anonymrs

yogibooboo

my husband and I knew in the middle of the FIRST date that we wanted to marry each other. we shmoozed on the phone A LOT before we met and then fianlly went out. after 4 dates we got engaged. b”H we are very happy. of course u learn new things about each other every day but that only happens after living with someone. you wont know what they are really like till u r married to them because again until u live with them u never really know!

yogi, are you me???? i never knew we had so much in common 🙂 we spoke once before we went out, bu because we were in different states, so only went out on the weekends. my husband came to me over two weekends, and then i went to him the third. we got engaged saturday night, on the way home from our date, although our date had been spent trying to figure out a wedding date. also, my mother was sitting shiva then, so when i was at my sister house until i went back home, i couldnt even tell anyone!! (although we had a little unofficial l’chaim at my in laws house with all the siblings)

thats where you are mistaken. a bachur should learn what he needs to learn in order to be able to be a functioning member of society, not in order to get a diploma. where in the torah does it say that anything outside of torah is assur? werent many of our greatest personalities doctors and scientists, and quite well versed in secular knowledge? what is the difference between then and now that makes this knowledge assur? as far as i know, in order to really understand gemorah, you need at least some knowledge of math and science. it relly bothers me when people say that learning things that Hashem gave us the ability to learn and understand is bitul torah. its not like high school boys (or girls by the way) are being asked to learn philosophy and evolution.

and i dont know who you are, but you are definitely not a rav if this is the way you are conducting yourself. please dont give fr or rabanim a bad name by making people think that this is the way people with such a title or in that city behave.

i find it amazing htat all anyone can do is complain. no matter what happens, someone will complain. this one says theres too much vacation. that one says theres not enough. WHY CANT PEOPLE JUST STOP COMPLAINING and deal with the situation that they have. i work in a school also, and today was our first day off. my son has school though friday. next year he will probably be off longer. as he gets older he will have a longer break i think. one person actually had a great suggestion- let the buchrim and sem girls teach- its great experience, and a great way to harness all of that energy that kids have right before vacation.

i am a: mother, wife, daughter, grand daughter, sister, aunt, cousin, niece, daughter in law, sister in law…..and lots of other things too!!

registering you can do whenever you want, just make sure to keep your registry updated, as things may go out of stock.

kicking you may not recognize until later. it may feel gassy, or fluttery, or like i real kick, only much softer. i had that with my fifrst one really early, can you imagine???? i was feeling things at 13-14 weeks, and ppl told me im nuts, and i would say i know i am, but i still know what i felt.

about the child care, i wouldnt start looking till closer to the end of the school year. by the way, i heard theres a new baby sitter in your neighborhood who is REALLY inexpensive!! you should check her out. as far as i know she doesnt have any other kids yet.

i dont get it…what does anyone need such a stroller for, except to say “i have money.” im not trying to judge, i just dont get it…..

and one more thing. no teacher is educationg my children as a favos it is a service that i pay for, just like any other service. thats not to put down teachers at all, as i think they are some of the most overworked and underpaid and underappreciated people out there. BUT….a favor is something that is done out of the goodness of your heart, not for monetary gain. any teacher who has the attitude that they are doing a favor needs to recheck THEIR priorities. (sorry, just my opinion)

im not sure which sid eof the debate im on….where i work, we had half a day today, a regular (till 1) day tomorrow, and a full day monday.

i understand where student is coming from. for parents who are working and/or who are in school, its hard. it doesnt matter how far in advance you know about it, if you have to pay for it you have to pay for it. yes, its great for the kids, and yes its a great time to take advantage and spend some time together, but not everyone can afford to do that. not everyone can take off when their kids are off. for those of us who dont have family nearby, that makes it even harder. it would be nice if i could just drop my kids off by bubbby, but neither set of grandparents live in this state. and my siblings are all at least an hour away.

on the other hand, i understand where the teachers are coming from too. yea, they bring work home with them. yes they are on the phone with therapists. yes they are on the phone with parents. and yes they have their own lives and families too. i understand they need time to cook and prepare and whatever.

now heres the thing. there are some parents who do not prioritize. there are some parents who dont take the time. but i dont think its fair to jump on someone who is having a hard time and say she must be one of them. i would say that a good percentage of parents DO prioritize.

if my kids had off tomorrow, i would be upset, only because there is no reason for it. its very nice to make a long weekend of purim, and maybe be able to go away for shabbos if you can get back home in time. most of my friends whose kids have off are upset. some parents were even talking at the begining of the year about trying to get it changed. you want to have time to make your mishloach manos? i do too! but i have to work, so ill figure it out. i want to have time to clean my house to, but i have a job, and a family, so i need to figure out how to work around that.

i dont want to say too much, but this was my husbands minhag before we got married, and we asked our rav right after we got married and he told us we could continue this way. this is not just for women- its fofr our whole family. but it is a VERY individual situation, and i dont know anyone else who holds like we do.

i ignore all invitations on fb, but i will be doing this anyway.

outsider, while you are right that people should be allowed to do what they want in their own home, they also need to be considerate of their neighbors. i used to live in the apt above yogi (before her and her husband moved in) and my neighbors downstairs never had any complaints. you need to be considerate of your neighbors, so if that means doing laundry a little earlier, or being a little bit more quiet when youre on the phone, then that should be done.

and for the record, i do know that she tried to make peace with the neighbor, and the neighbor didnt give a darn.

p.s. you should come over for ss again- we had a lot of fun!!

“If you buy one daughter-in-law a 2 carat stone, you can’t cry poverty down the line. Keep in mind what you are doing when you start out. What you do for one you will have to do for the others.”

100% you can cry poverty!! what you did for one child has nothing to do with what you do for another. each child is different, and the circumstances in which you find yourself at the time will also be different. i dont advise going all out for the first child, but that doesnt mean that each child down the line will receive the same things.

my personal opinion is that THIS is part of the reason why young men and women expect things when they get engaged. “you have to do the same for each one” is not right at all. if you raise your chldren to think that they all get the same things, then of course they will expect and be disappointed when they dont receive.

do you treat all of your children the same way at home? some may need a little more of a tlc-type of chinuch, and one may need a little more of a hard line type, and one may be incredible self motivated. they dont lose their indivu=iduality when they get engaged, and each still has their own needs.

(sorry it was so long)

i heard of a chasan and kalla who got divorced right after the chupa- they got engaged, and were told better to get divorced than to break tana’im (which they wrote at the engagement) so they had a get written up before, and right after the chupa he gave it to her 🙁

the rule in our house is that the first time you come you are a guest, after that pretty much make yourself at home.

a few things to remember:

ask the hostess before clearing off the table- maybe she is not ready for things to be brought in yet

when you DO clear, ask where things go.

if your host family has certain rules (for lack of a better word) in their house, follow those rules- in our house, the rules are if you are male cover your head, no cursing, no male-female touching (unless you are married)

also if your host or hostess asks you to stop a topic of conversation, LISTEN whether you understand the reason or not.

be polite and always say thank you before you leave.

about the hosts children, i dont really care either way if someone says something about my kids. i DO have a problem when someone tries to chase my kids upstairs because he “just wants to give him a hug” (hes not invited back, and his name is not allowed to be mentioned)

if you are sleeping company, dont come out of your room when the men come home from shul. ask the hostess how you can help. before you leave, ask if you should strip the bed. make sure the room is neat, anything you took out should be back in place…..

also, whether eating or sleeping over, always tell your host family if there are any allergies or special diets they should know about. if youre vegetarian, dont show up at someones house on shabbos and epect to be served lots of the things you like unless your host knows about it.

there is a pamphlet called (i think) yad eliezer by (again, i think) r’ pesach krohn about the halachos involved in being a lefty. some things are different- washing, getting dressed/ putting on shoes, tefilin, to name a few.

i think it was written because his son (for whom it is named) is a lefty, so while learning the halachos he compiled them all into one neat little place.

im not sure why so many people are getting bent out of shape- jaymatt didnt ask anything about changing his child, or mention that he views it negatively in any way.

for those of us who are left-handed, there are some things that are harder, and i think that is what jaymatt was asking about. for me, when i started driving i used to turn the car on and put it into gear with my left hand. it was uncomfortable, but after trying it with my right hand a few times i decided that doing it backwards was more comfortable. i also couldnt unlock the front door with my right hand till i was about 17 or 18.

as someone mentioned, it is considered a moom, and a kohen or levi may not serve in the bais hamikdosh. at least that is what my husband explained to me when he saw me washing my oldest son left hand first- not because i wanted him to be a lefty, but because that was more comfortable to me. now i am so used to doing it right handed for my kids that i often do it backwards for myself 🙂

for me, its a couple who used to live in the city where i grew up, and a rabbi from a summer program in israel.

(by the way, i think its a beautiful song)

i think they will probably make the decision late tonight or early tomorrow morning. my sons school sent home a note yesterday that they will not post a message on their machine until 6:30 tomorrow morning.

We pay enough in tuition and get off half a day every Fri. not to mention every Yom Tov. The kids have enough “days of rest”,so who thinks we should ban the annual mid-winter break? Now I need to keep up with the Kleins and the Schwartzes and take my whole family away to Great Wolf or Florida???

As for the teachers and all school employees who will find this post very annoying,let me tell you that you get off a whole summer,and still get paid,and if this would be any other job in a store or office,it wouldnt just come with a week-ten days off in the end of Jan. just for nothing….

Also,didnt we just have anice break two weeks ago when our schools got cancelled for 3 days??

I understand its nice to have the kids home for a couple of days so they can go out and do some nice activities and bond with friends and family,but a week or ten days is just too much…

Whos with me? Let us storm the schools in protest!!

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seriously, your issue is that kids have enough days off and now you need to keep up with the schwartzes? those are the most rediculous arguments! as it is kids barely get any physical activity in school, and people want to ban sports and exercising, and now they cant have time off either….these poor kids….

it is YOUR problem that you feel that you need to keep up with the schwartz’s, not mine and certainly not my childrens. i DONT feel like i have to keep up with them, although i love them dearly and think they are wonderful neighbors.

our family vacations have always been to educational/historic places, so while they are not in school, my children are still able to learn something. also, this is a rare chance for our whole family to spend time together. no one said you have to go somewhere big or expensive or far away. again, that is YOUR desire to keep up with the schwartz. (by the way, they must be wonderful people, because everyone is always complaining about having to keep up with them, and i cant imagine wanting to keep up with someone who is not an amazing person)

as to teachers getting off in the summer, youve obviously never been a teacher. most teachers i know spend the summer trying to prep wonderful lessons for the next year. dont know if youve ever tried to prep, but it doesnt take 5 minutes. as for the rest of the staff, they dont get off the entire summer! my mom has 4 weeks to take off as she wishes, on condition that everyone coordinates their vacations so that the office is always covered.

as for the kids, as ive said they deserve and NEED a break from all their hard work. by the way, i cant think of ANYONE I KNOW who has a week to ten days off. my sister has quite a few kids, and although her kids vacations overlap, none of them have off the exact same days, except for kids in the same schools. most kids have off three MAYBE four days, and all the boys i know have off LESS days than the girls which means the family cant go away anyway because SOMEONE will be missing school.

if you want to take all of that away from YOUR children then get them a tutor for that week. dont take it away from MY children too.

i dont think obama is qualified, nor do i think he is doing a good job.

however, i dont think palin is qualified either. for vp maybe, but not for president.

i cant believe no one has mentioned the longest pesach!

all the tapes i grew up listening to are now in my house for my kids- mmm, shhhhhh its loshon hara, when zaidy was young, the talking coins, lets sing the alef bais, lets sing achat shtayim….my husband and i started our collection right after we got married- during sheva brachos!

just because people DO something, that does not make it right. this can also be reversed- just because people DONT do something, that does not make it wrong. i personally dont think there is anything with a girl riding a bike….or skating, or roller blading or anything else of the sort. as long as she is covered appropriately (probably not in a long skirt, as that may get stuck in the chain) what is the problem? people keep saying no to all different types of exercise, yet they expect young women to be thin and beautiful, AND to be in good enough shape to keep having kids. would anyone care to explain how a womany is supposed to stay in shape if all these different types of HEALTHY EXERCISE are banned?

i personally did not get tested, so im not sure how it works when you call up, but i thought that they dont give info to people who are too invested in a relationship (im not even sure at what point that would be, as some people know after the first date and others go out for a few weeks or a few months)

“I hat to say this but if the Moslems can fast 40 days we can stop being such sissies and fast for one day without all these mishegassin!”

please correct me if i am wrong but i think

1- its is not 40 straight days (the body is not capable of that)- its 40 consecutive days, from sunrise to sunset. they have a big feast after

2- they may be allowed to drink

where is this going on?