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I went to BY intensive seminary in 2010.
AMAZING sem.
There were different types of classes, it appears they try to be good about giving you your preferences. My class was a beautiful mix. a class of 32 we had about 18 out of towners including toronto, Lakewood, Monsey, 5 towns …
The class had a few chassidish kids, some very yeshivish and many very mainstream, and 2 Sefaradim. It was an unbelievable experience. The motto gotta be “accept and respect” and then you are A ok.
The dorm is amazing. Not that I stayed there but I practically lived there.
my neighbor suspected her cleaning lady for stealing her diamond earrings – she was sure she put them on her night table and they were not there. She came down to call my father since her husband wasn’t home. My dad came up and yelled at her and threatened her that she better give back the earrings or else… she promised she didn’t take them
that night, as my aunt was lying in her bed, she felt something pricking her – – – yes you guessed, it was her earrings! she put them under her pillow instead…
one of the million:
The time I bumped into a mirror at a wedding hall and “told the person i bumped into” I’m sorry… 🙂
Rabbi Akiva Tatz, Rabbi Jonathan Rietti, Rabbi Shimshon Pinckus, Rabbi Dovid Gottleib to mention a few…
Thanks Squeak. gov. programs are here to help those who seriously need it. funny that some zip codes in neighborhoods we know have the most banks, the biggest money rollover and the highest foodstamp and programs rate….
use the programs if you NEED them, but not out of “it’s free so take it” attitude which leads you to a train wreck in the end of the day
Realisticaly speaking, $2000 dollars a month in a typical community should have you covered.
say 1300 rent, 400 groceries, 200 utilities, 100 for odds and ends that keep coming up….
my grandfather made aliyah many years ago from canada. he didn’t speak the language, and was embarassed that he did nothing with his day. one day he met a friend, who asked him what he does. my grandpa answerd him:
“listen, i’m a kohen, and here in Israel they duchan every day. I have to untie my shoes, and retie my shoes, it keeps me very busy. i don’t have much time to do anything else”
MIND. lol
we frequently eat at a family that follows minhagei chassam soifer, and they don’t have salt on the table for the challah. when we come they always take out the salt for us.
even though, we could very nicely eat the cahllah without dipping in salt, but it’s just a derech hamoin am, so they put it out.
i would say you should do the same with mayim achronim. don’t make an issue out of it…
so the truth is, EVERY PENNY COUNTS. it’s true that someone who’s been around for longer, and has more money in the account can get fruther.
the truth is, i heard this from many, they left their previous money for savings, and started from scratch after the wedding. it works. say she holds a FT job, at min. $12 an hour, and earns at least 1450 after taxes etc. so she can usually pay for a standard couples apt. and 2 bills. then he brings home something, even if he’s learning, whcich pays the rest of the bills and food.
a young couple shouldn’t need any extras (yet). but if you need that, you can always take from different sources like wedding money, or savings. but most of the time, you get covered with $5 change…
stam FYI, while living in Israel, my wife had the same issue. my MIL – a klige yiddishe mame, said she found that the altitude and air pressure played a huge role in challah baking. therefore, the same recipe will turn out different in different places, especially in a mountainous place…
Just thinking out loud.
torah is to a boy, as ?? tznius ?? is to a girl?
i’m not sure, but from what i learnt in school, this is definitaley the comparison.
so now, “not every guy is cut out to learn” so would that guy be so kind as to marry the girl “who is not cut out to dress modestly?”
not that i’m making fun in any which way of non learners.
this is just a thought that jsut popped into my head.
to some girls, it is more important to live a life where they can make ends meet more easily with both of their pay checks.
living on a kolel budget is not all that simple. only one who appreciates what you get for it, can truely live a happy life making due with less. now, IMHO, most girls today are not at that point.
Most girls are drilled in school about the chashivus of torah and are strongly encouraged to take a husband that will sit and learn for many years for that is the ultimate goal of a man…
though, realistically, not everyone needs or appreiciates a learner.
as far as i know, min hatorah, having a girl friend is no issur at all, and if the girl keeps hilchos tahara then the boy friend may even touch her… but todays days, we need a lot a lot of gedarim not to get to this, for chas veshalom i don’t want to think if the ultra orthodox community got into this…
In E”Y, shabbos elevators are pretty popular. i know the belzer bais din is matir it’s use. there are a few others who permit it. AYLOR!!!!!
this is not a food, it’s a vitamin, but you CANT IMAGINE the difference. take a B-12! the combination of the right amount of B12and B6 gives you all the energy you can use in a day
well, Romance IS discontinued, and i’m :-(. but a friend just bought me from Lancome a bunch of samplers and i really like Tresor in love and Miracle by Lancome. they’re sweet smelling and good.
beep beep beep <motion detector>
FYI, there are companies who do this. find out about ptex group in Borough Park. i know there are a few such agencies. they hire a bunch of people to work in their call center, and they have plenty of companies using them.
p.s. they also do it for overseas companies.
bp27 – i feel uncomfortable when the spanish in the grocery are speaking spanish, so STOP SPEAKING SPANISH! what a joke. yes i speak 5 languages well, but i don’t understand 65 ohter languages in the world. so there. they havta stop using it? whatever for.
and just a suggestion, learn yiddish. i learnt it at the age of 14, and it’s very useful and easy to learn!
sorry, the list is tooooooo long.
just btw – no need to wait for the water to boil.
my fish is yum – same recipe, just put everything into a pot and let it cook for about 45 min = 1 hr.
Start with a visa of either a student or a tourist. keep renewing it.
ps it may be worth making aliyah, cuz u get $$ from the gov.
pps. with visas you are not entitled to many benefits which you would otherwise have
oh well Rabbaim.
so maybe you can explain to me why i see SO MANY older boys and gilrs roaming around in Chassidishe Borough Park?
i don’t think that’s true.
and yakov – if that’s your own chiddush – it’s gevaldig!
and if it’s already in there, well, it’s gevaldig anyway!
First of all, REMINDER:”minhag yisroel torah”.
Second of all, Grape Juice is NOT the best thing to use. at all.
i’m not chassidish and would rather use whisky then grape juice!
I don’t know about an extreme hakpadah in this inyan. but IMHO, stick to your crouds more then less.
it’s pretty hard to adjust to an entirely different way of life.
as open minded as you are, and as much as you think you know about that community, untill you become part of them, you really don’t know much about their values.
well, every teenager looks forward to make up.
and just like some people i know, when they get to use or do something they have been waiting for, in the begining it’s over exxxxagerated and then either it calms down or it doesn’t. (driving, texting, drinking, etc.)
also, understand that she might feel a little undermind, and this is her way of filling a need she’s lacking.
or maybe, she want’s to portray herself a certain way, that can only be achieved this way.
anyway, just be don lekaf zechus.
Bochur 22 i’d say you’re pretty accurate. i know couples who live a regular lifestyle finishing the month easily but with no extras at $2000.
but take into account tickets for going back for yomim tovim. also not very cheap.
my advice:
1. for unclogging a stuffed nose etc. AFRIN is the trick. BEWARE: it cannot be used for more then 3 consecutive days. though it is usual effective before that.
2. Sinus rinse from the mcneil company is a disgusting lifesaver. it washes out the sinuses and takes out all the dirt to relieve stuffed nose and headaches.
3. Sauna, steam bath, and maybe some amoxcillin
i din’t read other posts, but read your question. first of all ” 40 yom kodem Yetziras havlad” before created in the womb, not born.
just to note:
i heard in a shiur by a renowned darshan that the bashert is only destined for the girls. maybe this explains the gap bet. amount of boys and girls. YES, some boys were created for being bachlors! so you’ll ask about the older girl singels who never marry – they never got to their bashert. it was bashert they shouldn’t meet their bashert.
some mefarshim say a hub and wife are one neshama split in two parts. some neshamos aren’t split.
the only way to learn is from your mistakes. but life is too short to make all the mistakes, so learn from others mistakes.
Remember: in the street they still think we’re a normal family.
this is the one that comes in about 2 X a day:
“you never know till you try it”
OK. so i have some to add (taken from a bunch of diff. People and places, not all to i know a mekor to). Around the Year: Rosh Hashana – My French grandparents eat bananas, because “bon-a-nei” means good year in french. Kedem grapjuice “chadesh yameinu kekedem. square pasta in soup called pletzlech = our enemies should “tziplatst verin” (burst). round challos and honey until simchas torah.
succos – some chassidim sit down for a sec. in middle of kiddush by leyshev basuccah to make it literal. eating both meals shmini a. in the succah.
chanukah – girls light candels until they are married – and we’re not lubavitch.
pesach – not to use tap water all pesach, only bottled and put away before pesach. melt down the sugar to see- through liquid. schamaltz.
shavous- eating milky meal both days.
stam stuff – never say yigdal (nusach ari hakadosh), stand up for elokei neshama, no ldovid hshem in elul. say tehillim every day of elul according to spacific pattern. standing for lecha dodi, not saying “tzeischem leshalom” in zmiros (bobov). saying every passuk of havdala 3X (viznitz). eating sweet carrots and liver friday night. eating fish with hands. standing for kiddush at night and sitting by day. no dessert shabbos day. blessing the children friday night. vimpel. putting newborn in a drawr for first 3 mos. (skvere) . boots on shabbos (skvere). not going to the kosel (satmar). not using electricity on shabbos in israel (brisk).
sungha wong and fung wong had a little baby boy. the doctor showed them the baby – who had no resemblance to asians, and didn’t share any of their features. he was fare skinned, with normal features.
mr. wong looks at Mrs. wong and says: “listen honey, Two Wongs don’t make a White” so the named him – som ting wong
I feel so sorry for you. i didn’t get to read everyones posts, so maybe someone said this already.
i know it’s hard, very hard. but i don’t think the cops is the way to go.
if you feel like you are ready to end the marriage (and if you think so, just make sure you realize what that means and what it can bring like custody issues, money issues and you say his controlling, so that doesn’t help.bear in mind that he might terrorize the kids, try to kidnap them, sike them against you, drill into them to hate you etc.) it’s really heartbreaking.
if he says you could work things out, then in some way or another, convince yourselves to seek professional help from a team of psychologists and therapists – as hard as it may be, and as expensive as it may be. this might be the solution.
chances are that at this stage you will need family rehab.
obviously, your spouse is missing something very basic. it can be an emotional or physical or both. if his need will be fullfilled, everything will begin to be fine.
maybe he wants to feel more respected? more usefull? more important? more bossy? or many other things. it might be hard, but by filling that emptiness as hard as it may be, your salvation will come slowly.
also, your talking it out to someone, and getting chizuk from a strong trusted person, may help you heal the wounds and rebuild your relationship. I know that confidential hotlines exist, just donno which ones. do your research.
i wish you much hatzlacha and siata dishmaya from the depths of my heart. may there be no more suffering umongst our nation.
please post when things are going good too.
P.S. i’m sorry i can’t give you chizuk, but my heart is broken now.
i would say, you can very strongly pick up in a conversation with a person, what their feelings towards others are. how she talks about her family, friends, people she respects, people she hates (assuming you’re the boy) and you should get a strong feel.
yeserrie!! it’s surely the right thing to do!
Kern Chasanim of Bobov (and go for the one on 48st please)!!!
well. my family also had this minhag, and my 18 yr old sis would put up a fit, how it doesn’t make sense and she’s os embaressed about it… till my dear grandpa spoke to her and explained to her the shitah we hold and why this is what we do, and after she gets married iy”h she will not havta light cuz “ishto kegufo”
from that day on…. all was quiet
great split pea soup recipe found in the Heimishe cookbook – Neitra.
another delicious soup:
*****pumpkin Soup*****
chunk of pumpkin (brought in any vegg. store)
sweet potato cut into little pieces
cook in about 2 cups of water. when done, blend it down and you have a delicious, nutritious, thick soup
Perri Israel is unbelievable, though good luck with getting an appointment.
iv’e never seen a bigger meivin then her.
i bought and cut by karym – she’s great but very cutious with cutting – affraid of making a mistake. i wouldn’t mind some confidence….
well, if anyone watched taht video on gruntig, wehn the police on a motorbike arrives, and asks what’s up, the yerushalmi yells back ” hu mistovev po im bachurot, mevakshim mimeno sheyelech!”
no it wasn’t sikrikim it was the regular residents, and if his claim was correct – the faivish was hanging around with girls there, then he’s got a point, becuase EVERYBODY knows not to do such things in meah shearim – and obviously they weren’t just walking through the way normal people do, cuz then there wouldn’t be any objections to him cuz maybe it’s his wife, sister etc…
well, if anyone watched taht video on gruntig, wehn the police on a motorbike arrives, and asks what’s up, the yerushalmi yells back ” hu mistovev po im bachurot, mevakshim mimeno sheyelech!”
no it wasn’t sikrikim it was the regular residents, and if his claim was correct – the faivish was hanging around with girls there, then he’s got a point, becuase EVERYBODY knows not to do such things in meah shearim – and obviously they weren’t just walking through the way normal people do, cuz then there wouldn’t be any objections to him cuz maybe it’s his wife, sister etc…
and why would you care anyhow?
i sure hope you are strong enough not to get influenced by this place! i like hearing opinions and stuff, but i am who i am, and that’s where is begins and ends. let whoever wants post here, if they follow the standards, and don’t cause trouble….
though i doubt that a non jew would find intrest in this site since he has so many bigger “hasagos” so to say. or you know – reconsidering, i think this site would intrest anyone, especially outsiders!
a very cute game we played and was a ball was malarky with things that pretain to the family, community etc.
like someone asks “why do we eat sufganiot on chnukah” and 4 ppl. come up. 3 of them gotta make up a story, and one of them has the true answer – which by the way, try to choose a true answer that’s not so common/sounds rediculious. then everyone votes whos answer was teh correct one
enjoy
a friend invited me over for dinner. this was the menu:
ontray: potato blintzes w/ mushroom dressing
Soup: delicious
Main: Grilled Cicken, 3 tone potatos = sweet pt., red pt. and regular pt. baked in the oven, and apple turnover on the side.
dessert: peach halves
Thanks Jolly for the delicious supper! the food was great, but the company better!
a boy’s bar mitzvah is coming up.
his father is giving him a little prep talk.
“listen yossie, after you are bar mitzvah, it’s time to grow up. there’s no more talking in middle of davening, there’s no more playing around during shul time”
yossie turns to his father and asks:
“totty, when is your bar mitzvah gonna be?”