“1. cant eat gebructs”
Has Celiac disease, got it.
“2. he has to take his plate into the kitchen to clean them after the friday night seudah.”
Ability to turn 1 plate into more than one, in other words clumsy, got it.
“3. he has to wear his hat and jacket”
Not a clothing thief, got it.
“4. he must know shas”
Know, or know of?
“5. his tatty must be rich”
His father is happy with what he has, got it.
“6. his name has to be either moishe or yanky.”
But he can’t have both of those names, got it.