Home › Forums › Local & Neighborhood Issues › Want to move from out of town community to New York…
- This topic has 93 replies, 21 voices, and was last updated 11 years, 8 months ago by snowbunny3318.
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March 12, 2013 3:17 pm at 3:17 pm #608568snowbunny3318Member
Hi! I am flying to NY next week and after pesach, I need to return to my hometown in the midwest, but due to a bunch of accumulated life issues in the community that I grew up in, I want to move to NY, but I need to find a place with cheap rental and I need a job before I move there, any ideas?
March 12, 2013 3:39 pm at 3:39 pm #936411zahavasdadParticipantThe only thing cheap in NY is a Box on 13th Ave in Borough Park and even that will cost ya
Sarcasm aside NY is NOT Cheap
March 12, 2013 3:47 pm at 3:47 pm #936412shnitzyMemberDo you have any talents/ specialize in anything?
Good to hear you’re home in one piece! 🙂
March 12, 2013 3:56 pm at 3:56 pm #936413snowbunny3318MemberI am not home yet… in terms of talents, I am really good at writing, I have had over the course of my high school years, two different marketing summer jobs (telemarketing, and soliciting), my mom taught me how to clean a house like a cleaning lady does, I know how to mow the lawn…
ZD: I know NY is not cheap, but at my age, I would end up having room mates… and also it is not cheap, which is why I would need a job before I would move.
March 12, 2013 4:02 pm at 4:02 pm #936414shnitzyMemberWell, at this time of year, cleaning ladies are always welcome ;)…maybe link up with an agency..
As for your writing and other talents do you have any concrete qualifications?
March 12, 2013 4:06 pm at 4:06 pm #936415zahavasdadParticipantWhat is your Approx Budget?
In general Mowing the lawn is kinda useless in Brooklyn nobody has a lawn
March 12, 2013 4:10 pm at 4:10 pm #936416zahavasdadParticipantJMO
Get a job in Chicago FIRST and work for at least a year and save some money, then contemplate moving to NY with at least 6 month savings.
Jobs are available in NY, but they arent easy to get
March 12, 2013 4:10 pm at 4:10 pm #936417rebdonielMemberI know that for someone new to observance, you want your life to be dramatically and radically transformed.
You need the means to build the life you ultimately want to live.
That being said, unless you want to be on welfare and a burden to taxpayers who go out and work every day, you need a good parnassa and a good career. First and foremost, you need a steady income and a good education to get you that income, which can only come from a limited number of professions in today’s job market.
It works like Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs.
First, you need material needs to satisfy spiritual ones. The gemara makes a similar point; it says that people who work during the week will eat on Shabbat. There is a a need for hishtadlut.
Try to shteig as much as you can while in the pursuit of an education. If you have to find a part time job to get through school, do that. But, without a career or a wealthy secular relative looking to finance you, paying rent might as well be a pipedream.
Once you have a degree, you can address things like seminary, shidduchim, etc.
March 12, 2013 4:16 pm at 4:16 pm #936418a maminParticipantI think you need to be in New York to go on interviews before actually getting the job.
March 12, 2013 4:47 pm at 4:47 pm #936419snowbunny3318Memberright… I can’t afford to go to college…
In terms of concrete qualifications, I have experience with microsoft office, I am very good at office related tasks, I have written a number of research papers, but beyond that, not much.
March 12, 2013 5:06 pm at 5:06 pm #936420MDGParticipantMaybe try living in a place like Passaic. It’s cheaper than NY, close by, has a singles community, etc.
March 12, 2013 5:11 pm at 5:11 pm #936421snowbunny3318MemberOk, but I would still need a job. In terms of paying for rent and stuff like that, I am sure I could find friends who need roommates and then be able to contribute to part of the cost of rent…
March 12, 2013 5:20 pm at 5:20 pm #936422snowbunny3318MemberSo I just got an e-mail back from someone in flatbush telling me to call them when I get to new york… that means I might have a job…
March 12, 2013 5:31 pm at 5:31 pm #936423zahavasdadParticipantYou need to have a few month rent saved up for an apartment you need a security deposit
Plus you will need money for food and other expenses
March 12, 2013 5:38 pm at 5:38 pm #936424sw33tMemberit is expensive, even with roomates. (personal experience)
also, beware of job scams. (there are A LOT out there, specifically in NY)
I agree with everyone who says, try to save up some money first, build a cushion, and then come to new york. I know it sounds awful but its the best way.
March 12, 2013 5:49 pm at 5:49 pm #936425snowbunny3318MemberI found the possible job through parnassah network. Also, I understand that, however, I have a feeling that I can borrow the security deposit from my mom and pay her back…
March 12, 2013 6:52 pm at 6:52 pm #936426yaakov doeParticipantI suggest that you look in the Jewish Press where there are usually ads for telemarketing for tzdakas and basement apartment shares. If you’re in Brooklyn you may benefit from the programs and community at Ohr Nava.
Everything is very excpensive in NYC so don’t be shocked.
March 12, 2013 7:48 pm at 7:48 pm #936427snowbunny3318MemberI already knew that, but I am assuming that I would also end up making more money if I work in NY.
March 13, 2013 12:16 am at 12:16 am #936428nannyMemberHow much are you willing to spend?
Maybe you could just find a family you could board by?
March 13, 2013 12:27 am at 12:27 am #936429Torah613TorahParticipantEverything is extremely expensive compared to out of town. You need to have a plan before you come, so it’s good to start early.
Your best bet is finding a place to board, where you pay minimal rent in exchange for helping out around the house or babysitting the kids, and preferably eat with the family. I know some people who have done that.
There are very few well-paying jobs right now, even minimal wage jobs.
March 13, 2013 12:40 am at 12:40 am #936430snowbunny3318MemberGot it, I was considering that as an option as well. My budget for monthly rentals is self imposed at $400 there are probably people who are looking for roommates who only need that much for rental of the apartment, but also then I would have to provide my own food. I don’t keep Chalav Yisrael in the states, so that makes things a bit cheaper…
March 13, 2013 12:46 am at 12:46 am #936431nannyMemberIs this for next year? You might be able to find an assistants job in an office maybe in Manhattan or something.
March 13, 2013 12:49 am at 12:49 am #936432snowbunny3318Memberits for after pesach… I am stuck cutting my year in seminary short because it ended up completely flopping.
March 13, 2013 1:40 am at 1:40 am #936433nannyMemberI’m so sorry! 🙁
I know someone who takes girls in a lot. I can ask her if you want.
We do not post contact information for individuals.
March 13, 2013 1:44 am at 1:44 am #936434snowbunny3318Memberthat would be awesome!
March 13, 2013 2:02 am at 2:02 am #936435zahavasdadParticipant$400 a month is kinda tough
I think the only way it will work at that price is the Boarding option which I dont really recommend. I know who tried it and failed
March 13, 2013 2:07 am at 2:07 am #936436snowbunny3318Membernanny, since you are not going to be able to post the contact information of anyone, maybe if i knew the gematria of the person’s last name, i could look it up in a community directory when i get to new york…
no identifying info will be posted
March 13, 2013 2:09 am at 2:09 am #936437charliehallParticipantPeople who don’t live in NYC are shocked when they discover how expensive things are here. Salaries in many fields are higher, but not high enough to offset the higher cost of living.
And few employers will recruit from out of the area — why should they, as there are so many good potential employees here. Unless you have really unusual skills in a high demand profession you will probably need to pay your own way to interview here.
There aren’t many inexpensive Jewish neighborhoods in NYC. Try Pelham Parkway or Kingsbridge in the Bronx. The latter is walkable to Riverdale and close to the subway. The former is offering bribes to people to move into the area. So is Mount Vernon, in Westchester county.
Good luck!
March 13, 2013 2:14 am at 2:14 am #936438snowbunny3318Member*I am planning on trying to set up job interviews for next week because i will be in nyc staying by people from sunday night until the day after pesach…
March 13, 2013 2:29 am at 2:29 am #936439zahavasdadParticipantI speak for myself when I say I wish you hatzlacha, Id rather you know the truth before you come without being starry eyed than come starry eyed and fail
March 13, 2013 2:48 am at 2:48 am #936440snowbunny3318Memberi hear. and thank you for reminding me about that.
March 13, 2013 2:50 am at 2:50 am #936441sarahEMemberNew here to posting but.. I did the same thing 20 yrs. ago. Jewish Press, basement apartment Boro Park. Also, from the midwest. After 20 years back in Midwest unfortunately. Nonetheless..once in a while I’ve seen a sublet in BP, now one in Williamsburg, not sure the street on sublet for 500 month, not sure if I would trust sublet. Best to try to stay w/friends, make friends. Try Maimonides Hospital..if you can go back really quick for a job interview, or before you go get a cheap tracfone with a brooklyn or NY number, (718 etc) where employers can call you, with an established NY #..I always lived in BP. Retail on 13th ave might be good but may not be hiring right now too much before Pesach…..problem with any retail is they want you to work on Shabbos, required, unless you may be are around 13th ave.., also secretarial jobs try Hamodia..check on line. Hope that helps. Hatzlacha..
March 13, 2013 2:53 am at 2:53 am #936442snowbunny3318Memberthank you!
March 13, 2013 3:00 am at 3:00 am #936443yehudayonaParticipantWhile most things are expensive in NYC (especially housing), there’s one thing that’s cheaper than almost anywhere else: kosher food.
Have you considered a less expensive community that’s away from home? Baltimore comes to mind.
March 13, 2013 3:11 am at 3:11 am #936445sarahEMemberWhy would she go to Baltimore? funny..I remember…it was NY or nothing..also, maybe BP is too much of a change..I got my first job from the Lincoln Square Synagogue Bulletin Board on the Upper West Side.., I think now it’s all on line and one has to sign up or something. Still around Pesach..difficult to find work..I’d also make sure to try all the hospitals..most of it is all on line anyway..do this before you go. Very difficult though without a NY address..and not living there. I tried it..it didn’t work for me. Faith in the Heaven’s above helped too…the most.
March 13, 2013 3:13 am at 3:13 am #936446snowbunny3318Memberi could look into it, but one of the things that is attractive to me about new york is the amount of schools i could send my children to…
March 13, 2013 3:24 am at 3:24 am #936447sarahEMemberBetween you and me..and the world..shidduchim may be our only hope, who knows what plans are in the making…things will work out..
March 13, 2013 3:30 am at 3:30 am #936448nannyMembersnowbunny- my past post didn’t go thru, but I will try to let you know.
March 13, 2013 3:36 am at 3:36 am #936449snowbunny3318Memberi hear, I actually donated some maser money so that gedolim could daven at the Kosel for 40 days for a shidduch for me, my mom, and a bunch of other things for my mom, brother and i.
March 13, 2013 3:53 am at 3:53 am #936450sarahEMemberhttp://www.shalombayit.net/brooklyn_queens_rentals.html Not sure how current they are…..yes…I was just in Jerusalem, G”W moving there in October… I’ll be davening there at least that long..all the best to you…Chag Sameach
March 13, 2013 4:32 am at 4:32 am #936451rebdonielMembersarahE,
Most men, myself included, do not want to marry women who lack professional ambitions. In order to sustain a quality lifestyle, you need two incomes.
March 13, 2013 12:47 pm at 12:47 pm #936452popa_bar_abbaParticipantFrankly, I know you haven’t told us why you don’t want to stay in Chicago, but I’m thinking you really should rethink it. Striking out on your own is really hard at your age, and you really need to be thinking longer term–not just scraping by.
March 13, 2013 1:23 pm at 1:23 pm #936453sarahEMemberAlso sholom bayis in the home sometimes. But supporting the NY lifestyle/and just food on the table meant up at 5am, home at 7:30 for 18 years,and a long commute. Women can be over ambitious sometimes..and not have time for anything else especially in NYC. My only regret in NYC. I took an early retirement, so b”h have a small income. And can think about me now. Unfortunately happens all too often in NY. Also understanding a lot of women work and are the main source of income in the household…bless those that can do all they do…
March 13, 2013 1:41 pm at 1:41 pm #936454danielaParticipantNYC is expensive, and is also not necessarily the most welcoming place (that is a huge understatement). I do see your point, you need a shidduch, you are out of the ordinary, you need a large community to find one.
On the other hand, it is very hard to imagine how you would get by comfortably. And you’ve had more than enough stress lately.
You are 19 if I recall well? I was not supporting myself at 19, although I was not a dead weight either. The $400 per month is what your family is willing to contribute, or would you have to earn those? As well as earning more money for food and other basic expenses?
Also, I have to say, if you are thirsty and feel like having a beer – it’s a mitzva to destroy chometz – this is forbidden. On the other hand, if you sign something, or if you make the tiniest mistake of all sort, driving accident etc. the law will hit you with full force, and if you can’t afford good legal defense, the law will hit you even harder – this has happened to *victims* of a scam, to people unaware of some law, all sort of innocent people who find themselves in a nightmare. It is not easy to be an adult like that, in a city like NY, alone.
Do you have any relative in the area? Can your rabbi suggest someone or something? Also, can the rabbi address the problem of your “debt” and negotiate with those people? I think he should be negotiating some money for you to get a fresh start, too. And I think this should be a priority and you should mention it every time you call.
Did you consider NJ at least temporarily? There, homes are actually big enough for people to wish for a cleaning person. I think you might also consider offering help right now, before Pesach, and get some extra money – not everyone gets caught in last-minute cleaning but some do, and are very happy to find help and pay for it. Try to give references, offer to show your passport to be copied and the like, because there are many dishonest “cleaners” who clean up the house instead of the dirt.
Be Hatzlacha
March 13, 2013 1:44 pm at 1:44 pm #936455sarahEMemberShe’s in Chicago, I didn’t read that. There’s a nice community there..that’s not “midwest” to me. PBA, there may be other reasons she would prefer somewhere else. I would have felt blessed to have been in a such a nice community in Chicago. And RD, there’s nothing wrong with a woman wanting to stay home, raise children and the many blessings attached to that…..unfortunately there are too many men that think like you do…it’s nice to be blessed to have this option, but shouldn’t be a requirement.
March 13, 2013 2:41 pm at 2:41 pm #936456snowbunny3318MemberI would love to go to college, the only problem is that I can’t afford to do that. I have so many potential options open for next year, there is new york, if I raise enough money, I can go to chedvas, I could stay in my home town and do nothing other than cleaning my house and telecommute for work online. I don’t know what I am leaning towards at the moment.
If I make aliyah, then I can get my Bachelors for free, but then I would have to pay the rest of my living expenses, the aliyah benefits only last for so long.
Things are a bit more complicated for me because I also have learning differences, and money issues and a complicated situation.
I know pretty much nothing about the tri- state area. I would have to earn that money. Most of my tri-state connections are in New York…
March 13, 2013 2:45 pm at 2:45 pm #936457zahavasdadParticipantSB
I dont know about Chicago, but in NY Community Colleges are public universities are cheap.
Id be willing to be that community colleges are cheap in Chicago too
Have you considered this idea. Also many community colleges realize many of the students there arent wealthy and will help you get a part time job to help pay for it
March 13, 2013 3:17 pm at 3:17 pm #936458snowbunny3318Memberi was thinking of going to brooklyn college part time, but work full time (so I would end up taking night classes, like one or two classes a semester and even summer school so that I would at least be able to work towards a degree…)
Also, there are many logistical issues with me going to college in my home town such as not having a car to drive or access to public transportation.
March 13, 2013 3:26 pm at 3:26 pm #936459🍫Syag LchochmaParticipantcommunity colleges are cheap if you live in district. If you live on your own you may qualify for financial assistance since you would be in the low income bracket.It’s usually enough to cover tuition in local places. Some girls in Chicago are doing online classes or skyping programs in NY that aren’t offerred here.
March 13, 2013 3:27 pm at 3:27 pm #936460zahavasdadParticipantBrooklyn College is not easy to get into anymore. Because its cheap alot of people want to go there
You would more likely have to attend Kingsborough Community College first which is a bit harder to get to without a car (You have to take a Bus after the Subway)
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