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“What about someone who wears colored shirts and no hat even on shabbos, but wears his tzitzis out?”
No human can measure another person’s yiras shomayim, and that’s not what I was referring to.
But who would I expect a bochur like the one you just described be his most likely (but not necessarily, iron clad) shidduch prospect?
A super-frum, davens every day, speaks no (or litte) loshon horoh, young woman who probably clocked more kiruv hours this month, than I did in a whole year. But she wears a North Face down jacket, with the ski-lift tags dangling from the zipper pull.
Nothing wrong about that; its just not in sync with the “brim down in middle of the week” bochur.
“be their spouse for a day”
Uh, maybe not the best idea in my case, ’cause if I were my wife, I’d strangle my husband! (kidding, just kidding)
But if I were my wife for a day, you can be sure I’d NOT spend it the way she does! (I mean, talk on the phone for an hour? Iron a weekday shirt like its being worn to a wedding? Nor would I spend it shopping).
So what would I do? Hmmm.. late breakfast / even later lunch for openers sounds like a plan. That gets me trhu about 3:00pm. What to do for the rest of the day? Wait, I know.. Nap time! (and take-out for supper… yeah!)
This is going to sound bizzare (and I’m not even sure the Mods will let it go thru), but since I’ve already done/said pretty much I can as a 40+ y/o father…
For just one day? (Ready for this)
I’d like to be Sacrilige till 8:00pm, and then Blinky for the rest of the day.
I say this beacuse they have (what is IMHO) the most potential, in terms of street smarts and sensitivity, yet with the hind-sight of experience, they could put their ideas into motion that could really start a revoloution.
Just for a day, right?
“Some of the controversal topics are just too controversal for me”
So pick a topic, roll up your sleeves (not past the elbow, though), and give it your best shot, Blink. Who knows; you might just find some moxie you never knew existed! (but that is surely there)
Good point. In sales, we call it the rifle vs the shotgun. Both make a point, one is more focused.
For the benefit of those who can learn from your experience, please keep posting!
Not only that, I even let my kids observe “please” and “thank you”.
Role models, us BPers!
I set the alarm for 2:30. The whole family woke up for it, stayed up for about 30 minutes and then went back to bed.
Small sacrafice to see niflaos haboreh. And as an added bounus, because the moon’s glow was somewhat dimmed (yet the surrounding sky was well lit) we were able to see many stars that are normally not visible in NYC.
Def worth losing sleep over
Weekdays – brim up
Shabbos / Yom tov (or suit occasions, like a wedding or vort) = brim down.
Wearing a brim down mid-week is a VERY yeshivish move, and would mean a whole different type of shidduch (no, I’m not kidding)
Its up there with tzitis in or our. It speaks volumes.
This is applicatble until around 45-50. Not past that yet, but I would imagine the rules are different. But for a bochur? Its VERY telling
Funny you should mention this, Eclipse. For a time, I was commenting on almost every post, and then last week (due to work related issues) I was not able to log in for a few days.
Know what? I realized that not every thread needs my 2 cents. Not becasue its a thread not worth my time, (which is NOT the case), its because some threads are simply not an area in which I can make a meaningful comment, or the thread has already been commented on so many times, there is little left for me to add.
But it would be nice if “hits” were also recorded, so the OP can see if the topic is generating traffic (nothing as sad as a post that fades because of lack of activity)
birds chirping, as I walk thru the park
the wind in my ears, as I whizz downhill on bicycle
applause, as I take a curtain call (you voided the “gunshot” line, so I had to think of something else 🙂
Stepping on something unprintable!
As someone who straddles the line of yeshivish and chaddidish, I doubt the “beshow” process will work for yeshivish / litvish singles for one reason only: they are better educated than their parents, so they think they’re smarter than them too.
In the chassidishe velt, the singles are raised on the belief that the “friedike dor” is the be-all, end-all, so if momma / poppa says xyz, its xyz.. even if the modern world says otherwise.
My kids (and most likley, my future D-I-Ls) know more than me / Mrs, when it comes to raw data, and tech info. But are they smarterr? Hmm….
I think the big culprit of the 40-50 age slot is the fact that you ususally don’t have the time to take care of yourself as you did in your 20-30-40 slot (more kids, longer working hours, more stress, less time to exercise / eat right). Plus, the overall lifestyle (more simchas to attend, later nights, more driving) work against you
Making a meal at home takes time and focus. Buying take-out on the way home takes $40. Walking 3 miles takes about an hour and burns calories; driving 50 miles burns gasoline.
Convenience is a great thing. But it also takes a great toll.
And one more thing. Several people have made the comment, “having a computer / internet is the same as having a TV”.
While I recognize the need for the homebound to have some form of entertainment and/or company, the TV is solely for entertainment, while the computer can be(and hopefully is being) used for work and productivity.
Yes, the computer has its pitfalls, but its getting harder to live without one, while TV is getting easier to live without one.
I’m not going to comment on the “who has / who does not” issue, but the disclosure of The Goq and WiseWomen in regards to possessing a COFFEE MAKER!
Now, thats a shocker. I mean, we all need the occasional cupajoe on the sneak, but a coffee maker is like possesion with the intent to distribute.
(Anyone familiar with the legal system this great land of ours can tell you, this is serious business.)
I was afraid of that, but whats the alternative? Hide the fact that we have kids? Suppress each cute story we know of that pertaint to children? Or negate the fact that they are hard to raise?
I know how painful that topic is, and meant no harm. I sure hope none was taken.
Do you live in the settlements (or a place of similar danger), like Mamashtakkeh? Then you need one. Do you live in America? Do don’t need one (unless your business requires it)
Maah –
Did you mean to add a comment, or did you like my post so much, you just decided to re-post it?
Either way is ok, I’m just wondering.
“he’ll easily purchase the properties in foreclosure”
Fo’ shaw! (boy, have I been waiting to whip that line back at you Sac.. only with the correct spelling)
And once I get all the properties, I’m gonna turn it into a summer camp for over-privileged rich kids, so they don’t need to travel the same RT 17 as the regular kids do, and spare the parents from being gawked at on visiting day when they roar into the “regular camps” parking lots.
Vroom!
Simple.. it annoys the people around you!
Business as usual. The only difference between that boss and the next boss is one let it slip (but both feel the same way to some extent or another).
Hatizlaini na, miyad achi, miyad Eisav (please save me from the hand of my brother, from the hand of Eisav);
Sometimes he displays the “face’ of a brother, sometimes he lets his “eisav” ooze to the surface. Either way, he’s not your pal. Just take the money and watch your back.
And yes.. I’ve been there, and yes, its ugly. But that’s life in galus.
Best Ima is right.. raise 7 kids and you’ve already been thru gehenom!
Ask him if he can lend you $500. That should get rid of him for a while. Or loan him $1000. That should get rid of him forever!
(but try option # 1 first)
I used to do this, but my kids put a stop to it (They are right, it was pointless)
I can’t think of a single person who’s been in the CR (commenting or just reading) that has not been changed by what they read.
Ok, 80% of whats here is just chit-chat, but there have been several very moving posts, and several members that have said how much the comments meant to them.
That, and grasping your thumb with your other hand will protect you from the shaidim that were in the trees at night (the trees that lined the path from the shul to your bunk, where you needed to go to get your flashlight for night activity)
If you take the un-cut bilke from shaleshudos, pierce it with the knife you used to cut the bilke you ate at shaleshudos, place it under your pillow, wake up at midnight and look in the mirror, you’ll see the person you’re destine to marry.
Heard in Camp Mogen Av, back in the ’70s
Not sure what you call “first” so I’ll list them all, up till my present one:
at 12, I was babysitting (lasted all of twice, then I gave up)
at 16-17, I was worked in summer camp
at 17, I did a one-week stint in a take-out food place
at 18.5 I started working full time (whse work first, then became a numbers cruncher, once I got my degree)
FICTION? Speak for yourself, Pascha.
Other than the Rosh Yeshiva part, you just described a typical day at the BPT estate. (Grandpappa is the Executive Director of the yeshiva.. the pay is more timely, you understand).
Ok, I exaggerating about the estate part. Its really a modest triple lot.. nothing to get excited about, considering the mansion we have on Fisher Island
Funny will be if Sac and WIY really do end up dating at some point, but do not disclose their CR identities until the 3rd date.
Ok, now I get it. And the loose translation of “flassig” is vigorously
(whioh, BTW, I would have spelled as flaasig, but lets not nit-pick)
I think the rocking horse ranch offers day passes that will let you try lots of things, if the x-country skiing is not what you expect it to be (I think its easy enough to learn, but really tough from an aerobic standpoint)
Lakewood, what ARE ou talking about? And in any event, its Tzi not Tzu!
“chasidisher chaider”
See? You keep doing it. Its a ChassidisheH chay’der.
Boy, you litvaks keep us hassid guys in sticthes!
“.. completely serious from beggining to end”
I try to keep it light, but it really depens on the thread. Wanna see real seroius? Check out the last 2 posts I made in the “what I learned from my teenager” thread. That’s serious business, and I posted very seriously.
Same goes for car posts. Very serious business.
I’m expecting Sac to sound off any minute (she’s a huge sports fan)
Sorry I can’t join the fun.. it sounds like a real good story.
No, shticky, its not the Ponevitch shiur that tipped me off. Its the way you spell (and presumably pronounce) certain words that scream out BORSALINO at the top of your lungs.
(for example: “aller” instead of “alleh”
Dont feel bad about it; nothing that an extra slab of keegle and ice-cold Miller can’t cure. Oh and one more thing; every 5 forward-backward shukkles need to be augmented by 2 clockwise-counterclockwise rotations. That helps too (its got something to do with the inner ear)
Eclipse –
Same goes for you, but in a different way. We all face challenges; some bigger, some smaller, but to the person involved, its a mountain to climb.
Still, we are all in the same corral, and all fighting. Keep fighting.
SmileyFace –
You (and people like yourself) are one of the main reasons I post here. Not every post is directed to you, and perhaps not every post is relevant to you (and perhaps not every post is something you agree with).
But every post I write is prefaced with this:
Is what I’m about to write going to inspire people? Is this the advise I would give a friend? My own child? My spouse? If so, I write it. If not, I reconsider it, becuase I never know who will read what I write. And while I may not be able to inspire everyone, a mis-placed comment, a mean-spirted comment may just be the thing that turns someone off.
Not sure if you’ll read this, or comment on it, but hopefully someone will read it and think about how careful they need to be when writing.
(natch, my sarcastic jokes are not included in the above, but that’s made obvious from the thread its noted on, that its not serious)
Anyways, glad to see that you benefitted from the post (even if it wasn’t mine)
In our house, the last person to pour soda leaves an ounce on the bottom of the bottle. It does not happen with OJ, not with milk, not with anything else. But for some reason, soda seems to have this phenom.
Also seems to happen with candy. The 1st 95% goes pretty fast, but the last piece or two just lingers. Does’nt happen with dried fruit or nuts or baked goods, though. No idea why, but the chocolate and candy just linger
GRRRR!
My vote goes to Sam Zeitlin. Who’s that, you ask? He’s the cyclist that was in line to win a medal, yet walked away from the ’72 olympics because he became a BT (which saved his life, both literaly and figurativley)
Never. Period.
Try to only eat things you make at home
If you must but store bought food, try to avoid things that have more than 5 ingredients
Avoid anything with hydrogenated anything in it
Fill your plate with 50% salad, 25% main course, 25% side dish
No food past 8:00pm
Of course, exercise is a must. Otherwise, its like fighting with one hand tied behind your back. You can do it on diet alone, but you need to work much harder. Make life easy!
Remember that no matter who you are or how smart you are, there is someone that finds you irritating. Still, they tolerate you; you should tolerate others as well.
Flaws are ok; its what make us human.
We need to de-claw. Those make us inhumane.
“Stick to Lippa! “
Good choice! Another gem is “eeich vill zahn ah rebbe”
Oh, And Shticky, from the way you wrote your post, you’ve got LITVISH YESHIVA written all over the place.
Def time to start hangin’ wit da brothas!