come up and thank all the students and play a finishing piece. I thought that any damage he would do would come at the end of the program and I could always salvage his poor performance through my “curtain closer.”
Well the recital went off without a hitch. The students had been practicing and it showed. Then Robby came up on stage. His clothes were wrinkled and his hair looked like he’ run an egg-beater through it.
“Why didn’t he dress up like the other students?” I thought. “Why didn’t his mother at least make him comb his hair for this special night?”
Robby pulled out the piano bench and he began. I was surprised when he announced that he had chosen Mozart’s Concerto #21 in C Major. I was not prepared for what I heard next. His fingers were light on the keys, they even danced nimbly on the ivories. He went from pianissimo to fortissimo…from allegro to virtuoso. His suspended chords that Mozart demands were magnificent! Never had I heard Mozart played so well by people his age After six and a half minutes he ended in a grand crescendo and everyone was on their feet in wild applause. Overcome and in tears I ran up on stage and put my arms around Robby in joy. “I’ve never heard you play like that Robby!
How’d you do it?” Through the microphone Robby explained: “Well Miss Hondorf…remember I told you my mom was sick? Well actually she had cancer and passed away this morning. And, well….she was born deaf so tonight was the first time she ever heard me play. I wanted to make it special.” There wasn’t a dry eye in the house that evening.
I have a friend Judy who is so busy doing real things and always has time to help others. She took in a very disabled girl for 6 weeks to help out her parents. Ten years later she still has her. She works full time with disabled young adults and thinks nothing of bringing them to her house to give parents respite. She has always been there for me and so for many others.
Sorry I just realised you asked for cake recipes. I am sorry if I got carried away…
The best tip I ever got was to cook in foil containers. This is definitely not something to do all year round but once a year I don’t think it is so terrible. (Be careful to buy the heavy duty ones) I cook e.g one days fish in a container and then can throw it automatically freeing precious fridge room. I do the same with chicken.
My friend makes small meat balls in the soup, sometimes from chicken and sometimes from meat. She was looking to make something healthy and filling and non gebrokts. She then serves the main meal.She said she found the children were not so hungry. I am hoping to try that.
One night Chol Hamoed I fry shnitzel coated in ground nuts. _ That is a family treat. I usually bake shnitzel.
I buy Kosher L’pessach cake and cookies for the children. I don’t use them on Pesach but it sure gives me peace of mind for the weeks before Pesach. I know that it is quite pricey.
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I think we need to consider other questions:
Are you really waiting for Moshiach?
Do you think about Moshiach coming constantly?
Are you ready to leave your house if need be?
“If worms in fish posed a serious health hazard, one would have expected that Japan, a country in which raw fish are consumed in huge quantities, would have seen severe health effects.”
Actually there is a health problem with raw fish. Uncooked pupae of the worms can hatch in humans and the worm can enter internal organs and wreack havoc. if the person is lucky it will enter flesh and the area can be painful but the worm can be removed.In England the sushi bars have to deep freeze the fish before serving so that the eggs and pupae are killed.
My husband is “The worm man” in a heimishe kashrus agency in Europe. Our Rabbonim permit eating fish with anisakis etc. This is according to the Shulchan Orach Yorah Deah 84. There is nothing new about these worms, they have been since the world was created. In Europe this is no news as the anisakis are well known by us and we’ve been eating them for thousands of years. There is one important thing to know; these worms are kosher as long as part of them is still in the flesh of the fish. When he exits completely his status changes and he is ossur. Therefore one must preheat whatever the fish is to be cooked in before putting in the fish fillet or minced. That is to prevent the worm from making a complete exit. If the fish was frozen there is no need to preheat since he is dead and will not come out.
From time to time there is someone who comes up with the news that there are some Rabonim that forbid the fish with anisakis and my husband checks with Rav P.E. Falk, and with Rav M. Vaie who verifies that the Gedolei Haposkim agree that there is no problem. There was a notice lately that claimed that many poskim forbid anisakis, Rav Vaie checked with some of the poskim who claimed the information is false. One of the Israeli Rabonim that forbids the anisakis gives a hechsher on 2 fish shops in Bnei Brak. They have some goites that pull out the worms from the fillets. It is interesting to note that Bnei Brak is full of Rabonim and Roshei Yeshiva and nobody requires the fish shops to remove the worms!!
My husband recomends that anybody interested should learn one Y”D 84 “Hilchos Toloim”. You will be surprised how many of them are kosher!!