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Is it common to envy the other’s observance level?
When I was with Reform Jews I felt proud that I generally keep Sabbath while they do not in any way. When I was with Orthodox Jews I felt very bad compared to them.
PS. For the pas few years I had almost no offline contact except for my family and Mathematics adviser.
Kinas Sofrim Tarbeh Chochmah. Being “jealous” of people for doing better than you when you are capable of making yourself better than it’s a great thing. It will lead to you becoming better yourself.
Lost1970: Heaven forbid! It should spur you on to greater heights. Jealousy to bring them down is terrible. Jealousy to make yourself better is what G-d wants from you.
Don’t base your observance on the pride or shame you feel when you compare it to someone else’s observance. Base your observance on what Judaism means to you. Once you have a focus, you can look to the actions of other believers to help keep to it.
Don’t base your observance on the pride or shame you feel when you compare it to someone else’s observance. Base your observance on what Judaism means to you. Once you have a focus, you can look to the actions of other believers to help keep to it.
Well said.
If envy breeds motivation, then it is constructive. If envy will just breed ill will and feelings of inadequacy than it is destructive.
Lost1970
Its hard not compare but you should know that envy is an illusion. You shouldnt compare yourself to others and in most cases you are better than you think and are likely better quantitatively than the person you are comparing yourself to. I learned that on yom kippur. There was a guy in my shul who I thought was such a good Davener he was praying so loud and seemed so into it. I decided to switch my seat to sit next to him for Mussaf. I was shocked that he had his head down by the silent shemoneh esrei so missed praying with the congregation. Then when he picked his head up he tried making conversation with me in middle of the chazzans repetition of musaf. This guy was so far from being into it in a real way. So really stop thinking that you arent that goodand that everyone is better because its simply not true.
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