Home › Forums › Decaffeinated Coffee › Were we all Sephardic once?
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March 4, 2014 7:53 am at 7:53 am #1006925SoftwordsParticipant
CR10 – “I always thought Padam Aram was in Syria” maybe you’re right.
However, your general premiss is wrong. Respect and Ahavat Chinum have to come through seeing each others greatness regardless of any personal ties. Each part of Klal Yisrael has something that we can all admire. To like Sefardim because my mom’s Sefardi is not the proper reason. It’s nature to like yourself. A “pale” white Chossid from Poland has to love a “dark dark” Sefardi from Egypt purely because he’s a Jew!
March 4, 2014 3:22 pm at 3:22 pm #1006926NaftushMemberFensterz asks, “Would your society or clan consider a shidduch with a Skvere Chosid? Would you have considered marrying a Klausenberger girl? Could you easily see your sister or daughter marrying a Teimani or someone from Bobov?” Answer: my society is full of wonderful observant couples from all backgrounds with the probable exception of Skvere. As for me, I was very fluid in my shidduch days and my benefactors indeed set me up with people of many backgrounds and ethnicities. Were they wrong in thinking that I was looking to marry a person and not a group? As for maintaining the Ashkenazi-Sephardi schism, I repeat my opinion: the two populations are amazingly, miraculously similar. It’s hard for me to imagine someone having a real issue about remaining seated vs. standing during Kaddish, and not solving it by asking a simple shaila.
March 4, 2014 4:23 pm at 4:23 pm #1006927HaLeiViParticipantMazal, actually the Spanish communities stayed separate in Europe, at least a large part of them.
March 4, 2014 5:19 pm at 5:19 pm #1006928CR10MemberMazal77, I am not “beating up” on the Ashkenazim. I have Ashkenazi family who come to my home for every holiday. What I am asking for is the following:
1. That shidduch organizations be open to every yeshivish Jew.
2. That yeshivish Askenazim be more open-minded and inclusive of other yeshivish people of different cultures.
3. That yeshivish Ashkenazim not have any preconceived ideas about Sephardim. Check us out first before throwing us out of your organizations and schools(I have had unbelievable problems there, too).
The point of this post is to prove our oneness.
AM ECHAD B’LEV ECHAD
March 4, 2014 9:49 pm at 9:49 pm #1006929wallflowerParticipantWhat is this Sephardi mentality that everyone is always talking about. I’m not saying there isn’t one, but could somebody please break it down for me?
March 5, 2014 12:36 am at 12:36 am #1006930MDGParticipant“Were we all Sephardic once?”
I don’t know if Little Froggie is Sephardic, but I think s/he is tSefardaic.
March 5, 2014 1:21 am at 1:21 am #1006931MDGParticipant“What is this Sephardi mentality that everyone is always talking about. I’m not saying there isn’t one, but could somebody please break it down for me? “
CR10 put it simply: “AM ECHAD B’LEV ECHAD”
Sephardic connection to Hashem is more emotional (some may call spiritual). Sephardim are more into unity and Simcha.
Ashkanazim are more intellectual in their approach to Hashem and religion. Even when being apikorsim, they create an intellectual approach, like Reform. A non-religious Sephardi does what he does. BTW Sephardim can live with more contradictions in life, including on Shul for frum and frei. Intellectualism comes with more individualism – I think on my own.
March 5, 2014 2:17 am at 2:17 am #1006932CR10MemberMDG, that is one of the preconceived ideas that people have about Sephardic mentality. I came to frumkeit only through intellectual thought. After studying Judaism in depth, I discovered that it is completely true. There are also no contradictions in our life. We live a yeshivish life, nothing less and nothing more. No changes. Orthodox shuls only. We also think on our own as Sephardic Jews so that does not define a Sephardi at all, but it does define the preconceived idea of a Sephardi which is what I am trying to eradicate.
March 5, 2014 5:27 am at 5:27 am #1006933MDGParticipantI did not say that one way was the only way for either one. I said “more into” a certain way. Beside which there are sources for much of what I said.
As far as being more happy, that is a Halacha. See Rema on Birkat Cohanim siman 128:44. Ashkenazim don’t do birkat cohanim daily because they are not happy.
Another reason given why Ashkenazim don’t do birkat cohanim daily is because they are less unified. They don’t have a shaliah tsibbur read everything out loud to unify them. A Cohen can’t select to whom he blesses. The bracha (Asher kid’shanu bikdushato shel Aharon vitsivanu levarech et amo yisrael b’ahava) states that he blesses Am Yisrael – collectively.
The Meshech Chochmah points out that the mitsvah of Hakhel is after a Sh’mita year for a reason. During Sh’mita people focused less on gashmiut and more on learning, and they were better able to come together. One of the main things, if not the main thing, that separates people is striving for wealth. The Rema mentioned above explains that Ashkenazim are not happy because they are worried about their livelihood.
The Chida (don’t have the reference now) says that Ashkenazim are more into Gevura, whereas Sephardim are more into Chessed. He points out that they needed the Gevura to withstand Bnai Esav.
Askenazim are the ones who have broken off into various philosophical groups: Reform, Conservative, etc…
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“We live a yeshivish life, nothing less and nothing more. No changes. Orthodox shuls only. “
I didn’t say you don’t keep everything, but in many Sephardic shuls, you have a mix and it’s accepted that way. Not that we prefer it that way. In one Shul that I have attended, I saw a Sephardic Mashgiah of a charaidi Yeshiva visiting from Yerushalayim happily sitting next to his mechallel Shabbat befarhesia cousin. I find it difficult to beleive that would happen in an Ashkenazic shul.
March 5, 2014 4:51 pm at 4:51 pm #1006934apushatayidParticipant“I find it difficult to beleive that would happen in an Ashkenazic shul.”
I find it difficult to believe that it happens in an ashkenazic shul. He should follow the derech of this “sephardic mashgiach of a charedi yeshiva” and try to be close to his mechallel shabbos cousin, so he could try and influence him to once again keep shabbos. by simply cutting ties with him, he is basicly saying, get lost, go be mechallel shabbos I dont care. this mashgiach has it right.
March 5, 2014 11:16 pm at 11:16 pm #1006935SoftwordsParticipantCR10 – you wrote, “2. That yeshivish Askenazim be more open-minded and inclusive of other yeshivish people of different cultures.”
I don’t know why that is, but I’ve noticed that too. Sephardim are much more comfortable amongst Askenazim (I.E. Shuls and Yeshivas) than Askenazim are amongst Sephardim (Shuls and Yeshivas).
Sorry, I can’t explain it! Maybe someone else knows why. 😐
March 6, 2014 11:47 pm at 11:47 pm #1006936wallflowerParticipantAnswer: Because Sephardim are the minority and have had to learn to integrate into a majority society. Ashkenazim hold such a lopsided majority (at least in the US) that your average Ashkenazi doesn’t really need to know how to fit into a Sephardi environment.
March 7, 2014 4:26 am at 4:26 am #1006937MDGParticipant“Sephardim are much more comfortable amongst Askenazim (I.E. Shuls and Yeshivas) than Askenazim are amongst Sephardim (Shuls and Yeshivas).”
I have mentioned a few personality issues above that help to make it that way.
March 7, 2014 4:58 am at 4:58 am #1006938HaLeiViParticipantAre you implying that the Ashkenazim are more welcoming?
I agree with Wallflower. Ashkenazim run most Shuls and Yeshivos. Part of getting used to America is getting used to our Shuls. An Ashkenazi rarely enters Sfardic Shuls, and feels lost.
At one point I Davenned Mincha in a Sfardic Shul. I didn’t know of their Minhag (that the Beis Yosef alludes to but didn’t like) of the short Shmone Esrei. Obviously, I was out of place.
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