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Medically it is not recommended.
Old acceptable practices have obviously been improved on most probably because the outcome or long term outcome of those old practices were not viable. Many old and proven practices led to other complications so new treatments replaced old ones. Knowledge is power, and the knowledge the medical field gains over the years and through trial and error with other patients is what gives them the knowledge to make more informed decisions on common practices for current situations.
Dr. Adler might have saved his legs for the time being, but no one knows what further complications this save will cause.
Smoking is a selfish and disgusting habit.
What exactly is the question or the problem?
Yes, it was a horrible experience.
WE are mommy & Tatty, Bobby & Zeidy
It is interesting that this question is even asked. A Kohain, is a Kohain what would age have to do with it.
If you are looking for a get rich quick scheme go back to sleep and keep dreaming.
If you are looking for some pocket money or to start saving up some money. There are many things you can do if you look for it, use your imagination or look around your own neighborhood.
Ofcourse, most men do not understand until you strap on a baby bump of 30 lbs on them and have them walk around that way for a week. Then when they complain that their back hurts, it is hard to carry so much weight up front that is not distributed evenly, their legs hurt, they don’t feel balanced, they can’t see their feet when they walk, down the steps or try to lift something off the floor, etc, etc, etc, only then do they get an inkling of what women go through. Of course they are missing the experience of getting punched from the inside out, just when you finally fall asleep.
If they try this “shtick” of rental agreement to keep you from making a copy, then I would boycott any music from this producer.
Kapusta, good explanation.
When I was young I called him “daddy” like all the other american kids. When I was in HS we started calling him Tatty because we started listening more closely to what my mother was saying and she wasn’t saying “daddy” she was saying “tatty” or more so “de tatta hut gezugt”. So we got smarter in our older years. Then of course he became “Zeidy” which he preferred above all else 🙂
popcorn, I agree with the concept however if the RAV says NO, that is his answer and that is what he has to go by. If that is the psak halachah we can’t go by what our own heart tells us because there is a higher authority. My heart tells me the same, I am not “making” him drive on Shabbos, he will drive regardless of my request and he will eat a treif meal on top of eat. Maybe my question should be, should I invite this guy to my house Friday night so he can have a kosher Shabbos meal instead of him driving to McDonalds and have a treif meal? I wonder what the answer would be?
apushatayid, when I was a kid I was taught to ALWAYS think about getting up and giving someone else my seat and I taught that to my kids as well.
We were in La Vista in ’87. I walked into the lobby for an event and an elderly lady came up to me and pointed to my then 9 year old son and said “is that your child?” I got nervous for a second thinking “oh my what could he have done?” and answered in the affirmative. She said “a brocha oif zan kupf, you did a good job! He saw me walking into the room and ran to the other room to carry a chair in for me! Even the teens didn’t think of that!” I smiled and said, “Yes of course, that is what he learned from us and from my parents.”
So if my 9 year old learned that, I could expect that girls of that age and older 20 years ago could have done at least stood up.
It means you better have more than one credit card if you want to keep up with her lifestyle. Oh I meant you better have more than one credit card and be prepared to pay the bills. Yeah, thats what I meant.
Why judge what other people do? If you like it follow the trend if you don’t then don’t follow. If it means something to someone else then let it alone. If it feels wrong to you, then look away.
I’ve seen the State of Hysteria many times? Anyone else been there? 😉
Keep to “pareve” subjects. Travel, sports, families, friends, hobbies, books, food, favorite games, etc. Stay away from halachic discussions and deep inyanim. You are not chavrusas.
why do you ask the question? Do you go to movies? Do you want to go? Are you asking to question why others go?
Shwekey does not have the RIGHT to say you are renting a CD if he prices it the same as a purchase. Does he reimburse part of your money if you choose to return it after you listen to it? NO? Then it is not a rental if it is the same price as a purchase.
This was discussed many times by many poskim. If you buy it, it belongs to you and you have the right to make another copy for yourself and use it for yourself. You don’t have a right to make a copy for your spouse and children. You can lend them your copy while you don’t use it, or they can listen to it on your computer, ipod, cd player. If you buy a copy of microsoft office, they allow you to put it on your desktop and on your laptop which are both registered to you. However, they don’t allow you to put in on YOUR computer and on someone else’s computer, that is breaking their copyright rules. Your wife can use your computer and your copy of office while using your computer and they can’t stop her nor do they have a right to stop her as long as she is using your computer.
Observanteen everything is not “phsat” some things need mephorshim.
s2021, I love that idea! Super cool! TBL that’s sounds great too, make circle time the exciting part of the day, which makes “learning” the most exciting part of the day”. Maybe give them each a “learning cap or crown” that you hand out on when they are all sitting in their seats….make sure we are all sitting nicely in our seats so our special learning caps don’t tip over and fall off”. And maybe you can add stickers to the learning caps at the end of each session for the children that sat nicely through circle time. Let them choose the sticker and let them put it on their cap. Maybe they can each wear their caps at graduation or at a recital.
s2021, I love that idea! Super cool!
Book knowledge is worth every penny but common sense is priceless it just can’t be bought!
-my mom a”h-
RB, what more could she have done beside stand there with her belly in their face. You get that if she is standing and they are sitting her belly is literally in their face!
Popcorn, suggestions are given because the OP’s Rav specifically told him that HE can’t invite the friend for Shabbos, so the only way for the friend to experience a Shabbos was for him to set him up with someone else or for the OP to go against his RAV.
Kol Hakovod to you and your family, but you are not the one that asked for help. So what do YOU suggest the OP do?
Smartcookie, I’m with you, I’ll take whatever I can get! I have B”H eineklech from my own biological kids and then some from my extended family of the at-risk kids that b”h made it through their teenage years. So Hashem has blessed me with many and the numbers keep growing.
Do you have an assistant? Are YOU staying calm or are you getting nervous and are the kids picking up on that? What is your routine, how do you start the circle? Who puts the chairs in the circle you or the kids? Are they coming from free play? Do they put the toys away first? How do you get them to put the toys away?
Maybe have everyone take a seat at the table and and shut the lights and turn on the tape for one song. Take turns having someone choose which song to play, maybe the child who behaved the best during circle time or a child that was chosen at circle time the day before. When the song is over turn on the lights and have everyone take their chairs and make the circle and then get started. At the end of circle time tell them how proud you are of them for sitting so nicely and being so eager to learn and pick the child who will choose the next days get ready for circle time song.
Sometimes routine is a key for children, they need to have the structure and they need to know what to expect.
Some women become very emotional, some are just nauseous all the time, some are just unpredictable all due to hormones. So for lack of a better terrm try to stay one step ahead rather than one step behind. Hopefully you know your wife well enough to know whether she wants attention or not. Some women need the hovering and some women DON”T want it. If she is a neat freak, be extra careful to stay in line and not make extra work for her, or better yet try to be vigilant and help clean so she won’t have to. If she gets sick from the smell of cooking, offer to help in the kitchen, get take out, ask your mother to cook and pick it up, do whatever it takes to address the issue.
Are you catching on yet? Don’t invite company over before checking with her and ask her “are you up for company?” don’t ask her “I really would like to have so and so over” that will make her feel guilty and she will do it for you whether she feels up to it or not. If you have other kids, help, help, help with them or get help for her especially with cleaning and laundry (lifting and bending is more difficult at this stage). Understand that it is more important for her to rest than for you to rest, so when Shabbos roles around be considerate of that and let her get a refreshing nap while YOU watch the other kids.
Always tell her how beautiful she looks, no matter how big she is getting, or how many pimples broke out on her face because she is going to be very critical about herself and her swollen ankles. And yes, remind her to put her feet up.
The more consideration you show her at this time in your marriage the more she will appreciate and respect you. S1, very nice of you to try and teach the young men these Shalom Bayis basics.
RB, you can’t speak during Megilah laining. You know that!
It is up to you as the teacher to set the rules for the class. You are not supposed to be bribing them for following the rules. What time are you doing your circle? Maybe you should change your schedule and do it earlier in the day or right after nap time when they are not restless. You need to adapt to the energy in the room and not try to get them to do something when their energy is not capable of complying. My grandchildren who are 4-5 are either in kindergarten or pre-1A and are very capable of following the rules. So maybe you need to understand the rhythm of the day. Snacks should be after circle time, circle time should be when they are calm and not try to calm them down for circle time. Free play should be after circle time so they get to expend built up energy. Don’t try to get them to sit still when they are hungry and need a boost. When are they most interested in sitting with you?
google it, google HASC concerts…????
That’s really a shame, he is a nice man and he tried so hard.
Health, Unfortunately, pregnant women have NO heter to not fast on Purim. IF a doctor tells them NOT to fast because it is detrimental to their health or the health of the baby then that’s fine. But rarely will an OB tell a frum woman they shouldn’t fast.
Canine, only WE individually know what our relationships are like with our parents and in-laws. So only we truly know what needs improvement and what WE each need to do to improve. Unfortunately, I do not have any parents left to be mkabed. The only things left for me to do is to honor their memories and be the best person I can be to make them proud of me. I always have in mind what they would think about what I do. I was raised well and taught well and I try not to veer from that. That is how I respect my parents.
My point exactly, depending who your speaking to, depending how they would react if they found out what you know, depending if halachacly or according to your Rav it is your place to say or not…..it all depends on the case. So some answers are “I don’t know them well enough” some answers may be “fine people, excellent boy or girl….” and some answers might be “its not shayach for you”. It all depends on “who, what, where, how” who they are, what they’re looking for, where they are holding hashkafa-wise, and how they would react and handle the information.
I don’t have a crystal ball, I am not clairvoyant, I don’t take on the responsibility, I am not playing G-d, I do the best I can and hope Hashem puts the right answers in my head. I don’t encourage a shidduch that I think will be problematic and I don’t discourage a shidduch that might work even though there were past issues if I don’t know who the people are and don’t know whether they can handle the information or not. Who am I to judge or decide that these people will be so shallow that they can’t deal with it? In addition, who am I to believe that I am so choshuv to be the one to disclose information that should be handled by a Rav or the person themselves? And what right do I have to spread L”H?
YUP, it is a fine line to walk and it is definitely a difficult balancing act. I wish everyone hatzlocha as they go through this nisayon and of course everyone hatzlocha in being zoche to make shidduchim.
yes
Its called “A Small Piece of Heaven”.
What makes you think that had she come 10 minutes earlier someone would have given her their seat or that there would have been an empty seat 10 minutes earlier?
HASC, Abie Rottenberg, Avrohom Fried
We don’t have to change the world. If one group starts, others will follow.
I am telling you he did he is in law school. So what would you do?
After 20 years the playing field has changed, there are new people mixed in with the old and you should feel comfortable no matter the crowd. BTW, the kids who were then seated will probably be the preggers this time around.
Smartcookie, it is a troubling question isn’t it. But what happened to him in Israel has nothing to do with who he is today, what kind of husband or father he would make. He made a huge mistake back then and it has no shaychus to today at all. Absolutely nothing. He made a mistake and he paid for it big time. He learned a huge lesson from it. How could revealing this information be helpful to anyone? Why should knowing this information change a girl’s mind about marrying or even dating him. It is not something he would ever do in his adult life, nothing he would ever revisit again. So how would divulging this information be helpful to anyone? This is something he would have to inform a girl after dating her for a while and she gets to know him. He would have to say to her “There is something I need to tell you. I made a really stupid mistake when I was a kid and I learned a huge lesson from it. I hope it won’t scare you off. I don’t want to hide anything about myself from you and I don’t want you to hear it from someone else, but it has nothing to do with who I am today it was just something so stupid that I did when I was a kid and I am so ashamed about”.
Maybe he should even introduce her to his Rav and tell her this in front of him so he can help him and answer any questions the girl has and then offer to answer any questions the girls parents might have about the incident.
So you see, every single situation has a twist and a turn. Nothing is simple and every single situation has to be handled with kid gloves on its own merit. If I were to tell a hyper person about this incident word could get out on this young man that he is a drug dealer and ruin his entire reputation. He could even get kicked out of Law school and ruin his chances of a good career. And for what reason because he made a mistake when he was 18? Now he is a man of 25 with a lot more seichel. Should he suffer for his mistakes for the rest of his life?
True but so was the pregnant woman, even more so a reason to give her a seat.
Again Goq, you can choose to be “right” but that won’t necessarily make you happy.
It is really a very sad state of affairs. The first one who gets engaged gets all the excitement and everyone is jumping out of their skin to do “everything” for her. By the time the last girl in the group gets engaged the rest of the chaburah have moved away, have a bunch of kids, haven’t spoken to the Kallah in years and so forth. It really isn’t fair or nice.
Maybe what you should do is make a bank account with two girls as secretary and treasurer and collect the same amount of money for the entire group, basically enough to cover ALL the girls if you were all getting married at the same time. And do this BEFORE anyone gets engaged. You all decide how much money each is putting into the account, you each choose who would be the one in charge of their parties and you each get to write up a wish list within the budget. The girl in charge of the first Kallah’s party can only spend the agreed upon amount and has to stick to the wish list. If the newlyweds move away, you can choose new “officers” and change the signatory at the bank. But the money will always be available at the bank when the next girl gets engaged. Even when the last girl gets engaged her kallah fund will still be there and available for her wish list.
New friends can buy things on their own or join the system to keep it going, but no one will feel used for having spent a fortune on other girls and not have anything to show for it when it is their turn. What do you think about that?
The pledge:….One Nation under G-d indivisible with liberty and justice for all…
Did that change?
TBT, is that what I did? Maybe that’s the way you read it, it is not the way I wrote it? I was just asking a question not ripping anyone apart.
Unfortunately, this is something we don’t teach anymore. When I was a child we were taught to stand when up for parents, for teachers/mechanchim, for your elders.
At a wedding, I stand when grandparents walk down to the chupah, you can count on your fingers how many others follow.
How difficult could it be to find a shomer shabbos family that lives in his vicinity or halfway between you and him to invite both of you for a Shabbos meal so you can both walk it? That would probably be the best way to handle it. Another way is to invite him to have lunch with you and make a point of making your brochos out loud and explain them to him. Invite him to a simcha you are attending and explain what is going on and why. Take him over to a yeshiva and show him how the kids learn from the youngest to the oldest. Explain to him why WE respect our women so much and the concept of modesty, etc.
Ofcourse, you are 100% right without a doubt and I am glad you brought up this story before Purim. Maybe it will have an impact on readers and they will remember it if the situation arises this year in shul and they will have the proper manners so as not to hurt someone who is in the situation you were in at that time. You are teaching a good lesson at an appropriate time. Kol Hakovod to you.
For those who do not understand this, I feel sorry for you. There is no excuse for NO ONE offering her a seat. And the issue is not WHY she came just in time, the issue is what middos were these young women taught if they did not have the common sense to do so?