Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
Unfortunately, marrying a close relative greatly raises the chance of offspring with mental and/or physical defects.
The one who arranges ‘dispensation’ to travel by automobile or jet plane on Shabbos
Joseph………………..
There are many reasons why this may occur in some families. it leaves the mother free to attend to the needs of small children in the car.
I think that you will find this more common in ONE car families.
Those living OOT or the suburbs where the norm is that there is a car for each driver, may fit the CTL family pattern. If we are in Reb CTL’s vehicle, I drive. If we are in Mrs. CTL’s vehicle she drives. This past Thursday, last single Miss CTL asked me to to the shopping mall with her. It was a 90 degree, sunny day. We went in her convertible with the top down, she drove, I was the passenger.
BTW>>>she told me that as she is getting married this summer she wants to enjoy the feeling of the sun and wind in her hair while she can. She’ll be trading in the convertible for a married lady’s car suitable for hauling groceries, etc. before the chasunah this summer.MOST of the divorce cases I’ve handled in the past 40 or so years have been couples who married as teenagers and then grew up and apart.
Both Jews and Gentiles, Religious and nonYou can not work with a megalomaniac. He only gives orders.
The sooner he is forced from office, the better off this country will be.
His entire administration including the freeloading family members and in-laws have to go….possibly to prison55 years ago the cook at our day school was one of those moms. She worked the same hours her children were in school at the same location in exchange for tuition.
Politics is not bad, but some politicians are
The change actually started in the mid 1960s when busing to achieve racial balance started. Prior to that kids walked home for lunch from neighborhood elementary schools. Only the junior and senior high schools had cafeterias that served hot lunches. The neighborhood schools did not have commercial kitchens, so prepacked lunches in disposable individual containers came on a truck each day from the central commissary. in rolling warming units, that could be plugged in to stay hot and all they needed in the grade schools was a refrigerator for the milk and folding tables with benched to set up in the gym.
By 1980 all new schools were constructed with kitchens for heating and serving. They had warming ovens and refrigerators. NO stove-tops, no pots and pans, no serving utensils, NO dishwashers and NO cooks
This system is far less expensive than cooking on site in terms of equipment cost and personnel. A 4 hour a day lunchroom lady costs about $10 per hour and gets no benefits working 19 hours per week. A cook would be paid about $22 plus benefits..add in the cost of equipment and utilities and the price of lunch would be prohibitive.
Our town uses this system. They sell the complete Type A hot lunch (Main, starch, fruit, veg and milk or juice) for $3 (breaking even). If they went back to the old ways, cost analysis (assuming a 25 year life to equipment) shows they would have to charge $4.75 to break even.Our local day school changed from cooking on site to having a local kosher caterer (who also supplies meals on wheels and runs the kitchens at the Home for the Elderly) run the program back about 1995. It also was a huge cost savings. A professional operation turning out 3000 meals a day was far more efficient than a single cook in the day school kitchen. We also got nutritionally balanced meals for the kids. No more twice a week fried matzo with powered bug juice from after Pesach through June.
Chochom……………..
Trump is NOT my President, he is the country’s President.
I don’t have to root for him to fail, he is a failure.
I’m desirous that he depart, I’m tired of that laughing stock embarrassing us.RebYidd23………………..
This country didn’t exist 600 years ago.
It is only about 400 years since European colonization started. The ‘country’ is only 240 years old.I don’t believe the country was better off when it was a group of colonies ruled by European monarchs with established state religions, slavery, etc.
“Are life insurance companies non-profits, with their clients the primary intended beneficiaries of their company?”
They are if they are “MUTUAL” insurance companies which are owned by the policy holders.
In Connecticut we also have Mutual Savings Banks, owned by the depositors.This isn’t 80 years ago and no one is asking for advice for their grandparents or great grandparents,
Everyone was NOT married at 18 back then.
My parents were married 79 years ago, he was 22, she was 21 .
My paternal grandparents were married in 1919, he was 24, she was 20>>>they waited until he returned from the US army, drafted to serve in WWI
My maternal grandparents were married in 1920, he was 24, she was 20>>>they waited until he finished medical school.All of these marriages took place in NYC, all of these people were born in NY.
The last marriage in our family that had a chasan or kallah 18 years or less occurred in 1856 in Suwalki…they left for America in 1872.In our public school district they use 90% chocolate 10% White milk.
Our biggest problem is that food is packaged at the central commissary, sent to the schools in individual serving plastic trays with polyfilm and heated at the schools. Thus a 3 year old in Pre-K and a high school senior all get the same size lunch portion. The little kids can’t finish and the teens are hungry.
Back when food was actually cooked in each school and ladeled out as the kids went through the line, the cafeteria ladies could adjust the size of the portion by age and appetite. A first grader might get 2 fishsticks and a 8th grader 5. No more.Syag…………….
Under the pre-trump federal school lunch guidelines the white milk is NOT fat free, it is Low Fat (1%). The flavored milk (Chocolate and Strawberry) are fat free. The Trump administration will allow the flavored milks to also be Low Fat.
However, this won’t be changed in school districts until they bid new milk contracts for future school years. Our local public school system is only in year one of a three year contract, so no change until September 2019.It’s interesting that you can take and redistribute food from a school lunch program. This is illegal in many localities. The full lunch MUST be served to every student and once served, even if the container is not open it can not be recycled. I have watched the cafeteria ladies take as many as 100 milk cartons at a time from the tables they clear and open them and pour the milk down the drain.
The workers are told that if they are caught removing any leftover items from the premises they are subject to immediate dismissal.One of the requirements for non-profits to receive free USDA surplus food is that the food may only be used for the specific program. Our local health codes don’t allow the food to go elsewhere for later feedings because there is no way to certify handling (temperature, etc.) and the school that prepared it would have a liability if someone got ill.
I could go on and on, because I just chaired a committee of our Town Council dealing with food costs and handling in the public schools.
Impeachment is not enough. The Senate must also convict him.
Wrong you are……………
NOT a cosmetic change, but an AMENDMENT extending equal rights to women. No need to write an additional amendment when amended existing language confers equal rights on women,An amendment is a change to the document. Some states require a new section,others such as Ny allow changes to language.
The fire was a tragedy in 1911. 146 people died, mostly of Jewish and Italian heritage. 146 people is not the vast majority of immigrants.
The level of observance varied in the immigrant community, just as it varies in America today.
Most pre 1924 Jewish immigrants to America were ‘Euro-Traditional observant, not what we call Frum today. Today’s Frum American Jew has a much better Torah education than those raised at the turn of the 20th Century in the US. Most US Torah institutions were in their infancy at that time. Many had only a rudimentary Jewish education in the old country (or in America) they observed rituals in conformity with the community standards. Because they were no longer forced to live in a designated ghetto, shetl, Pale of Settlement, they often made choices to change their level of adherence to halacha.Socio-economic background does not mean just money. It includes things such as education, how long in a country, shared beliefs and interests.
I’d rather have a Pletzel than a pretzel
Correct? NO
I’m saying that people with the same or similar backgrounds are likely to have similar outlook on how life should be lived and less conflicts.Class and income are not the same thing. I’ve met many a wealthy person who is low class and many a poor person who is refined and well bred.
No one is talking about 60-80 years ago, we are speaking about current times and the baal batim who build and support our Torah institutions in the late 20th and 21st century CE.
Your comments about the majority of Frum Jews in Europe is laughable because the VAST MAJORITY were barred from higher education by anti-Jew laws.
My paternal side came to the USA in 1872 from the Litivish Heim, my maternal side in 1868 from Bavaria. They were restricted by law to certain trades and barred from the Universities in most cases. By 1880 my great grandfathers were in University in the US. ALL my grandparents attended university in the nineteen teens. The men went on to get medical and legal degrees. The women got degrees in education and licenses.
I grew up on a block of 6 single family houses built in 1951. All were occupied by Frum families. All 6 husbands owned their own businesses, 5 had college degrees. The sixth was trained in electronics by the US Army during WWII and he owned and operated a chain of TV/Appliance stores (his children all went on to college and professional school after yeshiva. 5 of the women has college degrees, in fact my mother had a doctorate in child psychology and was a school principal. The 6th woman was a registered nurse. In those days it was a 3 year post high school program, but offered no Bachelor’s degree.
There were 35 children in those 6 families. We went to day schools, yeshiva high schools of Chabad girls high schools (there was one in town). Every single one of us went on to college and more than 20 to graduate school. Not one married before college graduation. Some like my eldest sister graduated college in May and married the week after Shavous.
Now we are all grandparents, we didn’t let our children marry until they had a proper education and could make their own way in the world. Even my Brother-in-Law, who grew up 2 doors from us and went to Torah Vadaath, also completed a college degree before my father would allow him to marry mys sister. He went on to spend 40 years as a pulpit rabbi, finishing 2 advanced degrees while working.Back in Europe, you might have been able to find the odd Frum medical doctor, but the open opportunity for higher education was closed to Frum Jews.
It is a suggestion that people of similar backgrounds have a better chance at a successful and happy long term marriage.
Joseph……………….
you have no scientific type data to back up your claim and such a study was ner performed by a group such as the Pew Report.OOT is a different world. If I look at the communities I’ve lived in, the Stharkers (baal batim) who built and funded the synagogues, day schools, yeshivos going back to my parents’ generation (born 1920 in the US) were men who married after completing their college educations and starting in the work force. Some, like my father, married during WWII and after being disccharged form the armed forces started career and family in 1946.
The vast majority of the pre 1924 Jewish immigrants to the US wanted to live the American dream in harmony with Jewish Observance. That meant college education (my parents like many at CCNY and Hunter) then marriage, jobs, children.
The Kollel phenomenon and early marriage while being supported by parents and in-laws only became common with the arrival of post WWII immigrants and those escaping the Hungarian Revolution.We both can ONLY present anecdotal evidence on this issue, but I dispute your claim of ‘vast majority.’
A photo reveals much more than beauty. It may reveal things such as eyesight (coke bottle eyeglasses), clues to economic status (cheap suit?), hygiene (teeth and hair), religious sect (type of hat), etc.
Just saw this old thread brought to life and had to make some comments.
My paternal great grandparents moved to Boro Park in 1903.
Both my grandfather and father celebrated their Bar Mitzvah at the Temple Beth El in 1913 and 1935 respectively.
In postwar II America the use of the word ‘Temple’ and a synagogue name usually indicated this was a Reform synagogue, but that was not a universal truth. Here in New England ‘Temple’ XXXX was the name of many Orthodox shuls founded after the Russian pogroms of 1881 and the change of immigration laws in about 1924.
My eldest BIL just retired as the pulpit rabbi of one of these so named shuls near Boston after some 30 years.I am not the ‘typical’ member of the CR in that all of my children, myself and MRS CTL AND our sons-in-law and daughters-in law have college and professional degrees. This means each individual has earning capabilities that can let each couple stand on its own.
You are pursuing a college path as well as learning. You are very young and need not rush to marry until you are in the workforce. I know that many will consider this as heresy, BUT the frum community needs baal batim who can support our institutions financially as well as those who mostly learn and are not in the workforce full time.From experience, I don’t believe that family money should be the support of young marrieds, giving a hand now and then is one thing, true full financial support is another.
The most important thing about family money and financial background is that you and your eventual bride should not come from a very different socio-economic background. There are enough other problems in a marriage without this type of huge roadblock to happiness.
All of our females in the CTL family including my mother, mother-in-law and grandmothers (all American born) had professional careers (law, accounting, teaching, real estate) besides raising families and running a household in partnership with a husband.
I still cook, wash dishes and do my own laundry and help with grocery shopping. When I married Mrs. CTL all those years ago, I was marrying a partner, not a housemaid/cook
Commercially sold chopped liver is NOT chopped, it is put through a meat grinder and has the consistency of a paste. Please don’t call it pate. A good pate will have small chunks of meat in it that you can chew.
We don’t put our chopped liver through the meat grinder, we use a hochmesser (mezzaluna) in a wooden bowl and make a coarse chop. I want to know I’m eating meat, not paste.The commercial frozen brands mentioned in this thread call themselves ‘spreads’…yukkkk
Like Mammele we use mayo in our chopped liver. Like yehudayona we avoid the strong beef liver. we use 2/3 chicken lover, 1/3 calve’s liver. We also grind in one stale egg bagel in a batch containing 2lbs raw liver, 6 hard boiled eggs and 1lb sauteed onions. garlic powder, salt and white pepper. It must sit overnight in the refrigerator and then you either pour off and oil that has risen to the top (you had too much) or mix in more mayo if it is too dry.
Never use matzo meal or bread crumbs as they make the mixture gritty.Lightbrite…………..
sorry to burst your bubble BUT pencils come in other numbers besides 2. There are 2 different scales for lead pencils. One rates the hardness of the lead, the other the blackness of the impression.
Boys were required to take mechanical drawing and drafting in Junior High School when I attended and we used #2,3 and 4 both hard and soft versions.Most exams read by optical scanners are designed for #2 pencils and instructions require their use, but the others exist.
Article 1 Section 11 (Equal Protection of laws) was amended in 2001 to add the words ‘or her’ to his in apply rights and protection from discrimination.
Our teachers didn’t issue pens, we were required to [provide them. I used a Waterman fountain pen (I still have it) a 9th birthday gift from my Zaidy…it had a 14K nib.
In 5th grade I had an annoying English teacher who made us write on yellow legal pads. I bought a bottle of Schaeffer Peacock Blue ink and my writing would appear green. She called my parenst and accused me of using green ink..against the rules. My father guaranteed I was using blue. After two months, we were using white paper.
I don’t use yellow legal pads in my practice, only whiteJust because the Federal Government changes their requirements doesn’t mean that northeastern Blue states will,
There is no Federal Equal Rights Amendment, but it’s part of the CT, MA and NY state Constitutions as an example.BenK…………
I’m older, live OOT, my children are all older, my grandchildren attend day school OOT>>>BUT
I’ve been on the Board of Day Shools and Yeshivos for decades.There are certain foods that they can receive as surplus from the US Dept of Agriculture to use for to feed students. NOT all students meet the Government requirements for ‘free lunch’ and the school would have to charge others.
The local day school all my kids went to switched to a catering company when it became cheaper than cooking in the school. The days of one bubbe manning the school kitchen are gone. Now with local health department inspections, schools required to have their staff graduates of a ServSafe program, salary and benefits for the employees, costs of kitchen equipment, washing equipment and plates, cutlery, etc. Government nutritional requirements on the ,eal served (whole grains, lo or no fat milk, veg and fruit servings. Problems that the Govt. surplus food may have a hechsherf that the school admin won’t use. We found it much cheaper to have a catering company bring in meals in disposable trays that simply need to be heated and everything gets tossed in the trash each day, no washing anything,My 4th grade general studies teacher wrote the word ‘penmanship’ on our preprinted report cards and a big red F. My parents protested adding a grade for a course not on the official curriculum. The grade was removed, I was sent to summer school to learn to type. Best skill for me to learn at a young age (this was before personal computers).
WTP
Many practices are continued for decades for no good reason, just because it’s easier to continue than learn a new routine.
Our area public schools introduce ink pens and cursive writing in the spring of 4th grade. By 78th grade the students will never use cursive again, and 90% of all assignments are done with a keyboard and submitted electronically.Since Bic, a French company was able to mass produce ball point pens, ship them across the Atlantic and retail them for 19 cents in the USA more than 50 years ago your theory about the Chinese does not apply.
BTW, I used a fountain pen in elementary school. It was a Waterman…the bladder needed filling at least once per day. You never knew when it would run out and we had bottles of Schaeffer ink in the wells on our desks…circa 1963
For all you youngsters:
It has nothing to do with writing control, muscle development, dexterity, etc.It goes back to the days before Ballpoint pens.
Little children could not be trusted to fill their fountain pens from the inkwells at the front of school desks. Old time desks had a cutout to hold the ink bottle. Children would make a mess with the ink. Girls’ long hair would be dipped in the ink by the child behind.
The lever on the fountain pen could turn the pen into a squirt gun to shoot ink at others.Lastly, fountain pens were much more expensive than a pencil. That’s why a fountain fen was a traditional Bar Mitzvah gift in the USA through the 1950s.
When ballpoint pens first came out they were very expensive $20-40. By the early 1960s Bic was manufacturing their blue stick pens to sell for 19 cents in the US. No longer did people stop at the bank or Post Office and refill their fountain pens for free at the checkwriting stand.
Little kids shouldn’t carry penknives (pocket knives) to school to sharpen a quill tip on a pen.
Old habits die slowly and most of you and the teachers are far too young to remember these things and new reasons are invented.
Ask you bubbe or zaidy (if they are 75 or older about inkwells and filling fountain pens in school
Hope Mills, NC
Kitty Hawk, NC
Anna Maria, FL
Mary Esther, FLCrisfield, MD
Glenarden, MD
Marydel, MD…..my oma’s name was Del
Rock Hall, MD
Greenwood, DE
Frankford, DE
Ellendale, DE
Fawn Grove, PA
Brookneal, VA
Allendale, SCBellevernon, PA
Glen Campbell, PA
Glen Hope, PA
Glen Rock, PA
Honey Brook, PATypo….Arietta is NH, not NY
using only first names
Alfred, Maine
Arietta, NY
Colebrook, Connecticut
Fayette, Maine (I had a tante named Fay and another named Ette)
Franklin, Connecticut also one in Mass.
Henrietta, NY
Hopedale, Mass.
Melrose, Mass.
Using a first name and a last name
Lynnfield, Mass
Maxfield, Maine
Brookfield, CT
Bradford, VT
Using 2 last names
Bloomfield, CT (also VT)
Greenfield, NH
Marshfield, Mass.
Northfield, Mass
Northford, CT
Westford, VTMy daughters and wife have no problem carrying a Kindle or iPad mini computer in their purses. I’m posting on my Kindle Fire right now.
Mrs. CTL wanted one for cleaning up all the dog kibble in the room where our 4 are fed. We spent the $600 on a Roomba. It went all around the room spreading the kibble, not containing it. It worked just fine in other rooms with carpet, not so well on hardwood floors or tile. After a week of disappointment, we returned it for a refund.
Now, that spring has arrived the kibble bowls have been moved outside onto the porch, less to clean up ion the house.shab29…………………….
This depends on the rules of the individual game/lottery
Many do NOT allow non-humans to collect prizes.
There was a case about 5 years ago when an individual donated the winning game-piece in a McDonald’s Monopoly promotion to a charity. The charity attempted to redeem and the piece was confiscated and no prize paid out, because the rules stated the prize had to be claimed by an individual.One of the local day schools on whose board I sit, contracts out all scholarship requests to a business that provides this to Private Schools, both religious (Jewish and non-Jewish) and secular.
The company provides parents with a packet that must be completed. The parents are assigned a number to place on all documents and the personal identifiers are redacted before the packets are analysed by the staff.
The Day school receives back a report with a suggested amount of tuition forgiveness (scholarship) for each applicant by number.
The scholarship/finance committee at the day school determines the total dollar amount of tuition relief that may be granted for the year. It is sent back to the outside company who apportions it to the applicants by percentage to be forgiven. A final report comes back to the school and parents are notified of the award and what the tuition bill will be. Parents then make a decision to accept and sign a contract or reject and find other sources of assistance or another school.This outside system has relieved the stress of volunteers and their reluctance to serve on the day school board and/or scholarship committee. No favoritism comes into play using the outside company.
I learned about this 10 years ago when I was asked to sit on the Board of a local secular Prep School. Sometimes, we have to look outside the box
Lightbrite…………
This is lifelong business and management consultant advise, not legal advice:
You are correct, it should be kept secret to avoid the vultures and scammers who will flock to you.
You should first speak to a professional.
That may be your estate (wills and trust), business or tax attorney, if you have one. NOT the lawyer in a general practice who closed your real estate or handled your car accident.
It might be your Tax Professional (CPA, CMA or other accountant who does your taxes). That Tax professional will be able to recommend a qualified lawyer to handle setting up a trust.
DO NOT Talk to a Certified Financial Planner or other commission salesperson (Insurance or Stock Brokers for example).If you put the asset into a Trust there generally is no need for an LLC.
Some tax authorities (varies by state and/or country) and some Lottery Operators (Same variance) allow the Trust to collect the winning directly.
In 1992 I had one client win a $10 million state lottery. The state permitted Trusts to collect winnings (as opposed to a human individual).Take the lump sum distribution, pay the taxes and put the money into a trust.
You never know what will happen to the entity running the lottery.
Today the Commonwealth of Puerto Rico (part of the USA) filed the equivalency of bankruptcy.
Many US citizens who live in states such as NY that have state income taxes bought Puerto Rico tax free bonds (commonly called municipal bonds, even when not issued by a municipality).
US Law exempted this interest from state income tax.No one know when and if these bonds will be paid off, or if the interest will accrue to be paid later.
The Lottery authority can go bust, the insurance company that issued the annuity to fund the payout can go broke.A typical lump sum distribution is about 50%…I’m sure you could live nicely for the rest of your life on 25 million less taxes. I have trust clients earning 7% year in year out since 1984 in portfolios I manage.
So, Put 10 million in the trust after taxes, spending and charity and you could live quite nicely on 700K income per year“Those Frum schools that do that because of the parent clientele. It’s not ideal. It’s usually Kiruv types of schools!”
In my experience, it has nothing to do with ‘parent clientele.’ It has do do with the cost of opening/running a school in a small frum community.
It may not be your ‘ideal.’ but ideal for the particular community.
Most OOT communities don’t have Kiruv type of schools and Non-Kiruv type of schools. They have an orthodox day school, period. Many run by Chabad, others part of Torah Mesorah
The Day school in the New Haven area that is mixed gender in the primary grades has existed for almost 75 years. Their Girls High School for 50, BUT there have been 4 Boys high Schools in the past 50 years that have failed. Families want their little kids and girls at home, they are willing to send teen boys away for high school.Lilmod………..
response to #1& #2
Please go back and read the original post, these girls have not been in school for weeks, not a few days
#3 Motions for changes in custody in Family Court can usually be heard the same day they are filed (Ex-Parte Motion) or next business day with both parties present. Because the scenario I laid out states the children have been out of school, no set date exists for their return and no alternate school has been chosen AND the father only seeks physical custody until the end of the school year, the motion will be viewed as an emergency and most Judges would hear it ex-parte without the mother having to be present. It would take almost no effort to have a case worker from DCF testify that the children are not receiving a proper education.
#4 is solved with a doctor’s note, AGAIN the OP states weeks, not a few days.Remember, I don’t claim to be an expert on all types of law, and always preface my opinions that I practice here in Connecticut (but am also licensed in Massachusetts and Florida, BUT I have practiced Family Law (Marriage, divorce, adoption, custody, wills and trusts) for almost 40 years and have also taught these courses as an adjunct professor in law school.
The fact that a Frum couple doesn’t usually use the civil courts doesn’t mean that a social services agency might not get involved and do so.