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Flatbusher…
actually I was pointing out what does not appeal to me about living in 2017 Brooklyn. That is different than focusing on negatives. When I was 20 and single, I loved living on Ocean Parkway in the midst of the hustle and bustle with frum people and shops all around. It’s now what I want in this stage of life.
Meno…….
This is a family favorite
any kind of ground meat that has been sauteed first works. You can vary the spices, but the envelopes of onion soup mix are very easy to use.
lilmod…………
Our direct line, yes. I can’t say the same for all the assorted relations, many did, but others practice American forms of ‘Judaism’ as well.
My grandmother used to feed a group of bochurim Shabbos lunch once a month in 1970s Brooklyn.
She found that if she made a fleischige luckshen kugel (using 5 bags of noodles, eggs, 2 lbs of sauteed ground beef all mixed with 2 envelopes of onion soup mix, a quart of water and then baked) it was appreciated served at room temperature, quite filling and different from what most hosts served. The bochurim often would specifically ask for it
iacisrmma…………..
we are an old time Litvak Misnagid family who arrived here in 1868 from Sapotskin (now in Belarus). Merchants in Europe, merchants and professionals in the USA. We have attended and supported a good number of Yeshivos, but are very comfortable with the Brisk traditions.
Flatbusher…
It wasn’t about the guests caring.
Re: Flowers
The colors for the wedding were Red and White. A specific dance had been arranged where female guests would take the flower that matched the color of their napkin and shower the Kallah with the flowers while waving the napkins. If there were 10 seats at a table and the florist only placed 8 flowers some guests could not participate.
As for the Canadian Whiskey…it was about me. The men in my family have been Canadian Club drinkers since the 1930s. We drink our whiskey straight up. I personally detest the taste of VO. I was paying for the chasanah and should be entitled to drink the whiskey of my choice (as was specified in the contract).
When I got married some 45 years ago the contract specifically called for Diet Coke to be available at the bar, as my BIL had diabetes and this was his drink of choice. During the schmorg we found there was no Diet Coke. The caterer was made to send someone to the store to buy a case. BTW, my BIL, the Rav was the Mesader Kedushin and deserved to have what he could drink.
WTP
If the father is a contract employee of the synagogue there is nothing to inherent. Personal services contracts dies with the person. In fact it is quite common for the rabbi’s employment contract to have a set term. The synagogue is not forced to renew the contract unless life tenure has been granted.
This is far different than shtieblach that may operate in the home of the rabbi. There the son may well take over, but congregants are free to leave and not support the son.
Scraped
Rapidly
iacismma…….
The Wedding Coordinator was our eldest daughter in law. She was the authorized person from whom the caterer, photographer, florist and other vendors had to take instructions.
This didn’t cost money, it required a competent and dedicated person willing to make sure that our wishes were followed.
For example, the centerpieces on the tables were supposed to have equal numbers of red and white roses (equal to the total number of seats at each table). DIL found the florist simply placed centerpieces with 8 roses on each table. This was not as contracted and the florist had to return to his shop and come back with the correct additional flowers and fix the centerpieces before guests arrived. She also noticed that the caterer did not have the specific brand of Canadian Whiskey we ordered at the bars. The caterer was reminded of the contract obligation and sent to the warehouse for the correct items.
These were important enough items to be noted in contracts, but not important enough for Mrs. CTL or new in-law to deal with during a chasanah..that’s why we designated a wedding coordinator.
Lilmod
“If you don’t like it, home school or send to private school.”
I don’t know if it’s reasonable to expect someone to home school their child because the public school is acting against freedom of religion. It’s not necessarily a realistic option for everyone.”
Please don’t judge other countries by what is in the US Constitution. Freedom of Religion is not a constitutional right in most countries of the world. Even enlightened countries such as England, have an official state church and the monarch is the titular head.
iacisrmma…………..
It’s all about making choices and what is important to you.
I don’t have to travel to NY to buy meat, I can simply phone in a large order and have it delivered from NY. I don’t have to worry about shopping on the Avenue a couple of times each week, because my apartment only has room for a 14 cubic foot refrigerator with a small freezer section. We have loads of space. My chametz kitchen is bigger than the one bedroom apartment I had on Ocean Parkway as a young single in 1970. I have additional refrigeration and freezer space in our garage, butler’s pantry and basement. Our Pesach kitchen is 20×20 with its own storage as well, I couldn’t afford to have all this space in Brooklyn (5700 sq ft 17 room house and a separate garage building with a studio apartment above). It is no effort to host all the children, in-laws, grandchildren for the holidays in comfortable accommodations at the CTL resort. We B”H own our own Sifrei Torah and host on premises minyan for Yuntif when the family is here. No need to worry about public swimming, as we can set the hours for separate swimming in our pool, hot tub, as well as use out sports courts. We own the house for taxes and utilities. Taxes are about $1500 per month..I couldn’t rent a decent 1 bedroom apartment for that in Brooklyn. So, if I spend extra for food being brought in, or to have sent kids to yeshiva away from home, fine. I never had a bill for sleep away camp, who needed to leave our compound? Mrs. CTL’s mother lives next door, SIL and family 4 doors away.
and none of this lifestyle precludes me being a baal tzedaka, who attends minyan every morning, runs a law firm and learns each day. 4 children married off and 1 to go…all married frum despite being raised in the desert,
iacisrmma……….
We married off a daughter just before Pesach. We set all these details down ion the contract with the caterer including the fact that he’d take direction from our wedding coordinator. We would not allow the caterer to be in a position to dictate to us on the day opf the simcha. You can be sure that if the caterer violated the terms of the contrat drawn up by this attorney he would not have rec’d a check at the end of the evening, but an invitation to a beis din.
Discussing in advance is nice, but you need to get it reduced to writing in the actual contract.
iacisrmma…………..
sorry, I was in the kosher catering business (decades ago). The caterer is not in charge. It is the caterer’s job to cater to the wishes and desires of the paying customer. The bride, her family or their paid wedding planner/coordinator goes through a schedule in advance with the caterer and sets time and events. No caterer has any business telling a chosson and kallah what time they MUST make their entrance.
My only take on this is that some people who purchase a ‘Wedding Package’ at a supposedly reduced price are told there are no variations accepted…you are contracting for the package as it exists…you get what you pay for.
Flatbusher
I have lived in small Jewish Communities and I have lived in Brooklyn.
There is much that Brooklyn offers that is of no interest to me: congestion,subways, buses, pollution, close living (no having multiple acres lots with woods, room for a private and secluded pool) impossible (or expensive) parking. NOISE, high NYC property taxes, HIGH NYS and NYC income and sales taxes, everyone in your space and minding your business.
I am more than happy to drive 90-120 minutes to occasionally dine, shop or see relatives in Brooklyn, but I would not want to live there and didn’t want to raise a family there.
BTW>>>I do not care about pizza shops and takeout prepared food places. We are more than happy to cook our meals without those overpriced conveniences, plus I wouldn’t want my children or grandchildren hanging out at the pizza shop.
I don’t consider my suburban home to be in the desert, rather an oasis.
We married off a daughter last spring.
One photographer.
40 minutes after the Chuppah for family pictures. No pictures of each table, only candids. He was told to use only natural light and be unobtrusive.
NO video
and none of this was about cost. we ordered only what we wanted.
request
tripods
huju…………..
he has one. In 45 years of business his non-collected receivables have amounted to less than 1/20 of 1%.
The only 2 large amounts were Trump and McMahon.
younger
resolve
huju……….
wisdom of the aged……….LOL
meshuga
academy
lightbrite>>>>>>>>>>>>>
I keep posting that I do NOT do criminal work. So, the answer is NO. There is no such thing as prosecution in civil trials. The plaintiff (party bringing the suit) and defendant (party being sued) are not prosecutors.
The loser doesn’t go to jail/prison or face fines, and can’t be found guilty
lightbrite………..
I’m old. I remember prutot coins before the aluminum Agurot. Nevr ming grush.
My first lengthy stay in EY that I remember was in 1960, 12 week summer holiday staying with my aunt and uncle so the cousins could get to know each other.
AviK
Lawyers are on juries often in CT. The problem is that some lawyers will tell other jurors their understanding of the law instead of adhering to the judge’s charge to the jury. That said, most lawyers will abide by the rules of impartiality and follow the judge’s jury instructions to the letter.
I don’t do criminal work, but have no problem with lawyers serving on juries in civil cases I’m involved with. I like highly educated jurors far more than those with minimal education who can’t really understand the testimony, exhibits and judge’s charge.
iacirsmma…….
On a typical day, 300 potential jurors are called to appear in Bridgeport Superior Court (CT trial level court). About 220 will actually get called down to courtrooms to interviewed for juries. At 2PM those who have not been sent to courtrooms for questioning are dismissed and sent home. They can’t be called again for 3 years.
I( have been called for state jury service 4 times in the past 13 years. I was excused twice, one time I was sent home as there were far more jurors available than needed to staff scheduled trials. The 4th time I was selected for a jury sitting in a criminal case. After the state put on its case the defendant changed his plea to guilty and cut a deal.
Joseph……….
Judge A in State Court dismissed the attorney with a scheduled court date in Federal Court, because Judge A knows the Federal Judge B can send a US Marshal to take attorney into custody and deliver him to Federal Court bfor the scheduled trial.
Rank has its privilege and in the pecking order a Federal Judge is higher than a State Trial Court Judge.
BTW>>>>I have seen businessmen excused because of scheduling conflicts that involve numbers of people and large expenses. Last year, a trial judge moved the start date of a trial back 2 days so a juror could finish a business seminar (for which many tickets had been sold). In my experience, judges in smaller states tend to be more accommodating than in NY (I don’t practice there, but am admitted to the NYS Bar).
Lightbrite
“The issue is that when this ship is at sea, it discharges all their waste into the ocean without restrictions. It’s far enough away from land to disregard any legislative concern for the environment, and so it does.”
When it returns to port and has no waste to be offloaded for legal disposal the captain may find himself under arrest, the shipowner fined and the ship possibly seized.
There are international treaties, laws and agreements for dealing with waste disposal at sea. When a ship docks, the sewage holding tanks are emptied via sewer connections or into tanker trucks. Solid waste is carted away by commercial haulers and disposed of in a legally permitted manner.
Lightbrite………
The size of a jury varies.
In CT criminal juries are 12 people plus 2-3 alternates. The longer the case is supposed to take to try then the more likely there will be 3 alternates.
Civil case juries are composed of 6 people plus 1-2 alternates.
Favoring someone with the same last name.
Here in CT, with the exception of Probate Judges, we do NOT elect judges they are appointed. The vetting process eliminates those who would have a predilection for bias.
As for arranging for better treatment in prison. Wardens don’t take orders from trial judges. The Corrections Department is part of the Executive Branch, not Judicial.
Joseph………..
Jurisdictions have different rules. Here in CT Courts, and the Federal Courts as well, the judge is on the bench when the prospective jury panel is brought in. He introduces the case, him/herself, the attorneys, names of plaintiff, defendant, major witnesses and asks if any are known to the prospective jurors. If any raises a hand to say yes, the judge questions the juror candidate to determine whether it is a problem. The judge then lays out the timing of the trial: when it will begin, approximately how many days it will take, whether it might require sequestration. Again if any juror candidate raises a hand stating a conflict, the judges questions and makes a determination. Only then do the attorneys start the voir dire process. The judge often asks questions as well.
Last year, I was called for jury duty. When my group was called before the judge, I did not know the Judge (it was her first case in this district) or attorneys (all were from out of state representing the two corporations in a civil suit). However the judge announced that the trial would start on Tuesday and take three days. I raised my hand to indicate a conflict. The judge asked why and I explained that I was representing a client in a case starting Wednesday in US District Court starting Wednesday. I was immediately excused. It is far easier to get another juror than reschedule a Federal case.
Zahavasdad
“Why would a lawyer want someone on a case who clearly doesnt want to be there?
Arent there dismissals where both lawyers agree and it doesnt count against your juror challenges?”
#1 The person who doesn’t want to be there may still give an impartial and fair hearing of the evidence and follow the judge’s charge to the jury.
#1a that person may have some education that will benefit the jury in deliberations. E.G. an engineer may be able to explain tolerances, etc in a product liability action
#2 It doesn’t matter if both lawyers agree to keep a juror off, if the juror is not excused for cause by the judge (in response to the lawyer’s request and reasoning) then the potential juror must be left out by a peremptory challenge…charged against the lawyer requesting it. Otherwise, 2 lawyers could decide between themselves to eliminate all Blacks, Jews, Women, etc,
Joseph……..
“A jury is charged with determining the guilt of the defendant.”
ONLY in criminal trials.
As an attorney I often deal with juries, BUT I don’t do criminal work. The juries in a civil trial determine whether a plaintiff has proven his/her case and is entitled to damages to be made whole. Guilt is not part of the process.
Nisayon
Necktie
Yehudayona…………
The American Queen Co is the latest reincarnation of the old Delta Queen Co. It has closed down and gone bankrupt repeated times under different ownership. Their biggest problem is that their main boat doesn’t meet current Safety requirements and gets temporary certificates to operate.
Since they have cancelled their seasons so often in the past 10 years I didn’t bother to mention them.
The New England owned lines (who operate throughout the US, Canada and Carribean) American Cruise Lines and Blount Small Ship Adventures. Neither can accommodate kosher guests and special meal prep.
Zahavasdad………….
Not all Cruise lines offer airline style kosher food, many do so but not from all ports. Imagine the horror of showing up for your first meal after the ship has left port and finding out the kosher food didn’t make it…it’s not like a flight that lets you off in less than 24 hours.
There are two River cruise companies in the USA, but they do not offer kosher food options, as they cook and serve family style. We happen to be friends with the owners of both lines, one is based in CT and the other in RI.
AviK
I am familiar with the Minnesota case In Re Jenison. That deals with a juror claiming exemption from jury duty due to religious beliefs. It does NOT create an exemption for Clergy.
Nice try, but muddling the waters by posting items that are not on point doesn’t make you correct.
There is no such thing in NY or CT as a Clergy Exemption.
Avi….
your use of the word probably is meaningless. If there is NO clergy exemption, then it cannot be granted. A judge may let someone off jury duty, but he can’t make up an exemption that doesn’t exist.
BTW>>>>>if a judge was found to be regularly excusing clergy because of their occupation he would be brought up on disciplinary charges before the chief administrative judge. Judicial discretion is not judicial abuse of the system.
Clergy are no better than other citizens and if called upon to serve they should do so.
If there were a clergy exmption, then every Tom, Dick and Harry would buy a $10 ordination on the internet to avoid jury duty.
Joseph…..
No not like bingo. In many ways similar to Rummy card games. There are suits such as Bamboo, Dot, Crack, wild cards. etc. You use the tiles to make specific hands of melds so many of a number and color…
Eli51…..
28YO daughter works in the private luxury Yachting industry. For only $475,000 per week you can charter her Yacht. It sleeps 10 guests. They only charge $10,000 extra per day for kosher food and wine/liquor
BYLiberal…
It’s not as easy as you think. We attorneys and the judges know the typical answers people use to get out of jury duty. Attorneys can only dismiss so many potential jurors out of hand and won’t waste these challenges on someone with made up smart answers.
Many of us employ jury consultants and know more about potential jurors than you can imagine.
Many a potential juror attempting to lie has been confronted with the jury questionnaire that may have been filled out months earlier. Getting caught lying during the proceeding and subject you to criminal penalties.
If youy wish to live in the USA then you have obligations as a citizen and that includes jury duty.
In China this is generally played by men. In the 1920s and 30s it swept the NY Tenement buildings and was taken up by Jewish women.
My grandmothers both played several times per week. My mother played in a weekly game until she was 90. My MIL still has a Monday game.
My wife does not play, but both younger daughters have learned the game and play occasionally.
My maternal grandmother referred to the game as ‘idiot’s delight’
It is gambling for low stakes (typically $5 maximum loss for the entire afternoon or evening). It became popular as it gave housewives a chance to spend a few hours with other adults and not children or housework.
There is a National Mah Jongg League who prints the annual rules and lists of possible winning hands and payouts. They donate a large percentage of the sale of the cards to Jewish charities in the uS and Israel.
Avi K
Rules vary by jurisdiction, so please do not give blanket advice that is not true in all states.
There is no such thing as a ‘clergy exemption’ in Connecticut. Clergy are called and serve. In fact, lawyers are not exempt. That said, every time I’ve been called and subjected to the questioning the first questions is always: Do you know any of the attorneys, prosecutors or judges involved in this case?
Living in a small state, The chances are that I do and I am excused for cause.
The only ones exempt in CT are those over 70, the Constitutional office holders of the state, members of the State Legislature while it is in session, felons convicted within 7 years (not in prison), those who can not understand English and sitting Judges. All others must make an appearance or file a medical or other excuse and await a ruling.
My college daughter was called to serve in February while she’ll be at college in NY. She was given the opportunity to go on line and choose another date within 10 months.
lightbrite………
Please allow me to correct a misconception you have about people who eat or keep ‘kosher’.
Many of these people are not ‘frum’ but we we call Euro-traditional or Conservative. They may book a kosher cruise because it’s a family vacation and bubbe only eats kosher food. But the children and grandchildren will be partaking of all the regular ship activities, not attending shiurim or Jewish Music evening entertainments. Bubbe, herself may be happy with kosher food, but be the first in line for a nighclub show with scantily clad showgirls and also head for the casino.
I live in a small town. There are probably 100 homes with ‘kosher’ kitchens, but probably only one dozen of the families are ‘frum.’ BUT, without the support of the other 88% kosher butchers and bakers would not be in business. The same goes for kosher cruises, summer camps and even kosher kitchens at universities and colleges. A ‘kosher’ cruise does not guaranty a ‘kosher’ crowd.
Joseph……yes it is worse on a cruise.
Years ago, cruises were more formal. Passengers would either change for the swimming pool in locker rooms adjoining the pool or wear full robes when going from the cabin to the pool. Now, passengers will walk the gangways in their bathingsuits with a towel thrown on their shoulders…totally inappropriate. Mrs. CTL and I stopped cruising in the early 90s because of this. Never mind, the tank tops and short shorts now allowed in the dining rooms.
We started cruising back in the 70s when the QE2 had a full kosher kitchen and there was an acceptable dress code on board. PLUS there were no electronic room keys. Nowadays, we can’t handle 14 deck ships that are 3 football fields long and call a Shabbos navigating that enjoyable
tiny edit
Health….
My hatred for Trump has nothing to do with Israel.
He beat my brother for almost $400K on an equipment purchase and installation in one of his properties. Now he has appointed a CT woman to be head of the SBA. This woman went bankrupt (Trump style) costing brother $290K on telephone system installation in her Stamford business HQ.
The hatred is personal. I had to step in and pay tuition and for a niece’s wedding because of these dishonorable people
iacrisma…
I was looking at the monthly premium increase from a base of $1250 increasing by about $255. Your $3320 is $276.66 per month
Abba_S
My daughter has ZERO intention of living in Australia after marriage. The only boys under consideration are interested in moving to and living in the USA.
If there was to be an engagement, the boy and parents would be coming here to meet us. Wedding would be here.
They sell travel health insurance policies…she has one now.
Abba_S
You are so wrong……………….
What mommy wants, mommy gets. Mommy made the contact with the shadchan.
We have never pressured our children to marry early. We prefer they finish college and professional school first. Our daughter who married this past April finished law school in December, took and passed the February Bar exam and married before Pesach.
After Pesach, Mrs. CTL had life threatening medical issues. She spent 23 days on life support in ICU and has had 10 surgeries since. Her entire attitude about seeing our youngest married soon has changed. Our youngest has agreed to enter the shidduch process because she wants to marry while Mrs. CTL is well enough to take part in planning and the simcha.
Daddy has stayed out of this decision…all he’ll do is write the checks and be supportive of daughter’s decision.
Personally, I’d rather she marry an American, she’s 6th generation and I rather not see her consider moving down under.
Winnie……
I wasn’t insulted.
I have Teflon shoulders, nothing flung at me sticks.
I believe in the concept of the citizen legislator, not career politicians feeding at the public trough.
Here in CT our state legislators are part time and are paid only $28,000 per year. They depend on other jobs/professions to support themselves, not government.
I serve on my Town Council. Not only are we not paid, but we are not reimbursed for out of pocket expenses such as office supplies.
Last election cycle, I spent less than $100 my campaign. I stopped at or called more than 5000 households in my council district. ???? ???? works wonders…people toss campaign mailers directly in the trash.
Nechomah………….
When you live OOT and are traveling a great distance and at a great cost to another area it makes sense to line up multiple shidduch opportunities.
It’s not like you can easily return in a week or two to meet someone else.
In fact, Mrs. CTL did not ask the shadchan for multiple dates for our daughter. The shadchan suggested 4 possibilities to meet during our daughter’s stay down under.
As for dating one person on Thursday and another on Friday>>>>back in the early 1970s when I was dating, it was not unusual for a boy to have one date Sunday afternoon and another Sunday night.
Abba_S
I just dropped youngest daughter at JFK. She’s off to Australia for 4 week vacation during college winter break. 4 shidduch dates have been arranged during the first 10 days. This leaves time for additional dates if she finds one a ‘possible.’
She told us she told us she was going to visit former camp friends and Mrs. CTL put the shidduch process in motion.
Moshe from Midwood…
Midwood is in NY. Is your relative also in NY???? The state website says “The weighted average rate increase for the individual market in New York is 16.6 percent for 2017.” So the premium increase should have been about $275 not $500.
I am very specific about having ACA coverage through the CONNECTICUT Health Care Exchange.
I am not an Obama lover, I am a Trump hater.