Teimanim With Multiple Wives

I personally heard from a Sefardi Rav in America that someone came from the old country with two wives, an older one and a younger one. As this was not legal in the US, he asked the Rabbanim which wife to divorce. ( I do not know what he was told)

“….do they have a limit today on how many wives they can be married to?”

According to the Shulchan Aruch E”E 76:4 IIRC, there is a limit of 4.

Is it legal in E’Y to marry more than one wife? I have many Sephardic and Yemenite neighbors where I live and all have one wife. Unless the other one is hidden in a closet or something 😉

What the halacha is, is subject to debate. Some people argue that the halachic ban on polygamy should not apply and so far that is not a widely held position. If the United States were to formally recognize polygamous marriages, the halachic debate would become much more “interesting”. At present, America does not consider a second wife (with the first wife still married to the husband) as anything more than the husband’s “girl friend”, with no legal status at all.

Under American law, the first marriage is valid and the second marriage is consider void (i.e. only the first wife can be covered on a joint tax return, and she inherits the spousal share, and only the first wife can own a house as a tenant by the entireties.). However since American law no longer criminalizes consensual intimate relationships, it isn’t clear that criminal bigamy laws would be upheld, complicated by the issue as to whether this is a religious freedom issue.

besalel,

Rashbijr: your implication that having more than one wife encroaches upon pritzis and znus issues is highly ignorant and biased.

Having more than one wife is not an issue of pritzus or znus. Joseph’s seeming fixation with it through multiple posts and threads on the CR may be a different story.

beisyosef

The Dvar Avraham refuted that

Joseph: As I said the issue is subject to debate. Through the mid-20th century, most Ashkenazim lived in countries whose laws prohibitted polygamy, and with criminal penalties for extramarital relationships (e.g. between a husband and a second wife). If western countries legalize polygamy (in part due to Muslim complains that anti-polygamy laws are discriminatory, in part since their religious basis is meaningless to a secular society, and in part since “living together while unmarried” is now lawful there is no logic to penalize “living together while married”), I suspect it will reopen the debate. Note that very few men could support multiple wives, put in an industrial society it might work out especially some some wives held jobs while other provided free child care for the ones with the jobs. Another factor would be if there was shidduch crisis caused by male mortality rising rapidly (a military fiasco in Israel could have that effect) or if it developed that males were likely to be OTD than females – but absent such I doubt polygamy would ever be popular.

Let’s summarize
Ashkenazim continue to hold not to marry more than one wife (if cherem expired then midin minhag.not simple but all Ashkenazim follow this way).No difference between Sephardic and Yemenites.Simply allowed for them,however since it has become general custom to only marry one wife ( not just because it’s illegal) and there are many sources that show that it is generally preferable to have only one wife,some say that in the ” new world” it is also prohibited for sefardim.Since a religious ceremony of marriage is not illlegal and a second marriage license is impossible no question of Dina dimalchusa could even begin.

See Shulchan Aruch Even HaEzer Siman 1…discusses multiple wives at length. the S.A. recommends not more than 4. Grandchildren from Baba Sali’s 3rd wife live in Lakewood. There are those who have multiple wives today. The known ones have a “legal” wife. and the others are friendly to the first and live together usually with {private) Chupah and Kidushin..ie… not registered with the government…so she appears as a “live in”. Others have a “wife” in other countries whom they visit for extended periods. The Vilna Gaon is noted as saying that there are 2 things that are “meakeiv haGeula” stop the redemption of the Jews… 1. that Ashkenazim stopped Birchas Cohanim, which he and his talmidim tried to re-start, and were successful in Eretz Yisroel… and 2. the Cherem of Rabbeinu Gershon forbidding multiple marriages, which he explained was only accepted because of the goyim, and was not a Jewish concept. See the Cherem which says so specifically

the Noda beyehuda?
rav moshe?
.
the dean of gush?

correct.. but know that the current minhag is to include an extra line in the Sefardi Ketubah stating that the Chatan will not take a 2nd wife.

I think no current marriage would withstand this. I guess our concept of marriage is a new fangled thing and in the olden days it was more of a practical thing and less of a ‘soul mate’, BFF type of relationship which is espoused nowadays.

Joseph, not so far as I know but it is better that way. I heard that that was the custom at least after they came to Israel. In fact, Yaakov’s wives and concubines each had her own tent.

Avi, why do you think it is better for a man to have a separate home for each of his wives rather than one home for all his wives?

Joseph, because of the friction having them in one home will cause. I know of an Arab who is mehadrin. He has one wife in Abu Ghosh and another in Cairo, whom he visits on his vacation.

Avi, I know in Teiman some of the Yidden had wives in different cities, with a separate home for each of them.

Milhouse, isn’t the machlokes whether the Cherem expired in 5000 or whether it expired 1000 years after it was issued? I seem to recall that according to those Rishonim that it expired in 5000, it was extended by the rabbonim of the time of expiration. Which would mean that the Cherem today, based on those that hold R”G’s expired, is not based on R”G’s original Cherem but rather on its later extension. It also means that the rabbonim today have the right to end the Cherem, should they consider that to be prudent. I heard Rav Miller zt’l say that the contemporary rabbonim could discontinue it.

Joseph,

1. I think that the Jews in Teiman would have been very surprised to be called Yidden.

2. The Israeli Chief Rabbinate ruled that it is now minhag Yisrael to have only one wife at a time (@Milhouse, their authority is that of a bet din kavua, at least for Israel). In fact, the Mechaber says that the Sephardic ketuba has a clause prohibiting the husband from taking an additional wife without his current wife’s permission.

3. Someone I know told me that an Arab co-worker (he worked for a while in construction) bragged that he can have four wives. My acquaintance replied that that means four mothers-in-law.

Uncle Ben
Very good point .
I knew that after the toeva marriage law, that polygamy would be the next “frontier “, after all, the government shouldn’t have the right to tell us who to marry.
But you are absolutely correct . And the only argument against the idea of multiple husbands is not knowing the father of the children, but that’s easily solved with dna tests.
OTOH
I don’t believe the Supreme Court will ever allow incest bc of genetic abnormalities and obvious coercion arguments

Avi, how many Tanaaim are we told who their wife or wives are? Most wives of theirs aren’t named altogether, so lack of mention doesn’t indicate lack of existence.