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squeak, what are you squeaking about? What do you mean?
BP Totty, you are 100% correct!
You only have one head. Protect it.
Nope. I was just saying it was.
I think most of the jokes here are not “our own”. Just passing on the best (or sometimes not so best…)
Here’s one of them:
Lakewood, NJ – A father was charged with child neglect today (two days ago —EDITED by d a) after police say he left his 9-month-old in a car for more than an hour and a half on an afternoon when temperatures reached into the high 80s.
The child was found unresponsive and suffering from heat exposure in the back seat of a car on Ocean Avenue. First aid responders were able to revive the baby, who was further treated and deemed in stable condition at Kimball Medical Center, according to police.
The father told police that he was supposed to drop off the child at a day care center but forgot the infant was in the car and went straight to the learning center he attends, at 145 Ocean Ave.
About an hour and 40 minutes later, his wife called him and asked about their child, prompting the father to check his car, where he found the child in the car seat, according to police.
Members of the school then called emergency responders, including Hatzolah First Aid. The father was arrested and charged with fourth-degree child neglect. The infant was eventually moved to Monmouth Medical Center in Long Branch for further observation.
Here are some tips to keep kids safe around cars:
*Never leave a child unattended in a car. Not even for a minute.
*Warn your children about playing in and around cars.
*Get your kids out of the car first, and then worry about unloading the groceries and items out of the car.
Eric Holder denounced Arizona’s law as unconstitutional while admitting he hasn’t read it. He’s read the law; it’s the Constitution he hasn’t seen.
(This doesn’t really belong in the Jokes thread, it is very sadly true)
I’m sleeping…in my dreams!
When my brother was 7 years old, he had a dream that my father met him in the hallway leading to his room and my father handed him a pair of white “clothing”. Somehow my brother knew that they were tachrichim. He went into his room, put on the tachrichim and lied down in his bed. Then he heard TICK TICK TICK TICK TICK…He woke up and heard TICK TICK TICK…
It happened to be that someone put a clock into his room that day! Any meaning to this?!
This thread MUST be woken up.
Do not leave your children alone in the car, even if you’re just running in for a “minute”, your car will literally roast & suffocate the children, and this can happen faster then you think. Even if you leave the ac on and the doors locked, cars are unpredictable and can stop working properly, even new expensive ones.
It is not even summer yet, and I already heard about three or four people leaving their children in the car.
We got to be more careful!
2) provide glasses, eye exams, eye care, (eye operations?) for kids, adults with challenges
is Tzeddaka
And about the music, maybe you can find a sick child who would benefit from playing an instrument. I think that would fall into Tzeddaka. Music has the power to heal!
Wolf, a minhag is only “Torah hu” for those who follow that minhag. If you don’t follow that minhag, then you are “patur”. But if you take upon yourself this really holy minhag of eating cheesecake on Shavous, then really amazing things will happen to you.
Like a stomachache…
Imanonov, those were very good! Thanks!!!
Dr. Pepper, I was referring to What Is So Rare…, not When was that?.
9) A key automobile component. Enjun
Yes, my mother figured it out, but said its not a fair one!
ICOT, I gave a paper with the “What Is So Rare…” questions to my Mother, and within 10 minutes she got all the answers.
(She said 9 wasn’t so fair!)
The song Someday from MBD, pepole don’t seem to know all the words. The high parts are very well known, however, the low parts, especially the second half people sing all different things.
Not only that, but many times I found Someday written down with a lot of mistakes. (PS: I am not looking for the lyrics)
There are 1 or fewer people in the U.S. named EDITED – d a.
The estimates for one or both names are not absolute. There may be fewer people with this name, or none at all.
This happens not to be true, because there are at least two other people with my name living in the U.S. …
Anybody following the trial? Some updates anyone?
Why don’t bakeries make doughnuts all year long? I see that they make Hamantaschen all the time, but no doughnuts. Doughnuts are 500 times better then Hamantaschen, and thats a FACT! And doughnuts are an ordinary all year snack. Hamantaschen are for Purim!
Mods, having fun?
postsemgirl, where are the words from?
Thanks ICOT, you got a good memory!
By the way, cb1, my comment above was just a joke.
NYC Department of Corrections
Name: Samantha Cohn
Function: Nurse
DOB: 1980-09-11
NYSID: 08467118M
Book&Case #: 2410710654
Facility: North Infirmary Command
Discharge Date: 2010-05-19
Next Court Date: 2010-06-04
Bail and Bond: remanded
Mods shouldn’t be posting personal info of other people, no?
Everyone needs encouragement. Children. Teens. Adults.
cb1, next time try: “Its a matter of opinion, and your opinion doesn’t matter”!
Guys, don’t get me wrong. I love Boruch Levine and his music.
cb1, your doubting me? Of course I’m always right!
A cop pulls up to the scene of a crash. He sees a car smashed into a tree. Running to the driver, he asks, “Are you badly injured?” The man replied, “I don’t know. I’m not a lawyer!”
rosh chabura
it is just that you never find a singer that composes his own music
Abie Rotenberg composed many songs that he sang. Look at Journeys. Almost all the songs Abie sings.
Also, that is how the music industry works. Not all composers are singers. Hashem gave Boruch Levine many talents. One is to compose, one is to sing and one is to teach. Each one can work without the other. If he would not be a composer, would you say his singing is not excellent and inspiring?
Hold on mods. The computer that I use is a public computer in an office.
“You already have a number It is 3” Please don’t jump to conclusions.
Why the ambiguity?
rosh chabura, Boruch Levine is an awesome composer and singer. This does not mean that no one else is good. People have different tastes and like different things.
Does being a Rebbe of Yiddieshe Kinderlach make a person a better composer/singer?
Every person has his/her job in life. Shwekey does his thing. Gabay does his. And Levine does his. He may be a excellent Rebbe, but that doesn’t make him a better person then the next guy.
We are not judging people here, the thread is called Most Heartfelt Jewish Song In Your View. Most Heartfelt Jewish Song In Your View. Every person has their own VIEW.
And by the way, is Boruch Levine your cousin or something? Three posts praising him…
There are bands that now call themselves “Safe Music Providers” and lower the volume. I was by a Chasuna with one of these SMPs.
You know how he was a SMP? He put his speakers all the way on the other side of the hall, away from the ladies, and played at the same (loud) volume.
It happens to be, by that Chasuna, the older men were accidentally put right in front of the band;. Oops.
By the way people, if you search your name and surround it by “quotes”, you will probably find your name on the first page.
What ever happened with avraham rosenthal?
mischiefmaker, agree 100%
cb1, you probably just searched yourself so that you can post here! Just kidding!!
Yes I did. Didn’t find much (luckily!)
It seems like all threads are saying that there is 1 more post then there actually is.
Whatever.
And our Faithful Leader, Sir Barack Hussein Obama will be visiting Chicago on this Holiday. Not honoring our troops. Well, why should he? There nothing but baby killers?
Mr. Illegal President, enjoy your vacation with all your America-hating, communist, ultra-liberal friends in Chicago.
why, when one starts a new thread, it says there are 2 Posts already posted in that thread when there is really only 1?
RagachoversAssistant, let us know how your tour goes at the end of the summer!!!
Chadyasfun Yisroel (I have no idea how to spell that one!) is a very touching song. Hashem’s love of Klal Yisroel. Wanting us to return to him. Beautiful tune. Inspiring words.
One thing we must keep in mind, a Jewish song of any kind, is only precious if and when, it brings us closer to Hashem. Abie, you couldn’t of said it better! There’s nothing like a Niggun, it’s music for your soul.
HIE, what happened? They changed your name?!
Sorry for letting the thread slide. People don’t seem to be interested`in this thread.
THE LIST:
1 HIE
2 smartcookie
3 d a
4 oomis
5 mybat
6 aimhabonim
7 FunnyBunny
8 sm29
9 haifagirl
10 estherh
11 volvie
12 BEST IMA
13 Bodek
14 ronrsr
15 speaktruth
16 aries2756
17 boredjewishguy
18 fan of pd
19 kollelboy123
20 goody613
21 WolfishMusings
22 asdfghjkl
23 Moderator-42
24 RoshYeshiva
25 boredstiff
26 BP Totty
27 RN2B
28 Moderator-99
29 nnnnnn
30 tomim tihye
31 not2bright
32 The Rabbi Rocks
33 amichai
34 hodulashem
35 kapusta
36 the.nurse
37 areivimzehlazeh
38 checkmate 27
39 Moderator-77
40 rdreyfuss
41 ishman
42 simchallthetime
43 h2
44 tums
45 shtarkbocher
46 vas1820
47 RaisedEyebrow
48 GARBAGE
49 mstrram
50 shtieging
51 Dovv
52 abbazabba123
53 lakewoodwife
54 mischiefmaker
55 YW Moderator-55
56 chofetzchaim
57 Chops
58 Noach
59 moishy
60 SJSinNYC
61 postsemgirl
62 bombmaniac
63 jewish girl
64 Smile_its_EZ
65 Y.S.G.F.K.
66 potpie
67 noitallmr
68 steiny-is-a-bit-fast
69 JewBachur
70 bein_hasdorim
71 cb1
72 Moderator-72
73 HaLeiVi
74 shkoyach
75 Peerimsameach – big y
76 Peerimsameach – littlr y
77 Peerimsameach – M
78 Peerimsameach – a
79 Peerimsameach – s
80 Peerimsameach – pinny
81 blinky
82 __________________________
Imanonov, they are very good. But the President one could work for the first Jewish President (male or female), no?
I forgot to say that there is a Shul on the campgrounds, a Shul down the road (about a 10 minute walk) and a Shul in Woodridge (about a 15 minute walk).
Also in Woodridge, ther are many stores including Buy Rite and Pizza.
Imanonov, you made me laugh! Thanks!