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Hello Seahorse,
I agree, and thank you for what you said 🙂 I wish you all the luck in finding the right one who embodies the wonderful qualities that mean so much to you!
Thank you for the info and suggestions zahavasdad! I hope you are having a joyful Sukkos 🙂
Thank you for the info shein! I am really looking forward to being in my first one; so far I have just seen lots of pictures (albeit lovely ones!).
Hello zahavasdad,
Would you say that more people in big cities like New York go to communal sukkas due to space restrictions?
Hello haifagirl and Wisey,
My age is not the problem. It is medical.
Thank you as always, HaLeiVi, for boiling down the issues to its essentials for me! I especially appreciate the concept of the Sukkah being a metaphor for an anteroom to the world to come — it inspires a lot of anticipation and hopefulness in me. I hope that you have a very joyous Sukkos! (I hope that that is an appropriate wish for Sukkos — I am not sure, but my reading made me think that it is a happy occasion, so I thought that wish would be okay?).
Hello Seahorse,
What an excellent question! As a 35 year old woman who has never been married, I have to say that I would look for a kindness, gentleness, and compassion in a mate — someone who has a great love of animals and children. Since I most likely can’t have children, I would very much like to find a life partner who would be interested in adopting. I feel rather “old,” so these criteria may not be what many women are looking for. But nonetheless, these traits mean a great deal to me!
Hello WIY,
I hope that you have a lovely Sukkos (I am not sure of the appropriate Hebrew expression, I am sorry!).
I wanted to let you know, in response to this question and from my various dealings as a child advocate attorney, it is an excellent question and one which a person can’t be too careful about — in Philadelphia, our agency has had to pursue such cases legally where children in the car overheated or, in one tragic case involving a grandparent with his grandchild, the child died. All it takes is one such highly publicized case for government agencies to begin going after these situations.
It is in some ways a catch-22, I think: leave the windows up and doors locked, there is less chance of someone breaking in and G-d forbid a kidnapping, but more chance of overheating; leave the windows down, there is less chance of overheating but more chance of the kidnapping, G-d forbid.
I would have to say, given my experience with these prosecutions, to play it safe, the person should seriously consider taking the children with him/her, to avoid any chance of prosecution, G-d forbid, for endangering the welfare of a child, due to heat (windows up) or some version of neglect (windows down so that malfeasants could kidnap the children).
Hello Coffee Room,
I read a story of a very inspiring Sukkah yesterday that I thought I would share with you!
It would seem that in the Berkshires, there is this 100+ year old farm, the Gould farm (?), that has been used as a place where people with mental health concerns may go for a few months to live, work, and develop life skills to help them in their rehabilitation. Some people there built a very earthy Sukkah, composed of such things as animal corn, as a communal effort. I read the story in The Jewish Week and thought it was inspiring that people in the midst of such adversity could build this beautiful shelter! Maybe the story will warm your hearts as well.
The story made me think about the different wonderful harvests we have as human beings…of course, we have our seasonal harvest with it’s glorious pumpkins, apples, corn, and all kinds of crops. It is magnificent to celebrate these gifts of G-d at this time of year. It is also so profound and moving to me to think about spiritual harvests of the heart and soul, like the one that generated this Sukkah in the Bershires…these fruits have a way of letting us wrap each other in the shelter of love and companionship when we may feel most alone, like these people trying to rebuild their lives on Gould’s farm.
I hope that your Sukkos is a joyous celebration!
Hello abba_murray_bar_popa and akuperma,
Abba_murray_bar_popa, a small gene segment, rather than a whole gene, can be analyzed to link various Jewish populations, so that it can be determined how many generations ago two people had a common ancestor. This phenomenon of “coalescence” helps geneticists map Jewish population movement in the Diaspora and helps scientists determine roughly at what point in history various genetically inherited illnesses came into the gene pool, among other things. Many genetic fragments, rather than just one gene, are at play. The importance of this genetic research and the linkage of “Jewish” genes for purposes of developing targeted treatments for diseases that particularly effect Jews are discussed at length throughout the new publication Legacy: A Genetic History of the Jewish People, by Dr. Harry Ostrer (please see my previous posts in this thread for more publication information).
Akuperma, regarding female Jewish conversions, genetic research has determined that all Jewish subpopulations, except for those located in India and Ethiopia, have mitochondrial (i.e., maternal) genomes that originated from the Middle East. See Ostrer’s Legacy, page 111. Specifically, among Ashkenaz, four mitochondrial genomes (i.e., haplogroups) account for 70% of all Ashkenaz — only four founder females for the group. See Legacy, page 109. A few of these haplogroups are of Middle Eastern origin, and a few are of European origin — these findings are similar to those found among Ashkenazi male founders. See Legacy, page 109. Thus, the current genetic research does not support the idea that more females than males, at least among Ashkenaz, were converts.
Hello Charles Short,
The statistic of 95% of non-Cohen Jews being children of converts is not born out by current genetic research. Please see my previous posts in this thread, as well as the 2012 book by Dr. Harry Ostrer, entitled Legacy: A Genetic History of the Jewish People.
thank you SiDi, especially regarding your well wishes for my mother’s recovery — she is in her last week of chemotherapy treatment now! Your encouragement has really helped me continue forward 🙂
Hello Yichusdik and WIY,
Thank you for your beautiful metaphors Yichusdik and your website leads WIY!
Yichusdik, what you wrote is poetic and reminds me of a book I’m reading right now — The Sabbath by Abraham Joshua Heschel.
WIY, your questions are never stupid!! You may safely assume that a newbie like me is not familiar with even the most basic sources, so please please suggest away! I will check these sites out.
Having read over the various old Sukkos threads, I have a question that maybe someone in the CR can answer…where I live in the suburbs and country, safety in the Sukkah is not an issue. I am curious though, for those in a major metropolitan area like New York City, is anyone able to sleep in the Sukkah overnight? If so, how do people deal with safety threats posed by potential malfeasants in the city?
Hello Coffee Room,
Although this is an old thread, I am very grateful to be able to read your thoughts on this particular holiday, as it may be the one that I know and understand the least about. Does anyone else have any Sukkos thoughts or metaphors that you found helpful in gaining a broad perspective on this holiday? Thank you!
Hello SiDi,
I will miss your cheerful, welcoming, and funny posts in the Coffee Room! I wish you the best of luck in your travels and adventures, and I hope that it will not be long before we re-welcome you to the CR 🙂
Hello Coffee Room,
I am not a gamer and I never have been. But might we try to be kind to each other, today of all days, and not call each other names directly or indirectly? I wish the best for everyone here!
May everyone be sealed in the book of life!
That is very thought-provoking, as always, BaalHabooze — thank you!
Yes, I second that! Thank you mods for your dedication. I am not sure about the Hebrew expression, so I wish that you all will be sealed in the book of life (I hope this is correct)!
Mommamia22, how sad! I wish with all my heart that these poor creatures were treated humanely so as to minimize their suffering.
Hello radiant glow,
Of the four communities that you are considering, I have experience living in the Philadelphia PA area. The cost of living for Philadelphia itself is significantly lower than for many other major US cities. I wasn’t sure if you were thinking of living within the city itself, or rather the suburbs referred to as the “Main Line,” which has a thriving Orthodox community (but can be quite expensive).
Having worked as a child advocate attorney for ten years in Philadelphia, I can tell you that it is in general a very violent and dangerous city, although the sections that you may be interested in (e.g., Old City, Center City) are relatively very safe, historic, and pleasant.
If you are considering the Main Line suburbs of Philadelphia, Bryn Mawr has the excellent Akiba Academy, now known as Jack M. Barrack Hebrew Academy. I frequently see many Orthodox families in this general vicinity, walking with ease to shul and other areas (shopping, public transportation, etc.). This location is very convenient and accessible by walking to anything you may need.
In the interest of full disclosure, I have to admit that I was born in Bryn Mawr and lived the first few years of my life in nearby Narberth, and I am extremely partial to this area! It is very safe and has incredible cultural opportunities. The Jewish community (of all denominations) is very large in the Main Line. Although you are interested in a religious school, it may interest you that the Lower Merion School District there is the absolute best in the state, due to the resources available in the Main Line. This fact may have some bearing on the special education services that are available, even for children in private school.
If you can give me an idea of where in the Philadelphia area you are looking at, I can give you more specific information.
I wish you the best of luck in finding the right fit in terms of communities for your family, and with your move!
Hello yehudayona and all,
I wanted to mention that the book takes great pains to emphasize that what the author is talking about are genetic indications of Jewishness and various smaller groups within the larger whole (e.g., Levites and Cohanim). Dr. Ostrer has concerns that the genetic findings could potentially be used to exclude people from various Jewish groups when these people have always understood from family history and in Halachic terms that they were Jews and/or members of certain smaller Jewish populations. He is emphatic that genetics should not replace Halachic determinations. His great passion for genetics of the Jewish people seems to be about preventing suffering from certain illnesses and conditions that have been and continue to be linked with various genes.
Hello yytz,
I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to suggest that you did! What you mentioned in the last sentence about the Khazar descent is actually exactly what some of the research in this book debunks, as you say. That is what I was trying to convey. This book was a truly fascinating read!
Hello Aaron Chaim,
Thank you for posting that absolutely beautiful Yom Kippur thought by Rabbi Katz…what a fabulous perspective to keep in mind!
Hello,
Many posters on this thread may be very interested in the new book Legacy: A Genetic History of the Jewish People, by Harry Ostrer (Oxford, May 2012).
According to genetic testing that has been done, Levites and Cohanim each represent approximately 4% of Ashkenazi Jewish males (the percent of Levites is somewhat lower among Sephardic Jewish males). This statistic comes from page 100 of this book and references a 1999 publication — Bradman, Thomas, and Goldstein’s The Genetic Origins of Old Testament Priests, found in Population Specific Polymorphisms, pages 31-44 (Cambridge University Press).
Legacy contains results of myriad genetic testing studies done up through 2011, and Dr. Ostrer has been involved in much of the research — he is Director of Genetic and Genomic Testing at Montefiore Medical Center and Professor of Pathology and Genetics at Albert Einstein College of Medicine. The research that he discusses in Legacy goes into much depth regarding many of the issues debated in this thread, especially the idea that many Jews (in particular, Ashkenazim) have Jewish heritage primarily as a result of conversions of local populations in the distant past — an idea that is not born out by the research results covered in this book.
I found the book fascinating and could hardly put it down!
Thank you BaalHabooze for that perspective of boundless possibilities…it is inspiring to think about all of the many wonderful mitzvos we can do, given the many advantages we have. It makes such a difference when I try to face the day with optimism!
Hello sign teach,
That is definitely a challenge! I am not sure how contemporary you are looking for, but if you can give me a ballpark, I may have some better suggestions than the ones I have thought of first (see below).
I think that perhaps many of the novels or short stories of Willa Cather may be in the vicinity of your criteria. Her work is now approximately a hundred years old though, as it comes from the first two decades of the 1900s. She often writes about girls and women growing up in the Midwestern parts of the United States at approximately that same time, and how they overcame numerous adversities to succeed in many facets of life. Her writing, while often containing positive, uplifting overarching themes, still includes trials, tribulations, and adversity along the way. Her use of language is beautiful. Perhaps this literature is too dated for your purposes though. Nonetheless, I remember finding many of her stories inspiring when I was an English major — I ended up reading everything that she had ever published or which was published posthumously, which took me those four years and then my next three in law school!
Of even earlier vintage, the novels of Jane Austen (with story lines from 18th century England) are amazing comedies of manners for their time periods and have much wit even today. Pride and Prejudice is my personal favorite. To be clear, Austen’s work does involve romance in the sense that various middle to upper class
English ladies are in search of eligible gentlemen as husbands, with all of the attendant social and socioeconomic problems that occur along the way (e.g., issues of nobility, inheritance, dowries, uncouth family members, etc.). However, the novels reflect the morals and mores of the times, such that the men and women are almost always interacting in the presence of their families and communities at approved social events, such as balls, country dinners, weddings, etc. Nonetheless, if Cather’s work is too remote in time for your purposes, Austen’s certainly is.
The previous posters have suggested many other excellent works (Hawthorne’s The Scarlet Letter, etc.) that may likewise not be as contemporary as you are seeking.
I am not sure either, when you specify “no romance” and “no violence,” if you are seeking literature that does not even allude indirectly to either of these things. For example, The Scarlet Letter alludes frequently to the main character Hester Prynne’s sin of adultery (that is why she is made to wear the scarlet “A” at all times in her community), but Hester committed this act much prior to the events of the book; indeed, the book focuses on the various negative repercussions of her sin. I am not sure if this storyline would constitute “romance” for your purposes. Perhaps, despite the fact that adultery is a topic of this book, the treatment of the adultery (e.g., as a sin with negative consequences that the sinner must endure) would make this classic of American English literature an acceptable choice in your school environment. Even should the topic be acceptable, this novel arguably falls very easily into that class of “bleak” literature from which you are attempting to stay away.
I would be happy to brainstorm about more specific and appropriate choices if you suggest how contemporary you would like the English literature to be, and how broadly “no romance” and “no violence” should be construed (i.e., would romance as I described in a Jane Austen novel be prohibitive).
I have Internet where Iam so I can still visit the Coffee Room after all when I am away!
Popa, having known people whose cats were poisoned to death, I know that it is a very painful, excruciating death. It is not kind to do this to any animal.
Hello uneeq,
I felt very sad when I read your post. I have spent years trying to help homeless pets by working at shelters or taking them into my own home. I would respectfully ask you to consider, before you post something like you did above, that at least some posters here find value in the lives of these animals and consider them to be beautiful creatures of G-d’s. Thank you.
BaalHabooze, I think your idea is great — your words really convey a deep love and joy in children, like seeing things through their eyes with freshness and wonder! For the OP with that wide age range of children, I can only imagine how tricky it is to come up with the various things that will catch the interest of all.
tzaddiq, that was so cool what you said about a blue moon! I had only ever thought that it was an expression, never an actual astronomical phenomenon.
Hello shein,
A criminal judge, Jewish or otherwise, in the U.S. court system can impose a penalty under U.S. law on a defendant, Jewish or otherwise, who has been found guilty whether or not that particular penalty is also warranted under halacha. It is the U.S. judge’s legal right, job, and duty to impose this penalty when a defendant properly under the court’s jurisdiction is before the court for sentencing, after that defendant was tried according to the laws of the land for a crime recognized by the criminal code in the relevant jurisdiction.
As an attorney here in the U.S., I can only speak for how things work here. What country do you live in, or what country are you talking about, when you say that the judge has no right to penalize a Jew with a penalty unwarranted under Halacha?
Hello The Rashbak! It is good to meet you 🙂