What to put on shidduch resume?

The primary point from Rav Shach, that he was conveying to the girls with his response, is that family matters are more important for a girl than mastering Tanach and meforshim.

That is also the lesson intended to be conveyed when people retell this story.

As I pointed out in another thread, people put their own interpretations into stories and just like the details are changed, often the exact words and expressions are twisted around to make different points. I have often heard the same Gadol story told in more than one way, giving over a completely different message. This is often the case even when the details are the same.

I think that is definitely the case with this story.

lilmod, the Litvishe Gedolim have mentioned that the BY movement has often overstepped their bounds in the emphasis on Meforshim, sometimes crossing the line into things that may not be learned per the halacha it is prohibited to teach girls Torah shebal peh. Rav Shach writes in one of his letters that teaching girls Meforshim in depth would be assur because of this, (the problem is quantifying “in depth”, which makes it easy to rationalize). It is not the Gedolei Yisroel that created the curriculum that they use today in BY. And not all Gedolim agreed with the BY movement altogether; the Hungarian Rabbonim objected to the teaching of Rashi to girls (and certainly Rambans and Maharals) on the basis that it constitutes Torah shebal peh. Others said that since Rashi merely explains the pshuto shel mikrah – the simple meaning of the text, it would be considered Torah shebiksav in this sense.

Some girls who attend high-end BY schools have serious questions about basic Judaism, are confused about their commitment to religion, and possess precious little knowledge of Yesodiei Hayahadus. Aish HaTorah’s Project Chazon became wildly popular in the BY schools by virtue of the fact that they come in and teach basic emunah – the basics of the basics, like Hashem exists, Judaism is the only correct religion, etc. – and the students lap up the material like malnourished children. This is the material that was previously used for beginner baalei teshuva that was imported into the BY’s. And they need to import it because they are not equipped to provide it themselves.

But some of these same girls, who, if you were to ask them why Hashem cares if they’re frum, and will tell you they have no inkling, can successfully tell you the different opinions of how the Egel was formed, which Korbonos were brought for which aveiros, and whether the tzefardeah were frogs or alligators. To the point where Roshei Yeshiva have endorsed that someone trained to educate beginning Baalei Teshuva should be invited to these high-end BY schools and teach the girls why they must be frum. What’s wrong with this picture?

The important thing is that once she’s married, if her husband wants her to learn how to make potato kugel, she will do so. And she will do so because she wants to make him happy and not for any other reason.

But, if it’s important for her to learn Ramban, he should also make sure that she has the opportunity to do so. And if he does, the potato kugel will probably taste better!

apy, see my last (three paragraph) comment above.

Mammele – I saw it but didn’t respond because it would have taken too long, and I didn’t have time. Basically, you misunderstood what I meant, so your comments were irrelevant. I wasn’t talking about anything specific. There may have been some resumes that I came across on websites years ago which were poorly written. I’m not talking about a misspelled word or two, but about guys who were clearly inarticulate and stupid – guys who clearly were not Talmidei Chachamim. When you constantly see hundreds of resumes floating around cyberspace, it makes sense to choose to look into only those that sound reasonable based on the resume.

The point about the guy who misspelled intelligent was just that I thought that it was funny – l’maaseh, it could have a typo, but it was still funny.