dolphina

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  • in reply to: Telling parents about lifestyle changes #977361
    dolphina
    Member

    mdd – If I’m interpreting correctly, your response to 000646’s question (short answer) is ‘yes’. Is that accurate? (‘yes’ or ‘no’ will do)

    in reply to: Medicine to become a gadol #969805
    dolphina
    Member

    @VM

    totally makes sense

    But i’m going to go one further. I’m going to genetically engineer my next baby to ensure maximum gadlus. I hear they’ve isolated the gadlus gene. Should be a piece of cake.

    BTW – instead of drugs, how about paying the dude who goes to Amuka for you and have him pray for gadlus. Fewer side effects, and, i hear, guaranteed success. I think they’ll throw a rosh yeshiva’s daughter in for free too.

    in reply to: Medicine to become a gadol #969802
    dolphina
    Member

    Whether the child has been diagnosed with a condition that requires medication or not, this question is framed as if he needs to take the medication because if takes this medication he WILL become a gadol, and if not, he will NOT.

    There is no magic gadol pill. Many people with great skills are not gdolim, and many people have overcome many challenges and are.

    The scenario you are describing is no different from giving a teenager performance enhancing drugs so he will become a star quarterback.

    in reply to: Facebook Is To Blame For Rising Orthodox Jewish Divorce Rate? #935285
    dolphina
    Member

    why do people who say they are not on facebook keep saying what people on facebook do? and then what that causes….and with such authority too. wow. a bunch of clairvoyants on yeshiva world coffee room.

    in reply to: Facebook Is To Blame For Rising Orthodox Jewish Divorce Rate? #935275
    dolphina
    Member

    who was it that decided that anything in the world that, if used badly can cause bad results, is ‘assur’ because some people can’t resist temptation?

    Personally, i think it’s cool that i can see pictures of my friends and their families. Maybe i’m super-human and i am able to resist ??? (not sure what i’m resisting, but let’s just say).

    Facebook aside, if people spent more time worrying about their own issues and less looking around worrying about what everyone else is doing or wearing the world would be a better place.

    in reply to: Do Chareidim have to #931756
    dolphina
    Member

    The word is ?????

    in reply to: Who Is Really On Welfare? Basic Hashkafa! #927850
    dolphina
    Member

    To all those who imagine that wishing something were so makes it so: there was no medina in 1929 in Chevron.

    in reply to: How to stop a very, very stubborn case of lice #918464
    dolphina
    Member

    SATURATE her hair every night with olive oil. Comb through with a lice comb. Use a plastic (disposable) shower cap for her to sleep in (this helps the smother process). Cover her pillowcase/sheets with junky towels (the towels won’t help get rid of lice but will help keep grease stains off everything). Wash it out in the morning (mix dish soap with shampoo. the dish soap cuts through the grease. shampoo alone won’t work). Do that for 2 weeks. Then go every other night, then once a week, etc.

    The lice WILL go away (you can tell by combing); make sure you get the nits out too.

    If it comes back she’s being re-infested, as popa mentioned.

    Recommended to treat siblings and parents as well, otherwise you’re liable to end up on an endless merry-go-round of lice.

    in reply to: Y.U. Abuse Scandal and Cover-Up #913517
    dolphina
    Member

    My understanding is that many believe it is ok today as long as there is no physical evidence and kosher eidim.

    And not so sure on the physical evidence, since if a goy handles DNA and he hates jews he might mess up the results, so even then it’s iffy.

    in reply to: Giyoress or Not? #913629
    dolphina
    Member

    This is such a silly conversation. How do you know she’s not Jewish? Maybe her mother is Jewish and her father isn’t. Maybe her mother converted. Maybe her grandmother converted. Maybe both her parents are Jewish from birth and she just looks Asian. Maybe anything.

    So someone saw somebody who he guesses is a convert based on her facial features, and is SURE she wasn’t covering her hair (because he got a really good look at her head, and knows this for a fact) and is discussing her status as a Jewess. Shame on everyone here. You have no idea, and to cast aspersions egregious.

    For shame.

    in reply to: When is it time to divorce? #911997
    dolphina
    Member

    The thought of being alone is petrifying.

    You will only be able to leave (should that be where you are heading) when you realize that there are worse things in life than being alone. As long as you feel that that is the worst thing in the world the status quo will always seem better.

    I hope you have friends/family during this time who are there for you. Someone who has gone through a divorce and come out the other end could be an invaluable source of support and an excellent sounding board.

    Good luck.

    in reply to: When is it time to divorce? #911990
    dolphina
    Member

    Buster – there is no one-size-fits-all answer. And as you have likely garnered, many ‘suggestion’ simply mirror individual agendas. I am sorry you are in this situation. It stinks any way you slice it, and you won’t know you have made the right decision until you commit to one (whichever that is).

    What I can offer you as advice is not to consider your likelihood of getting remarried. You have absolutely no idea what will be in the future. You have to make a decision based on the now, and what you know for sure, and determine what is better. (that includes where/how you will live, your finances, if your work situation will change, as well as anything else immediate)

    To those who say ‘always’ or ‘never’ maybe your time would be better spent doing something else. In the worst case you are spouting harmful nonsense, and in the best case it is irrelevant.

    Buster – You are the ONLY one qualified to make the decision. People who know you can suggest or help guide. YOU are the one who will live with the consequences of this decision, and you are the only one who can make it.

    Best of luck, from the bottom of my heart.

    in reply to: Mrs. Husband Name #909669
    dolphina
    Member

    Women (aka non-males) are an urban legend. They don’t exist. So all you males (aka non-females) can go back to learning or working or drinking tea or whatever you do, and stop worrying about what women wear or if they do or should drive, or if you can say their names, or if you can shake their hands or talk to them, or if they should go outside. They don’t exist. These discussions are all narishkeit and bitul torah. Moving on…..

    in reply to: Boots Wielding Women #911191
    dolphina
    Member

    Please clarify the current rules of tznius (circa 2012): Is it assur to wear clothing that makes one look attractive? Is one supposed to walk into a clothing store and fine the most ill-fitting/ugly thing to wear that is loose and covers knees/elbows/clavicle? The line of what is/is not permitted isn’t clear to me, that’s why I ask.

    Also, at what temperature is it permitted to wear boots?

    in reply to: Free Government Programs #910222
    dolphina
    Member

    There is a distinction between legally entitled to and morally entitled to.

    You can choose not to work and be legally eligible.

    To anyone to whom the distinction is unclear, there is nothing more to say. One word of advice – those who do not see the distinction perhaps re-think their attitudes towards those who they perceive to be ‘less’ observant than they are, as their perception of their own observance might be a tad bit skewed.

    in reply to: Free Government Programs #910201
    dolphina
    Member

    The objective of any of these government programs is not to subsidize lives of people who refuse to work, or worse, manipulate their financial reporting so as to appear to qualify for said programs.

    Every time someone takes from such a program they are causing MY taxes to go up.

    Iced – you stated in another post:

    ‘Clearly, when the term “OTD” is used, it is referring to leaving the derech of Hashem and his Torah. Not merely or necessarily the derech of ones parents. That being said, it certainly can be said that someone who was frum and knows of the Torah will pay a very heavy price for leaving the derech of the Torah and becoming a Mechallel Shabbos and treif-eater. ‘

    There are more than 2 sins in the Torah. What kind of price does one pay for gezel? And how about systematic and repeated gezel? Since my taxes fund all of these programs, anyone who takes from these programs using your reasoning is stealing from me.

    I am not mochel. Not even a little.

    in reply to: OTD Phenomenom #907243
    dolphina
    Member

    <“Is suicide an “informed position” by those that “chose” it?

    OTD is the same. “

    As would argue Mullah Omar of the Taliban. But his answer would be ‘yes’, as long as you bring Infidels along.

    Not a very compelling statement.

    And to “It is NEVER an “informed” positon to go “OFF THE DERECH” OTD, it is an emotional response that is the cause of it.”

    I respond with: <i>’Uh Uh'</i>. There, argue with that bit of spectacular reasoning.

    (for those who need it: No, I am not comparing religions, I am comparing arguments.)

    in reply to: OTD Phenomenom #907209
    dolphina
    Member

    “No one will rely on asking the OTD kid. Several reasons.

    1. Who says the answers are reliable?

    2. The OTD kid is at least partly rebellious. That anger will likely cloud the judgment, and the real answer may be impossible to reach.

    3. The real issues are multiple even for a single case.”

    Who else would you ask?

    It’s like the joke about the little kid who never spoke (despite experts and therapist, etc). One day, at the dinner table, he said ‘the soup is too hot’. When asked why he had never spoken before, he said ‘the soup was never too hot before’.

    I will explain the obvious point. Only someone who is doing something knows why he/she is doing it.

    You can analyze the person’s answers, and, in context of the person, his/her environment, and what he/she says, you have a chance of figuring something out.

    However, if you’re not going to engage and discuss, but rather sit in an ivory tower and attempt to judge from up high, you may as well pack your bags in terms of any practical implications.

    eye-roll, sigh.

    in reply to: Cholov Yisroel V.S. Cholov Stam #903487
    dolphina
    Member

    @ Snowbunny – May I point out is that many people do NOT eat chalav yisrael, despite the comments above.

    There is no such thing as ‘not kosher’ milk that you can drink. If something isn’t kosher you can’t drink it. There is non chalav yisrael milk that you can drink, and it has an ou and is 100% kosher.

    If you are unsure if you should be following a CHUMRA or not (yes, it is a chumra), ask your Rabbi.

    In a general sense (Stating my opinion here) If you are going to ask practical questions on this forum, and taking the answers at face value you will be taking on an awful lot of chumrot that are presented here as obligations. Better to be informed.

    To juxtapose another thread here – I will opine that a great contributor to OTD-ism is precisely the attitude expressed above. Non-chalav yisrael = non kosher. Therefore if i eat a Hershey bar i may as well go have a blt.

    This is messed up, people.

    in reply to: Why do you think the Hurricane Sandy came? #906896
    dolphina
    Member

    Coming from the perspective that people in glass houses should not throw stones – Without debating the reason for any individual event – anyone who feels that any event that happens is due to behavioral shortcomings, should very carefully and very deeply do a self-analysis and address his/her own issues. I do not believe that telling other people how to behave is at all effective, although it is significantly more fun than changing one’s own behavior.

    As far as hocheiach tochiach – I don’t think I have the right to tell you to not rob a bank as i’m walking in to the grocery store to steal a sandwich.

    in reply to: Shocking Study of Modern Orthodox OTD Rate #941590
    dolphina
    Member

    A random statement: It impresses me how people state things they absolutely cannot possibly know with such absolute authority. Out of curiosity – how many angels can dance on the head of a pin? and if I have 2 pins, can double the number of angels dance? and….GO

    in reply to: Shocking Study of Modern Orthodox OTD Rate #941457
    dolphina
    Member

    apologies for my typo. I said Jewish Father. I meant Jewish Mother.

    in reply to: Shocking Study of Modern Orthodox OTD Rate #941407
    dolphina
    Member

    My personal observance and background aside, based on the unbelievably extreme judgement passed on everybody and anybody, by just about everybody and anybody (right, except for you, the guy with his fingers poised on the keyboard to hand me my head because he did not. right. you didn’t. ever.) I’m surprised anyone with a smidgen of self respect would want to be associated with the majority of the crew who comment here.

    And just so it’s clear, not one of the people posting here keep all the mitzvot (mitzves, mitzvos, mitzvois, pick your poison. no matter to me). so stop judging. just stop judging. You (except for you, guy ready to go apoplectic) have no idea the damage you are causing to people interested/curious in yiddeshkeit who see the vitriol directed at anyone who is a fraction of a degree off the observance trajectory of any given poster. It’s obscene.

    Last I checked commentators in this chat room were not given the keys to assess which are the ‘important’ commandments (see how i avoided the multiple versions? ha) and which are not.

    There are people saying that someone with a jewish father may not be Jewish. WHAT? and yet, there is actually a discussion posted on whether white collar crime is ok. (goes to ignorance as well as rudeness, judgment, etc)

    And i won’t even get started on the misogyny. Someone is divorced. Whose fault is it? Dumb question, the woman of course!!

    wow.

    I’ve been reading a lot here. It absolutely turns my stomach.

    This may be my one and only post. I had to get it out. This topic seemed apropos.

    Go ahead, comment away. I will not be responding. But if one person thinks before spewing his poison, I will have achieved something.

    Good night.

Viewing 23 posts - 1 through 23 (of 23 total)