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Huh? Pre-registration? Waddya mean by that? And yes, it IS old. But I thought it was worth reminding everybody about 🙂
Another one: my nephew came back from a classmate’s bar mitzvah, and my sister was questioning him about the menu. “And what did they serve for dessert?” she asked. “Chocolate mousse,” he answered, then added, “And fruit salad, cake and chocolates.” (I don’t remember the exact foods so I’m making them up, but he mentioned a few.) My sister was impressed. “Wow! So you mean, on top of the chocolate mousse, they had fruit salad, cake and chocolates, as well?”
“No,” my nephew answered, in all seriousness, “the fruit salad, cake and chocolates were on the side, next to the chocolate mousse.”
@cozimjewish – I meant, before I registered for a YWN account. I was reading the Coffee Room for a couple of years before I mustered up the courage to sign up. 🙂
My three year old says some hilarious things. Yesterday I said something about Hashem being in charge of the whole world and He can see everything. She replied “serious? “
My nephew was crying, so his brother (who was three at the time) asked, “Dovi, why are you leaking?”
My friends sister had a birthday, so I asked her, “Wow, Batsheva! How old are you now? Are you six?”
She replied, “Yes. But I used to be five!” (Like, really??)
I was reading a joke book to my niece, the question was “What is always coming, but never arrives?” (The answer was “tomorrow”)
“Moshiach” she replied 🙂
Coz, I am shepping nachas from your family’s remarks. So cute!
wow gr8 story
oomis – thanks! me too 😀
showjoe – “gr8 story” what did you mean (as in, what was that in reference to)?
the moshiach story, so sweet and pure
🙂
A bunch of kids were making a “cup castle” while visiting Zaidy and Bubby. Their father saw what they were doing and said, “What are you doing? You’re wasting all Bubby’s cups!” To which the kids responded, “Not ALL her cups!”
LOL Sidi! You just reminded me of a really funny story…..unfortunately it would never get approved but it was something like that 😀
But it’s apikorsus, also I think the other one!
(This isn’t the story, just another one that I thought of)
My sister walked into the playroom and it was a HUGE mess. She started telling her kids off. “THIS is what I call…..!!” As she was trying to come up with an appropriate adjective to describe the state of the room, my three-year-old nephew pipes up, “Um…..losing the plot??”
“But it’s apikorsus, also I think the other one!”
Huh?? Which ones are apikorsus and why??
My 9 year old –
If I had a choice of going to school versus not going to school I would pick going to school because I know it’s good for me. . . it’s just the teachers that ruin it.
SL, that is cute!
My brother’s family is going overseas soon and my niece (the one from the Moshiach story 😉 ) said that they might go shopping while they are there. She said to me, “Maybe we’ll buy something! But maybe not. Because it’s enough that my parents are paying for this whole trip, and the planes, which cost a lot.” And this is coming from a second-grader…..
cozimjewish:
“But it’s apikorsus, also I think the other one!”
Huh?? Which ones are apikorsus and why??
This one
I was reading a joke book to my niece, the question was “What is always coming, but never arrives?” (The answer was “tomorrow”)
“Moshiach” she replied 🙂
but not, in fact, this one
My three year old says some hilarious things. Yesterday I said something about Hashem being in charge of the whole world and He can see everything. She replied “serious? “
By the way, how exactly does a 3-year-old come
to know a phrase like “losing the plot?”
Oh, and I had a post explaining why I thought you weren’t from America, but it was rejected, as various posts about how I know things have been (no, really!). I’ll try and edit it to be acceptable sometime, b’li neder.
On Erev Yom Tov, my 5-year-old brother
asked my father why our sukkah didn’t have
a door. He answered, “When you’ll be
a totty, you’ll make a sukkah with a door,
and I’ll come to your sukkah.”
The response he got was
“When I’ll be a totty, you might be dead.”
!!!
I can’t post jokes here cuz my kids might read them and I’m being anonymous here!
“I was reading a joke book to my niece, the question was “What is always coming, but never arrives?” (The answer was “tomorrow”)
“Moshiach” she replied :)”
How on earth is that apikorsus? Remember this kid is a second-grader!! If anything it’s just the opposite!
“By the way, how exactly does a 3-year-old come
to know a phrase like “losing the plot?” “
lol my sister always says that when one of her kids goes absolutely nuts (hyper/tantrum/crazy) “Oh no, <insert name of child> has totally lost the plot…….”
Randomex – that’s so cute:)! My sil was telling me someone in her family once asked, how old does someone have to be when they start talking with a funny accent? (Coz all the old people s/he knows are Holocaust survivors lol)
Randomex would you please enlighten me as to how that was apikorsus….
Sigh… I tried. I hate when long posts are rejected. It’s more work. Then again, maybe it was because of the length. I’ll try posting it in pieces…
Actually, maybe it was something else. I’ll take that out too.
I just noticed (again – I’d forgotten about it) that this thread has
a “tag” in the upper right corner – those eventually stopped being used. I wonder what happens when it’s clicked on?
Okay. “Alter’s” post was allowed, and your post
was allowed, but my post is not allowed (yet).
Maybe if I broke it into smaller pieces and tried
those one by one?
First sentence:
“How on earth is that apikorsus?”
Believing he’s coming (always!) doesn’t mean believing he never will arrive isn’t apikorsus, but it’s not clear that the child actually meant that.
“But it’s apikorsus, also I think the other one!”
Sooo not your style, Randomex! Are you sure it was you?
I was looking after a few kids, and gave them each a lollipop. We were playing the game “If you went to bed before 7, take 4 licks, if you ate cereal for breakfast, take one lick” etc. On of the girls said, “If you drank beer today, take 7 licks.” Being that these kids are about 6/7, I made an assumption and said “Ruti, no-one here drank beer.”
“Yes, I did!” she said. Then, “Oh, wait. I’m getting confused with apple juice.” 😀 (Now that made sense.)
As a little girl, I used to mix up my colors. I once walked up to a black woman and said “lady, why are you blue?”
i once came down with food posioning and had bad stomach pains and was throwing up. My four year old asked me if i wasnt feeling well because i ate too much nosh.
same child: if u squeeze oranges you get orange juice, if you squeeze apples you get apple juice, if you squeeze tomatoes you get tomato dip, if you squeeze watermelon you get water
my daughter was coloring with crayon and after a while i noticed some colorful lines on her face. i asked her who colored on her and she tells me, “nobody, it came like that” (in this all-knowing tone kids use)
this same daughter was drawing a pic of the family. my little one, almost 3 asks her “which one is mine”? so she points to a stick figure. the little one says “put me on a big mouth. i have a big mouth”
When my daughter was 6 years old in first grade she had to do math homework of 1+1 and 1+2 and such, I see her take a calculator to do it. I asked her why? She told me “because I want to be sure I do it right”.
Upon passing a church and seeing a big tzlav with yashka, one of my kids says “I’m scared mommy… On that church they have a hanged man…a dead man”.
I could not stop laughing!
“What makes the germs make us sick? I think it’s because they don’t take a bath. They’re the dirtiest things in the world.”
When I said amen to a bracha: “mommy, only men say a-men, girls say a-main”
In December my 6 year old daughter comes home and says her Morah told her there won’t be bus service next week because the puppet schools(public schools) are closed
The puppet schools were open?
my nephew was reading a book on shabbos, and he read the word “Dr” as “Dister”. His reasoning was that if “Mr” was “Mister”, then “Dr” must be “Dister”….
I read this post:
http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/things-kids-saiddid/page/6?replies=288#post-550988
and it reminded me of a time when a kid was explaining to me how colors work. “Why is purple purple? Coz it likes grapes! Why is yellow yellow? Coz it eats lots of lemons! Why is black black? Coz it eats lots of lollies and doesn’t brush its teeth!”
CIJ, cuuute!
SiDi™
🙂
We got to a store and I realized that I didn’t have my pocketbook on me so my 2 said why don’t we go buy some money?
*2 year old
I like to explore how kids think, so when a friend’s son was about to celebrate his 4th birthday I asked him: “How many years did it take you to turn 4?”
He thought for a moment and announced “6 years!”
My niece got a toy doctor’s set as a present. She was showing me all the parts and explaining their functions. She pointed to one piece and said, “That’s to measure your blood precious.”
I like to have the music on blaring and my brother-in-law doesn’t really like it. One time, my niece said to me, “Tatty says we’re making enough noise to wake the beds.”
Someone thinks EY is in the sky because you get there from the US with an airplane.
Once my brother was telling my mother that he wanted something to eat right before dinner time and my mother didn’t let him, so she told him that some people don’t have food. My other brother butt in “Yeah, like dead people”
i have two cousins and one name starts with a Tzadik and the younger one starts with an Alef. So my aunt said to the older kid “wow you are such a big Tzadik” so the younger one pipes in”And i’m a big Alef”
we had my one of my cousins over for shabbos and my brother was trying to put him to sleep but my cousin wanted to stay up longer so my brother says to the 3 years old “Come X put on your PJ and well have a PJ party”. So my cousin turns to him and says” That’s silly uncle X we don’t eat our PJ”
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