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On a shidduch date, I saw a couple who were waiting for the elevator. When the elevator came, the boy paused. The girl thought he wanted her to go ahead and walked onto the elevator. The boy stayed behind. Right before the doors closed, she slipped out of the elevator, looking confused. They sat down near us and he said its not tznius – yichud, to go on an elevator alone with a girl.
I almost burst our laughing!
I told my 3 yo daughter that I loved her so much I wanted to eat her up.
With tears in her eyes she looks at me and says “dont eat me! I’m not a cookie!”
Another time i told her to stop screaminga dn to be quiet. She looked at me and said “no ‘be quiet you’ me!!
estherh,
you are completely right. I admire your courage. B”H after talking it over with my husband and parents, i now have the outlook that I am bringing someone one shidduch clser to finding their basherte. It still takes me a while to build up the guts to redd a shidduch, but I try.
May Hashem grant you only good things in life…
After reading some of the posts above it seems that the topic here is insensitive comments to difficult situations. I have a story which was not a difficult situation, rather, an uncomfortable one in which i’ve learned a lesson.
I was redding a shidduch for a relative of mine. This relative’s mother told me to find out what the other side said first and then they’d look into it if it was nogeiah. Fine, i was a bit nervous as i was dealing with family (actually it was a relative of my then new husband).
The other side said it wasnt for them. I called back this relative and told them the other side doesnt think its basherte (dont remeber my esact words). This relative’s mother says
have you ever redd a shidduch before?
I said “I’ve set up a only a couple of people”
She said “i can tell” and hung up the phone!
Being new to teh family made this situation even harder and i wondered why i even tried! With the whole shidduch crisis, i would imagine that prospective parents could be a bit more sensitive to the shadchans feelings!!
Ever since then, I dont redd shidduchim as much as i’d like to…or should i say, it takes me too much time to build up the courage to work on a shidduch…
you know those horror stories where the info given is totaly wrong? where you imagine the shadchan must’ve read off of someone else’s resume than the one you’re going with? This happened to a close friend of mine. She is from a family where the shidduch goes through the shadchan and they did not knwo each other beforehand. This guy turns upat her house looking anything except like a boy sitting and learning. She went with him only cuz she was dressed adn refused to hurt the boy. She just hoped she’d be taken to a place where no one she knew would be there. Being the boy he was, he took her to a place where most yeshivish dates dont go. He kept making hints about how romantic the place was, how beautiful she looked…things that scared her completely. After a 4 hour date, she was dropped off at home.
They did not go out again….
on a date with a guy from out of town, he crossed the double yellow line by a busy intersection on the way to manhattan. I was horrified and terrified! I cleared my throat and quietly said “i believe we just crossed the double yellow lines!” At that moment a cop pulled us over. I was so scared! I felt so bad for the guy! He couldnt find the registration as he rented the car..the cop told him to check the glove compartment. He tried to get out of it by saying to the officer “i’m on a date and trying to make a good impression!” i dont remember exactly what happened next but a short time later teh cop came back and we left.