apushatayid

“go around trying to find the most meikel shitah in everything”

Many of R’ Moshes psakim were the more lenient shitta. There is a story recorded in the Artscroll Biography of R’ moshe how a certain person when told to consult R’ Moshe was told that he didnt want a kula. He was told that R’ Moshe doesnt look for Kulos he looks for the halacha the way he sees it. What you feel is a kula is how he determines the halacha. With that said, it is important for those who are “machmir” or “maikel” in any situation to understand that people have Rabbonim who issue a psokim. It is one thing to pick and choose kulos everytime, it is quite another to follow the psak of your Rav, whatever side of the kula/chumra fence it comes down on.

Personally, I have no problems with “chumros”. the problem i have is with the people who have decided thattheir chumra is binding on all klal yisroel and those who do not abide by the chumra are going against the halacha. Be machmir all you want, just dont impose your chumra on me. Thats the job of my Rav.

Its been almost a year since I visited the site seforimonline.com last time I saw the site they had a sefer called “sefer HaVikuach” which if memory serves me is the Rambans writings on his famous disputation that got him kicked out of spain. If that’s not what it is, then they have another sefer which is the rambans writings on this disputation and seer havikuach is another sefer written by a different rishon that throughly refutes xtianity and its beliefs as well as its “proofs” from tanach.

In general, there are some fascinating seforim that are available to be learned (and I think downloaded) at that site.

I think it is irresponsible to do nothing more than rant on an internet blog. if you don’t to do anything, then tell me who this mother is and I will read her the riot act. If it doesn’t work, I will ask the shayla about telling child services.

Smartcookie. Ask your Rav if you are permitted to tell your relative if she doesn’t watch her kids you will call “Child Servces”.

Also ask if you are permitted to teach her a lesson by walking away with one of her kids.

That walkout not only made a point, it also defused an argument used by missionaries. People tend to get all worked up in an argument with them and they always remain calm, which further riles up some people. The missionary then argues “see someone with the peace loving yashka in their heart is always calm, and you, why you are all worked up”.

For those traveling through Newarks Penn Station beware that a group of missionaries has set up a table in the station. Its best to ignore them, they were rather confrontational when I politely declined their handouts.

I grew up in a youth minyan. My kids davened at the local “teen minyan” until it was disbanded due to space constraints. I, as well as my kids, learned how to daven for the amud (nusach and the like), had the ability to lain without the pressure of an entire parsha and generally got used to doings things in public. As long there are responsible adults to ensure it doesn’t become a 45 minute shabbos morning ruish job with joking around and talking throughout it is an excellent idea. I currently daven at a “yeshiva type” minyan, and the one thing my boys miss about the disbanded teen minyan is that they don’t get to daven for the amud or lain like they used to. In fact it is a sore point in my family right now (perhaps deserving of its own topic), but my teenage boys absolutely hate davening in the mnyan that I currently daven in. For now we have a compromise. One shabbos they daven at my minyan, one shabbos I daven at a local shul that they prefer and the other 2 weeks I daven where I prefer and they daven where they prefer. We would like to resolve this before rosh hashana permanently.

I felt the same as PBA, when I davened in Yeshiva and there were no kids running around. Then i got married and lived too far to walk tot he yeshiva in inclement weather and started davening in shuls with kids running around and creating a racket. Now, I am a firm believer in “shul is not a babysitting service”. If they create a disturbance, leave them home (I wish I could tell this to some women regarding their husbands!).

Since “reading material” was mentioned. To me, reading anything, including looking into a gemara, during chazaras hashatz or any other time during davening for that matter, tells me the person is bored and would rather be anywhere else doing anything else, but in shul davening. Those who aren’t in the mood to look into a sefer or read, talk.

I used to enjoy “messing” with missionaries. About 18 years ago I was handing out anti missionary literature in Brighton Beach for Beth Shifra. Along came a cheerful missionary with rapid fire questions “what about psalm 2, jeremiah 31, isiah 7 and 53” and so on. I asked him to open up and show me what it says and what it is supposed to teach me. He started reading from his king james bible and I stopped him. The original hebrew I told him, or don’t bother.we got to discussing a passuk in melachim and I told him I would like to offer him an interpretation. I read a few psukim in hebrew and told him this is a very imprtant prophecy for the 20th century. It says: a babe will be born and he will build a cathedral in the bronx. He will smite 60 four baggers in a season and subdue all his enemies. They will call him the sultan of swat and his sale will forever curse those pagan red sox.

He told me “that’s ridiculous” and I told him, on what do you base that statement? You can’t read hebrew let alone understand it. You want to sell eternal salvation to these people based on alledged proofs from these verses and you can’t even read the words. That’s more outrageous and insane then the interpretation I just offered. He walked away.

The only protocol there should be is mentchlechkeit.

“Since you would not do it in front of Rav Chaim Kanievsky so you shouldnt do it.”

If R’ Chaim Kanievsky was sitting next to the basketball court in my bungalow colony, he would see me playing in shorts. I guess for me, the wearing of shorts it muttar according to this standard.

My kids absolutely love playing “Settlers”. I just cant stand it.

Several people have posited that it is “assur” for boys to wear shorts. so far, the only “issur” mentioned is trampling on someone elses seisitivities and the always easy to throw around “tznius”. Is there a posek that has issued a psak that it is forbidden for a man to go out jogging in a pair of shorts?

Please consider the following question and answer.

Q: Is it permissible to pray the Amida while wearing shorts?

A: Only in areas where it is customary to wear shorts in the presence of prominent and distinguished people, such as in agricultural communities; even in such cases, however, one should not serve as Chazan while wearing shorts (Halacha Berura).

If the wearing of shorts was categorically assur, would this answer make any sense?

The Q & A comes from here. http://www.mishnaberura.com/Default.asp?ChelekID=1&SeifID=319

I’m not offering links to the photos (the mods wouldnt allow the links – im sure) but I am not talking about knickers. I’m talking about shorts.

To the questioner.

Please explain how you are using the word “tznius” in your question. Why are you limiting the question to boys? Are you certain about men? At what age does boys end and men begin in your question? Are you talking about a 4 year old an 11 year old or a 27 year old?

Rav Berel Wein writes (I think it is in “Vintage Wein”) of a man in Yerushalayim who had just made a bris for a son, after 6 girls. His girls were named, Gila, Rina, Ditza, Chedva, Ahava and Achva. Of course, he named his son Sholom.

my all time favorite name story occured when I was first introduced to a coworker who had the name Yaw Wa (there was a last name too) on the nameplate, I was all tongue tied trying to say nice to meet you, er uh Ya when she cut me off, “ita Amy”!.

I’ve worked with a Shaniqua, a Xioun, a Lie-Jen an Ionnis and an Abdelardo. If I have to learn to call them by their names, they should have to learn how to pronounce Yerachmiel Getzel (no its not my real name – but it is the name of a co-worker who chose to go by the name Adam).

Why is the focus on Bat Mitzvahs when it is quite clear that R’ Moshe was not happy with Bar mitzvah celebrations too?

I miss Frusen Gladje ice cream. Cant find it anywhere. Was pretty popular in the 80s, and I havent seen it anywhere in almost 20 years.

Helpful. Could you poinpoint from where in any of the three theshuvos cited here you draw the following conclusion “Besides, how many of us knew beforehand there is a halachic problem making a Bas Mitzvah ceremony?”

I can see where he states that in a shul it should be forbidden, but a general halachic issue with making a bat mitzvah party? Where does he imply there is something wrong? In fact, he says to make it at home (my addition, like any other birthday party).

What is the point the thread is trying to bring out? Overspending on simchos? (if yes, why the emphasis on bat mitzvahs). Making a Bat Mitzvah in general (when the teshuva quoted implies there is nothing signifigant)? Spending on frivolous things in general(with the implication that a Bar Mitzvah party is something frivolous and it is used as an illustration).

I would have (and have done this in the past), politely asked if he could keep his voice down.