ctab

It doesn’t seem like the community here is so receptive, disappointingly so.
There was a similar thread in a Jewish Wellness blog, OKClarity, which might be of interest to you. I’d highly recommend checking this site out anyway because it’s geared specifically to mental health within the Jewish community.
While I cannot personally relate I completely understand where you’re coming from; I highly recommend that you consider speaking with a trained professional about these feelings, if it is indeed PTSD that you’re suffering from.