Which Rov would you call if you wanted a Rov's slant on a major decision?

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  • #596145
    Ofcourse
    Member

    Which Rov would you call if you wanted a Rov’s slant on a major decision? Which Rov, who is generally available, without middlemen, listens like a father listens to a child and gives advice from the heart and makes the person feel comfortable (doesnt rush him, doesnt tell him how busy he is, doesnt ask the person to identify themselves…). Thats how R’ Avrohom Blumenkrantz A”H used to be. A Rov who treats all Bnai Ysroel almost like a biological child.

    Is there anyone like that these days?

    #757649
    bpt
    Participant

    I’d call my Rov (as should each of us do; call our own Rov).

    There is no difference between a “major” issue, and a “minor” one.

    #757650
    charliehall
    Participant

    agree with bpt

    #757651
    SJSinNYC
    Member

    There is no difference between a “major” issue, and a “minor” one.

    I disagree.

    While my sister holds by a different Rav than I do, if I had a question that I needed an immediate answer to and she told me her Rav said XYZ, I would rely on that (l’kula or l’chumra) for the moment if it were something minor. Minor being something like a simple kashrus issue. I would then ask my Rav what to do at a later date going forward.

    #757652
    Ofcourse
    Member

    bpt,

    If everyone felt like you, there wouldnt have been hundreds or thousands of people calling R’ Blumenkrantz all the time. He wasnt “their Rov” mostly, He was someone they admired immensely who possibly people were drawn to him because they felt He was more available, more sensitive or more knowledgable than their Rov!

    1-There are certain situations where you cant call “your Rov”.

    2-There are people who daven in Shuls with no Rov (Rov passed on and wasnt replaced).

    3-There are those whose Rov is impossible to reach.

    4-Strange as it may sound, there are people who daven in Shuls with Rovs who they look up to, but not enough for specific questions.

    bpt, it’s a big world out there, with lots of different questions and situations, and R Blumenkrantz A”H remarkably, was always available to happily fill many peoples’ needs. Is that a problem?

    #757653
    wanderingchana
    Participant

    I trust my Rav, especially because he won’t hesitate to refer me if I need to speak to someone with more knowledge in a subject that he feels he has.

    #757654
    bpt
    Participant

    Ok, Of course – now let me re-answer. (The 1st time, I was on hold, and was just checking the CR for whats new)

    How to pick a Rov? If I were new to the scene, the 1st thing I’d look for is who do my friends go to? And not so much as, who do they go to for the best heterim, but rather, whose shiur do they go to? Whose shul do they daven in? Does the Rov’s family (spouse, children, ect) mesh with who I am (or am trying to be)?

    Picking a Rov is like picking a route. It gets you to a destination. Its a lot more than just “can I eat this, or how do I kasher that”. Its about how you (and your family) live their life.

    #757655
    apushatayid
    Participant

    Mine.

    #757656

    Everyone must have “his Rov” who is the final arbiter on all shailos.

    #757657
    ZeesKite
    Participant

    Does “our” Rav, HaRav Popa shlit”a take sha’alos?

    #757658
    spiral
    Participant

    Kashrus questions(over the counter medications or other products)I used to ask Rav Blumenkrantz z”l. I don’t think my Rav knows ingredients and products the way he did. I really don’t have anyone now to call when I don’t want to call the Dayan of my shul.

    I once called him with something that did not need a Halachic answer, but needed a Torah’dig and wise approach. I called him and he didn’t know what to say. He told me to call him back in 3-4 days. When I called him back he said he researched the issue in various seforim. What impressed me most is that he spent almost an hour with me on the phone. He told me little stories about people in a similar situation, and how they handled it. He spoke the way one speaks to an auditorium full of people. He gave me so much of his valuable time, and did not sound rushed at all. When I got off the phone I couldn’t believe how patiently he spoke to an anonymous person.

    #757659
    bpt
    Participant

    R Blumenkrantz A”H remarkably, was always available to happily fill many peoples’ needs. Is that a problem?


    Now, on to the rest of your post:

    Tell me about it. But let me respond, one point at a time:

    Thousands of people calling R’ Blumenkrantz all the time.

    Certain situations where you cant call “your Rov”.

    Shuls with no Rov (Rov passed on and wasnt replaced).

    c)That is a recipe for disaster. How can someone function in this world without a Rov? If nothing else, just to get a feel for how he thinks, so you can draw your own conclusions and then decide on a course of action.

    Rov is impossible to reach.

    Shuls with Rovs who they look up to, but not enough for specific questions.

    #757660
    Ofcourse
    Member

    spiral When I got off the phone I couldn’t believe how patiently he spoke to an anonymous person.

    Wow, I had the same feeling exactly! He was the true essence of doing Mitzvos Lishma! A true Eved Hashem! Now all we have to do is discover some other Lamed Vovniks perhaps, to inspire us similarly.

    #757661
    commonsense
    Participant

    of course, I too often called Rabbi Blumenkrantz even erev yom kippur during the seudah hamofskes and never felt like I was inconveniencing him. He truly made himself available, there are very few Rabbonim that are that accessible… BPT, you would be amazed at how many people do not have a Rov they consider their Rov. Mnny people daven at shul because it is local and do not feel a specific kesher to the rov.

    #757662
    Ofcourse
    Member

    Tell me about it. But let me respond, one point at a time:

    Thousands of people calling R’ Blumenkrantz all the time.

    No way! How about what school or camp to send a child to, or somethng along those lines?

    Something tells me that many of his calls, from outside of his Shul, were NOT Kashrus related. All I have to do is bring up the topic among people I dont know well (Simchas I attend) of “I dont have anyone to call since R Blumenkrantz a”h was niftar, I hear of situations just like mine. Not his Shul, not Kashrus related.

    #757663
    cherrybim
    Participant

    There used to be a time when a Rav wasn’t bombarded with all these silly questions because keeping kosher on Pesach was very simple in comparison to what is out there today.

    We won’t mish, but will buy every chazarei product; what hypocrisy!

    While we all agree that Rav Blumenkrantz was a tzadik gamor, many cannot cope with his Pesach chumras.

    #757664
    Ofcourse
    Member

    cherrybim While we all agree that Rav Blumenkrantz was a tzadik gamor, many cannot cope with his Pesach chumras.

    How was he more Machmir than any Chassidish Rebbe or very frum Litvish Rov?

    If you feel it’s too much for you, then you can follow a YU or OU Rov. Whats the problem?

    #757665
    cherrybim
    Participant

    Ofcourse – grow up.

    #757666
    bpt
    Participant

    “you would be amazed at how many people do not have a Rov they consider their Rov….and do not feel a specific kesher to the rov. “

    As I’m amazed at how many people smoke. Not a sudden death, but surely not a healthy way to go thru life.


    “what school or camp to send a child to”

    And this, you would entrust to someone that does not know you / your family / your child on a personal basis? That would be like trusting a shadchan to choose a shidduch for you.

    The only way to reach a determination of this scope (other that ruach hakodesh) is to know the people involved.

    Asey l’cha Rav. Not my idea, but it appears to be a good one!

    #757667
    Ofcourse
    Member

    bpt, Asey l’cha Rav. Not my idea, but it appears to be a good one!

    The first time I spoke to him I was hooked! Had I been able to move to Far Rockaway, I certainly would have chosen him for “Asey l’cha Rav. ” I did meet him personally about a business issue. Just as joyful an experience as the phone conversations. So in effect, I did choose him…

    #757668
    bpt
    Participant

    So in effect, I did choose him…

    That’s good. But unfortunatly, he is no longer as accessible to answer questions as he once was.

    To be fair, many people do continue to “ask questions / seek advise” by drawing from the writings of gedolim that are no longer among us.

    But for the most part, its takes a current godol (or Rov who has had shimush by a rov with more experience) to call the shots based on the facts on the ground. Plus, sometimes, a flesh-and-blood Rov can see an angle that might be missed, by just “going by the books”

    Its what the trade calls the “5th chelek” of Shilchan Oruch

    #757669
    cherrybim
    Participant

    “many people do continue to “ask questions / seek advise” by drawing from the writings of gedolim that are no longer among us.”

    And they also ask questions to a dead Rav on the internet, and get answers from the dead Rav.

    Everyone must have a warm blooded Rav, otherwise, to be your own Rav is very dangerous and will lead you off the proper path. In fact, every Rav has a Rav.

    #757670
    Ofcourse
    Member

    bpt, To be fair, many people do continue to “ask questions / seek advise” by drawing from the writings of gedolim that are no longer among us.

    Not me!!! He was VERY much among the living when I sought his advice. As hard as I try though, I just cant find a “very much among the living” Rov, similar to HIM. With Hashem’s help I will, soon!

    #757671
    bpt
    Participant

    ” I just cant find a Rov, similar to HIM”

    Ofcourse –

    What’s your general hashkofoh?

    There must be someone the CR can suggest that fits your needs. Its not as much about “finding the perfect fit” as it is “growing into the fit”

    I can suggest a few Bklyn Rabbonim, if thats where your at.

    #757672
    Ofcourse
    Member

    BPT, I can suggest a few Bklyn Rabbonim

    Gladly!

    I am in Brooklyn and looking for someone, who similar to R’ Blumenkrantz, who in addition to being a Halachic expert, made ALL people feel like they were his blood relatives and was available to all.

    #757673

    Ofcourse: Rabbi Menachem Friedman, Rov of the Agudah of East 23rd. The same one popa mentioned supports the bochorim discussed on the billboard thread.

    #757674
    bpt
    Participant

    Rabbi Dovid Goldwasser is another consideration. He has a fairly young following, and is very much in tune to the reality on the ground today.

    #757675
    commonsense
    Participant

    cherrybim, i do understand not mishing yet buying products. If you trust a hecsher then you trust that the mashgiach is making sure that all care is taken with the production of the product to make it kosher l’pesach, but you have no way of knowing what is going on in people’s kitchens. Also people have different minhagim when it comes to kashrus (for example, there are very frum people who hold that cooking chicken in an oven does not make the oven fleishigs, and We hold that the oven needs to be cleaned well and burned out after cooking chicken.) and on pesach people like to be extra careful.

    #757676
    eclipse
    Member

    of course…Some people truly leave a VOID when they are gone. I also miss Rabbi Blumenkrantz’s unusual sensitivity.

    #757677
    Ofcourse
    Member

    eclipse, Some people truly leave a VOID when they are gone. I also miss Rabbi Blumenkrantz’s unusual sensitivity.

    True, but I have to have my faith restored that someone similar exists in this Dor. IyH I will.

    #757678
    cherrybim
    Participant

    “cherrybim, i do understand not mishing yet buying products.”

    #757679
    cherrybim
    Participant

    OfCourse – “If you feel it’s too much for you, then you can follow a YU or OU Rov”

    By the way, all chasidish hashgachos are someich on the OU and their Rabbis for their own hashgachos. In fact, recently the Satmar CRC had their mashgichim go to the OU for hashgacha training.

    #757680
    Sister Bear
    Member

    of course – Rabbi Goldwasser is awesome!!!!! He’s not “my Rav” (like my families Rav) but I would feel comfortable asking him anything (and I’m not one of those people who become BFF’s with teachers and all.)

    #757681
    Ofcourse
    Member

    To all fellow CR-mates:

    I said: “If you feel it’s too much for you, then you can follow a YU or OU Rov”

    Cherrybim said: How are you going to get m’chila from thousands of Rabbonim that you were motzi laz on?

    How do I get “m’chila from thousands of Rabbonim that you were (I was) motzi laz on”?

    Help…….

    #757682

    BS”D

    Well, the only time I can ever pick up the phone is after shkia, so I must therefore find an erev rav.

    By the way, all chasidish hashgachos are someich on the OU and their Rabbis for their own hashgachos.

    And the OK (which is chasidish standard except that the Lubavitcher Rebbe told Rabbi Levy to give hechsher on non-CY products). However, for reasons I’d rather not go into here, the CRC-Satmar probably does not work with OK, though Nirbator and Volover do.

    #757683
    eclipse
    Member

    of course,I b”h have a good rav,but I prefer to tell you offline,if you’re interested.I don’t want him to be at “poster mercy”,you know what I mean?

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