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Can anyone give Syag some creative, effective, but non-abusive methods for waking up her boys whe the alarm clocks don’t work? 🙂
As a point of reference; I pull off their blankets, rub their heads, tickle their feet, yell, “It’s TIME TO WAKE UP” REALLY loud in their faces, and sometimes I pull their legs to the edge of the bed and swing them over the side if they are positioned right. None of this elicits a response. I won’t do water on their heads but I have considered sticking them with sharp objects and then changed my mind.
Your ideas are great! Why do you need more?
But I’ll just add that I like getting woken up by my phone alarm that sings a calming song. I know its kinda like an alarm clock, and you specifically don’t want that, but I think beeping is not akay, but music is nice to get woken up with.
If you turn it into a fight, they’ll fight back. It is important to treat them honorably enough and speak to them, not in a denigrating manner. Engage them in a conversation, if possible.
When I was a kid/teen, my father would open my bedroom door and let the dog into the room. The dog would jump on my bed and lick my face until I sat up. Worked like a charm.
When we lived in the states, my rule was we left at 7:28 for school; if a kid wasn’t in the car then she was responsible for getting herself to school. In Israel, the rule was if a kid missed the bus then she had to tremp, as we don’t have a car.
My mom A”H used to sing roll out the barrels nothing got me out of bed faster.
i do like syag does. For one kid it works. the other one sometimes just needs to be taken out(or threatend to be taken out)of bed. and hes heavyyyyyyyyy. It can be very frustrating at times. but it has to be done….
That’s the easiest question ever 🙂 You should ask them, before they go to sleep, how they would like to be woken up in the morning. If you forget to ask, pick at random one of the methods they usually suggest. I am afraid all methods border on the abusive, otherwise they would not work…
I know that many people here don’t like this idea, but in my sons’ school, if a boy came late too often, they confiscated his shoes. [i’ve mentioned the idea elsewhere in the CR.] It definitely makes them desperate to get to school on time.
I have also mentioned the idea, but I don’t think that it is either suitable or practical …
This thread should have been named PRACTICAL ideas to wake up kids
I know that many people here don’t like this idea, but in my sons’ school, if a boy came late too often, they confiscated his shoes. [i’ve mentioned the idea elsewhere in the CR.] It definitely makes them desperate to get to school on time.
In my kids school, if the kids come late, the first time they cut off their hands, and the second time they kill them. It definitely makes them desperate to come to school on time.
After a while, all the late coming kids are killed, and then only the kids who come on time are left, and the problem is solved!!
(This post has two points. Only a select few will figure both out. I originally explained here, but then felt guilty for doing so, so I edited it out.)
HaLeivi – you are EXACTLY right. Which is why I am stuck. NONE of theses things work but I don’t want to do anything harsher. They are not ignoring me, they don’t even know why it doesn’t work and sometimes they will come to me in the morning and ask me why I didn’t wake them. And for the record, the alarm clock we use is called Sonic Boom. Google it if you never heard of it. It wakes the neighbors but everyone in the room still sleeps.
This is especially hard for me because I never believed in waking up anyone, not even my infants and babies.
You gotta wake your kids up with a smile and keep things happy. Shouting at them will just put both of you in a bad mood.
I open the curtains smiling and jokily, waking up the kids with a smile on their faces. Even if they are grumpy, keep on being happy and smiley.
if they insists on staying in bed, take the covers off them and stand them up, still joking and saying funny stuff.
It works!
How old are these kids? Because after a certain age it is THEIR responsibility to get up on time, not yours. The best thing is to give them the alarm clock and place it far away from the bed so they have to get up to turn it off. It should be an alarm clock with an annoying tune, it doesn’t matter so much how loud it is. Then, explain that it you will no longer be waking them up every morning, and that it is their responsibility to get to school on time. If they miss the bus or their ride, they’ll have to figure out how to get to school themselves. After one day of missing the bus,(if you don’t cave in and drive them to school yourself) they’ll get up on time.
I know you didn’t want alarm clock ideas, but believe me this works.
“They don’t even know why it does not work”. Obvious why! Because they are still tired. But it is time to get up. They have all my sympathy, I feel the same.
I sA jst put dem 2 bed earlier, so dat dey wake ^ cuz dey R dn ZZZ. dat iz wot I lIk 2 do 4 myself.
Syag- Not even your infants & babies??
My infants and babies woke ME up. All the time.
That is one of the most confounding complications of childraising:
They start by waking you up until you are in a perpetual state of exhaustion; then they turn the tables, feign exhaustion, and don’t let you wake them up!
Adraba, my children wake us up, most of the time.
At this stage, their internal clocks work very well, B”H.
But some strategies for later on in life; a gentle rub on the head, cheeks, and stretch for hands and feet. A smile always goes a long way.
Popa is right that you should consider putting them to bed somewhat earlier. Nowadays so many people, both kids and adults, are chronically sleep-deprived, which causes all kinds of problems with learning and behavior and mood.
After I first wake up my (small) children, they like to have a minute to lay in bed after waking up before they actually get out of bed. I often turn on energetic music in the living room, usually the same CD they like. That seems to work really well. Hatzlacha!
Thanks for all the suggestions, I really do most of them already, and try very hard not to get angry. I have no interest in discipline types of solutions as that is not the issue. They are the ones who want to be up. And I don’t mind clock suggestions, they just don’t work. I actually do make them say verbally that they are up before I consider it so, but this is about how they sleep, not when they went to bed or whether or not they feel like it. They are not “laying in bed”, they are sleeping.
golfer – so right! My babies never slept long, I have been suffering from sleep deprivation for years, but when my babies were asleep, they slept through EVERYTHING. And I never woke them for feedings or scheduling or any of that. I think this is very hormonal because the problem doesn’t begin til later. My younger ones wake themselves.
Oh – and if any of you see one of my kids here can you switch the topic and pretend we were talking about something else? Thanks
Light their blankets on fire.
Blast metal music on highest volume.
Tell them their father is being arrested by the cops outside.
Pour a bucket of ice into their bed.
Release a swarm of bees into their room.
Inject them with a shot of adrenaline.
Fire off a handgun near them (with blanks, obviously).
Fire off a handgun near them.
Get a fire hose and hose them out of bed.
Spray them with mace.
I think that’s enough for now…
in my sons’ school, if a boy came late too often, they confiscated his shoes.
Really? I’m compatriot of yours and not heard such as thing. Which school? (Initials are fine M PH TV TS BME?)
You can get them an alarm clock for every birthday and Chanuka present.
In my family, it’s the kid’s responsibility to get up. So my parents wake us up once or twice, after that we suffer the consequences. There’s really no point nagging about it.
I wasn’t nagging about it, if that was what you said. And I wasn’t really looking for anyone to insult my parenting when they haven’t a clue, I was actually just trying to make a joke to redirect an unpleasant thread to a new topic. Funny how people feel my kids deserve consequences for not being able to wake up without difficulty. And how quick some of you are to assume that they are late, irresponsible or defiant when I have never indicated anything of the sort. Perhaps that is your own point of reference, B”H it is not the issue.
Syag- Sorry! I did not think through that post. Did not mean to imply you nagged or insult your parenting, from all of your posts, I am sure you are a wonderful mother!
I mean natural consequences, like getting detention. If they are not late than what is the problem with needing to wake them up?
Edit: I get that they want to wake up, but they don’t in the morning. If they really wanted to wake up, then they would go to sleep earlier.
Thank you so much for saying that, I guess I am in overly-sensitive mode today. There are a couple of reasons why this is an issue for me, and I would love to hear what others have to say but I have to figure out a way to mention it without 1) making myself overly vulnerable to the obnoxious-leaning posters and 2) respecting my kids privacy.
On the simplest level though, they are not late but they would be, they don’t want to have to rush so, and have asked for help in this area because they are not finding their own efforts to be successful.
Edit: I get that they want to wake up, but they don’t in the morning. If they really wanted to wake up, then they would go to sleep earlier.
Interesting, how would you know what time they go to bed?
T613- I am not usually a grammar/spelling freak, but I know you are smart so I will just ask you to notice that you consistently spell my name incorrectly. Regards.
Syag: I hear that. B’derech hateva, most people don’t have trouble with oversleeping if they go to sleep on time. I am making an assumption.
It’s really sweet that they want help. Maybe if they smell coffee or something good cooking, it will wake them up?
We have these alarms that vibrate and make unpleasant loud noises, they are extremely annoying but they do get you up.
Torah
“In my family, it’s the kid’s responsibility to get up. So my parents wake us up once or twice, after that we suffer the consequences. There’s really no point nagging about it.”
Will only work if the school is tough on lateness. Not all Yeshivas are so for boys this wouldnt be such an eitza.
Syag
The following will work guaranteed. Buy smelling salts and wave it under their noses for a second or 2 they will be up in no time flat!
Chicken pulka – it was PH, a rabbi C was then principal (1990’S). He was eventually “moved on”. They also did it if kids forgot their sneakers [trainers] for their weekly sports sesion.
It was both painful and humiliating for the children, and I did not mean it as such serious advice. There was once a whole thread here on confiscating shoes in schools – you can probbaly find it under chinuch.
goldersgreener: Must have been after my time because I don’t remember a Rabbi C. Mr Madden, the gentile sports teacher in the 80s was a strange one, so that sounds possible. I think much got exaggerated.
I don’t know whose idea it was originally, corn… or maddern, but they were both strange.
C. is now in manchester.
Do you remeber king? Now, htta was a good teacher.
My kids assure me that maddern was a ??? ????? , , but i personally think that when the kids forgot their sneakers it wasn’t such a bad idea, it taught them ideas of responsibility, that if you forget soemthing you need you are stuck without it, while confiscating shoes for coming late to school was a bit more unfair.
I don’t know who restarted the confiscating shoes business again, but I will just say as follows.
What a child wears is the parents decision. For the school to involve itself with the clothing or footwear is overstepping boundaries.
There are two exceptions:
If the school has rules about clothing, i.e. uniform, sports shoes for sports, etc… then obviously they should enforce them – without humiliating the child.
If a child misuses an item of clothing or footwear, say he throws his shoe(s) at a teacher or classmate, then obviously it is the educators right to proceed as they see fit.
Confiscating footwear if a child comes late to school is definitely overstepping boundaries. The punishment is also out of proportion and unreasonable.
If you really want to use this as a way to get child out of bed, I would suggest parking your car within ten metres of your front door, and at whatever time that you are supposed to leave for school taking their shoes out to the car.
Always remember, a child’s ego is very fragile, and humiliating them in public is never a good idea.
When I was younger and more inclined to sleeping in, my parents used to stand by my doorway, each with their respective squirt bottles, they then proceeded to see how long it took each of them to get water in my ear, and sometimes my nose…it worked pretty well (until I learned to just pull up the covers).
i think the most pleasent way for both parties is to gently tap the child 5 min before they need to get up so now theyr half awake then 5 min later wake them up for real and easier than just “waking up!!” all of a sudden..
torah613 and WIY – Thanks! I like the smell idea and it is probably the only one I haven’t tried yet. I bought some steaks and mesquite and set up the grill in their bedroom. If this doesn’t work I will try the smelling salts (really!)
(I hope you can tell I am making fun of myself and not you)
When I was a teen I bought alarm clocks that went progressively louder. I found that those woke me up. I had to change them every couple of months, but the regular ones lasted much less.
I currently own an alarm clock that has a light that comes on ten minutes before the alarm goes off AND the alarm is a progressive one. Works great!
I personally don’t need an alarm clock. I found stress keeps me from over-sleeping. Sometimes I’m up hours before I need to be.
I love this topic! My younger two are 5 and 8. I bring hot chocolate and let the smell get to them. I tell them if they don’t get up, the hot chocolate will get cold and they won’t get another one. That usually works.
Odd suggestion: what about not interfering at all? Maybe the kids are relying on you to wake them up rather than building in their own internal alarm clocks? Make arrangements with the school to give the kids extra homework, tests, or just plain dock grades for lateness and absence. Then let the kids learn to wake themselves up. It might take a week, but the harsher the consequences, the likelier their motivation will peak.
At the same time, every time they are up on time, have an awesome breakfast waiting for them. If they don’t make it down to the kitchen, eat it yourself!
SaysMe – I am so glad you said that.
funnybone-
similer idea as what i was saying like a few min b4 half wake em up like w ur light that goes on..
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