how do the husbands cope vis a vis taking care of the house, cooking, taking care of the kids
Those are the easy parts. The bigger issue is going to minyan! The simple solution is to have chulent both for shachris and mincha maariv, and advertise at the local yeshiva. You will have no problems with minyan.
It’s simple: don’t let your wife escape until your oldest daughter can take care of her siblings. I’m sure she’ll understand. Otherwise, follow The Goq’s advice.
make her pay for her week of pleasure by coming home to a pile of laundry on her bed and your bed not made. also buy tea bags. tea bags are good for black eyes.