Why should I go to sem?

OOM: There are a LOT of girls from my school going to Machon Raaya- not going to say how many as it’ll give away where I go. My Pratchettian friend (the only other Pratchettian I know of in my school) wants to go to Michlalah.

The people who are telling me to go (like my parents, my aunts and uncles, my friends- people I trust, even if not all of them know what they’re talking about, cuz I don’t either) tell me I should go because it’s an amazing experience. One of the people I asked is actually a rebbetzin (I didn’t ask her in that capacity, though) whose rebbetzinship means that she’s asked about this a lot- she generally tells people to go and says they usually thank her for it.

My mom tells me to talk to people who have gone to sem. Most people I know of who’ve gone to sem, like my cousins, went to really Bais Yaakovy sems, like BJJ, Bnos Chava, etc. I have nothing against schools like these, except that because of the people I know of who went there I know enough about the schools to say that I don’t think I’m their type.

My issue is that most of the people who are telling me to go because it was an amazing experience only say that because it was amazing for THEM and they loved it and it’s an irreplaceable experience. I haven’t really encountered people who didn’t like it. Maybe that’s a point in favor… But still, that doesn’t really mean that I’D like it as much as they did, or that there’s not some other experience that could be just as life-altering for me.

Anyway, here are my pros and cons so far. If anyone has any comments or additions, I’m all ears.

PROS:

I love Israel and would love to live there for a year. I’ve only been there once, with no plans in the near future to return except for sem.

I don’t want to lose my friends (I’m terrible at keeping in touch) and I would totally want to keep them around.

I love to learn.

Everyone will stop nagging me. (Okay, not REALLY…)

CONS:

I don’t want 13th grade. I don’t want another year of tests, and assignments, and uniform/dress code (though I can bend on that if it’s not TOO bad because I can’t expect everything), I don’t want to be brainwashed- actually, more on that later.

If I go to any college besides Stern or Touro, I lose a year of college (to the best of my knowledge- I’d love to be wrong, even though there ARE some colleges that don’t take outside credits at all). As I’m considering pre-med, that’s a big deal for me.

I have my own views, and I don’t mind sharing them, which doesn’t always endear me to people. It’s more that I have a very out-of-the-box viewpoint and I don’t mind debating people on their views. The argumentativeness is something I’m working on cutting down on, because I’m aware it’s not always very appreciated, but I’ll go bonkers if I sit all year in a bais yaakovish sem trying to let everything go over my head and not say anything, like my mom tells me I should. My head would explode. I want to learn, but I don’t want the learning shoveled into my ear, either, and I don’t want to have to let it all trickle out the other ear or force it to stay in my brain and not be able to ask about it.

I want to be done with mandatory school. I hate programs. I hated being a camper, but I love being a counselor. College is a necessary evil, though it is much freer than my other school environments. I don’t want to go to a seminary that will really restrict me.

I know my cons seem much more than my pros- I really don’t think so, though. They just need more explaining.

So, to sum up, I need (maybe want, but then again we are talking about something I don’t NEED to do, which means why not go for all I can get?) an accepting sem with a lot of freedom, the ability to ask questions, lots of challenging LEARNING (nothing spoon-fed- what’s amazing is learning bechavrusa with a friend and FINALLY figuring out what the meforash is saying- EUREKA!), no uniforms, homework, or tests, very open-minded, fun, and preferably in Yerushalayim :).

Can’t you see the list of those seminaries just growing and growing and growing?…

Ironically enough, my uncle who does sem guidance for a modern school says that he knows of a bunch of schools of the type that I’m probably thinking of, but hashkafically and socially they’re probably not my type.

SO should I just ditch it?

Ohhh- and I don’t want to go specifically for shidduchim. In fac, if someone isn’t going to want me solely because I didn’t go to sem, that says something about him.

My mom says that I’ll probably change my mind later, though, so I’m not axing sem on principle yet.

Torah: Funny thing- my sis says that, and she’s in ninth grade and the only reason why she knows it exists is because I said so. And I didn’t even say anything about it… I’d swear she just pulls this stuff from a hat.

Does it have a dress code? Just OOC… 🙂 What kind of rules and stuff does it have in general?

One thing with me is that I know so many girls who are going there who are such different types that I’m never sure which type is “representative” or whatever, like, I don’t know how many, if any, people will be going there who I’d get along with.

It’s funny- you know how there’s always one neighbor, or cousin, or friend’s friend’s daughter and your mom is always convinced that you are EXACTLY her type and thus you should do whatever she did? Well that girl went to Machon Raaya, so now my mom’s convinced it’s THE ONE. Maybe.

All my friends say I’m a Michlalah “type.” Then again, a bunch of my friends are probably going to Michlalah, so maybe I’ll just hop on the bandwagon with them.

Also, what makes you NOT get accepted to sem? My Hebrew subject grades aren’t always so fantastic, if only because I haven’t exactly meshed with certain teachers for reasons I have alluded to, so would that put me at a lower risk of being accepted? I know Michlalah also has an exam besides for the interview so I’m assuming my grades will be somewhat diluted as a factor- also, Michlalah and my school, without going into too many details, have a very buddy-buddy relationship.

Dumb question- if you bumped my thread, and had also read it, you’d know that I wasn’t so interested in a Bais Yaakov sem.

Why do people bump threads they haven’t read? I’m not saying that you must read every pearl of wisdom I write, but it still just seems a bit silly.

And for those who missed it, I’m happy in the end that I went to sem :). I’m sure you’re all shocked.

sm29: If she wants a BY sem that will help withs hidduchim, BIU is NOT the option.

lookingforsem: You seem to have made up your mind already… if you’re really into those three sems then why not just apply? Bumping long-forgotten posts isn’t really going to help you make a decision if you really need to make one…