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I don’t understand why there is so much emphasis on the actual “marriage”. Regardless of whether they are “married” or not they will still do their aveiros. The “marriage” isn’t a heicha timtzah to it. Why should it matter whether they are allowed to get “married” or not?
Just to be clear, I don’t endorse this aveirah chamurah. I just don’t understand why there is any emphasis on something that will not stop people from being oiver to begin with.
I don’t understand why I should care at all what laws goyim decide to pass for themselves, when the laws don’t affect me in the least bit.
You can do what me and my brothers did when we were wee little ones:
1. Unpack one set of clothing.
2. Wear it.
3. Everyday for two months.
4. Take a shower once a week.
5. Have parents tell stories about how you wore the same clothing for two months and almost didn’t shower the entire time for the rest of your life.
Methinks there are those who doesn’t recognize satire.
The CR is not known for its ability to recognize satire. I’ve tried a number of times. It went horribly. Horribly.
Girls are from much further out of our solar system than just Venus.
Outside of family I say “my wife” when referring to my wife, or “you’re wife” when referring to my co-conversationalist’s wife. Sometimes “his wife” when referring to another man’s wife. Don’t tell anyone, but I have been known, on occasion, to say “their wives” when speaking about a group of men’s wives. I kid you not.
oomis I feel that you’re comment is not realistic. It is not one person who will stigmatize such a child but the community as a whole. Divorce and death are common and natural situations where a child might lose a parent. There are thousands of such cases within the frum community world wide and even they come with at least a minimal amount of stigma. But children of extra-marital pregnancy by anonymous fathers would understand the events surrounding their conception to be entirely abnormal and become stigmatized on their own. Especially in a family oriented community like ours.
And is fulfilling biological urges a valid reason for anything? If men would fulfill their biological urges, Father’s Day would by quite confusing. As it is for other races. Is that acceptable?
I think it depends on what caused you to change your yarmulka. Some people don’t care whether they’re wearing velvet or those cardboard ones they give out at the kosel. To them they aren’t going up or down.
Children that come from Chareidi families that fall to the side C”V may change their yarmulkas as an expression of their falling. Whether you believe there is a difference in yarmulkes or not, in such a case, the kavanah of the child changes the status of the yarmulka.
I wonder why the R”Y won’t consider being mevatel the takanah of Rabbeniu Gershom. It would be a cinch to get those numbers evened out. Even pilagshim would go a long way.
I guess that’s why I’m me and not Rav Elyashiv.
Wolf:
Oh I thought you meant where he could make other people be oiver not just himself.
If ????? ????? told you to wear techeiles, couldn’t you also ask him if you are supposed to listen to him or to follow your own Rov?
Also I imagine that anyone who is on a madreiga that they are already getting ????? ????? would probably already know what to do in such a situation.
Wolf:
Can you give me the source that a navi is allowed to suspend a halacha for someone else on a one time basis?
A train! A train!
A train! A train!
Could you, would you, wear them
on a train?
The problem is not with the Hebrew. Its with the English.
Look at the English in Yeshayahu 53:8. “for the transgression of my people to whom the stroke was due”. It sounds like a Christian translated that. If you look at the Hebrew you will see that it should be something like “from the transgression of my people they were plagued”.
Look at Yirmiyahu 31:32 “I will put My law in their inward parts, and in their heart will I write it”. Again, this translation sounds like it came straight out of a Christian’s head. From the Hebrew it should say “I put My Law in their midst and in their hearts I will write it”. The meforshim there explain that ???? is “??? ????? ????” and really it should be read as future. But that is exegesis not literal translation.
My problem is that any Christian can come along and say “look even your Jewish Bible agrees with us”, because these translations just aren’t that great. I know that the Chabad site uses the same translation for Yirmiyahu, but at least over there we can argue that they are basing it on Jewish commentaries not strict translation. Mechon-Mamre’s thing though is “Bible and Mishnah Torah for all- Jews and Gentiles”. If they expect goyim to reference their material, then they should be more careful in their translations.
You are right that JPS isn’t technically conservative- its non-denominational. But calling yourself a duck won’t make you fly. Practically it seems to be run by Reform and Conservative.
…But tell me that wasn’t one of the funnier videos you’ve seen in a while.
I would’t rely on Mechon Mamre. Their translation is from the JPS which is a conservative publisher. I’ve even heard that the JPS’ first edition was mostly taken from the KJV.
Their format is nice and its great that they have everything readily. But the loss outweighs the gain.
Better to go with Chabad’s if you need a translation. Otherwise use the Mikraos Gedolos from HebrewBooks.org
I hear that most shuls have an in-house site situated right next to the seforim shrank. Usually these shul-sites have a Mikraos Gedolos Yeshayahu that comes with plenty of pesukim and meforshim.
There’s no charge on the site, but getting there can be a hassle and you have to bring your own mice.
I would like to wish you a Mazal Tov, but according to YWN I move too fast.
If my IQ hasn’t changed since I went into first grade than I know it.
Bar Shattya:
7 days of the week is not a jewish thing (except in ancient persia)
???? ?? ????? ???? ??? ????: ???? ??? ????
You can walk back and forth with kavan that you are being mekayem a mitzvah with every dalet amos that you walk.
That’s something you can’t do anywhere else.
I know what a blackberry is but what is a torch and what is a PDA and an app(le?) store? Is blackberry put out by Apple?
It depends on how much risk you like to take. If you’re the type of person who would go swimming with sharks because you’re pretty sure they won’t take a limb off. Well then you might be inclined to take the chance.
For the rest of us that don’t enjoy having our limbs surgically sutured onto our bodies, I wouldn’t recommend it.
I. don;t kno!w w/hat y”our”e t:alking about’
Well I’m afraid you’ll have to pay tashlumin by letting this one throught
Please don’t let this thread throught. The pain of letting this thread throught is too much. Think of the children. Throughting.
Where do I get my pin?
They’re right next to the throught.
Actually, I was just being sarcastic lishma.
But on a serious note, yes it is a fairy tale. There is some type of kabbalistic reason why women shouldn’t drink from havdallah that has nothing to do with growing a beard.
Also, I can’t source it, but I think that pouring water into the wine has to do with mituk hadin.
Does drinking the havdalla kos cause one to grow a beard? Does it do this to women too?
Yes. But most people don’t have the money to waste in boiling down the silver every week after havdallah, so practically speaking its just not worth it.
Women aren’t able to metabolize silver as well as men, so no.
amichai I’ll trade you position #2 for your #6 and an icecream?
I think he meant that to avoid having to make a bracha achrona you should never drink more than m’lo lugmov.
But if you are comfortable with thanking G-d for the wine that you’ve drunk, there is no problem.
2
I would say to speak to a Rav who can guide you in dealing with these types of thorny issues.
I would also say that you should respectfully ask your father to be supportive of you as you navigate life trying to find your place in the Jewish world.
I don’t jest.
But I noticed that the more sarcastic I get, the less people tend to realize I’m being sarcastic.
From the yom tov. Same reason everyone else was saying hallel and davening shabbos pesukei d’zimra.
Got back late from shul. Just made havdallah. Yayin, b’samim, no eish.
apushatayid:
Jer. 31:32- if you read the pasuk inside it is clearly talking about a change in the current Torah, not an addition to it.
“?? ??? ????? … ???? ?? ????? ????? ??? ??? ??????”
The Torah that was originally only in our midst, will now be deeper, it will be in our heart. The change is clearly spelled out.
Isa. 53:8- ask him to identify the ??? in the pasuk. If he says yoshke, ask him for another pasuk where ??? translates to “to him” and not “to them”.
He didn’t fulfill any of the nevuos that Moshiach is supposed to fulfill. If they claim that he said he would come back to do it, quote Devarim 18:21-22
My first memory? At what age is it normal to start remembering? I would be extremely impressed to hear of anyone that knows at what age they experienced their first recollection of a memory.
I think it is less tznius to wear these things. Just like wearing bright colors that call attention to you is not tznius, so too these burka things are so conspicuous that you can’t help but notice them.
If it was a Sephardi living in an Arab country where they already wear similar garments my opinion would be different. But here it sticks out.
I didn’t get that you were talking to me either.
And haha.
pac-man
Derech: Hashem made the decision that she should sin and do teshuva? That is what your comment seems to imply.
I think it depends on how much of a part bechirah really plays in any given nisayon. Where the nekudas habechira for a person is.
I’ve been taught to look at the past like there was no bechira, everything that happened happened exactly as Hashem wanted. My part is only in the present. Meaning before a nisayon Hashem tests me to see if I will be oiver or not. If I failed then Hashem wanted me to be oiver to see if I will do teshuvah or let it slide.
adorable:
if I was put into this nisayon and failed but I really think that it was too big of a nisayon for me so why is it my fault then that I failed?!!?!?
We can’t know whether any nisayon is too big for us or not. Hashem gives each one of them to us for reasons only He knows. Our job is to live in the present.
It’s assur to become depressed even when doing teshuvah. I’ve seen in brought down that real teshuvah that was done b’shviras halev, if it leads to depression and not happiness then it wasn’t a good teshuvah.
Whether the nisayon that you failed was your fault or not, your job is to be choizer and to put gedarim in place that it shouldn’t happen again. After that you should be happy that you were given the opportunity to perform the mitzvah of teshuvah that you would not have been able to perform before.
Everything that we are at this moment is exactly what Hashem wants us to be in order to test us for the next moment.
I’m not a homemaker or a mom. But I would say 2 years. At this age, they’re young enough to adapt to being away from their mothers more easily. At 3 I would think they would already be too clingy and not used to spending so much time away from their mothers.
We started at 1 1/2 since my wife works from home and needed the time to get her work done. But there were only about 3 or 4 other kids there.
How does the Chupa work in Eretz Yisroel? A few posters mentioned it is done differently.
I got married in E”Y. In the hall that I got married in, the chuppah was outside with the men on one side of it and the women on the other. After the baddekin the men escorted me outside to the chuppah and packed to one side of it. Then the women came and filled up the other side. My formerly-soon-to-be-wife came down with her mother and mine from between the women. My wife wore a tznius gown and sheitel the whole time. Family wore regular Shabbos clothing, although bought new.
The shape of the hall made it so that when we left the yichud room, we parted ways and I couldn’t have seen how she was greeted by her friends at all.
I’m not chassidish. I’ve been to a couple of chassunahs here over the years. As far as I know, this is how everyone does it here.
how can not being innocent be a good thing? i understand that the growth that you got from it could be good but how can that specific aspect be viewed as something good that happened to you?
I don’t think “innocence” is a Jewish concept. There are two types of tzaddikim: A tzaddik gamor and a ba’al teshuvah. A tzaddik gamor isn’t poiretz gedarim and oiver aveiros and a ba’al teshuvah is. Both have ma’alos and chesronos.
Don’t romanticize the problem as “losing your innocence”. Understand that you went from being a tzaddekes gemurah to a ba’alas teshuvah in one of the mitzvos or one of your middos. You lost certain ma’alos and you gained other ma’alos.
It’s on Hashem to decide whether He wants you to be an apple or an orange. He made His decision. Have bitachon that He made the right one.
I don’t think it’s so surprising that there might be some small similarities between Hebrew and Indo-European languages. We have spent some time over the years in those countries.
Try and find some similarities between Hebrew and East Asian languages like Japanese and Chinese. That would be impressive.
oomis:
Derech Hamelech, there is more kedusha in both parents attending their daughter’s granduation and ELEVATING the occasion to one of kedusha, than trying to eliminate an entire 50% of parents from attending. What if the girl HAS no mother? What if she has NO female role model that will stand up when she walks in and clap for her with nachas?
How are you defining kedusha? Kedushah comes from the word to “separate”. How is there “separation” in your proposal?
The way to “ELEVATE the occasion” is by making it “separate” and by extension kadosh.
Your case of a girl who has no mother is not a way to make a rule. Most girls that are graduating have mothers. In extenuating circumstances, where one or two girls in the class don’t have a mother a school might be convinced to quietly bring in the father and have him sit off to the side behind some sort of mechitzah.
But you can’t make a rule that sacrifices all the fathers’ ruchniyus for the sake of one or two girls.
The sarcasm seems to end in the last paragraph.
What I meant to say was that people are squandering the opportunity to emphasize the importance of kedusha in the machaneh by teaching them that their graduation ceremonies are more important.
The way I see it, we could be showing our children that even during such wonderful accomplishments we are still an a goy kadosh and act accordingly.
DY:
No they’re not. You just have to read it with the right inflection. Try using “sarcasm” while reading all four paragraphs.
I totally understand where these parents are coming from. As Jews who focus on how to raise our children to best serve Hashem,the graduation ceremony is an important part of chinuch banos and we need to emphasize its importance to our children so that they will grow up recognizing that these are the things that Hashem wants from us.
Why don’t people really understand “???? ????? ????”? That ????? which comes from the word meaning “separate” can only come to those who separate themselves in moderation. There needs to be moderation. The ???? clearly meant that we should only separate ourselves, sometimes not always- moderation is the key.
The biggest proof that ????? is only in moderation is because that is what a chassidishe BY does and what some people did growing up. And other such stories. Obviously if they did it, it must be the correct thing to do.
I hope that parents in this situation will not squander the opportunity to teach their daughters about the importance of the graduation ceremony, by staying out of the ceremony to emphasize them that ????? is important to klal yisroel. I really worry about these peoples’ skewed priorities.
gefilte is an adjective. tuna is a noun.
and Mod80
just spray a little chrayonaise in the water. They love that stuff
I’m particularly fond of expressing myself in as many words as possible. I give myself extra points for redundancy and I give myself extra points for repetition.
I thought albatross was a type of tuna fish. The lighter one.