- This topic has 63 replies, 27 voices, and was last updated 13 years, 7 months ago by .
-
Posts
-
There is a discussion about a man on a date ordering a beer…what would you do if a women ordered one?
I would drive her home immediately and wish her the best of luck on her future.
please keep in mind it could be for lactating purposes.
i have heard some say that when women are nursing, if they have difficulties , sometimes beer helps.
i haven’t figured out if the beer helps produce the milk or helps de stress the mother.
so the next time you see a woman downing a beer, think to yourself, perhaps she is a nursing mother not just a lush.
I don’t know. Eeees and I drank on every date that we went on… both before and after we were married.
The Wolf
Same thing I would say about a boy who drinks alchohol in a non-mitzvah setting. (Mitzva setting being a Shabbos kiddush, a vort, ect)
It speaks volumes about the person, and would be (for me at least) a serious bellwether.
To be fair, the poor kids might just not be bright enough to know what they just did was wrong, so I would reveal the reason you are dropping the date (if you choose to do so).
It might be a wake-up call for the offender.
Ask her out on a second date
nothing wrong with drinking in moderation
I imagine that would depend on the age of the couple dating and the environment they are in. If it is a young couple, I would be very wary of it.
i would order one too. 🙂
mewho, seriously if she is nursing why would she be on a date?
aries, thank you for picking up on that.
tho in actuallity, i do know of a nice young lady who got married, got pregnant, left husband while pregnant and divorced all within one year. if she is nursing she could fit my post.
aries: You were dead-set against men drinking on a date (in the other thread), and yet here you are more open-minded about a woman downing a beer? Shocking!
I don’t know. Eeees and I drank on every date that we went on… both before and after we were married.
We’re not discussing soft drinks.
We’re not discussing soft drinks.
My apologies then.
The Wolf
” I would be intrigued… “
Now that you mention it, details DO matter.
Did she also order a beer chaser? Maybe there’s some redeeming factor in this after all!
I would rather look at “how” she/he drank the beer. What difference does it make if it’s beer or water. Some people, myself included, can’t drink water. This being the case, why may I not have a drink of beer instead?
My apologies then.
Why? You gave me a smile.
“how” she/he drank the beer”
Good point!
Was it chugged from the bottle? Tells you something.
Was is sipped thru a straw? Tells you something else!
Sages in the Talmud are recorded to have had beer and wine as the drink of the day; and I don’t think them women drank diet coke.
if i was a guy and a girl ordered beer on a date I would ask her for the fastest route to get her home.
Sages in the Talmud are recorded to have had beer and wine as the drink of the day; and I don’t think them women drank diet coke.
The women drank the diet coke of the day, just as you posited that the men drank the beer of the day.
mike- LOL good line… I would ask her father to come get her as soon as possible!
did she order ”lite”beer or regular?
if its regular prepare for a beer belly.
same for the men!
Reminds me of a funny story. Once I went on a shidduch to a hotel lobby. Apparently you were not allowed to sit in the lobby unless you were a guest of the hotel or ordering an alcoholic drink. Someone came over to tell us that. We were an hour in so it was to early to end the date and I didn’t feel like going anywhere else so I ordered a drink. The girl asked what it tasted like and long story short I got her one too. Then she got really drunk off one shot! Bad idea. That was our last time.
yb- omg hysterical! thank you
last time drinking?
last time dating?
last time at the hotel?
So I guess there’s more to your “123” suffix than we originaly thought!
yeshivabochur123
Did that really happen?? Hilarious!
yb123: How’d she act when drunk?
“The women drank the diet coke of the day, just as you posited that the men drank the beer of the day.’
Find me a woman that likes any of the above, and I’ll show you woman who can drink like a guy.
Find me a woman that likes any of the above, and I’ll show you woman who can drink like a guy.
My wife likes cholent, and she doesn’t drink. Then again, from that list, I only like cholent too and I don’t really drink either.
The Wolf
she started giggling a lot told me some interesting stories and then threw up. Actually she was more interesting and fun when she was drunk. She then said no to a third date. I figured she would. Also to clarify the hotel lobby was also the bar (I didn’t know this as the bar was on the other side of the room) that’s why you had to buy a drink. But this date is nothing compared to my first shidduch date ever (not with this girl) where the shadchan called me to tell me the father wants to talk with me. I said fine. The father called me up after to tell me what a bad impression I made. He said “I didn’t know it was possible to make such a bad impression”. He then gave me some really good pointers and I put them down in a notebook. well you live and learn. Still looking.
is it true that a woman halachically needs her father/husband’s reshus to drink an alcoholic drink in public? vague recollection of learning something like that in high school…
essy8: It isn’t tznius altogether. Even a father/husband can’t authorize public drinking by a woman.
It all depends on the setting. If her drinking shows she’s irresponsible such as if she’s driving (yes, it is possible) or somewhere where you just don’t do it like any public property, where it’s illegal, that would be an automatic “no.” Otherwise, it’s up to how she drinks (moderately is ok, 3 boiler makers is NOT) and how far she lets herself go (the less the better, obviously).
If I were having dinner and it was a glass of wine, I would not think of it in the same way as tossing back a beer or a scotch on the rocks. I don’t think it is a smart move for either boy or girl to order alcoholic beverages, but to each his own.
your logic is interesting
i dont believe however that Chazal made a gzeirah against every behavior that they thought wasnt ok.
“…and she doesn’t drink. …..I don’t really drink either.”
But you (and presumably, mrs Wolf as well) COULD if you needed to, and most likely hold your senses.
Cholent does that to a person.
I don’t think it is a smart move for either boy or girl to order alcoholic beverages, but to each his own.
Why can’t he order a drink for her and vice-versa? 🙂
“i dont believe however that Chazal made a gzeirah against every behavior that they thought wasnt ok.”
If they thought the general population couldn’t handle the g’zeira, they weren’t goizer. Sometimes they would float a trial balloon and if the people could handle the g’zeira, it remained; otherwise, the g’zeira was dropped. Same thing with Kol Korehs issued by chazal today; if the people can’t handle the g’zeira, the issue is dropped.
yes thats one reason they would not make a gezeirah but there are countless more
did they make a gezeirah that someone shouldnt blow his nose onto the street in public? i happened to see that a few days ago.
did they think that is okay.
we know what they thought about people who ate while walking down the street. they are passul from aidus. did they make a gezeirah?
ther must be literally millions of behaviors they did not think was okay but did not goizer.
i think its cool.send me her resume
Mod – If chazal expressed their feelings about a particular trait or behavior, then we know that it’s important and we can react accordingly; otherwise, like you sort of indicated, it’s a subjective opinion and chazal couldn’t care less about blowing your nose into the street. In fact, while I consider it quite disgusting, chazal felt it was ok as long as you rub your shoe over the phlegm.
i think were not understanding each other
thats fine
“what would you do if a women ordered one?”
It depends if I felt she was wasting my time 🙂
B’h–My wife and I enjoy a nice scotch with herring every shabbos.
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.