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There is no need to ask a question when one knows the answer.
Joseph- “A husband is a rebbe to his wife and children.”
If you have s halachic source for this concept, I’d love to see it. As I said before, you’re right that a wife should ask her husband about family minhagim. But when it comes to halacha, she should either learn the material herself (if its shayach and easy), or ask a rov.
Golfer- I wasnt trying to imply that women (or anyone) should learn instead of asking a shailah. when in doubt, ask a rov (especially if its a time sensitive/complicated matter). and never ever feel ashamed for asking a question!
Don’t worry, zogt-b, I always prefer to ask than to err.
And when I’m not sure if my shayla to the Rav is actually a Shayla for the Rav, I ask my husband** if I should make the call. But if he wasn’t there to help clarify matters, I wouldn’t hesitate. I’ve never had a Rav laugh at me, or answer my questions with anything less than the utmost patience and respect. Even Erev Pesach.
(**I have no problem with ladies asking their husbands for guidance in Halachic matters. I just don’t think it should be institutionalized as the only way to handle matters of this nature.)
Joseph, that was a great post.
Can the Mods tell us if that was a first?
I’ve seen many sources quoted in Halachic discussions here in the CR. The Shulchan Aruch, the Rambam, the Mishna Brura, Rishonim, Achronim, and a vast array of poskim. Sefarim I’ve heard of and others I never have. But this is the first time I’ve seen the CR used as a “SOURCE.”
Congrats, CR!
Seems we’ve been promoted.
As for the original question that led to all of this discussion-
Women like flowers because they’re beautiful and fragile and often smell nice. Women love to nurture. Flowers thrive with care and wilt without, unlike inanimate objects that just sit there oblivious to our care or lack thereof. (But I happen to know a few people who are not women who like flowers too.)
Of course it’s okay for women to ask their husbands. It’s also okay for men to ask their wives.
And where in halacha does it say that it is proper to call a lady “dense”?
RebYidd – I think that needs to be posted on the assumptions thread…check it out.
🙂
Joseph- Thanks for linking to the posts. In the future though, I’d prefer if you could so kindly give precise maareh mekomos to save me the time of scrolling thru dozens of irrelevant comments.
As to the content: If you recall, the question here is about you telling a wife to ask her husband halachic shailahs as opposed to telling her to ask her rov.
I looked at the links you posted and found little that addresses the inyan directly. The sources you (under the names ‘shlishi,’ ‘avhaben,’ et al) brought do say that the wife has to honor her husband a lot. ein hacha nami. But no mekor says that a husband is a “rebbe” to his wife and children, as you put it earlier.
So unless I know for sure that a woman’s husband is a talmid chochom, I would not tell her to ask him a shailah. It’s a bad chazaka to assume all frum baalabatim can pasken. So, I’d advise her to either ask a rov or look it up herself if the shailah is uncomplicated (per rema, she should know it anyway!).
Joseph: Note that I also only asked.
Please do not post comments like this in the coffee room. There are girls and boys here and i do not think it is tznius for boys and girls to talk about this kind of thing. Thank you.
princess leeba, Um, which comments are you referring to?
For the record, I like flowers because they look pretty and smell pretty. (Live flowers, of course; I’ve already expressed my opinions on cut flowers). It’s socially acceptable for women and girls to care about prettiness, but not so much for men to do so. Why that is the case is a separate issue.
Mrs Plony – girls and boys should not talk about flowers together that is not tznius sorry.
What is it about flowers that makes it not tznius sorry?
Princess leeba: Oooookayyy…
Uh, since both boys and girls post on the CR, is there any topic that we can discuss? I think I’ve seen a thread title about getting a mechitza here, but I haven’t actually opened it to look in.
I think that would be a good idea. People need to watch out for their neshamos and that includes not talking to the other gender. This is coming from someone who use to talk to boys so i know what im talking about.
Princess Leeba, why in the world are you coming here and telling people of unspecified gender not to talk to the opposite gender?
Because its a HUGE aveirah that a LOT of frum people unfortunately are dealing with and even in the coffee room where their are mixed genders or just in college, jewish or non jewish their guys! I just want people to learn from a girl who almost went off the derech and talked to guys to not talk to the opposite gender and be good religious Jews.
Okay, I finally got it!
If you give any one (male or female) a ‘thing’ as a gift (like a vase or a picture frame or a stuffed animal) then they might not like it, and then you’re just contributing to their clutter problem. And if you give consumables as a gift (like candy or fruit) then they might not eat it before it spoils or they might not want to gain weight.
But if you give a woman flowers then it’s not going to be clutter because the flowers are going to die soon anyway. And she doesn’t have to force herself to eat some to prove to you that she appreciates the gift.
But if you give a woman flowers then it’s not going to be clutter because the flowers are going to die soon anyway. And she doesn’t have to force herself to eat some to prove to you that she appreciates the gift.
Then give her dandelions.
http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/quotes-2#post-609609
If you give her dandelions, she will have to eat some to prove she appreciates it.
Mw13 -“Then give her dandelions.”
That won’t solve the problem! As you can see – they are edible.
One doesn’t eat dandelion flowers. One eats the leaves.
YY -“One doesn’t eat dandelion flowers.””But if you give a woman flowers then it’s not going to be clutter because the flowers are going to die soon anyway.”
When they wilt, then you can eat the flowers!
The entire plant is edible, though some parts are bitter.
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