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So far we have the following piskei din as far as when a woman needs to cover her hair:
Mishna Brura – from kiddushin
Rav Moshe – from the morning
Rav Shmuel Kaminetzky – from the yichud
Any more?
An unmarried b’ula needs to cover her hair. So if someone wasn’t frum and is a b’ula, when she becomes a BT she must immediately cover her hair (even though she isn’t, and never was, married)?
cherrybim: Can you cite any posek (preferably major but any for now) regarding your contention that some might matir an almana or g’rusha from covering her hair “if it will help her remarry”? Also, if you can, a posek who allows married women to let strange men see her hair in her house.
Rav Yaakov Kaminetzky told me that the woman does NOT have to cover her hair when she goes down the aisle, but someone must be “in position” to quickly cover her hair the moment her chosson finishes saying “Harei At Mikudeshes….” (in other words, she wears it immediately)
“An unmarried b’ula needs to cover her hair.”
I can see two difficulties with this:
a) Women will be discouraged from doing Teshuva; and
b) We do not want an unmarried women’s history publicized.
My wife’s rav told her the next morning.
There can be a number of unfortunate circumstances where m’ikor hadin a woman, whether a BT or always frum, is required to cover her hair altz b’ula. But I doubt there is any heartless Rav who will enforce it.
As for your question concerning a posek; how about Rav Moshe zt’l for starters.
In RSA circles, the kallah covers her hair from the start of the wedding. Not sure why, it was the position of the Rosh Yeshiva, Rabbi Henach Leibowitz zt”l. It appears, however, that the vast majority start covering their hair the morning after the wedding.
I am BT that was married (to a Jew but not in any religious ceremony) before and later got divorced. I asked R’ Shlomo Zalman, ztvk”l a shaila about covering my hair and was told that I do not have to cover it before I married. It is a chumra to cover the hair if not married/divorced with edim.
I got married in Yerushalayim and, according to the minhag here, covered my hair before the chuppah. It was simply easier to put a shaitel on before the chuppah and have everything ready rather than doing it in the cheder yichud. I have seen kallos from chassidishe mishpochos with their special sequined tichels for after cheder yichud and I also saw a kallah who kept the covering on over her hair (showing only her face after the chuppah) and put a shaitel on in cheder yichud.
Okay, so now we have Rav Yaakov Kaminetzky paskening like the Mishna Brurua.
As far as b’ula being required to cover her hair but a rov wouldn’t be so “heartless” to enforce following halacha, that doesn’t cut it. We don’t throw out halachas because one feels the halacha in “heartless”. Note, I am not saying there isn’t legitimate heteirim, but that can’t be it. In fact another poster above said she was actually *married* before she became a BT and Rav Shlomo Zalman said she could still leave her hair uncovered, even though not only was she a b’ula but she was actually previously married — albeit without kiddushin. So perhaps there are shittos that don’t hold of any halacha that purportedly requires a b’ula to cover her hair?
And does Rav Moshe address the issue of almanas and g’rusha’s covering their hair in the Igros Moshe? Or where does he, or other poskim, address it.
Shlishi: IIRC, it is the difference between Das Moshe and Yehudis, one which is Minhag (and can be bent if needed) and one Halacha (Don’t remember which, perhpas someone else could help?)
gavra: Are you referring to the b’ula question or the almana/g’rusha question?
Shlishi: Both, as they would seem to be the same issue.
How would there be a difference between an almana/g’rusha/b’ula and an eishes ish, as far as whether it is Das Moshe or Das Yehudis?
Shlishi: See Igros 4:32:4.
I’m not sure if that is what Rav Moshe is refering to, but the concept applies either way.
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