Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
QAWS: This may answer your questions about why a shul would want to join up with the NCYI. http://www.youngisrael.org/
“The 9 days have started so what?”
There is a lecture from Rabbi Orlofsky on (Ithink this is proper spelling – I have it bookmarked and havent paid attention to the spelling in a while) torahanytime.com titled “the Bais Hamikdash is not here, who cares?” which attempts to help those who have the “so what” feeling and change it to a “oy vey”. It is worth the listen.
Art: chazal have already told us “kul haposel, posel es atzmo” which is essentially what you wrote in your last paragraph.
My Rav must have gone to the same Yeshiva as “Rabbi finkel here in Chicago” (I never heard of him, but he sounds like a wise man), he always tells us, there should be one yeardstick with which you measure everything you do. Would it be a nachas ruach to hashem.
Philosopher. You are making way to many assumptions and reading things into what I said leading you to ask all sorts of questions.
Let me clarify and it will be the last thing I say on this topic. If you are interested in reaching out to someone, (where I jumped into the discussion, it was specifically to reach out to an OTD teen) you should show some respect for them as a human being. If you do not, they will reject you, your overtures and the message you want to convey, no matter how true or persuasive your arguments to them might be.
EDITED
PERHAPS one of the reasons the costs for camp are higher is because of some of the expenses incurred by the camp. If these costs would go away, perhaps camp prices would come down. Do camps have to go on trips all the time? When I was in camp 25 years ago, the trip was going to camp (and in sleepaway camp the major trip, was to the local blwling alley). Concerts twice a summer? Specialty activities such as white water rafting and trips to water parks? (It is true that some camps now charge a “trip fee” on top of the camp fee)
Yes, there are certain fixed costs that exist no matter what, but there is a lot of extra fluff that can costs tens of thousands of dollars that can be done away with. BUT, would you want to send your kid to that nebby camp that doesnt do all those cool and exciting things? How could you face your kid? How could your kid face their friends. What, your camp didnt go on the three day excurion to Niagra Falls, what a horrible summer you must have had.
“apushetyid, Why is making decisions deserving of respect? This is a part of life.”
Yes, and if you want someone to take you seriously, you have to respect them as a human being, which means you acknowledge their right to make a decision. You dont have to respect the decisions that they made, (and you should let them know that as well – being two faced is worse than summarily dismissing someone out of hand).
“What about the Eirov Rav and Korach? In the midbar with the greatest leaders they made poor choices.”
How did Moshe Rabbeinu deal with them?
“Do we also need to “respect” Joe Stalin (or at least that he made decisions, if not the decisions made)? Or Bernie Madoff?”
Are you trying to reach out to them and help them? Stalin firmly believed in his cause as did Bernie Madoff (they shared the same cause by the way, get rich off everyone else, although their means were different). You are certainly entitled to try your approach when dealing with OTD people, I just have a hard time believing “shaigetz get back in the beis medrash, I dont care if you are angry at the whole world” is going to get anyone one iota closer to Hashem.
I heard it put this way. We have to respect the fact that they made a decision, we dont have to respect the decision that they made.
Re the husband: See the Mahrsha on the braisa in yoma where the story of Kimchis is brought. He tries to explain why they asked Kimchis what zechus SHE had, and did not think that perhaps the zechus was due to her husband (IE the father of the kohanim gedolim). He answers, they knew her husband and KNEW the zechus couldnt have come from him 🙂
It would seem her Midas Chassidus in this area helped as a zchus for her children, but not her husband (another answer he brings is that they were her children, but she had them with several husbands – IE she was an almanah and remarried).
Re the Ramchal. Are you speaking from experience?
re: Dave Hirsch source. See Siman Ayin Heh. I forget which sif kattan (but is the one which discusses saying krias shema in front of a woman whose hair is uncovered so is easy to find), but the Biur Halacha offers a synopsis of the shittos. He discusses the general chiyuv of a married woman to cover her hair and says that in her own home she does not have to keep it covered. I believe he says is a good idea that she do so so anyway, not because of hilchos tznius but because of hilchos brachos, so that her husband may say devorim shebikdusha (such as making a bracha, saying krias shema). He brings the Mogen Avraham who writes in the name of the Zohar (maybe its the AriZal) who says a woman should cover her hair even in the privacy of her own home, I am pretty sure it comes from Kimchis – but really dont remember). He brings, the Chasam Sofer was noheg to be machmir like the Magen Avraham, but most poskim are not. I am willing to bet that many who are arguing it is halacha to keep hair covered, ALA Kimchis, are chassidishe or otherwise of Hungarian extraction, while those who say it is a middas chassidusta are of Litvish extraction.
Regarding covering the knee. It depends on how one defines “Shok”. I was told (meaning, I have NO source to offer you other than the person who told me so please dont ask) the Mishna Berura says this means the area “below the knee”. Anything above the “shok” is an erva and below is not. Where the “shok” begins and ends is according, to my understanding, an area of disagreement among poskim. Top of knee, bottom of knee, somewhere in the middle, much further down the leg closer to ankle. My own Rav says that it is clear the MB says the “shok” means the knee and while he has no proof one way or the other, to define it as the lowest possible portion of the knee, he said that he knows others might feel it is a bit higher up. He also said that the MB agrees that if the minhag of women (and I believe it means jewish women)is to cover a certain part of the body, then in that city/town/area that part of the body is considered an erva. While not a conclusive proof to this concept, the Ben Ish Chai writes that “those areas of the arm which are normally uncovered, the kaf (palm) and etzbaos (fingers) are not an erva”. Living in Bagdhad where women probably dressed in the full Moslem levush (and jewish women probably had to dress the same way) it was the minhag for all other parts of the arm to be covered and he considred it an ervah.
Bottom line. Follow your family Rav.
Perhaps this requires the beginning of a new discussion thread,….
“The subject of bechirah is a difficult topic but klor certain stuff we don’t have bechira”
In what “stuff” dont we have bechira? How is it so klor? What sefer discusses bechira and comes to such a conclusion?
Wow. The molestor comment takes the cake.
“they still keep it covered always even in front of their husbands”
Good for them. May they all be zoche to sons who are kohanim gedolim.
“Yes, it is recommended”
By who?
“could you explain how that means some poskim allow music during the 3 weeks?”
RECORDED music. Check the footnotes. I dont own the sefer.
“And if after giving the tochocho they still are doing the aveira, you are halachicly *required* to publicly humiliate them until they comply.”
(Pardon the cynicism) I can just see people lining up and saying hinneni muchan umzuman already. A hetter to publicly humiliate someone.
There is a mitzvah of tochacha, which comes with a qualifier “lo tisa alav chet”.
“Unless you know for certain it is the case, you are halachicly *required* to give tochocho.”
There are halachos that dictate HOW one gives tochacha not just when.
“We should call the store owners to the carpet and request she stop selling pritzus.”
Dont assume the store owner is a female. In my neighborhood, several womens clothing stores are owned by men AND they work full time in the store (if i was a woman I would find that a little creepy – I dont shop in mens clothing stores that employ women, not because of any halachic reasons but I find it a little creepy).
Last summer a number of women in my neighborhood sent a very strongly worded letter to a store that actually dressed the mannequins in an untzniusdik manner (OK, no jokes about whether mannequins must observe tznius) to show just how the skirts could be worn “just at the kneE” or the elbows were just covered, if you didnt move a muscle) and basicly said they would not shop there and would publicize to as many people as possible not to shop there if they didnt fix the window diaply. Within a week, the mannequins were wearing long flowy denim skirts that would cover a fire truck, even when it was sitting down and climbing stairs. Dale Carnegie has said many times, people are motivated, by 2 things fear and money.
“They are saying ” I want my kid to be the best in the class”.
That is absolutely not true, at least not in every case. We held back one of our kids in kindergarten for a second year because, as the youngest kid, he was behind, socially and physically. In kindergarten it makes no difference, but in later grades it does. He thrived in the next year, when he was from among the oldest. Parents want their child to be able to hold their own among their classmates.
“2. In any event, a Yisoschor-Zevulin relationship is NOT tzedakah anyways — its an equal business partnership between the Yisoschor (i.e. Kollel learners) and Zevulin.”
From where do todays Zevuluns/the supporters of mosdos like BMG, Mir, Ponovezh and so on get the funds to create this partnership? How many tailors and shoemakers are todays Zevuluns.
“Yes, you are mistaken. Not to be acid, but is further demonstration why Chazal said women shouldn’t learn Gemorah. The Gemorah is agreeing with this observation regaring Kimchis.”
While I make no claims to understand the response they gave Kimchis, I have a hard time understanding how the phrase “harbe asu vlo hoeelu” indicates an agreement with her answer. Please clarify.
Missme: Exactly which mitzvah is someone who is not doing as Kimchis, not keeping?
“As long as its one per week, per month, or per year, there cannot be any Kol Isha singing at such time.”
Do they belong there, ever?
People CAN reach a certain standard, and perhaps they SHOULD want to. At the end of the day though, nobody has a right to upbraid someone for not upholding very high standards that are well beyond what is required lihalacha.
I think Rabbi Reisman, on one of his tapes said it best. He stated that (he didnt offer an opinion why) Bais Yaakovs simply dont teach tznius properly. Focusing on inches and hemlines is one thing. Truly explaining what Tznius really means, might make the difference in doing what halacha requires and striving to be like Kimchis (he didnt say the last sentcne, those are my words, trying to convey his idea).
“Do any frum women clothing stores prohibit men from being customers or coming in for whatever reason?”
How many men walk into (name your frum womens clothing/accesories/nail salon/ store here) in any given week?
Are you somehow implying it is appropriate for a man to walk into say, (I am making this up, any store that has this name, apologies) Friedmans Female Fashions?
How many frum stores play music of ANY kind, let alone non jewish woman vocalists or a radio station. How do you know it wasnt a jingle of some sort? Perhaps the owner didnt come into the store that day and a non jewish worker decided on the selection of music for the day? Why do you believe I think it is OK for a store to play non jewish music, especially with female vocalist, because I am trying to find a reason that another yid didnt do something wrong? Try not to look for and point out every negative thing about another yid. Look for the positive. Especially during the three weeks. If you do that, perhaps if this yid IS playing objectionable music, they will take you seriously if you point it out to them.
re: kimchis. There is what is required by halacha and what I will term hanhaga tova (perhaps chumra is a better term?). Upbraiding people because they dont strive for every hanhaga tova or chumra is counterproductive. Halevai people would follow the halacha. We can worry about producing more kimchises after that.
My favorite activity when I was in camp. Body painting. Basicly, get lots of water based paint, spread thick paper on the floor and pour on the paint and let the kids slide through it. The younger kids can do that all day. Now, whether the parents will appreciate the activity,…. we did this is sleepaway camp so their was plenty of time to wash the paint off the kids and out of the clothes.
“1) i wrote earlier (my first post) it was a woman singer, so i think that takes out Beethoven and Mozart”
But your question, divides the 2.
“Can you name one rav that says it’s mutar to listen to each of the following
1) goish music?
2) a woman singer?”
Number 1 implies ANY goyish music. Number 2 is specifically about listening to a woman sing.
“2) why should kol isha be any different? it is different. besides like i said before what you do at home is one thing, doing something onto others is a different story.”
Did YOU read what I wrote? Will try again. If you hold that taped music is somehow better than live music and is permitted during the 3 weeks, PERHAPS the same difference ALSO applies to kol isha. I am not saying it does, I am suggesting that perhaps it may.
“3) if “most” poskim assur something, a public forum, such as a store shouldn’t be doing it based on one or 2 poskim that say you could.”
If it is a womens clothing store where this music was played and kol isha was not a problem for the women shoppers, would yo uhave a taayna against the store?
“4) as Kasha stated this isn’t a question of should i walk out or stay, it’s a question of why is it on?”
If it is a womens clothing store for example, your question is regarding non jewish music, not an issue of kol isha. This is a valid question if this was the local dentist or pizza shop which is frequented by men and women.
So, do you understand why I asked you specifically about non jewish music AND kol isha? I understood you were trying to make 2 different points and ask 2 different questions. You didnt specify what type of store this was, so I am making distinctions on my own.
What Wolf is saying that in certain contexts, certain clothing is not “untsniusdik”. A woman may not wear something out in the street, but in the privacy of her own home, for her husband (I dont think it is necessary to elaborate) or just for hersel if she is the only one around, she can wear whatever she wants. Is she suddenly not a tzuna? If a woman decides that in the privacy of her own home, she wants to wear a pair of sweatpants (begged ish is not a concern in my hypothetical case) to do the housework, is she not allowed to? what if she decided that its easier to do housework in a tank top?
1) Goish music. Please define. Beethoven and Mozart were goyim, does your question apply to their music as well?
2) Woman singer. If you hold that recorded music is not the same as live (which is basis for listening to taped music during sefira and 3 weeks according to those who do), why should kol isha be any different?
3) Music during 3 weeks. May I refer you to Rav Simcha Bunim Cohens sefer on “the 3 weeks” where he has a lengthy discussion on listening to music. While he does state that many (most?) poskim dont allow listening to recorded music, there are some who permit it.
4) Again, Rav SB cohen discusses whether one must walk out of a room where music is playing (his example, a DRs office) and he writes you do not. Of course he writes this in the context of halachos of the 3 weeks, and in no way implies he allows someone to play non jewish music in the office, but, the listener likely does not have to walk out.
I didnt mean to imply that Rav Moshe Assured listening to music at any time. Was trying to point out that listening to music at any time during the year is not such a clear cut issue overall.
Rav SB Cohens sefer DOES say that many poskim (it may even say most – but I dont remember) forbid listening to recorded music during the three weeks and goes so far as to say that a number of poskim even forbid listening to acapella (even SINGING is assur according to some poskim).
Of course, everyone should follow their own Rav, that goes without saying.
“TO JOSH: im not talking about if he should go im talking about a serious ben torah who wants to sit and learn AND his parents want to force him to go.”
Poskim have discussed this shayla and every case is different. If this is a real live case, I’m sure the serious bachur would at the very least take it to his rebbe for advice.
“You can make a very good parnassah without college.”
Statisticly, those who are college educated earn a lot more than those who are not. Of course it is all from hashem, but people must do proper hishtadlus. I was told (when I discussed my personal situation with my Rebbe) that proper hishtadlus is not waiting for a money tree to grow in the yard.
“You should also then personally believe that all EMPLOYERS should have time cards and capacity tests, and those who don’t live up to their responsibilities or required knowledge should get fired, based on your comment”
Guess what. Many employers DO have time cards or at least time sheets that employees clock in or sign daily. In fact, some require signing in and out for lunch and other breaks too. Every job that I ever held also came with a bechina, at least once a year. In the workplace it is called “annual review”, some companies give this bechina quarterly or semi annually too. Either way, it is IRRELEVANT what employers do for their employees when discussing what someone in the beis medrash is supposed to be doing.
Rav Simcha Bunim Cohens sefer/book by Artscroll on the “Three Weeks” pretty clearly states that most ( I believe it says “almost all”, but am not 100% certain) poskim agree that recorded music should not be listened to during the three weeks (I didnt read the list of poskim he brings in the footnotes). He even says there are many poskim who dont allow listening to “singing without musical accompanyment” (which I assume means acapella).
It is important to point out that many poskim dont agree with listening to music, live or taped the whole year, zecher lechurban. In one of R’ Moshe Z’l tshuvos about listening to taped music during sefira, he begins by asking, who said it is muttar all year long.
The fundamentals, (halacha, how to raise kids IE chasidish, litvish, sefardi)yes, but things like, paper or plastic on shabbos, can be worked out by mature adults.
Kasha: Ponovezh has nothing against the medina.
Rabbi Reisman has an excellent shiur on Tznius (the title of the shiur is actually wearing shaitels) which is apropo for both men and women.
Since there are many well respected LORs, and the opinions of these LORs regarding the “uniform of a yid” varies from one to the next, it follows that either there are multiple uniforms (which is all the rage in the sports world today, to encourage fans to purchase multiple jerseys) or no uniforms at all.
“Per my LOR, it includes a white shirt.”
Per my LOR is does not. According to your LOR by wearing a blue shirt I am ipso facto dressing like a goy?
Just an FYI: My LOR is the one you praised as a tzadik on another thread.
“Once they violated halacha ipso facto, they lost any right to recognition by the Torah community.”
Ponovezh and other mosdos politely disagree with you.
Max, your missing the point. nobody needs a frum store to sell pork, OR mini skirts. If someone was so inclined they have plenty of places to purchase both, outside the frum community. It is the pushing the line type clothing that this thread is discussing which of course can be purchased anywhere, BUT is also sold by frum shops. Why do they sell it? they have a yetzer hara, the same way people who push the boundaries of tznius do. Some people dont mind mucking around in grey areas, even when they are not all that grey and sometimes the yetzer hara somehow convinces you that it isnt all that grey, but rather pristine white.
http://www.oukosher.org/index.php/common/article/fish_industry_kashrus_meeting_w_rabbi_moshe_vaie/
According to the article, Rav Vaie maintains that Rav Wosner (and Rav Elyashiv) feels one should “be vigilant” (whatever that means).
Hello99. Yes, the policy not to use the fish is a business decision because it is StarK policy to “strive to have our kosher certified products accepted by all kosher consumers,” meaning, lets be machmir right now, until we have clarity. If they felt it was prohibited by halacha they would not have written that. Dont believe me, call them and ask them.
Rabbi Heineman recommends consumers be machmir until things are clarified. Is that a psak that the worms are assur or a statement that says, we are not sure what the halacha is, so better safe then sorry.
“The uniform of the Jew may vary over time, but there is always a Jewish uniform.”
So, what IS the jewish uniform?
The pnimius is also meorrer the chitzonios.
Is my sons high school, the Rabbeim watch closely those who decide to wear only white shirts, and very often after observation discourage cetrtain boys from doing so. The official yeshiva dress code allows for blue and pinstriped shirts.
Wearing a white shirt announces your affiliation, the same way, lihavdil, wearing a baseball jersey announces the team you like to follow. Wearing the uniform does not you a member of the team and wearing a white shirt does not make you a ben torah. In the minds of many, since the outside impacts the inside, it stands to follow that wearing a white shirt makes one a ben torah and baal middos.
To follow along the theme expressed by wellinformed. I asked my rav what is and what isnt muttar to listen to during the three weeks. He told me, lets leave the halachic angle out of the discussion for a second and look at the hashkafa of the question. If someone was R’L in aveilus for a parent, would they listen to taped or acapella music?
“What bothers me is why are “frum” clothing stores selling this shmutz to our women.”
Because women are buying them. If nobody would buy it, they wouldnt carry it. Ever see a “frum” store try to sell pants to women?
“Not that I believe in over policing things but let all the concert ban Rabbis be busy with the real problems.”
I know of at least one who DOES speak about to the members of his kehilla about establishments that he feels crosses a line. Not only clothing, food too.
“i hope were not all THAT superficial. “
i think that horse is long out of the barn.
“What happened??”
When priorities become warped and distorted bad things happen.
Wellinformed. Of course it is the fault of the husbands and fathers every bit it the fault of the wives and daughters.
Isn’t it up to a man to uphold standards of halacha in his home? If his wife was not careful in the kitchen vis a vis kashrus and he knew it, would he be allowed to keep quiet? By not saying anything to his wife when it comes to tznius he gives his tacit approval for her mode of dress. Regarding his daughter, is their no obligation on a father to ensure his daughter dresses appropriately? Again, his silence is tacit approval of how she dresses. So, instead of blaming women for how hey dress, blame the husbands and fathers for allowing it.
Type 1 Diabetes 101.
What is insulin?
Insulin is a hormone. It makes our body’s cells absorb glucose from the blood. The glucose is stored in the liver and muscle as glycogen and stops the body from using fat as a source of energy.
When there is very little insulin in the blood, or none at all, glucose is not taken up by most body cells. When this happens our body uses fat as a source of energy. Insulin is also a control signal to other body systems, such as amino acid uptake by body cells.
Insulin is produced in the pancreas. When protein is ingested insulin is released.
Insulin is also released when glucose is present in the blood. After eating carbohydrates, blood glucose levels rise.
Insulin makes it possible for glucose to enter our body’s cells – without glucose in our cells they would not be able to function. Without insulin the glucose cannot enter our cells.
And as Mod-80 stated, cells with no glucose is like a car with no gasoline. Your body doesnt work, especially after it starts burning fat and the resulting byproduct cause high levels of acid to be found in the blood, leading to what is called DKA (forgive the spelling…diabetic ketonic acedocis).
Regarding fasting, Rabbi Meisels over at FWD (friends with diabetes, or as he calls his group – rayim mesukim)has all sorts of tips for fasting including many pre fast tips.