cherrybim

However, there are various degrees of heteirim: During the year we need music to calm our nerves. Also music during the year music is permitted for a s’udas mitzva.

But it could be that according to the M’chaber and Rav Moshe, the music that they assur all year is lively music, not classical or dirges. So perhaps this type of music would be permitted during s’fira as well (it IS muter according to Rav Saloveichik and my Rav). Can this logic be extended to an avel all year, and during s’fira. I don’t think anyone will give a public heter, however, maybe yes to a private heter.

If this story is true, it would be a Chillel Hashem in a big way.

They have murdered and raped Yidden for the last 2,000 years which include the crusades, the inquisition, in pogroms and the Holocaust.

And the Chutzpa! When the Vatican allows Jews the privilege of publishing a stolen manuscript, it is on condition that we thank and acknowledge the Vatican library for their kindness and generosity; it must be printed on the cover page of every sefer published from a Vatican manuscript.

So the Chief Rabbis should have ordered the pope to return all that were stolen from us.

Otherwise, it is indeed a Chillul Hashem.

I can only try: Yes there is tremendous pressure to give in. Many times one or two people (usually teachers or managers who think they know everything and are used to giving orders and having their way) take over. However, once they see that you won’t capitulate and that you are logical, they have no choice but to take you seriously. Like I said, each jury member has tremendous power and should use it wisely.

anon for this:

Yes, two jurors may not change the verdict entirely, although it has happened, but you can force a compromise since the rest of the panel either want to go home or they don’t want a hung jury. At the very least you can compromise or have a no decision on a few counts. This (compromising) is why jury decisions often do not make any sense and are at times conflicting.

Baruch Hashem for His kindness. But perhaps “K’tonti micol hachasadim”; will the claim of ignorance be accepted again?

Except for davening, I still don’t think it’s always appropriate to wear a hat indoors, especially when at a shiur and your hat is blocking the view of those behind you…you can’t get much ruder than that.

On the one hand, Rav Moshe gave a heter for music during the year since we are a nervous society and music calms the nerves. Also, the dancing “macholos” referred to in halacha is skilled fancy step dancing, not putting one foot in front of the other that is done at many simchos.

On the other side, there are poskim who hold that the instrument player which produces sound from tapes, records, CDs is no different from any musical instrument that produces music sound.

squeak: So far, yours is the winner, and no fat too.

Too bad you have to wait so long to enjoy it. Add a bunch of corn to the mix and you’ve got yourself some mighty fine mash brewing.

Invite me over in 12 years for some l’chaim kiddush; a little matjas and some kichel. Me’ein Olam Habah! Hopefully, this will take place in Yerushalayim, B’vias Ha’Moshiach.

Es tu ,squeak?

Just kidding…thanks for the correction.

Sorry mod, but I have yet to hear of a king going to a hotel for Pesach.

Au Contraire, on Pesach we are Kings and Queens, Princes and Princesses in our own palaces, our homes, that is filled with kedusha.

Anon for This: There is a lot more to Pesach preparations than “just” cleaning, which if done with halacha in mind as per Rav Scheinberg (above) is as difficult as you want make it.

I’m sure every family has its fair distribution of responsibilities which include: cleaning; shopping; baking/buying matzos; changing over the kitchen; kashering; food preparation; selling the chometz; searching for the chometz; burning the chometz; preparing the items for the k’ara; cleaning the Romain; cleaning out the car; etc; etc. You know it’s done when Pesach has arrived; until then there is always something else to do.

And as David S. has learned in a parallel thread, 30 days before the Chag we begin studying the halachos of Pesach so that we are very knowledgeable concerning its laws and customs.

But, you can have an attitude that these are all dreaded chores and who needs it? Or, you can create an excitement in all the involvement of preparing for Pesach: call your Rav with questions (that what he’s there for); give yourself a good head start so that your not overwhelmed; and you should not be doing everything yourself.

I don’t want to pry but with us, our daughters who all come with their families, all take part in the cooking and preparations and that adds to the special delight.

Your mother, on the other hand, will contribute in her own way and will enjoy her Pesach just being with her family for Pesach and the sedar.

I think, practically speaking, there are so many halachos to learn l’inyan Pesach and you want to continue your regular learning so unless you’re a Rav or in Yeshiva; WHO has the time to also darshan halachos of pesach, especially before Pesach? Asking l’maise shailos, of course, is part of learning hilchos Pesach.

Your lomdeshe piece, however, would make for a great Shabbos Hagadol drasha.

I think there are times when many of us get carried away.

lesschumras: Can you explain why someone is bothered because people are bothered that Jews: drink Cholov Staam; daven without a hat; wear a costume on Purim; or who go away for Pesach? You’re not going to change their opinion.

Jothar: I agree with those who are saying that the Chag is best spent ideally with your own Rav, in your own home with family; or at the very least with family in their homes.

We work with enthusiasm so that Pesach in our home is k’halacha, l’chatchila, and more, and knowing that and being with family and invited guests makes for an incredible simcha. So, yes Jothar, offer me an all expense paid Pesach at a hotel and it would be my pleasure to refuse.

For the life of me, I couldn’t imagine myself as going out of Mitzrayim when at a sedar in a hotel.

And I also have chaveirim who work as mashgeechim at hotel kitchens both during the year and especially for Pesach. First, they have no Sedar, no Pesach, and no Shabbos for themselves. But the money is very good, so that’s the trade off.

But they ALWAYS come back with horror stories; even of things that happen right in front of the masgeeach’s own eyes (one recent story is that one kitchen staff was slicing meats on the electric slicer and had a stick of butter hidden and would apply it to the blade to make it work smoother).

Basically, you can ask that question about any characteristic in a dating relationship:

Does height matter?

Does weight matter?

Does background or nationality matter?

Does money matter?

Does degree of frumkeit matter?

I know of several instances where the girl was somewhat older than the boy (up to 10 years); or where the boy was much older than the girl (up to 20 years) and the marriages are wonderful with wonderful children.

Chazal, however, states that you’re asking for trouble when the fellow is old and the bride is young. Human nature says the young woman will eventually look elsewhere when her needs are not met.

Although the chag has ended, please note for the future: on Purim we tend to let our guard down and for good reason; we are happy and relaxed and are in the mode of “achva v’reius”. We allow strangers into our home (groups of bochrim; collectors; etc.) and are not as alert to what is going on as we would normally be.

There are many times when strangers have a license to roam about our homes, i.e., Purim; Sheva B’rochos; L’chaim; Vort; etc. I was at a Sheva B’rochos several years ago where the hostess left her diamond ring on the window ledge above the kitchen sink when she washed for bread and discovered it missing during the meal. There was a house full of people she not know and she let her guard down because of the simcha. Purim is no different.

In the 1950’s, 1960’s and early 70’s, Yeshivos out of New York City did not provide Cholov Yisrael milk. So I guess the Roshei Yeshiva of yesteryear, the real g’dolim, considered it a Shas Had’chak, whatever that means.

There is absolutely no inyun to drink liquor on Purim.

Anyone see the pronouncement in the papers yesterday signed by over 50 Roshei Yeshiva and Rabbonim with regard to drinking on Purim and the ban of giving drinks to bochrim coming in groups to homes to collect?

Joseph, are you saying that I am mistaken or that the Posek is mistaken in what he said?

Also, could you rephrase paragraph one; I missed the point.

Oh, before I forget, for all you provocateurs and prevaricators out there who like to name drop G’dolim as proof to your false pronouncements:

TJ said – “I don’t know exactly how embarrassment factors into p’sak regarding handshaking, but I can offer some conjecture. (1.) According the preponderance of poskim, there is no inherent issur involved in physical contact with a woman – it is dependent on the type of contact and whether it is “derech chiba v’ta’avah.” In a case where the person would be embarrassed if you don’t shake their hand, that concern itself may affect the halachic nature of the handshake given that the circumstances are such that you are only handshaking to avoid the other person being humiliated. As such, such a handshake might not be considered “derech chiba.” (2.) The Taz and the Shach have a fairly meikel view of physical contact. The Shach, for example writes that physical contact is only assur if it is “derech ta’avah v’chibas bi’ah.” It seems like these opinions would mattir handshaking. Perhaps the threat of humiliation justifies following a more lenient opinion. (3.) The Yerushalmi’s consideration of “ain yetzer hara matzui l’sha’ah” is an additional factor that might be relied upon when there is a threat of embarrassing someone. (4.) A non-sakana type of mishoom eivah can override a d’rabanan. In the case of a goyah, she an ervah mid’rabbanan, and therefore lo sikrevu would only be d’rabbanan even l’fi HaRambam. As a result, avoiding embarrassing a goyah might be an additional factor to justify handshaking.”

I have observed frum men in professional settings holding their hands behind their backs when in conversation with women; or holding papers or glasses in one hand while holding a drink in the other thus creating an innocent obstacle to hand shaking.

I once heard from a Rav and Posek in Flatbush: When a couple adopt an infant and raise the baby as their own; the halacha is that when the child becomes of age, all contact between the father/daughter or mother/son must cease and Yichud issues apply as well. But, says the Rav, no Posek will ever tell them that they must adhere to these rules.