Home › Forums › Litoeles H'rabim! › Spiritual Low – How to get out of it?
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March 30, 2009 1:53 am at 1:53 am #589647strivingMember
We all know that spiritual lows are inevitable. But that doesn’t make them any easier to deal with. I’m experiencing a spiritual low right now 🙁 and I was wondering if anyone has some advice regarding how to pick myself up and get out of it.
Thanks! 🙂
March 31, 2009 3:00 am at 3:00 am #642066an open bookParticipantdidn’t see this till now 🙁 how are you doing???
did you check out the carrots, eggs, & coffee thread? that seems to be the place you’re looking for.
March 31, 2009 7:27 am at 7:27 am #642067kapustaParticipantAOB, it takes time for a thread to get through. It may have not gone up until not too long ago.
striving, check out that thread and daven, daven, daven (even just daven at random times throughout the day, like Hashem please help me find a spot or something small like that.) If you’re looking for smaller steps then have extra kavana in asher yatzar (or any bracha.) Or just look outside and see how many people are sitting in a hospital (or are going through anything that you B”H aren’t) that you don’t have to worry about.
March 31, 2009 2:46 pm at 2:46 pm #642068strivingMemberkapusta:
1) For me, in a spiritual low, it’s extra hard to daven so much so I don’t think that’s gonna work for me
2) Looking at other people’s misfortune would probably help if I just in a low mood— but it doesn’t really boost me spiritually.
Thanks for the thought that you put in to answering me. 😉 It is sincerely appreciated.
March 31, 2009 4:01 pm at 4:01 pm #642069I. M. HereMemberhow about listening to a shiur to get some chizzuk on sites like torahanytime.com and the like or calling Kol Halashon or Chazak Hotline by Chofetz Chaim Heritage foundation. I’m not sure of their number though. Maybe someone else can post their number.
March 31, 2009 7:26 pm at 7:26 pm #642071feivelParticipantlook for opportunities for Chesed
drive around looking for frum people waiting at bus stops
if someone sneezes in shul, get him a kleenex box
clean up the shul when no one is around
keep looking for opportunities
keep your eyes open
March 31, 2009 7:27 pm at 7:27 pm #642072areivimzehlazehParticipantChazak has some jolting stories- they definitely help shock you out of any low you may be experiencing
It sometimes helps to get a change of scenery- refresh yourself.
I find that a spiritual low usually comes in the wake of an emotional/physical low. Deal with that- talk it out- and usually the rest will follow
Hatzlocha
March 31, 2009 7:30 pm at 7:30 pm #642073March 31, 2009 7:35 pm at 7:35 pm #642074areivimzehlazehParticipantI second kapusta’s welcome feivel 🙂
March 31, 2009 7:58 pm at 7:58 pm #642075moish01Memberkol halashon – (718)906-6400
March 31, 2009 8:00 pm at 8:00 pm #642076JewessMemberI don’t know if this will help you Striving, but it’s helped me: I found thirteen “Ani maamin”s in an Ashkenaz siddur, after the Shacharit prayers. I’ve had days when I felt like I’m just not sure and I said the “Ani maamin”s and I felt closer to God. (It might help that I understand Hebrew…if you do try it.)
March 31, 2009 8:08 pm at 8:08 pm #642077areivimzehlazehParticipantI like that Jewess- the ani maamin’s are very uplifting
March 31, 2009 8:19 pm at 8:19 pm #642079strivingMemberthanks!
feivel: i love the chessed idea— helping others DOES boost my spiritual mood.
Jewess: I’m gonna try the Ani Maamin idea— sounds great!
March 31, 2009 8:24 pm at 8:24 pm #642080YW Moderator-39MemberMoish, I just needed to check that you were giving the correct number 😉
March 31, 2009 8:25 pm at 8:25 pm #642081moish01Memberyou don’t trust me??
March 31, 2009 8:29 pm at 8:29 pm #642082YW Moderator-39MemberSomeone else also posted a number, which was different. Hence I needed to check which was THE number
March 31, 2009 8:34 pm at 8:34 pm #642083moish01Memberah. got it.
March 31, 2009 8:34 pm at 8:34 pm #642084moish01Memberwhat did you do – make a long distance phone call? 😉
March 31, 2009 8:36 pm at 8:36 pm #642085YW Moderator-39Memberlol, I looked at the link on the site titled “Phone Numbers”
March 31, 2009 8:39 pm at 8:39 pm #642086moish01Memberoh what a brilliant idea 😉 never would have crossed my mind…
March 31, 2009 8:49 pm at 8:49 pm #642087seeallsidesParticipant718-258-2008 Chazak – press 3 for inspiration for lifes challenges – press 2 for personal stories – try 46 – or 1-47 # sign – amazing stories
March 31, 2009 8:51 pm at 8:51 pm #642088anonymisssParticipantseeallsides, thanx for the number, where were you when I really needed that? I think I might try it.
~a~
March 31, 2009 8:55 pm at 8:55 pm #642089I. M. HereMemberfeivel or anyone else- regarding the aspect of doing Chesed and feeling uplifted:
Sometimes after I do a Chesed, I really DO feel real good and then I wonder if I’m bordering on Ga’avah (especially when people thank me or point out something I’ve done good for them.) Where does one draw the line.
March 31, 2009 9:00 pm at 9:00 pm #642090areivimzehlazehParticipantThink & realize how much more is needed. What you accomplished is a drop in the bucket
March 31, 2009 9:04 pm at 9:04 pm #642091anonymisssParticipantI. M. Here, I really don’t think that’s ga’avah. It’s not necessary to flaunt what you’ve done, that might be defeating the purpose. I think it’s perfectly ok to feel good about doing a good thing. Also, remember that when people are on the receiving end of a favor, it makes them feel better when they thank you. So, when you graciously accept their thanks, you can think that this is part of your chessed.
Recently, I went through a very, very hard nisayon that deeply affected me and I fell into a low. I volunteered for a chessed organization at the time and it did make a difference.
striving, best of luck to you in dealing with it. Hashem should give you the strength to snap out of it ASAP.
~a~
March 31, 2009 9:12 pm at 9:12 pm #642092feivelParticipantmaybe there IS some gaavah mixed in with self interest and the Simcha of doing the Boreh’s will.
i can hear the Yetzer HaRah speaking to you, the frum Yetzer HaRah, the trickiest disguise he uses.
when you get to the level of the Chofetz Chaim, then it’s time to start seriously worrying about that gaavah in the mixture. now just try your best to do it as much l’shaym Shamayim as you can.
just do it. you know your Tatti will be happy even if it is not yet Pure.
March 31, 2009 9:21 pm at 9:21 pm #642093anonymisssParticipantI think that when someone is in a spiritual low, the most important thing is to get them happy and feeling good about themselves. That’s why feeling good about doing the chessed is perfectly fine. IMHO.
~a~
March 31, 2009 9:34 pm at 9:34 pm #642094feivelParticipantplease, striving
dont just say you are going to do the following.
please do it at the very first opportunity
please
buy and read “the garden of emunah”
please
March 31, 2009 9:54 pm at 9:54 pm #642095shaatraMemberThroughout the day keep telling Hashem how much u love Him. Just keep repeating it the whole day…talk to Him…
March 31, 2009 10:07 pm at 10:07 pm #642096strivingMemberfeivel– i read the garden of emunah. it is very good. but if seems kind of extreme…
I.M. here: about feeling good when you do chessed, it’s natural! There’s no such thing as really doing a purely selfess thing— even if it’s helping someone else- your gain is feeling good about yourself!
shaatra: can you be a bit more specific about the telling-Hashem-I-love-Him thing?
all of you: i can’t say enough how much it means to me that you’re all putting so much thought into your answers/advice. it shows be how much Jewish people really care about eachother- even anonymously! Thanks!
March 31, 2009 10:20 pm at 10:20 pm #642097seeallsidesParticipantsorry anonymiss-i only just saw this-i hope you are doing better and continue to face each day strongly as you’re protected and cared for by Hashem –
striving – you can do it – sometimes even if something is extreme you can still find that one sentence that really makes you feel better. – try saying tehillim – Dovid Hamelech went through everything and it is like magic – each time you say it – you can see so much more!
March 31, 2009 10:23 pm at 10:23 pm #642098kapustaParticipantanonymisss, I don’t want to take over this thread, but are you doing better?
April 1, 2009 12:03 am at 12:03 am #642099an open bookParticipantstriving: i don’t know if this is what shaatra was referring to, but maybe try to thank Hashem constantly when little things go your way. it helps me realize how much good He gives, that you have a choice of noticing & appreciating, or totally ignoring & writing off as coincidence.
April 1, 2009 12:05 am at 12:05 am #642100anonymisssParticipantkapusta, thanx for asking. Overall, yeah, I do have my days, though.
~a~
April 1, 2009 12:23 am at 12:23 am #642101shaatraMemberStriving: when your driving or sitting in your room, or just alone by yourself say “Hashem I love you so much You care so much about me and do everything for me, I’m so proud to be jewish, I love You so so much…” Just go on about how you feel towards Hashem
April 1, 2009 1:48 am at 1:48 am #642102mw13ParticipantGo to http://www.theshmuz.com. There you can download/stream 188 inspiring, 45 minute long shiurim on various topics. Tust me, they’re amazing.
April 1, 2009 1:58 am at 1:58 am #642103RoshYeshivahMemberIm here: just wanted to add to all those that answered your question. The Shevet Mussar writes that the way to know if you did a good deed or not is to see afterwords if you have a good feeling about it.Because if you have a good feeling after something you did it’s a sign that you did something right.According to this it’s all the more appropriate to feel good after a chesed!
April 1, 2009 2:15 am at 2:15 am #642104strivingMemberAOB– thanks for the clarification! 🙂
April 1, 2009 2:34 am at 2:34 am #642105kapustaParticipantanonymisss, I’m glad to hear that (very glad) and if you want.need to talk you know where to reach me…
man, this healed firefox is SO much better!
April 1, 2009 3:38 am at 3:38 am #642106shaatraMemberStriving: when your alone, driving, in your room, ect tell Hashem “I love You, You do so much for me I appreciate it, I’m so proud to be Jewish, I love you so much…”
April 1, 2009 2:59 pm at 2:59 pm #642107NobodyMemberStriving – I have just come across your post and want to add my few words.
Everyone is human, not superhuman in that everyone has up times and down times. The hardest part of life is seeing through the fog because sometimes it is just too dense to claw through. In which case, take a step back and allow the fog to pass over and past you naturally.
The above explained nice and simply means take a deep breath and allow your spirituality to naurally take it’s course. If you don’t say the whole sefer tehillim every day/week, so what? If you don’t sit and learn 6 hours a day, so what? Nothing, that what.
Don’t set a goal or compare yourself to others. Just take each day as it comes. Try not to question too much at this time as sometimes the answers are not want one wants to hear or are too complicted to deal with.
With all this in mind please know that G-d is with you all the way, holding your hand and guiding you. You just don’t know it.
Once the fog lifts, it’s amazing how bright and blue the sky is. Once you come out of your spiritual low you will see how wonderful the world G-d created is.
April 1, 2009 8:03 pm at 8:03 pm #642108areivimzehlazehParticipantthank you Nobody
an open book
Member
striving: i don’t know if this is what shaatra was referring to, but maybe try to thank Hashem constantly when little things go your way. it helps me realize how much good He gives, that you have a choice of noticing & appreciating, or totally ignoring & writing off as coincidence.
I find my days are exactly like this. From the minute I wake up I’m saying: Please please make me feel refreshed & awake so that I don’t snooze… please let me make it on time… oh wow- B”H, I got here in the nick of time. Please please don’t let there be any crazy challenges or issues today… please give me succes in all that I do today… please help me hold back my anger… then- B”H I didn’t let out that nasty remark. Thank you Hashem! oh thank goodness I didn’t mess that one up- what a success. B”H!! thank goodness that messy issue resolved itself so quickly- oh thank you so much Hashem! oh man, what a miracle! a parking spot! thank heavens! on and on… every single minute is orchestrated from above. Plus- even when it doesn’t feel “good” I try to think “ok, this is really for my benefit”. I tell myself “you’ll see in the long run Who is doing what’s best”
April 1, 2009 8:16 pm at 8:16 pm #642109moish01Membergod, and you wanted to know if I was a lamed vuvnick?? gee.
April 1, 2009 8:23 pm at 8:23 pm #642110areivimzehlazehParticipanthalevei! from your mouth to G-d’s ears, moish 🙂
April 1, 2009 8:26 pm at 8:26 pm #642111moish01Memberha you wish!
April 1, 2009 8:30 pm at 8:30 pm #642112areivimzehlazehParticipantnever heard of that expression? I didn’t mean daven… I meant whatever you said should go straight from your mouth to G-d’s ears
April 1, 2009 8:34 pm at 8:34 pm #642113moish01Memberi know what you meant. there’s no way i’ll ever get to be a regular average guy – never mind a tzaddik or even more, a tzaddik nistar… give it up, man.
April 1, 2009 9:02 pm at 9:02 pm #642116strivingMemberNobody: thanks for your words of chizuk!
areivimzehlazeh: thanks SO much for the illustration of the “G-d-in-your-life-all-day” thing!
I was just talking to my friend who said that in the Alay Shor, it says that the way to “cure” a spiritual low is to “wait it out.” Maybe it depends on what triggered the spiritual low… right?
April 1, 2009 11:47 pm at 11:47 pm #642118an open bookParticipantstriving: maybe, but sometimes when i’m not in a good mood or just sort of down, for no apparent reason (nothing sad or hard really happened), i remind myself that i always eventually feel better again sometime soon. & that i’ve gone through this type of thing before, so i just have to try and do my best & in the next few days life will probably be looking better again. and then it does.
April 2, 2009 4:09 pm at 4:09 pm #642119NobodyMemberStriving, whatever triggered your spiritual low cannot be dealt with whilst you are in this position. It’s like telling someone with a killer of a toothache who is starving “do you want an icecream or some ribs?” Do you really care at this point? No. Get the toothache over with and then think about the icecream or ribs!
Just deal with the day to day living knowing that G-d is holding your hand and supporting you even though you may not know or believe it and once the pain has eased you will then be able to logically and rationally deal with whatever triggered this low.
Take a deep breath and don’t worry so much. Take each day as it comes and deal with it accordingly. Just as the weather changes (in ref to my analagy previous post) so do mooods and apologies for answering your post that was addressed to areivimzehlazeh.
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