A Fiinnah Ba'alabusta Nut

There was once a גר who wanted to learn more about judisiem, specifically more about Shabbos and how to keep it right. His wife said he should go to speak to their Roov. His Roov suggested him to go to some site (on the line- using internet) that puts people’s up by other people for Shabbos.

He spoke to his Rebetzen, she said he should really go to these people for shabbos and get the most out of it as he can. So that’s what he did.

He arrived to his host Erev heilaggah Shabbos, chatted a bissel with the mishpacha, then went to Shul with the Ba’al Habus.

After Kabolos Shabbos, the Roov of that Shul made Kiddish- a la’chaim. So everyone had some. They got back to the house and the Ba’al Habus made kiddish on some wine. So everyone had some. In between the fish and soup they had a shot. By the main course they had a few shots.

The next morning after davening, by the kiddush the oilem made a bunch of la’chaims. They got home, the Ba’al Habus made kiddish. So everyone had some. Then there were a few more la’chaims during the meal.

Same thing during shal hashudas everyone had many la’chaims! Came havdalah time and they made it on, you guessed it, more alcohol!

Finally Motzie Shabbos, the גר returned back home, back to his wife.she right away asked him what he had learned and what they can start to do to keep the holy Shabbos better in their house. He replied “ It’s all a little foggy to me right now but the one thing I know for sure is why Jews don’t drive on Shabbos!!!”

There was once a mensch who identified as the Masiah- משיח. Oy nebach! Anyways this went on for years, if he met someone and they asked him for his name he replied I’m the Masiah!

B”h finally one day he stopped identifying as the Masiah. The Roov of the town was so happy when he found out that he decided he would now go to visit this non Masiah mench. The Roov met this man and asked “Whut happened? Whut changed your mind?” The man replied “I realized that I wasn’t the Masiah.” The Roov said “,א ברוך השם- Ah, Thank God.” The Man replied “Your welcome!”