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iluvtorah–the pushing buttons point is very true.With parents and kids,it’s the same thing.
my block
1.my gmail/YWN CR
2.Aish.COM
3.Geni family tree(a relative just started it–beyond cool)
4. and 5. depends what project I’m currently working on.
(then there are the COBwebs…)
IMHO…
Best singers: MBD and Avraham Fried.
Best composers: Abie Rotenberg,Shlomo Carlebach,and Nochi Krohn.
Best young voices: Amit and Medad Tasa.
Yeah,the smoking thing is doomed from the start.It’s like a kallah promising to drop 300 pounds for the wedding.Some things you either accept from the start or DON’T START.
Different skin tones look better with different colors.
Im like “soft skills” and “staycation” best.
TMB–only 92 years!
By then,the guy will be way too weak to hurt me in any way.
I will give him his teeth,he will give me my fuzzy slippers,and we will live happily ever after.
Rome
What on earth??
Popa…that last one is PG-13.
Tzvi H.–in jail for what? Some people are arrested on totally false charges and are 100% innocent.
Shouldn’t this thread be closed?
Shabbos rest
TMB,if you saw a thread titled:”Juicy Loshon Hora about TMB,Come One,Come All!”,you’d agree there can be Loshon Hora here.Most people would be furious,right?
It’s not done terribly often,but it does exist in less obvious ways.
Anything derogatory about a poster is actually Loshon Hora,because the poster feels his “virtual” personality is being demeaned.Just look at all the threads…
Nachas,please ask your friend to find out if the question “what negative trait does he have”is permissible acc.to hilchos shmiras haloshon with regard to shidduchim.It doesn’t seem right to ask that.
It has a good reputation.My son went there just for summer camp,and had a rebbe (in the summer) who was fantastic.I don’t know about its school curriculum during the year,sorry.
What exactly is it about?
Rabbi Ezriel Tauber said in a shiur years ago: “If you have a strong urge to criticize someone…YOU probably should not be the one to do it.When it literally PAINS you to have to tell the person the necessary mussar,you will come across much kinder, and be more effective.”
THESE ARE NOT HIS EXACT WORDS,BUT THE IDEA HE CONVEYED.
He’s not saying the person doesn’t need mussar,but if you want to actually accomplish any good…you must consider your true motives.
Joseph,I thought “so right” was a “she”.
RuffRuff,are you also the BowWow poster?
Anyway,in my humble opinion:
All the halachos apply,just like they apply when you are speaking on the phone to someone you don’t know,or writing a letter to the editor about an author you don’t know.
Also,a person can “turn white” with embarrassment, even if others are not present to witness it.
Cedarhurst–the halacha is 92 days to be exact.I remember when they told me that ’cause I distinctly remember thinking to myself:Maybe in 92 YEARS!
What if people who are temporarily unemployed,or on required bedrest but strong enough to talk on the phone,began using the seemingly endless hours being bored/lonely/bedridden to make shidduchim phone calls?I just thought of it while reading this thread.
1.No
2.You’re right.
Tisch Pavilion(I forget which hospital)
vision of water (mirage)
Cute!
Here are the ones I asked to get the real scoop on personality/midos (during the years I helped people with shidduchim).
1.Have you seen the boy in a situation where he could have been JUSTIFIABLY upset or frustrated? How did he handle it?
2.If you had to describe him in 3 or 4 adjectives,which would you use?(then compare what other references used)
3.For learners:you must speak to chavrusos and roommmates.In the Bais Medrash alone, everyone is either “geshmak” or “aidel”.Or “mamesh a mushlum”(completely perfect midos).
Hope this helps a little.
See the last two suggestions in my post.Also books on Emunah.
When my mother was very sick and people were calling us kids with this cure and that cure,we didn’t know what to try first,etc.
My life changed when I received Chovos Halevovos in English RANDOMLY in the mail one day.
I opened up RANDOMLY to a page which said Hashem once used a POISONOUS BRANCH to make the waters of a bitter river sweet…from which we learn that even a “mistakenly chosen” cure can bring about an actual refuah–if Hashem wills it to be.
As long as a person is making carefully considered choices,he can be zoche TO A COMPLETE REFUAH.
After your wife works and takes care of your kids while you learn full time for many years…treat her accordingly.
blueprints:not on purpose!
Smiley-I don’t know what that word means,sorry!
FRUIT PARTY (TU BE’SHVAT)
This is just my opinion,not forcing it on anybody…
At night,we are supposed to think about that a bit,I learned.
Review the day in your mind,etc.If falling asleep exhausted,then can be done when traveling,waiting,etc.
Not to the point where it interferes with simcha,however–can’t get bogged down,just think enough to keep yourself in check.
Like reporting to your “internal mashgiach”,so to speak.
But DO NOT OVERDO it.People who go too far “get down”.
THOSE WHO DON’T DO IT AT ALL WILL NOT MAKE THE BEST USE OF OUR LIMITED TIME HERE IN THIS WORLD.–caps for emphasis,not shouting:)
day has begun
would flunk that
That reminds me of when I came in to Monsey from out of town to go out with a boy from….well,NOT Monsey either.He spent at least an hour driving in circles until I finally told him he should just park in the nearest parking lot,please.So we shmoozed until it was time to get lost again going back.Ahh…romance.I don’t know who felt dumber–him or me.I was all dressed up and stuck in a yeshivishe car,and he…well,there were no GPSs in those days,but still…
Perhaps one or more of these ideas are helpful for your friend?
Ask ECHO or MRA if they heard of your surgeon and what kind of reputation he has.If all agree on the surgery,get brochos from tzadikim in the most specific wording you dare to ask for,and you will then have some peace of mind…as you take out your own tehilim.Not easy…
May the child have a refuah shelayma.
Re: Mechanchim embarrassing talmidim,please read Chaim Walder’s People Speak #4.A few of those stories are on that topic and really drive the point home.
Re:giving someone mussar,it is always best to take the person aside.
As far as the exact loshon:that causing a person’s face to turn white (with embarrassment) is as if he killed him…I watched a parent pass away,and that is exactly what happens…so likening boosha to misa is not an exaggeration.
deal the cards
That wasn’t directed at anyone in particular;just a general thing.
fine,how are you?
I have a lot to share on this matter,but I’ve learned from other threads that unless a person really is involved in a matter,they will just keep on playing devil’s advocate until everyone is mad at everyone.So…may you never know all that I know the way I got to know it…And I will graciously exit.
What I meant is watching people who are good examples close up is just the most effective way to learn it.
I meant the women were told to GIVE UP THE KIDS.Completely.
And using the get as blackmail for the reasons you gave is just as wrong.(I know you were not necessarily endorsing it.)