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why sit on teh couch and do nothing when you can sit on teh couch and post on YW 😀
what if youre broken down to your atoms and then reassembled…
i buy shirts for 80 dollars…because i like 80 dollar shirts 🙂
YES OMG I WOULD DIE WITHOUT MY ANDROID!!!
conversos were the ones who actually DID convert…not those who practiced judaism in secret
no idea…but for the rest of you who post on this threwad, please refrain from using the word “marrano” its offensive.
check chabad zmanim
gut shabbos 🙂
whatever…its the loss of my readers…not my loss
I have proof that he is…its not a baseless claim.
i usually post at work…so thats where im bored 😀
and no adorable he is NOT accommodating. not only did he refuse to remove my post but he used an alternate account (achosid) to try and bait me into releasing part two of that series on YW.
what for? mod 80 cant directly contradict a “psak” by the editor…he specifically posted on the moderator forum section whatever thingy telling the mods not to accommodate me…
no adorable it was editor. this was about my mental illness thread and my asking for its deletion…he never complied
i post here because im bored but i no longer post my articles here
well its more stigma in general not really shidduchim…you saw my mental illness thread
ive exchanged quite a few emails with him. the feeling is quite mutual.
im passionate about certain subjects…i think everyone already knows that about me 😀
“And you are paying for the refrigeration.”
HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH 😀
well…i know for a fact that YWEditor dislikes me…
surely you meant “well”…because “doing good” makes no sense
😀 😀 😀 google the terms i used of youre curious 😛 i was explaining how E-SATA works
its actually neodymium…its a naturally occurring magnet other than lodestone…most commercial magnets are just regular pieces of ferrous metals which are magnetized. neodymium is naturally magnetic and its VERY strong. ever wondered why a neocube is called a neocube? now you know…teh balls are neodymium.
a LOT faster. USB transfer is at 480 Mbps minus overhead whereas E-SATA connects directly to the sata bus and therefore transfers at full SATA 2 speeds of 3 Gbps
seems people only have problems with shameless advertising…how about shameful advertising? is that acceptable?
wait…what?! 3 x 2…im almost certain that none of teh i5s are designed for tri-channel…why would a company sell a product like that…
just one shabbos?
no. i dont plan on using a normal shadchan. ill either go to my rav or people i know (parents of friends…family friends…etc…) it just galls me to think that others think me inferior for no good reason.
to all those who are talking about compatibility…let the two parties decide??? why must shadchanim automatically filter it by “family type x” and “family type y?” although to be fair im placing all the blame on the shadchanim and not enough on everyone else…its wrong to deny someone a chance at your son or daughter solely on the basis of religious and/or family history. its unfair and wrong. and its, frankly, quite hurtful. everyone can have problems. mainstream people, BTs, those from divorced families, those without families such as orphans, everyone has problems. but to deny someone access to your kids because of a problem they MAY have due to something out of their control is awful.
i should probably allow for a distinction as far as baalei teshuva are concerned. someone who is a tinok shenishbuh, i can understand, would be viewed differently than someone who went off the derech and came back on. i dont like it…but i can understand it. so perhaps i should have made that distinction earlier. that being said, what good is teshuva if its not accepted? if its good enough for hashem should it not be good enough for us?
this is slightly unrelated but it reminds me of a shmuz by rabbi shaeffer on teh subject of “religious atheism” IOW the idea that you know the torah better than hashem does. a guy separated from his wife, she has teh kids. hes refusing to give a get. so he comes to this guy and asks him why he refused. he said because hes concerned that if she remarries teh new husband might not have the same ideals in chinuch as he does. to which rabbi shaeffer (i think it was him who was talking to teh guy…eitehr way the story stands) replied but its halacha…the guy refused.
so he asks the guy, what if rav elyashuv came and told you to give a get, would you? teh guy said no…im worried about the chinuch of my child. so he goes further…if eliyahu hanavi came and told you to give a get, would you? teh guy said no. if a bas-kol came out of shamayim and told you to give a get, would you? he said no. so teh rav gave up. teh guy clearly isnt following the torah for hashem’s sake but for his own. he doesnt have the emunah and bitachon necessary to realize that hashem made teh halacha allowing for all kinds of circumstances, his included. so he refused to give the get.
i think its similar to our discussion. everyone keeps saying how lofty baalei teshuva are, that they are in a higher place than even teh greatest tzaddik for what they did. yet no one wants to touch them. everyone tells them to have bitachon yet no one has enough bitachon to trust that maybe hashem knows what hes doing when it comes to baalei teshuva. bitachon apparently only works when its convenient. im willing to bet that if you asked teh gedolim about marrying baalei teshuva and those from divorced homes they would say “check the person out, if theyre sincere, good people, go for it” yet no one does.
so please…the next person who wants to tell me to have bitachon? hold your tongue. i have the necessary bitachon. the question is…do you?
ambulances would charge you…hatzalah doesnt
why teh heck would you want to buy a computer at an office supply store?! its bound to be overpriced.
regular zemiros? books…little medrash says? choose simpler tunes for your zemiros nothing too complex.
lol its not for my benefit…my problem is with people who have a problem with it because there really is no good reason for it.
ihavent been following teh trial…can someone link me to material i can read on teh subject?
“To put it starkly and I really hope I don’t offend anybody: We all try and integrate disabled people into mainstream life as best as possible. Would you accuse an able-bodied person who turns down a disabled shidduch as being stigmatizing, disgusting and feh to the system. I don’t think you would because you would recognise their would be a compatibility issue and marital harmony comes before any issues of non-discrimination.”
there is a significant difference between someone who is disabled and someone who may otherwise be perfect but who is afforded no chance by the system. i can understand why someone would not want to marry a person that may significantly inconvenience them due to their disability. its sad but understandable. however youre assuming that there is an inherent problem with marrying a BT or someone from a divorced home. that one comes with the other. and that cannot be further from the truth. you assume that there cannot be harmony between teh mainstream and the BTs and kids of divorced parents and thats offensive.
and yes. i know there are no kol korehs about not marrying BTs and those from divorced families. and i know its a capitalist system. i also know that its disgusting and that it MUST change. there really is no good reason for it. i eman even being subjective about looks is a better reason! theres no point marrying someone you arent attracted to. now maybe you have to work on yourself if youre too choosy and shallow when it comes to looks but everyone has a baseline. but to be categorically opposed to someone who is not like you in history…is wrong.
you all know it. and of you dont you all SHOULD know it. peopel always try and come up with reasons for their prejudices whether those reasons are justifiable or not. so i cant fault you for trying…but seriously. youre wrong.
and thats a lovely way of accepting the system. my point was its wrong. the preference is baseless. absolutely baseless. teh same could have been said about blacks “oh well i dont want to employ blacks because its just my preference” “why? idk…it just is…no specific reason…i just dont like them”
lol he has a point BPT 😛
id say find another job…and then threaten to quit. obviously if the job you find is better…quit anyway 😀
so youre saying that there is a good and justifiable reason to categorically bar baalei teshuva and those from broken homes from being redt to otherwise mainstream people?! why not let them decide for themselves. aint that a novel idea. at this point its been so stigmatized that no one wants to touch them. and its disgusting.
“”why cant it just be about 2 people who like each other?”
What a terrific question, especially since this approach seems to work wonderfully in the secular world. Why can’t we be like normal people? Let’s work on achieving a 50% divorce rate, ASAP!”
not what i meant…in teh secular world its about 2 people being physically attracted. most couples have relations out of wedlock and then decide to marry after they’ve “test driven teh car” as it were. therefore teh marriage is predicated upon teh physical relations. when those are no longer as satisfying as they once were…teh basis of teh relationship is over and so is teh relationship. im not talking about that. im talking about just a normal…idk what you wanna call it…friendship type like? im not advocating hanging out or guys and girls being friends with each other. but when they start going out on dates for shidduchim…it shouldnt be about dollars and cents and all those other extraneous variables.
yes, adorable.
Dr. Pepper.
wanna know why i take this so seriously? because im someone at a SERIOUS disadvantage. my family situation is so messed up…maury povitch would probably faint if he heard it. and that makes me unwanted. FOR NOTHING I PERSONALLY DID! but because my PARENTS made awful decisions. im punished for it. for no good reason. name me ONE good reason why someone from a broken home is incapable of themselves building a loving home?! oh because they had no example? i know plenty of people who came from “perfect” homes who are terrible cold and distant parents. so dont give me that.
in my eyes a baal teshuva REALLY IS greater than myself. whats said about them being at a higher place than anyone else, i actually take to heart. . now i may end up finding someone who comes from a broken home and is a baalas teshuva…but if i do i want it to be because she is the right one for me. not because some bigoted shadchan thought thats all i could get. that we were both second class and therefore relegated us to that sickening caste system.
everyone has some activism in them…my cause is unfair stigma. those of you who read my article about mental illness know that about me. well this is no different. and it has to stop. everyone talks about a “shidduch crisis” and that guys and girls cant find each other. WANNA KNOW WHY?! BECAUSE HALF THE POTENTIAL MATCHES ARENT BEING REDT!!! you can talk about bashert all you want…but if you turn your nose up at your bashert becuase she wasnt frum all her life? guess what…YOU BLEW YOUR CHANCE AT YOUR BASHERT!!!
EDITED
OTB no. im gonna be just as judgemental as i want to be. every group has oddballs. you have greased up kolel guys who are REALLy weird and yet no one applies a stigma to kolel guys. i refuse to let up on this. i truly believe that the discrimination against BTs is absolutely disgusting. instead of welcoming them with open arms we treat them like mamzerim who can only marry a specific group. no. its awful. no guy or girl who is in their early 20’s is EVER redt a BT. EVER. you hit 30? all of a sudden the shadchanim roll out the “wonderful ballas teshuva girls” what happened then they were early 20 huh? were they any less wonderful? or were teh shadchanim just being small minded bigoted idiots?! ill go with teh latter!
i feel very strongly about this issue as you can probably tell from my posts on teh subject. and no. my opinions are set. i WONT let up. i hate how things work with a passion.
only real difference is teh ram…the newegg one has more of it
tzippi, my point wasnt taht beis medrash isnt important. on teh contrary…i KNOW it is. i and one of my friends opted out of beis medrash and another one of our friends is in his 3rd year and i really see a difference between us. i KNOW it makes a difference. my point was simply that people believe in it not necessarily because of its importance but because of belief in the “system” especially with kolel. prime example of this is one of teh first questions posed to girls when they want to get married “do you want a kolel guy or a working boy?” seriously? thats teh first question?
i…GAH! its threads and stories like these that have framed my opinions on the whole shidduch scene. as i said in another thread (one i started) the whole process has become so industrialized. “he is from here here and here and shes from there there and there…he went to school X she went to school at Y his family is Z hers is A must be a perfect match!”
im sorry but i must object. why cant it just be about 2 people who like each other? maybe im being a bit naive or maybe ive just been influenced by teh american media…but i think the cookie cutter approach to shadchanus is disgusting. it shouldnt be about teh families or the money or the yichus or whatever…i mean seriously. youre choosing the person with whom you will build a family and spend your life, it shouldnt be brought down to extraneous variables. the families arent marrying, the boy and girl are. leave teh families and circumstances out of it.
another thing that always annoys me is the way people are all for kiruv…until its their son or daughter marrying teh product of said kiruv. teh way baalei teshuva are treated in shidduchim is absolutely disgusting. teh NIMBY approach taken to these wonderful people is so hurtful. i would be proud to marry a baalas teshuva.
gah…ive ranted about this many times before but it still gets me. especially since its going to be relevant to me in 2 or 3 years. i dont care how it was done in europe, i dont care what the tradition is, i dont care how shadchanim have been doing it for hundreds of years, the system is ridiculous. its self completely self serving and not acting in teh best interests of prospective couples.
charlie…you made me cry. i am sad. my day is ruined. thank you.