Home › Forums › Decaffeinated Coffee › women and guys in a not jewish college together
- This topic has 125 replies, 17 voices, and was last updated 8 years, 2 months ago by Sparkly.
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August 30, 2016 2:00 pm at 2:00 pm #1175318SparklyMember
yekke2 – the guy i asked about is a good frum boy who tries not talking to girls he ONLY knows me thru my brother.
August 30, 2016 2:01 pm at 2:01 pm #1175319SparklyMemberlilmod ulelamaid – thank you for knowing what im talking about while others think they know what im saying but ONLY you do! so thanks for that! Thanks for the advice.
August 30, 2016 2:02 pm at 2:02 pm #1175320SparklyMemberyekke2 – what do you mean by rabbi isnt legitimate?
August 30, 2016 3:13 pm at 3:13 pm #1175321Lilmod UlelamaidParticipantSparkly – You’re welcome! And thanks for the positive feedback!!! Appreciation is nice! 🙂
Hatzlacha in all your endeavors!
When the guys do come back, you might want to think of one gvul to set for yourself as a New Year’s Resolution. Make sure it is small and easy enough that you can keep to it.
That’s just a suggestion – do what you feel is best for you.
Hatzlacha with the new semester!
August 30, 2016 5:15 pm at 5:15 pm #1175323ChortkovParticipantSparkly – If he is a nice frum Jewish boy who doesn’t like talking to girls, then do him a favour and don’t talk to him!
Lilmod – Thank you for your wonderful explanations. You do seem to have sensible, practical advice, and we appreciate that. My comments before were not intended as advice; I would never read something like that into somebodys question. I guess I’ve been in the CR long enough to decide [with a healthy dose of cynicism] when a poster truly wants the advice I can give, or when I don’t think its necessary.
August 30, 2016 5:17 pm at 5:17 pm #1175324ChortkovParticipantyekke2 – the guy i asked about is a good frum boy who tries not talking to girls he ONLY knows me thru my brother.
Sparkly – I’m sure you wrote above that a boy can still be frum even if he talks to girls, and that there is nothing wrong with male/female social interaction?
August 30, 2016 5:32 pm at 5:32 pm #1175325Lilmod UlelamaidParticipantyekke2: “Sparkly – I’m sure you wrote above that a boy can still be frum even if he talks to girls, and that there is nothing wrong with male/female social interaction?”
I heard a story about a professor who taught something that contradicted something he had taught 50 years before. When that was pointed out to him, he said, “Good. So I’m a growing person, and I don’t remain stuck where I was 50 years ago.”
Maybe Sparkly doesn’t believe in standing still and she has grown since she wrote the last post.
(yekke2, please take this post the way it is meant and not as a criticism/contradiction to your post)
August 30, 2016 6:52 pm at 6:52 pm #1175326SparklyMemberlilmod ulelamaid – funny part is i saw him at school and he was the one who said hi to me so i said hi back. so he answered the question himself!
August 30, 2016 6:55 pm at 6:55 pm #1175327SparklyMemberyekke2 – he doesnt go around hanging around with girls. his a good frum boy.
August 30, 2016 6:56 pm at 6:56 pm #1175328SparklyMemberAugust 30, 2016 8:13 pm at 8:13 pm #1175329ChortkovParticipantGoodness, why didn’t you say you are ready to marry of him? That does change everything.
Incidentally, it is also assur for a boy who “keeps shomer” to interact socially with girls.
August 30, 2016 8:48 pm at 8:48 pm #1175330Lilmod UlelamaidParticipantSparkly – It’s great that you are looking for a guy who is shomer. Amongst other things, you have a better chance of having a good marriage that way!
August 30, 2016 10:38 pm at 10:38 pm #1175331SparklyMemberlilmod ulelamaid – yes it is! especially since his in a typical yeshiva and technically a typical frum boy but he loves doing stuff that mo boys do without breaking shomer, or hanging out with girls! so its exactly what i need! so its a perfect shidduch!
August 30, 2016 10:39 pm at 10:39 pm #1175332SparklyMemberyekke2 – im waiting for the shadchan to set us up tho unfortunately… and he keeps saying his not ready to get married yet h’h soon he will be and then the shidduch will hopefully work h’h.
August 30, 2016 11:05 pm at 11:05 pm #1175333ChortkovParticipantcan you say hi to a guy that your family friends with at college?
…
especially since his in a typical yeshiva and technically a typical frum boy but he loves doing stuff that mo boys do without breaking shomer, or hanging out with girls!
August 30, 2016 11:22 pm at 11:22 pm #1175334Lilmod UlelamaidParticipantSparkly: “lilmod ulelamaid – yes it is! especially since his in a typical yeshiva and technically a typical frum boy but he loves doing stuff that mo boys do without breaking shomer, or hanging out with girls! so its exactly what i need! so its a perfect shidduch!”
Sounds great! Are we still talking about your brother’s friend whom you wanted to know if you could say hello to?
August 31, 2016 12:04 am at 12:04 am #1175335HappygirlygirlMemberYekke2- I have never spoken to you but from these posts I have to say I loveee your answers and how bluntly you state them. Right on chabibi!!
Sparkly- I’m taking out a point that no one touched upon as of yet. You say that you would want it to be a shidduch for u .that meqns u have feelings for this guy. I don’t think saying hi is assur but you might be doing it in a flirtatious way or trying to Catch his attention being that u like him.
August 31, 2016 1:01 am at 1:01 am #1175336SparklyMemberlilmod ulelamaid – same guy. i did say he didnt talk to girls. so how did he say hi to me if he didnt know me thru my brother and doesnt talk to girls?
August 31, 2016 1:02 am at 1:02 am #1175337SparklyMemberHappygirlygirl – i told someone that i liked him and try to make it NOT obvious that i do and she said that i do a good job at that and that you cant tell that i like him. its as if im some random girl to him. so it is tznius b’h.
August 31, 2016 9:05 am at 9:05 am #1175338ChortkovParticipantHGG – Thank you. I generally try not to be so blunt, but I need to keep the balance here. Lilmoid Ulelameid is one of the nicest posters i’ve seen here, and she seems determined to read the best into everything. Doing so requires taking everything on absolute face value. I’m just balancing things out by reading between the lines a bit, and at times, speaking between the lines…
I think Syag thinks I was too direct, which is bad, because Syag is generally right about these things </sad face>…
August 31, 2016 2:13 pm at 2:13 pm #1175339Lilmod UlelamaidParticipantYekke2: “Lilmoid Ulelameid is one of the nicest posters i’ve seen here”
Thanks! 🙂
August 31, 2016 8:01 pm at 8:01 pm #1175340SparklyMemberwhy are their soooooo many bjj and bnos sarah girls that go to my college?!?! (not being sarcastic) i have a girl from one of those seminaries in my class not saying which class!
August 31, 2016 8:29 pm at 8:29 pm #1175341Lilmod UlelamaidParticipantSparkly – well why are you there? Maybe they are there for the same reasons.
For your sake, I’m glad that there are so many Frum girls in your college. I had thought you were in a goyish out-of-town college, so I hadn’t expected that!
September 1, 2016 12:33 am at 12:33 am #1175342SparklyMemberlilmod ulelamaid – what do you mean by that? that i was bording at a not jewish college? how would that be if i saw a guy who lives at a yeshiva and goes to that yeshiva and goes to my college?!?!
September 1, 2016 12:40 am at 12:40 am #1175343Lilmod UlelamaidParticipantWho said anything about boarding? I thought you lived in an apartment or something.
September 1, 2016 1:03 am at 1:03 am #1175344SparklyMemberlilmod ulelamaid – could be NOT saying where i live ONLY said not boarding at college.
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