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yekke2,
A once in a lifetime experience – here it depends what you find more exhilirating – the thrill of experience, or the thrill of trying to capture it.
Exactly!
DaasYochid,
Gam ki eilech b’gei tzalmaves
I hope the kalla has a good sense of humor if BigGolem goes with this one…
Joseph,
C’mon, Avram. You know you needn’t worry that no one is going to take pictures of a huge celestial event.
That’s because I know that there are many people out there who don’t have your attitude.
If all you need is to insure the event is documented in photography or that you have high res copies of said photographs, you can rely on others without worrying everyone’s going to rely on others or that no one’s going to take terrific pictures.
My guess is that documentation of the event is not what is motivating our friend the Wolf. If you took your family on a road trip and later wanted to make a photo book of the experience, would you just Google a bunch of stock photographs of the places that you visited and send them over to Snapfish?
RebYidd23,
1. If I didn’t know which neighbor, I would judge all of them and hate them forever.
Well, they all hate you forever already because you disturbed them with the shrieking, so they probably don’t care what you think at this point.
2. Different people have different definitions of “shrieking”. It is normal behavior for babies, for example, but I never call the cops on my neighbor who has three screaming babies.
Most people are smart enough to distinguish benign sounds from frightening ones, despite the fact that language can be inexact. If someone says, “I ran inside and locked the door because I heard a growl”, I’m not going to retort, “well maybe it was your stomach growling!” You’re alive today because your ancestors somehow avoided getting eaten by lions.
3. He can just ask the neighbor if he is being abused.
You’d first have to determine which neighbor made the shrieks (assuming they survived).
Joseph,
And you needn’t worry that if you don’t take the pictures no one will.
Note that in my post I wrote, “if everybody had this attitude…”
Would you ask a painter why he’s painting a pastoral scene, since there are thousands of pastoral paintings already?
Lilmod Ulelamaid,
How is this different from a playground rumor?
Do you not see the difference between hearing talk on the playground and personally witnessing a potentially dangerous event?
Syag Lchochma,
My kids used to insist I video or take pictures of certain events in their lives and I always ended up feeling like I missed out. Viewing things through a lens is not the same a being there.
I completely agree, even though I (and the kids) later appreciate having the pictures or video. The difference here in my opinion is that a photographer may view such an event as a good opportunity to take photos. So, if someone is going to South Carolina to witness the eclipse with their own eyes, then a camera might be in the way. But if someone is going to South Carolina to take photos of the eclipse, then to not have the camera would cause him to feel like he missed out. And who cares if thousands of others are doing the same?
DaasYochid,
BTW, if some jerk decides to still pretend you’re invisible (for example, by asking who we’re talking to), just ignore him.
Huh? Did someone ask that in this thread?
🙂
yekke2,
Truth hasn’t stopped anyone arguing in the past.
There’s true, and then there’s GoqTrue™
Joseph,
why not just enjoy direct viewing of the special moment without the distraction of shooting pictures, and download high resolution photographs afterwards of the same darkened sun?
Why do you care how other people choose to enjoy a special moment?
Joseph,
What’s the benefit of taking pictures of your own when there will be thousands of pictures available of the eclipse that will, essentially, be no different than yours?
If everybody had this attitude, then there would be no pictures.
TheGoq,
Thanks all I would like to think its because my posts are not controversial enough to merit response
Or it could be that what you write is frequently true to the point that nobody can argue.
ubiquitin,
The advantage is for these non-emergency visits colds, other minor infections like UTI’s, sprained joints etc, the wait is considerably shorter.
I agree. The flip side of this is that while urgent care clinics are set up to quickly get you out the door with treatments for routine things like ear infections, sinus infections, minor injuries, etc., they are not a replacement for comprehensive medical care. They may not be the best destination for symptoms that are a bit more out of the box, or chronic.
yekke2,
I didn’t read the question that way. To me, he was asking whether there would be any scenarios today which would constitute Mesirah, not whether she believes the Torah came down including a parshah of Mesirah.
That’s a nice spin on the question, but I don’t agree. Here’s why: the question was ridiculous. Not even those who may hold that mesira is “not an issue” in the medina shel chessed would “immediately” call the cops based on a playground rumor. No, the question was meant to be insulting, albeit to dan l’kaf zechus, perhaps unconsciously so.
DaMoshe,
The Steipler zt”l said not to make a brachah, as the Gemara says an eclipse is a siman ra.
Fascinating – why then do we make a bracha on an earthquake, or a rainbow?
akuperma,
They are not a serious threat.
Say that to the fact of any Jew who has been the victim of an anti-Semitic attack. And yes, anti-Semites dwell on the far left as well as the far right. Doesn’t mean white supremacists are not a threat.
They should be seen as similar to the “flat earth” society.
Maybe if flat-earthers were demonstrating with torches with chants of expulsion to the round-earthers.
The American right has long been well intgegratged with non-white and Jews. In the southern states, one finds African Americans being elected with support from the “old stock” (meaning descendants of the Civil War losers) whites. The conservative Christian groups are ethnically and racially integrated.
This is so head-scratchingly wrong that I wonder if you have ever been to the South before.
And if you want to say that you did the same to Joseph, you did not. You asked him to define his own boundary of the gray area. You did not provide him a ridiculous example, like:
Do you believe that there is an issue of not standing by while your neighbor’s blood is shed? When do you think that issue would apply? If I’m in the neighborhood playground and I see Mr X chasing his wife with a kitchen knife screaming, “I will kill you!”, do you think I should immediately call the cops?
mw13,
So, I decided to try asking some specific questions about the gray zones, and about where each of the sides would draw their respective lines.
That’s not at all what you did. You asked a specific question that was way outside of the gray zone, implicitly implying that Syag Lchochma thought it was a gray zone, which had the effect of suggesting that she does not care about halacha.
Suppose there was a thread about chalav stam, and you were arguing that it was acceptable to use chalav stam in some situations. And then I asked you:
Do you believe that there is an issue of kashrus? When do you think that issue would apply? If I’m in a small town at lunchtime and there’s a McDonalds across the street, do you think I should go in there and order a cheeseburger?
Is that a serious question I asked to try and tease out the boundaries of the gray area, or is that me being condescending?
Health,
Your comprehension is failing you – as you get older!
I was then going back to the OP.Sorry, misunderstanding bad writing is not the reader’s fault. If you’re changing subjects, you should state it explicitly. Otherwise, the logical interpretation is that you are still addressing the same subject.
Ugh, I’m having a hard time living up to the expectations of the frum haters. I can’t both wear old, tattered, misfitting clothing, and sport a gaudy suit while parking my Lexus to pay for groceries with by EBT card at the same time.
Gadolhadorah,
Curiosity’s take is correct. You wrote “limited social skills”, which is 100% a value statement, and a disparaging one at that, and then tried to walk it back as cultural differences. No can do.
BTW, the vast majority of inappropriate remarks made in professional workplaces come from people who were educated in public schools and went to co-ed universities. To pass off boorish behavior as somehow a result of a frum upbringing is not only a cheap shot, but wrong.
Gadolhadorah,
Even at home, its best to avoid such commentary since its so easy to frame the comments in a way that is misunderstood or makes the recipient feel uncomfortable.
This is an absolutely terrible piece of marriage advice. It is absolutely essential for each spouse to communicate that the other is dear, cherished, respected, and yes, physically attractive. And understanding is achieved by a miraculous process known as listening and communicating.
dovrosenbaum,
I think society was better in those days. The 60s ruined this country. The only good I see coming out of the civil rights movement was provisions for religious observance in hiring.
Are you conflating the civil rights movement with all of the social upheavals that occurred in the 1960s, or do you yearn for Jim Crow laws?
dovrosenbaum,
There’s a deep attitude in society that’s entering our communities that men are incompetent, men are stupid
Yes, this is true, and very dangerous, for men, women, and children.
It’s ok to degrade men in ways that society would never tolerate with the treatment of women.
That’s a ridiculous statement. You just don’t notice the degradation of women in “society”.
Men are being decimated by this society, and we can thank women’s lib.
Not sure you were intending to use the word decimated here… and I don’t think you can wrap this neatly in a box and blame women’s lib.
They’re stuck in the 50s, and that’s a great thing.
The stereotypical 1950s culture you yearn for, despite being considered “traditional” in ignorant 2017, was actually not traditional at all. Men were not traditionally cut off from their wives and children for long stretches of each day due to long commutes to work; frequently leaving before their kids woke up, and coming home close to bedtime. This disconnect between men and their families, which expanded in the 1950s along with the huge migration to the suburbs, created the underpinning conditions that led to the stereotype of the clueless father. No, the healthy traditional lifestyle is where men worked close to home, and the kids could easily move about between mother and father, learning from and interacting with both. Men could step in and help in the house and women could help their husbands in the field or store when needed.
They learn to the point and don’t waste their time with mental gymnastics in the kollelim.
Calling Torah learning “mental gymnastics” is insulting.
My un-PC comment of the day: I loved Windows 10 for the first month or two that I used it, but now, not so much. Chrome OS will make America great again 🙂
Joseph,
Avram, other than the fact that we are all Yidden here subject to Halacha, why else did the Rov tell him *not* to report this to any authorities?
Because the Rav may have knowledge of the neighbor’s situation that our OP did not.
Joseph,
I called an Rx into your pharmacy for a course of chill pills for you. Each capsule contains 20mg of the active ingredient, chilloutophen. Please take 1 capsule per day before logging into the CR. Avoid dairy and alcoholic beverages for 1 hour prior to and 2 hours after taking the medication.
Please call the office to schedule a follow-up in 2 weeks.
DaasYochid,
Calling cops on frum neighbor
This thread is about a beighbor, so I don’t see how that one is relevant. Oh, wait.
Joseph,
You liberals are missing the fact that the OP *already asked his Rov* and his Rov said **don’t be a Moser**.
Wait, when did this become a “liberal” issue?
Also, where did the rav say anything about mesira? If you’re going to call out posters who make assumptions without knowing all of the facts, you should first check to make sure you are not doing the same.
The little I know,
Our society of today is afflicted with a serious disease that cannot be cured, only eradicated.
For instance, SJW’s are obsessed with this stuff. Whites are automatically considered racist, and crimes against them are justified. Does that sound acceptable? Well, the MSM would have you believing that. Yes, Google used this approach to fire an employee. Democrats tout this garbage all the time. No, it will not mellow and become less virulent over time. It will gain strength like a hurricane, and do at least as much damage.
You do a good job proving your point about declining civility and castigating people with different opinions from you by modeling the behavior yourself.
CTLAWYER,
We’ve always kept cleaning chemicals and bug chemicals, etc under lock and key.
It’s still an element of babyproofing, even if the original intent was senile-relative/non-English-speaking-help-proofing. I’m sure once you had young children in the house, their safety became part of the calculus for keeping those items away, despite the boundary setting and supervision.
Our kitchens are locked because we live in small town New England.
Yet your lead-off reason for locking the kitchen given above was “so no child…”, so obviously children were part of the equation here too, not just your non-Jewish houseguests.
Why do you find it problematic that someone might consider the safety measures you have taken in your home to be considered babyproofing?
But what if the clothing is newly bought?
mw13,
I had this thought that America was more civil when everyone smoked.
1. Correlation does not imply causation
2. The author likely is not Jewish, or black. America doesn’t feel so civil if you have to drink from a separate water fountain, or when facing a quota (avoid having too many Jews in this college!)Syag Lchochma,
As I understood it he said that he didn’t baby proof, then he said that he had to make some changes because of changes in the building codes which are similar to what you would do for baby proofing.
Agreed on the outlets – he did mention that he upgraded his electrical in 2017. But he also mentioned locking the kitchen and keeping chemicals and breakables up (albeit the latter for his dogs). Other than gates on the stairs, that’s all we have done to babyproof our home. And yet we also set boundaries and supervise closely. I don’t see it as an either-or.
CTLAWYER,
We never ‘babyproofed’ our home.
But then you go on to describe replacing outlets with child safe ones, keeping the kitchen locked, keeping chemicals in locked cabinets, and keep breakables out of reach. Most people would call that babyproofing.
Joseph,
But (correctly) using that criteria you should also be frustrated and disappointed that your date wasn’t the right person for you even if he/she was a very nice refined Yid.
Two points:
1. There is a much higher potential for a very nice refined Yid to be the right person. A good marriage is based more on a constant, conscious choice to commit oneself to Hashem and his/her spouse than checking off every random box on a list, or some hocus pocus concept of “besheret”.
2. Even if the nice refined Yid was definitely not the right person, despite the frustration and disappointment, there is more hope for the next date than if the previous date was a dud.
Joseph,
The best answer to your OP is this golden nugget from Shloime above:
neither her nor you are there for the dinner; you are meeting hoping that it can work
Fundamentally it’s not about the dinner, the activity, the walk to the door, etc. It’s about finding a spouse. So it’s frustrating and disappointing to find a louse.
Joseph,
why would you have wanted him to not say no if he truly was a boor who was a bore smelling like a boar?
I can’t speak for Nechomah, but probably because it added insult to injury.
WinnieThePooh,
Those sound like horrible experiences, but B”H they revealed their characters on the first dates, rather than fooling you with a show.
Or who pretend not to know this.
Lightbrite,
When are your kids old enough for you to un-babyproof your home?
Depends on the family. By age 3, many toddlers can open baby gates themselves and can pull chairs over to access items on shelves, and babyproofing gives way to chinuch. But then there may be younger siblings, and eventually iy”H grandchildren.
BTW, sharp edges can be a bane for adults too, not just children!
It’s the same principle as your point in the thread you opened about graphic images on YWN. The fear and tension generated by such birth horror stories outweighs any benefit of knowing all those details.
If, for example, you are using Chrome, and have the browser set to “continue where I left off” when launched, then your cookies get stored on your hard drive so that Chrome can set everything up the way it was when you last closed the browser. This may happen even if you have a setting to delete cookies when closing the browser.
Joseph,
what’s so geferlech if instead of him driving she drives or if she supplies the car or they take an Uber or car service? Is that really the end of the world?
Certainly not, but the polite thing for him to do is to inform his date in advance.
And how do you know Meno was responding to you, and not to dovrosenbaum?
Joseph,
Read the OP again. I’m not complaining whatsoever.
Then your entire first paragraph is superfluous.
Gadolhadorah,
Cool! I did not know that. Shabbos minyan?
dovrosenbaum,
It’s like most other things in life. Men get the short end of the stick.
Ugh, more whining. Sorry you have to wake up early to say shelo asani isha, had to learn Torah on Sundays in high school, or whatever else makes you feel aggrieved.
The girl sits there, orders food and doesn’t pay,
If this really bothers you, then let her know that she’ll need to pay for her food. Nobody’s forcing you to pay for anything.
and generally could care less about the guy; she cares about his looks, his status or parnassa, etc.
Seems like you couldn’t care less about “the gal” either. You might get better results from your dating if you didn’t start out hating her guts because she’s female.
There’s a Kensington in Maryland too, but there’s no frum community in it.
Shopping613,
Actually there’s another point about texting, that most people are actually addicted to it. I’m no exaggerating.
This is very true, and is part of the reason that smartphones have had such a large cultural impact. It’s good to be aware of this influence.