"wiggers"

Could you please elaborate about what you learned (“you will be chased by fire”)?

In terms of switching from wearing a wig, you might find it easier to do so gradually. Try wearing a really wide headband like the chassidishe women wear. It covers a large portion of the top of the wig and will allow you to get used to that look. Try to wear a hat fall, also. If the wig hair isn’t too long, and you wear a hat or a tichel on top, revealing only some of the hair, you will get used to that look. Wear earrings also, as you will feel more feminine when you show less hair. I think feeling comfortable with a look has a lot to do with those we see and hang out with. Look for women who wear tichels in a way that you admire. They will be more than happy to show you how to tie it in a really nice way, and you’ll see others who are doing it too.

You can also try wearing a tichel for brief periods of time to get used to it: shabbos, early mornings, etc.

They used to sell something called a pony tail snood. It looks like an extra large barrette with a fabric bag attached to it. You might be able to make one yourself, if you can’t find one. They’re really useful. You can put your hair in a low ponytail, snap the barrette on and put the pony in the bag. Then, plop a deep hat on top, which will fully cover your hair. It’s a pretty decent compromise, looks more up to date, and may help you feel more feminine.

Hello, are you syrian? if so, all of our rabbonim strongly opposed this psak of Hacham Ovadiah.

esthermalka- i did not say they strongly oppose his psaks, i said they strongly oppose THIS psak. Please re-read my orig post.

This question has been posed to numerous syrian gedolim including Hacham Yosef Raful, Hacham Eliezer Harari, Even Hacham Baruch zt’l- and all of them paskened we can wear wigs.

You do not need to do much research on this- go look at what every syrian rov’s wife does- they all wear wigs. Hacham Ovadia is a minority in the sepharsdishe velt on this inyan, and practically speaking, in Halab- they always wore wigs. Such is a known fact that anyone who lived there or had parents that were there can verify for you.

You definitely have very prominent rabbis to rely on. Be that as it may, as I stated previously it is proper and good to have one rabbi who you follow in all areas of halacha.

On the eighth day of Pesach I wear a sheitel, to show it’s only my minhag to usually wear a tichel and that I don’t actually believe it’s wrong to wear a sheitel.

I am very happy to wear a tichel because IMHO, it shows clearly that I’m a member of the club of married Jewish women. It gives me a chance to accessorize my snood to my outfit (ok, usually they are both black but sometimes, you can really make an outfit outstanding by matching that you cannot make with a wig, I mean, do you color match each wig to each outfit?)

and it is easy and comfortable.

hatzlacha

(lubavitch, btw, are makpid to wear wigs exclusively, i think

whoa! not the topic I thought it was gonna be!! whew!

esthermalka- speak to rabbi isaak dwek of deal/lakewood. he is from halab and can personally attest that mostly all rabbis wives (including his mother) covered their hair. see also Hacham Abraham Antebi’s sefer titled “Chochma Umusar” where he chastises the women for their breach in tznius by uncovering their faces in public. He lived in the late 19th and 20th century where he attests they covered their hair.

Just to address you hats issue and Hacham Ovadianiks in the syrian community-I personally sat at the table of Rav Yehuda Moalem zt’l , rosh yeshiva porat yosef and counterpart of Hacham Ovadia, and asked him about wearing hats or tichels at a chasuna, where the majority of people are wearing wigs (i did not specify whether the wigs the women were wearing were better than their own hair, i just said peah nochrit). So he asked me whats the heter to wear a hat in such a case?

If anything, I think the whole reason for Rav Ovadia’s psak is that in boiling hot Halab or Cairo or Baghdad, it was impossible to wear a wig and he never saw them in his community until the recent explosion of human hair shaitlach, some of which really are questionable. Maybe that is what Rav Ovadia means by “chased by fire” – your head would feel like it is on fire if you wore the quality of shaitel that must have been available when he was growing up in Baghdad or when he was a rav in Cairo!

In addition, local Muslim women wore scarves over their heads so that Jewish women found them easier to obtain and completely socially acceptable.

I am actually writing a sefer on the halachos of wearing tin foil hats for men and women. There is a problem because they produce solar energy that can set off rather than protect against the chips that the CIA implants in our heads so that they can monitor the activities of the Jewish community in order to prevent another Pollard scandal.

For women there is also the inyan of how much of the face they have to cover with tinfoil to qualify for proper tznius (which of course is a machloikes between burqa and chador levels of coverage).

kylbdnr: What did you discuss on dates? Why wasn’t this issue covered before?

It was discussed so many times. He said he’d rather I wear a tichel because he says the reason of covering hair is so that ppl should know ur married, but with todays wigs, he can’t tell the difference if someone is covering her hair or not. I told him I told like tichels so he said (in an upset tone) if I wanna wear a wig I can. It’s not a normal thing to break a shidduch for such a silly thing. We’ve been together for 3 years; I can’t just say goodbye because of a tichel.

Does Ovadia Yosef allow a sheitel covered with a hat? Meaning the sheitel is sticking out

I definitely second ursula momish.

Dear Kallah, it sounds like he’s yielding to your will on more than one issue (men’s mikvah thread?). Please go for help together; if he doesn’t want to go, go alone.

Remember this rule, it will serve you well:

He’s the boss!

(From a woman who’s the boss at work and the boss of her children; who breaks lots of rules, but not this one)

just to clarify… R’ Ovadia writes that if he sees she has yiras shamayim in other areas, he does not have to break off the engagement.

covering with a hat/scarf is a beautiful thing, and according to many is an ideal – the woman is sacrificing for Hashem. personally, i’ve been married for five yrs. both sides of the family are all “wiggers” but i wear a hat. i find that if you feel comfortable, pretty, and confident about it, it ceases to be an issue. for a lady to daily be uncomfortable with her appearance is not healthy, and she wont be happy.

R’ Ovadia does write that a lady who works and can’t wear a hat can wear a hat-fall.

good luck!

Sheitals are treif.

The “Kosher ” European Human hair ones are the biggest treif.

There is no way anyone can over see the inspection of this product from beginning to end. And this “European hair” is really actually the same stuff from India, same as before, but they can get away with calling it European hair because its imported and sold to Europe first.

Think. Have you EVER heard of european women growing their hair long in order to make a few dollars and sell/manufacture a wig here or there? THEY DO NOT!

In other words the same Avoda Zara group of people in the temples are still making big money off our gorgeous addiction to wigs.

And to prove it, I can tell you a story first hand. My husband has sri lankens and indians in his factory and off topic one day, he just asks one of them…”Hey have you ever heard of this…selling the women’s hair for wigs”?

and the man answered “Sure its a big custom, sure we offer it to our g-ds in our temple and then they make wigs for your community, thats how ‘your people’ finance our temples.”.

Do you think Rabbonim and the like cannot hear this? And could they do anything about it?

The Satmar Rebbe was against sheitals.

Ursula momish: lubavitch is not particular to only wear wigs except maybe in the street/public.

LuVmyFaM: why not ask your chacham to explain chacham ovadia’s psak as it doesn’t sound very clear to me the way you presented it? (I happen to be connected to the syrian/sephardic world though I am not syrian myself (my uncle’s brother is the chacham of Massachusetts)

😀 Zuberman! 😀

always runs with scissors fast-

Not everybody holds there is a problem with the Indian wigs. My own rav holds there is no problem whatsoever.

As for your “first-hand story,” honestly I’m not quite convinced you aren’t just taking a line from the 2009 film “New York, I Love You”:

“Most human hair in America comes from our temples in India, where women offer their long locks to God, so that they can be sold to the West and you can have your wigs.”

Sounds curiously familiar. I’m not saying you are making up stories, but when an anonymous poster clearly has an agenda and starts telling stories, you can’t help but wonder.

This is why people should cite valid sources for everything they say. At least everything that can in any way be a cause for some people to look down on others.

The husbands minhagim become her minhagim,

I know a couple – sefardi woman, ashkenazi man. She always said a bracha before bentching licht. Her husband wanted her to reverse that. So he asked his Rosh Yeshiva. He was told al pi halacha, he’s right, but al pi shalom bayis let her light however she wants.

I don’t understand why you are bringing this to annonomous people instead of your rav. Who are we and why do you care what we say?

About European Hair, being in the business, I can tell you that SOME of what you say is true BUT NOT all of it. 1) There is no hair collected from Italian anymore but there hair processing is a large industry there. 2)Rav Moshe matir-ed the shaila of Indian Hair many times. 3)Chabad rabbis never assered Indian hair 4) Very long hair is available from Eastern Europe and Brazil 5)An expert can easily tell the difference between European and Indian hair.

Good luck with what ever you decide to do. Taking on a chumra is a good thing if you can stick with it and doesn’t impose on other people. May Hashem help you in your quest for growth.

The Posek HaDor, HaGoan HaRav Shalom Yosef Elyashev shlit”a issued a public psak din that the Indian hair used for shaitels is Avoda Zora.

Most human hair for better shaitlach is imported from Eastern Europe. There are ads on every lamp post where I live offering money for hair according to length, and for longer hair the money is enough to feed a family for a week or two.

Two high-end sheitel manufacturers make their better wigs in Ukraine, one here in this city (it is no secret – Freeda mentions it on her website and she has never used Indian hair nor does she mess around and substitute cheaper hair because it would be the end of her business) and one in another major city.

Always

Be careful how you state things with such conviction. Just because you follow one daiya does not mean it is the accepted daiya. You’re treading on dangerous ground to be a normal person paskening as though you are a Dayan. You make a blanket statement that goes against what many well known rabbanim advise and follow, and state unequivocally that it is the only opinion that counts. You disregard the opinion of many rabbonim. I respect the opinion you cite as a valid opinion, but not the only opinion.

Tomche-

The Posek HaDor…

What is a Posek HaDor?

I mean no disrespect by this question.

The foremost and leading posek of the dor.

Where does this idea come from? And who exactly is it relevant to that this is the “biggest” rabbi, if everyone is supposed to follow their own rabbi anyway?

You haven’t answered my question. Yes, what is the point? (Not rhetorical)

And when I say “where does this come from” I am not looking for a name, I am looking for the source of whatever concept it is supposed to imply.

She is supposed to follow her husband’s minhag on candle lighting and hair covering, just like everything else.

600–Those are good answers in the Ukraine, but they don’t pass in BP. A shaitel (generally) looks neater than some snoods. However, if a chassidishe woman who only wears a shpitzel or a hat-and-horsehair works there, or a woman who prefers to wear a hat and ponytail snood, they have to accept it or they are liable for the same kind of lawsuit that Disney faced regarding religious haircoverings. So they also have to accept a snood-wearer if there is no other reason not to hire her.