Toy Weapons

anti, anti, anti.

*kapusta*

I strongly oppose toy weapons of any sort…it promotes violence and initiates a wilder form of play hence pple getting hurt. am i scared that in the future my son would be interested in viloence and weapons not really but the play that comes out of it is unhealthy, meaning physically dangerous and not at all intellectually stimulating…but thats just my opinion. Shabbat Shalom

Toy weapons contribute to a more wild and violent form of play. I believe that this form of play breeds aggression in children, which eventually becomes part of their personality. Why would you, as a parent, want to contribute to creating an aggressive child, and eventually adult?

~a~

so the majority of you are saying that play fighting is negative. does that mean that boys should not be allowed to fool around? i have never met a boy who does not like the occasional wrestling match with his father friend brother etc. does this mean that they will all grow up to be violent?

i think perhaps some thinking needs to be done. there is nothing wrong with pretend play as long as everyone involved realizes that it is PRETEND and not acceptable outside of play time. there is nothing wrong with boys pretending to wrestle, as long as they dont resort to such behavior when they get into an actual fight. playing with guns is a bit more serious, and it depends on what is being done with them. then again, i grew up with a water gun and neither i nor anyone i know would consider me a violent person.

what about paint ball? is that wrong too? and what about sports? they can get violent at times….are we now going to say that children (both boys and girls) should not be allowed to play sports?

Yeah, I don’t like toy guns, etc. but it’s almost inevitable with little boys that any two thin items will be held perpendicular and become a gun. It’s a phase, and as long as they have other toys, etc., that is, this is not their whole play time, you should be fine.

My parents never let us play with toy guns, even on purimma and I plan to do the same with my own children, b”h.

I agree with those who wrote boys will be boys and will turn anything into a “weapon”. My boys are always making guns and swords out of clics and guess what? Because they never watch violence they think that when they “shoot” me I get all wet!

Mchemtob posted; “teaching a child to fight doeas not breed confidence and fighting doesnt necessary mean that they will overcome issues with a bully. kids that fight grow up into adults that fight.”

I can tell you from personal experience this is totally wrong.

I have had to live in fear of others who were bigger then me or trained in some kind of fighting skills or who simply had plenty of friends who would help them bully others.

I have passed up lucrative jobs because they would have been in situations where physical controntaton might be likely either from customers (knocking on doors to seell something for example) or from cowrokers (like in warehouse or construction where everyone spends their free time, thinking about how ‘tough’ they are and sizing everyone else up.

If I were a Blackbelt in some martial arts I woudl not have had that fear and I would have been able to take some of those jobs which in turn would have led to a much better life then I have now.

I was also bullied in school and I am no skileld fighter but I have learned a couple of moves since then and if I knew as a kid what I know now I could have beat those bullies and again my whole life would be very different and far better.

Anyone who thinks fighting skills have nothing to do with self confidence or can’t help stop bullying has no clue, as to what they are talking about.

It’s not just about “burning off aggression” it’s about learning to handle someone elses aggression when you can’t get away and will not listen to anyone trying to talk calmly.

Like in Crown Heights riots for example, if thugs shouting “Kill the Jews” attack a Jew, he needs to know how to defend himself, whether they have sharp objects or weapons or whatever.

The earlier kids start learning this the better they will be able to handle themselves when the time comes.

I remember in Crown Heights many years ago, someone in an apartment building with a mix of Jews and Gentiles, wrote to the Rebbe saying some non Jews were physiaclly harrassing his boy.

The Rebbes response for what I heard was “teach your boy to fight”.

I saw the same cartoons and always knew that no one gets up and walks away from such things.

I did not have the chance to play fight so much and because of that was far less coordinated and slower then the bullies when the real fights came.

Without the many hours of such coordinating skills in such play a kid is at serious disadvantage compared to thsioe he has to face later on.

Sometimes it’s not a matter of “burning off” aggression. Sometimes it’s a matter of learning how to use if effectively and appropriately. In another life I spent about ten years teaching women’s self defense, martial arts and basic firearms safety and marksmanship. There’s an appropriate level of comfort with violence and aggression which makes a kind, law-abiding person capable of fighting or defending herself when appropriate. Think of it as driving on the highway. Go too slow, and you’re a danger to yourself and others. Go too fast, same thing. The tricky part is getting people into the right range. You can go just as wrong either way.

Students who were never permitted to roughhouse as kids and ones who weren’t made to stop both presented challenges. Girls who grew up with older brothers were right in the groove 🙂

vas1820, play is good. Play is how children explore and build up their notions of how the world works. As a very wise person said “Play is the work of children.”

But part of that experimentation is finding out what the acceptable limits are. There is some play which crosses the line of what is healthy and right. For instance, if kids were playing “Cossacks whipping Jews” or “Klansmen lynching Blacks” anyone with a heart or brain would put a stop to it. If play is excessively or repeatedly or increasingly violent that’s not just for pretend. It’s a warning sign that something else is wrong.