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Anyone interested can check out US News and World Report’s “Best Careers” for 2011. Registered nurse made their list.
It’s kinda funny to say a nursing job doesn’t pay enough when many men are encouraged not to work, or have no marketable skills. I think it is a fine career for anyone to enter.
Straying men or women are a symptom of a deeper underlying problem. Problems wont be solved by worrying about what others are doing or wearing, but by developing self-understanding and maturity.
There are probably many reasons for shalom bayis problems. There is no one size fits all cause or solution.
For consideration, is the quiet revolution that has changed the roles of husband and wife in the marriage. The traditional husband as breadwinner, has been replaced by a combination of income from wife, support from relatives, charity, and public welfare. This may have caused a fundamental change in marital relationships, with many unintended consequences.
Raccoons and possums in Midwood.
“but the learning guy who is sweating over a gemarah is considered second class.”
If you mean the guy who fulfills his responsibilities and learns as well- he should be respected.
If you mean the guy who starts his learning career by looking to marry a rich father-in-law; no.
By judging others harshly, one only hurts oneself. Negative stares and comments are not likely to change another’s behavior in a way that you would like, and may harm your own body. Among the body’s responses to anger are a rise in blood pressure, and the release of hormones and chemicals. Likewise, being pleasant to others has many positive effects on others and on yourself.
Doing the right thing is its own reward. Isn’t having self respect better than having chicken cutlets and a steak?
I wear blue jean shorts.
Really comfortable in the summer.
A few years ago a prominent frum lawyer specializing in divorces appeared on one of the Jewish talk shows in the evening. A caller asked if the changing roles of husband and wife (wife is the major breadwinner in the family while husband learns) could be contributing to the rising divorce rate. Her answer, “It’s not working out.”
“..If they are happy with you, and you and your wife are happy and interested in learning why not?..”
The young man seems not to be happy with himself.
Ever watch a baby grow?
They work very hard to turn over, crawl, then stand and walk. Soon they learn to ride a tricycle, then a two wheeler. They are constantly striving for independence. No wonder a young man would feel uncomfortable being supported by his parents. The pull of being an independent adult is very strong.
If someone merges into your lane abruptly and too close to you for comfort, you just got cut off.
“/c the main issue is not the guys getting what they want. the main problem is the encouragement of values that are the antithesis of what they allegedly stand for….”
I think you said it best.
Guys that age are by their nature and lack of life experience are often immature. Where are their elders to guide them?
Loved that story.BP
Reminds me of the expression of “not seeing the forest for the trees.”
“..even if her husband earns a parnasa she will have to live with less if it is only one salary, and in such a case she would be living a kollel life style without the zechus of Torah, i dont envy her.”
Again, money isn’t everything. Having less but independently supporting your family is a sign of maturity.
…she will have to live with less if it is only one salary,… “
The money may be less, but how much is it worth to be raising your children yourself? Priceless!
“Yes, but I don’t know what that has to do with this thread.”
Why bother presenting a good argument when you can discredit the poster. Happens here quite a bit.
“m ain kemach ain torah just means that if you have no food, you cannot learn. If you are supported by your parents, in laws, Yeshiva, or wife, you are not in a situation where you have to steal, and you have fulfilled the Chazal.”
Interesting that government welfare programs are not mentioned.
It saddens me that while public libraries and Lipa concerts are to be avoided as “dangerous;” the danger of able bodied, intelligent young men getting acclimated to welfare is ignored.
A person can make a great living with or without college. An important factor is having a strong work ethic.
Living off your parents, in laws, Yeshiva, or wife is not having a work ethic. Neither is living off the government. The long term effects of this dependency on families may be very negative.
“..this topic is discussed with slight variations every single week over here…’
The fact that this topic is discussed so often here may reflect the fact that so many are uneasy with some aspects of the kollel ideology. I know I am. Diehards will never listen to other opinions. I do wonder if these discussions here and at other forums have changed people’s positions on the learner/earner question.
A bachur I know set up a laundry business at his yeshiva.That entrepreneurial spirit has to come out somewhere.
I’ll often meshulachim a shot of schnapps if they appear to need one.
“Only police can pull a license plate name.”
Just do a search and you’ll see many companies will supply that information. I had occasion to buy a used car and used the VIN (posted on the windshield registration) to see who owned the car previously.
As to breaking windows for revenge; I’d hate to see another Yid go before Judge Million justifying a stupid act.
“I know where you live, you don’t know who I am.”
You may not be as anonymous as you think.
For a small fee, the license plate of a car can be used to locate the registered owner of a car, via a public record database.
“I am learning to post my thoughts and then not go back too often to argue.”
I don’t think you’ll ever change the minds of the die-hards here. However, your logical arguments probably influence many readers here who choose not to respond. In that way you are always a real winner.
I had the procedure and was up and about within a week.
Very eloquent, aposhitermaidel.
The issue as I see it is not learning or working. The issue is the nature of family life. It seems to me the kollel lifestyle is a major social experiment involving the husband, wife, children, and extending to the in-laws. Incidentally, elderly parents could hope that their children would help them out as they became older. These days, elderly parents are delaying retirement in order to continue supporting children well into adulthood.
Love that song!
Wild turkey is great to serve at a kiddush.